by DW Cee
“Um, hi” I waved to a nice looking middle-aged lady.
“I’m Melissa, one of Jamie’s sisters and this is my husband, Matt,” she introduced herself with all smiles.
With all the introductions done, I found the pro-Olivia group slightly outweighed the anti-Olivia group. Of course, all the men were in the pro-Olivia group.
“Do you want more food?” Melissa did her best to be our hostess with the mostess. It helped ease the pain of being at a place where we were clearly unwanted and it hurt me to see Mom so on edge. She wasn’t her carefree, can-get-along-with-anyone self. Jamie, too, was walking on eggshells. He was on the offensive where his mother was concerned and on the defensive where my mother was concerned. A huge headache was coming on.
“Dani!”
“Hi Ian.” I called him with the idea that talking to Ian would help get my mind wrapped on more young-adult issues.
“Are you back? Can I come pick you up?”
“I’m at Jamie’s parents’ home right now and yeah, I’d love it if you could come pick me up as soon as humanly possible.”
“Jamie’s parents’ home? I thought your mom and he were breaking up.”
“Nope. Now they’re getting married.”
“What? Boy, you Kingston ladies move fast.”
“It’s not us Kingston ladies. It’s one Olivia Kingston. I’ll fill you in when you come get me. How long, you think?”
Walking back into the house, I realized calling Ian was the brightest idea I’d had in a long time. He’d be here in less than five minutes and I’d leave Mom and Jamie to sort out their mess.
I headed straight towards Mom to let her know that I’d be gone for a few hours but would be home in plenty of time to do any last minute packing for our departure. The scene I found ahead of me with Mom and a steady stream of tears rolling down her face, made me stop dead and stare into a nursery with her.
“She’s gorgeous, Matt.” Cradling the newborn, Jamie kissed the top of his niece’s forehead.
“Of course, she’s gorgeous. Consider the source.”
“Yeah, we Hutchisons are good looking people, huh? All the kids are stunning.”
“Speaking of stunning, how’s it going with Olivia?”
“We’re getting married.”
It didn’t bode well that he sounded so apprehensive.
“Congrats, bro! Are you going to make an announcement soon…like tonight?”
“Yeah, I’d like to but…”
I could see why Mom had started crying. Whereas her first proposal came with a declaration of, I-wanna-marry-you-as-soon-as-possible, her second one was filled with all kinds of hesitancy. Even I, a mere eighteen year old, could sense Jamie's doubts.
“But what? Are you worried about your Mom?”
“Yeah…”
“Yeah? Is there more?”
“I love Olivia and I know there’s been much progress with infertility and medicine but…I’d like to have children, and as many as possible. Plus, there’s the issue of Mom and Dad and the burden to…”
I didn’t hear the rest because I saw Mom running to the door.
“Mom! Wait up!”
Unbelievably, she stopped at my hollering and turned back to me.
“Ian’s here.” I pointed to my punctual boyfriend who pulled up like a magic carpet ride during this not-a-very-happily-ever-after afternoon.
After one glance at the both of us, my discerning and sensitive as always boyfriend kept his mouth shut and drove us straight home. During the half hour ride, Mom breathed heavy to keep from crying and zoned out the window. My heart broke into a million pieces for her. The surly part of me thought this was inevitable with the speed at which their relationship progressed. But the loving daughter part of me wanted to hold Mom in my arms and tell her she was better off without Jamie. We would get through this together. For minutes during the ride, the surliness beat out the sympathetic daughter, but one look at my mother and I couldn’t help but want to cry with her.
“Shall I leave you here?” Ian whispered.
The exhaustion of this afternoon plus sheer will power must have knocked out Mom because next thing I knew, she woke up when the car stopped – eyes puffy, throat scratched.
“Ian. I’m so sorry to ask you this but do you think you can wait here just a few minutes while I get our suitcases? I’d like to stay by the airport just in case we can catch the red-eye tonight instead of tomorrow night.”
“Sure thing, Mrs. Kingston. Take your time.”
“How can I help, Mom?”
“There are two suitcases by the front door. If you and Ian will load them up, I’ll check online to see if I can change our flight and do one last check around the house.” With that, Mom left to go do her thing and I was seriously bummed that our reunion was cut even shorter.
“Sorry,” I whispered.
“What happened?”
“In a nutshell, Mom tried to break-up, Jamie won her back with a proposal, then lost her when Mom overheard him saying her infertility was a burden.”
“Rough!”
“Tell me about it.” My head fell onto Ian’s chest after we loaded the car. “I hope Mom will be alright.”
“If she can survive losing your father, I think she can survive this break-up.”
“I was hoping to spend more time with you,” I whined into his chest.
With a kiss to the top of my head, he whispered, “we’ll spend every waking moment together when I get to Africa, okay?”
“Yeah.”
I didn’t have much time to be sad as Mom successfully booked us on the flight heading out tonight rather than tomorrow night. Additionally, I wasn’t sad because Mom informed the us that Ian’s mom agreed to let him join us in Africa for the entirety of our trip. That would be almost a whole month of togetherness. We, as in my boyfriend and I, phoned his mom and thanked her profusely for generously giving up her youngest son to a family she barely knew. That was huge for all of us involved.
