by K. K. Allen
Although his voice questions what’s happening, it doesn’t look like he’s going to do anything to stop it. But I give him time to decide.
“I missed you.” I try softly, my voice breaking with each syllable as I roll my hips and inch up his lap. “And I want you inside me.”
His eyes glide from my legs to the thin, black lace of my panties and linger there for a second before rocking his hips upward slowly. Wolf’s jaw is hard, naturally built to intimidate anyone who crosses his path. While the furious look he’s giving me now should send me running, it does the opposite. I feel myself quiver from the inside out as my abdomen clenches in response.
I anticipate him sinking into me and shudder while his finger moves along the edge of my underwear. His careful movements tell me he’s considering his options. Should we, or shouldn’t we? So I beg with a whimper for him to stay with me. I need this. I need him. And I think he needs me too.
He slips one finger beneath the fabric and gently strokes my opening, growling deep in his throat at the feel of me. His eyes close as if he’s in pain. “Fuck, you’re so wet.”
His eyes open again, and he glowers at my shirt before giving it a tug. “Off.” His voice is deep. Commanding. I pull the fabric over my head, and before it’s even hit the ground, Wolf has unfastened my bra. I slip the material away from my body, letting it fall to the floor before looking back at him.
He’s momentarily frozen, drinking me in and admiring my breasts. He’s always been especially enamored by them. A hand runs the length of my side as his tongue slides along his bottom lip. His eyes darken before they flicker back up to connect with mine.
The connection sparks like dynamite in my chest, and I don’t even realize I’m mimicking his movements until I bite down on my bottom lip and grind against his lap. I’m aching to ride him until he remembers how well we fit. How not just our bodies connect, but our souls.
My movement seems to have the desired effect because he takes both hands and rips my underwear down the center, leaving just enough room for his cock to slide into me. I gasp at the sound of the fabric shredding, and a fiery sensation fills my center, aching as raw desire pulses through me.
Wolf cups my breasts with both hands and squeezes gently. I moan, not bothering to be quiet. My heart races as his thumbs circle my nipples before rolling them between two fingers. I cry out from pleasure or pain … maybe both. Wolf could do anything to me right now, and as long as his hands are on me, I’m good with it.
He brings me forward until my breast meets his mouth, licking and then biting down harder than expected. I cry out, and he soothes the ache with another taste before pulling me fully into his mouth, torturing me as he devours both breasts like the hungry beast he is. God, I’ve missed this man. The way my body responds to him. The way he worships me with each touch.
I roll my hips again, trying to find friction against his hardness, but it’s not good enough. I need to ride him. I move more aggressively so he’ll get the hint, but a hand presses into my thighs to stop me. “What do you think you’re doing?” The anger in his eyes is unmistakable.
My breath comes in pants as my frustration grows. “Don’t you want this?”
He growls again, this time louder than the first. He removes his hand from my breast, and a rush of dread fills me.
“You don’t make the rules this time around.”
I open my mouth to ask what he means, but he’s not ready to listen. His eyes are glazed and his finger is slowly rolling over my clit, dangerously close to entering me. “How does this feel?”
It takes a second to find my voice. “G-good.”
“You want more?”
I nod eagerly, then swallow as his thick finger pushes into me, but only up to a knuckle. “That better, baby?”
The evil quirk of his lips tells me just how much he enjoys torturing me. I swallow over my erratic heart and move to push down on him, but he holds my waist steady to stop me.
“More,” I plead.
He pushes in a little further, this time not trying to hide his smile. “Better?”
I glare at him now. He’s toying with me more than usual. “No.” With a swift move, I lift myself from his finger, grab his thickened length and place it at my opening, working my way down. I gasp as I remember with each inch how his girth stretches and fills me until I’m barely breathing.
Wolf chuckles knowingly as he squeezes my ass and presses me down toward his base.
Really? He’s laughing at me now? I’ll wipe the smile from his face soon.