Ian and I silently did our happy dance while Mom silently cried. Being the selfish teenager that I was, I decided to be happy for myself for a while before getting on a long flight and staring into Mom’s devastated eyes.
“Dani, we have a good five hours before they start boarding us, why don’t you drop me off at the airport and you two go have dinner. Just meet me at the gate by 11:00pm, okay?”
“Are you sure, Mom? I don’t mind staying with you.”
“Yeah, Mrs. Kingston. Dani and I’ll see each other in a short week. We can say good-bye here.”
“We only have two bags to check-in. I can do that on my own. And it’s a long time to sit around for five hours. You two go and have fun. I’m behind on one of my translations. I’d like to get that emailed before we leave tonight.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yes.” She hugged me and I knew she wasn’t sure but it also seemed like she needed alone time. Truly, this wasn’t me being selfish and trying to hang with Ian as long as possible. I just wanted to help her any way I could.
“Maybe you should’ve stayed with your mom,” Ian gingerly chided.
“I think she wants to be alone. She won’t be able to think over what’s happened to her nor will she be able to cry when she wants to, if I’m around.”
“Do you think you should give Jamie a call and let him know you’re leaving early?”
“First of all, Jamie is my least favorite person right now. Second of all, I’m sure Mom will have choice words for him when she gets around to it. And lastly, even if I wanted to yell at him, I don’t have his number,” I giggled after sounding threatening. That earned me a kiss on the cheek.
OLIVIA - 2005 FOUR MONTHS LATER
“My gosh, Olivia, what happened to you?” I stood in front of George and Meghan’s house not having a single idea how to put my life back together. I’d lost Jamie, Dani, and if I didn’t get my act together, I’d lose this precious baby who was four months old and growing in my belly.
“I didn’t know where else to go…” I collapsed onto Meghan’s couch and tried to push away the wracking sobs. Meghan patiently waited with me, holding me gently in her arms.
“I’m glad you’re here, Liv. George and I have been so worried. Did you stay with your mom the whole time?”
I nodded my head yes.
“Is Dani settled?”
“Yes,” I whispered. Though, I didn’t know how she was truly doing. Mom and Ian both told me she was acting like nothing happened between us but this separation had to be ailing her as it was killing me. I’d lost one child to save another.
“Are you back to work things out with Jamie? I think you may have to hurry and catch him before he leaves. George told me he quit the company not long ago and was moving away.” Meghan cautiously warned me. “I can call George and get him to ask around for Jamie’s information.”
“No,” I sighed. “Don’t bother. It’s too late.”
“Liv, it’s never too late. Jamie was crushed when you left and he begged George for your contact information. It was really hard for George to keep all your info away from him. He was very angry with George toward the end.”
“I’m sorry I put you both in that situation. It’s over now, so…” The heart-splitting pain lanced through me again.
“I think she’s waking up,” I heard George whisper.
I woke up disoriented and surprised to find myself huddled in a blanket on George and Meghan’s living room. Quickly my head rewound what had happened this morning and the unfortunate events all came back to me.
“Here’s some water, Liv.” Meghan handed me a cold glass of water and helped me up. “Are you able to have some dinner with us?”
“You okay?” George had that same concerned look etched on his face since Paul died.
“Yeah,” I resigned to be stronger and healthier for the baby living inside me. “Let’s have dinner and I’ll tell you what’s been going on the past four months.”
Before sitting at the dining table, I greeted Paul and Nellie. They had grown so big in my four-month absence. They would be one before long and at the rate Paul was moving, he’d be walking really soon. I picked up a speed crawling Paul and kissed him all over. Then I did the same for Nellie. I’d missed them both dearly. Soon they’d have a playmate in mine and Jamie’s child.
“What? You’re having Jamie’s baby?” Meghan and George both dropped their forks and yelled loudly enough for the twins to stop making a mess on their high chairs and stare our way.
“Isn’t that ironic?” My laugh was anything but ironic. “While Jamie thought I’d be a burden to him because I couldn’t have kids, I was already pregnant with our child. What’s even more ironic is that with this baby, I haven’t even seen a doctor yet. I’ve been from here to France to Africa to the east coast and back. I’ve been crying, heartbroken, not eating well and mentally unstable but this one…” I touched my protruding stomach with all the love of a mother who thought she could never have kids again, “this one stayed put. He’s a fighter, this little one. I can’t wait to meet him!”
“Okay, so let me recap.” George looked utterly baffled. “You left Jamie after you heard him talking about wanting a kid. Then you didn’t return any of his calls the whole time you were out of the country and on the east coast getting Dani settled. Then you came back a couple of months ago and it was Jamie who didn’t want to see you anymore.”
“Yeah,” I cried softly, though George didn’t notice.
“Now you’re pregnant with Jamie’s child so the two of you can get married and live happily ever after once I locate him for you.” He had such a satisfied look on his face. “Right?”
“Well, George, not exactly.”
“Now what’s the problem?”
“Will you stop interrupting and let her finish her story?” Meghan butted in with exasperation. “I don’t know how much longer the twins will be content making a mess of their food."
I laughed for the first time all day. The twins had been patient as I unloaded my drama.
“Finally a few days ago I realized that there was something different about my body. I’d gained weight, my cycle had stopped and I thought maybe I was going through an early stage of menopause. It was Mom who suggested I take a pregnancy test. I thought that was such a ridiculous idea I didn’t do as she suggested. I guess moms are always right because I took the test she bought for me and I was four months pregnant.”
“Oh my gosh, Liv. I’m so happy for you and Jamie.” Meghan went to pick up Nellie who was unknowingly starting a food fight with her brother.
“Well, don’t be too happy just yet.” I followed suit, picked up Paul, and started stripping him of his food-sodden clothes.
“I told you how angry Jamie was when I came back to talk to him two months ago. He literally told me he could not forgive me for leaving him the way I did and it was his turn not to contact me for two months. I think that hurt more than hearing him tell his brother-in-law that I was his burden.”
George took Paul from me when he saw the tears roll down my face.
“Soon after I took the test, I called Dani and told her I was going to try and make amends with Jamie again. She was furious with me. She had seen me suffer through the first few months without Jamie. She then called me daily when she saw how devastated I was when Jamie rejected my olive branch. Even then, she begged me not to get back together with him. In many ways she was angrier with him than I was with him. This time, she told me she’d never speak to me again if I tried to reconcile with Jamie.” I had to stop. The pain of losing my daughter was indescribable.
I went back to my couch and cried inconsolable tears wondering where I’d gone wrong to lose my husband and child simultaneously, then my fiancé and child again.
“The babies are down. Do you want to talk some more? I asked George to stay upstairs so we can chat privately.”
“Meghan, please tell me if the choice I made was the wrong one. If it was, then I’ll try and reverse it if possible.”
“Which choice, Liv?”
“I chose to make amends with the father of my child knowing that my adult child might never forgive me. She doesn’t know about the baby. She told me I disgusted her for choosing a man over her own flesh and blood.”
“Oh honey, you didn’t choose one over the other. Dani loves you. You’ll both be fine once everything is out in the open,” were Meghan’s words of comfort. “Why didn’t you tell Dani about the baby?”
“She was so angry from the start of the conversation I didn’t know where to fit in the baby. Plus, I was unsure of what would happen with Jamie when I got here. I just left Dani hoping I would be able to patch things up with her once I got back to my mom’s.”
“So what of Jamie?”
“Jamie’s done too.”
“Honey, don’t say that. He’ll be thrilled when he hears about the baby.”
“He won’t hear about the baby.”
“What do you mean? Why would you keep this wonderful news from him?”
“I stopped by his apartment before I came to your doorstep this morning and walked in on Rose and Melinda. They were packing up all of Jamie’s belongings. Rose gloated that Jamie and Melinda were getting married and moving away from a place that held so many bad memories for him. Then Melinda twisted the knife by telling me she was expecting their first child.”
“No!”
“Yep. In a nutshell, I’m screwed. Forty year old pregnant woman loses her fiancé, her eighteen year old daughter and will be raising a child alone, out of wedlock. They could make a reality TV show out of my life.” I laughed.
We both laughed.
“What’s so funny, ladies. Do we have good news?”
“Nope!” we both called out.
“Did you know Jamie and Melinda were getting married and moving?”
“I knew Jamie was moving, though I’m unsure where. I hadn’t heard he was getting married. But then again, I wasn’t his favorite person.”
“Sorry. My fault. He’s also expecting another child with Melinda as well as with me.” I giggled again.
“What?” George bolted upright from his seat. “Does he know this?”
“I assume he knows he’s having a child with Melinda but I won’t tell him about our child. If he’s finally settled down with her I don’t want to ruin their life by telling them about my baby.”
“Liv, it’s his baby too. You should let him know.”
“Meghan, I don’t think it’s a good idea. I’ve decided to ask Lydia and Joe if I could stay with them for the duration of this pregnancy. I’ll have the baby under their care and then I’ll decide what to do from there.”
“What about Dani?”
“I’ll go back to Mom’s and try one more time to reach out to her before going back to Africa. Depending on Dani’s response to my groveling, I may not tell her about the baby so could you both reach out to her as well but not mention the pregnancy?”
“Sure,” they both whispered at the same time.
“Will you stay with us tonight?” Meghan pleaded.
“Yeah, I’d like that. I’d like to spend some more time with the four of you before I leave. I don’t know when I’ll be back…”
OLIVIA 2010
“Olivia, Ollie!” Jamie was running toward us at the park.
“Hi Mr. Hutchison!” Ollie ran to his dad and hugged him enthusiastically.
“Where were you Monday? Didn’t you tell me you and your mom come here every Monday after her work? I’ve been coming here every day during lunch looking for you.”
I guess father and son had been talking without my knowledge. I didn’t expect to see Jamie here again, though I’d hoped.
“Mommy’s been sick. We couldn’t come till today,” Ollie explained.
“What’s wrong, Liv?” Jamie performed a thorough check of my forehead, cheeks and neck. I had to laugh while pulling away. He still had a child-like side to him that made our seven year age gap apparent. “Are you okay?”