As my muscles adjust to him on the descent, I know I’ll be sore tomorrow, but it will be totally worth it. Being a few days out of practice makes everything feel like our first time, and I know he’s feeling it too. That cocky look in his eyes is fading fast as my tightness moves firmly around him. There’s no escaping now.
Once I’m fully seated, we both let out a sigh and hold each other’s gaze. In this moment, all anger has subsided. We’re together again, the way we’re meant to be. I’m still made for him, and he’s still made for me. No matter what happened, no matter what will happen, this is right.
Before I give into the eager drive inside of me, I lean forward, planting my lips on his. My heart is pounding as he weaves his fingers through my hair and grips the back of my neck before pressing my mouth harder against his. He’s ravenous as he kisses me, his tongue filling my mouth in desperate strokes as he keeps me locked in place.
I didn’t forget how good Wolf tastes. He gives and takes, gentle yet demanding. Kissing him is everything. He is everything.
I’m not even sure when I start riding him. I stay close, my movements small, but I press down with all my weight. We’ve had plenty of intense, quiet sex while on tour. We mastered it when we were trying to keep our relationship a secret from the band and Crawley. It was a lot like this. Slow and careful. Torturous and mind-blowing. Every time our bodies joined, my heart rate accelerated a little more. Just like it’s doing now.
When I begin to feel dizzy from my racing heart, I lift my mouth from his and gulp in air. Wolf’s mouth falls to my neck. I already know what’s coming next, so I arch my back, allowing room for his bared teeth to drag down my sensitive skin until he’s at the crest of my breast. At the same time, his hands grip my ass, shifting his pelvis to rock into me.
It’s not until his mouth latches onto my breast again that I begin to completely lose myself. I feel the match light within me. Not much longer now.
Recognizing that I’m getting close, he plants both hands on my ass and pulls me away from him before slamming me back down. We both groan at the impact, and he does it again, wasting no time in between. He smiles and leans back so he can watch me lift and sink above him. I’m watching him right back, feeling weightless and free as his hooded eyes take me in.
He’s at his breaking point. I can see it in the hardening of his jaw. I’m close to the edge too, but still trying to hold on, never wanting to lose this feeling again.
My mind fogs over, whirling at the feel of him, craving more of his kisses, more of his touches. The buildup is happening so fast. I fight and chase my orgasm at the same time, but all I really want is to live in this moment forever. The deep ache is spreading, and there’s nothing I can do but let go.
“Wolf.” I gasp in anticipation, throwing my head back and pressing my chest into him wildly.
My pace quickens, and each time he fills me I know I’m close to unraveling. I focus on steadying my breathing as sweat drips between us. Just as I’m about to come, he pulls his mouth away and meets my eyes with an upward curve on one side of his lips.
“I’m going to come,” I sigh, and even as I’m saying this, my head starts spinning and the raging fire in me grows. It’s no longer in my control.
His hands move up my slick stomach until he grips my breasts in both hands. I move again. “So fucking tight. C’mon baby. I’m right there with you.”
A warm buzz is released over my entire body as I cras
h down on him again, my orgasm sending me spiraling into an abyss. I’m lightheaded, somewhere between heaven and hell. I’m flying. And then I’m falling. The fall is endless as I ride it out, screaming his name and letting him take control of my movements until he’s releasing his own buildup inside of me.
I might black out for a minute. All I know is that I’m opening my eyes, and my arms are wrapped around a heavy-breathing Wolf. He’s still inside me, and his arms are locked around my waist. We’re breathing together, completely sedated. My body already feels sore, fresh from a crazy, sex-driven workout. Probably the best workout I’ve had in years.
“I missed you so much,” I whisper, praying he doesn’t pull away.
His silence crushes me, but I still don’t remove myself from him. I’m not letting him give up on us that easily. “I know this was just sex.” I hate my own words. “I know you’re still pissed at me. But I love you. You’re why I’m here. I’m going to figure my shit out, I promise. Whatever I have to do, I’ll do it.”
He sighs and kisses my shoulder, filling me with an ounce of hope. “I am pissed. And hurt. And fucking confused. I tell you I love you, and then you run away. I get that you have some big secret, but you didn’t even give me a chance to understand it.” He takes a breath. “I’ve respected your privacy, because I know whatever it is, it’s hard for you. But, Lyric, I can’t keep doing this knowing you’re holding onto a secret big enough to tear us apart. Next time, you might not come back.”
“Wolf,” I plead. “I’m not leaving you again. I swear. It’s you and me, babe.”
He shakes his head. “No, Lyric. It’s not that simple. You scared the shit out of me, and you broke me when you left. That’s not something I ever want to go through again.” He sighs again. “I don’t know what the fuck to do.”
“Can’t we just start over?” I ask, my voice filled to the brim with emotion. “We’re so good together. You can’t deny that.”
He looks at me as if I haven’t heard him at all. But I have. I know what he wants, and I’m ready to let Wolf in on my story. The one where my future was stolen. The one that left me pathless because there never was a plan B.
So I’ll give him what he deserves. My truth. My pain. But this isn’t something I can just say. I need to show him.
He sighs. “I’m not denying anything, but I don’t think starting over is the answer.”
His words all but break me, but at least he’s honest.
I take this moment to lift myself from him. Once standing, I look around the room for my clothes and start dressing. I can hear him behind me, doing the same. Then I remember I have no clue why I’m in his room.
“Wolf, why did I wake up in your bed?”
“You were drunk and passed out at the party last night. No one knew where your room was so I brought you back here.”
“And you slept on the couch?” I shouldn’t be hurt right now, but there’s a pang in my chest at the thought of him unable to be near enough to sleep beside me.
I meet his eyes and he lifts his arms in defeat. “What do you want me to say, Lyric? I’m fucked up over you leaving. You’re the only one in my life who’s ever gotten me to open up, and I’m trying to not regret doing it. I don’t know. Maybe we just need more time. We went full throttle ahead, and that probably wasn’t smart. We obviously don’t know each other very well, and you clearly don’t trust me enough to let me in. To be completely honest, right now, I don’t have much trust in you either.”
“Wolf—” I plead.
“Lyric.” He sounds exasperated. “You can’t just hop on my dick and make everything better.”
My mouth falls open. “You weren’t complaining a few minutes ago.” I can’t stop the burn in my tone.
He walks past me, his jaw hardening by the second. It’s like all his anger from last night is coming back. When his hand reaches the door and he opens it, I realize what he’s doing.
He’s kicking me out. What the fuck? Embarrassment and rage swirl within me. I step up to him, making no move to leave, then place my hand on the door and slam it shut.
“We’re going to talk about this, and you don’t get to cut me off. You don’t get to kick me out of your room, either.”
He leans into me so his nose is just inches from mine. “And you don’t get to walk away from me and show up four days later acting like you didn’t completely fucking ruin me.”
A tear slips from my eye, and I can’t help it; I throw my arms around his waist and meet his fierce gaze with a soft, fearful one of my own. “You know I didn’t have a choice, but I am sorry for the way I left. You need to trust me. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be than with you.”
He glares down at me. “Does that mean you’re ready to talk? Tell me what the big secret is, Lyric. What’s worth more to you than us?”
I’m lost for words. Nothing is the simple answer. Nothing is worth more than being with Wolf. Do I want to tell him everything? Yes. Am I ready to reveal my every insecurity and all the resentment I have for my parents so he can understand the effect it’s had on my life? Yes. At least, I think I am.
I open my mouth, a weak attempt to respond to his question, but he holds up a hand and shakes his head. “No. I deserve more than this from you.” He opens the door again, a sad look darkening his features. “We’ll talk later, Lyric. We’ve both got work to do. Until you’re ready, I think that’s all this should be. Work.”
Stunned into silence, I release my grip from his waist and move through the door. “Sure,” I respond without turning around. I won’t let him see the pain that I feel. “Business as usual. I can do that.”
Chapter Eight
Wolf
Why am I the one standing here, feeling like the biggest asshole in the world when I’m just protecting my heart?
Lyric is long gone, and I’m still standing half in the hallway, half in my room. Wanting to go after her but making myself wait for her to come around. We can’t just jump back into what we were before. Things have changed. If we’re going to do this, we need to trust each other.
Maybe I shouldn’t have let her fuck my brains out, but I needed it just as much as she did. And I still love her. I may not have said those words, but if she was paying any attention at all, my mouth, my hands, my eyes—they all spoke to her.
Lyric has always been a rock star in the sack. She loves the control. But I’ve never seen her like that. Unbridled. Ravenous. Completely lost in the feel of me. I loved every second of it, and just thinking about this morning will make it difficult for me to stay away from her. But I need to try.
I can’t just give in to her. How do I know she won’t pull the same shit and leave again? I don’t. Not until she knows she can trust me with whatever she’s keeping hidden. So that’s what needs to happen because there’s no denying what we have is incredible. At least, it will be when she’s ready.
“Wolf!” Derrick’s voice blares from my phone. “Hurry your lazy ass up, man. We’ve got rehearsal in five minutes, and Crawley’s got not one, but a few sticks up his ass today.”
As I walk down the stairs to the lobby, I see Derrick pacing back and forth. I hang up on my end of the line and chuckle as I watch him get pissed, thinking I’m ignoring him. Then he sees me crossing the lobby and glares.
I roll my eyes, following him through the sliding glass door to the sidewalk. “When does he not have a stick up his ass?” I laugh.
“Hey, sugar,” Derrick greets a smiling Terese, who’s standing just outside the doors. He swoops her up and kisses her before letting her catch a ride on his back for the rest of the walk to our waiting van. He turns back to me. “I think Lyric’s got Crawley all riled up. She’s already confirming bookings for Europe and emailed him some stuff, but he’s still giving her shit. And you know her. She’s not taking it.”
Terese giggles. “Lyric’s a badass. When’s Crawley going to learn not to mess with her?”
I smirk, agreeing with Terese. “I’ve got plans for that dou
chebag. Don’t let him get to you. Where’s Lyric?”
“I’m covering for her,” Doug replies as he comes up behind me.
“What? Why?” I’m surprised by my anger, and it takes me a second to realize I’m upset because I was looking forward to seeing her. “She just got back on tour and she’s already bailing?”
Doug chuckles and holds the van door open for me. He eyes Crawley and then leans in. “Dickhead over there has her working on some things for Europe. They went at it this morning in the lobby, so I figured I’d help keep them apart since it’s my last day, anyway.”
I nod. “Fine. Tell me about it later. I’d like to know what he’s got her doing.”
“Sure thing.”
We spend less than an hour at rehearsal, just going through the motions. I think I’m the only one not painfully hungover after last night’s party, but I’m still as distracted as everyone else. I’m preoccupied with thoughts of Lyric’s return and our fight this morning. She’s had this effect on me since the day we met. She’s like a branding iron, scalding and raw upon first kiss, then permanently engrained where it hurts the most: my fucking heart. And nothing I do can make it go away.
Everyone’s still in zombie mode when we get back to the hotel, so we head straight for the restaurant on the first floor and have the waitstaff pull four tables together for us near the back of the restaurant. The crew is loud and boisterous as always, even after a late night of drinking. Until Lyric walks in, that is, and all eyes turn to her. I couldn’t pull mine away if I fucking tried.
She smiles sweetly at Melanie and pulls out the empty chair next to her. I shift, feeling the anger from earlier bubble up within me. If this were a week ago, there would be no question about who Lyric was going to sit next to.
