‘You have a lot to learn, young man,’ said Mr Parker Pyne.
‘I wish you’d come along and see Betty and have a good talk about it all.’
Mr Parker Pyne accepted the invitation readily.
Betty and her sister and her husband lived in a small dilapidated villa a little way back from the sea. Their life was of a refreshing simplicity. Their furniture comprised three chairs, a table and beds. There was a cupboard in the wall that held the bare requirements of cups and plates. Hans was an excitable young man with wild blond hair that stood up all over his head. He spoke very odd English with incredible rapidity, walking up and down as he did so. Stella, his wife, was small and fair. Betty Gregg had red hair and freckles and a mischievous eye. She was, he noticed, not nearly so made-up as she had been the previous day at the Pino d’Oro.
She gave him a cocktail and said with a twinkle:
‘You’re in on the big bust-up?’
Mr Parker Pyne nodded.
‘And whose side are you on, big boy? The young lovers—or the disapproving dame?’
‘May I ask you a question?’
‘Certainly.’
‘Have you been very tactful over all this?’
‘Not at all,’ said Miss Gregg frankly. ‘But the old cat put my back up.’ (She glanced round to make sure that Basil was out of earshot) ‘That woman just makes me feel mad. She’s kept Basil tied to her apron strings all these years—that sort of thing makes a man look a fool. Basil isn’t a fool really. Then she’s so terribly pukka sahib.’
‘That’s not really such a bad thing. It’s merely “unfashionable” just at present.’
Betty Gregg gave a sudden twinkle.
‘You mean it’s like putting Chippendale chairs in the attic in Victorian days? Later you get them down again and say, “Aren’t they marvellous?”’
‘Something of the kind.’
Betty Gregg considered.
‘Perhaps you’re right. I’ll be honest. It was Basil who put my back up—being so anxious about what impression I’d make on his mother. It drove me to extremes. Even now I believe he might give me up—if his mother worked on him good and hard.’
‘He might,’ said Mr Parker Pyne. ‘If she went about it the right way.’
‘Are you going to tell her the right way? She won’t think of it herself, you know. She’ll just go on disapproving and that won’t do the trick. But if you prompted her—’
She bit her lip—raised frank blue eyes to his.
‘I’ve heard about you, Mr Parker Pyne. You’re supposed to know something about human nature. Do you think Basil and I could make a go of it—or not?’
‘I should like an answer to three questions.’
‘Suitability test? All right, go ahead.’
‘Do you sleep with your window open or shut?’
‘Open. I like lots of air.’
‘Do you and Basil enjoy the same kind of food?’
‘Yes.’
‘Do you like going to bed early or late?’
‘Really, under the rose, early. At half past ten I yawn—and I secretly feel rather hearty in the mornings—but of course I daren’t admit it.’
‘You ought to suit each other very well,’ said Mr Parker Pyne.
‘Rather a superficial test.’
‘Not at all. I have known seven marriages at least, entirely wrecked, because the husband liked sitting up till midnight and the wife fell asleep at half past nine and vice versa.’
‘It’s a pity,’ said Betty, ‘that everybody can’t be happy. Basil and I, and his mother giving us her blessing.’
Mr Parker Pyne coughed.
‘I think,’ he said, ‘that that could possibly be managed.’
She looked at him doubtfully.
‘Now I wonder,’ she said, ‘if you’re double-crossing me?’
Mr Parker Pyne’s face told nothing.
To Mrs Chester he was soothing, but vague. An engagement was not marriage. He himself was going to Soller for a week. He suggested that her line of action should be non-committal. Let her appear to acquiesce.
He spent a very enjoyable week at Soller.
On his return he found that a totally unexpected development had arisen.
As he entered the Pino d’Oro the first thing he saw was Mrs Chester and Betty Gregg having tea together. Basil was not there. Mrs Chester looked haggard. Betty, too, was looking off colour. She was hardly made-up at all, and her eyelids looked as though she had been crying.
They greeted him in a friendly fashion, but neither of them mentioned Basil.
Suddenly he heard the girl beside him draw in her breath sharply as though something had hurt her. Mr Parker Pyne turned his head.
Basil Chester was coming up the steps from the sea front. With him was a girl so exotically beautiful that it quite took your breath away. She was dark and her figure was marvellous. No one could fail to notice the fact since she wore nothing but a single garment of pale blue crêpe. She was heavily made-up with ochre powder and an orange scarlet mouth—but the unguents only displayed her remarkable beauty in a more pronounced fashion. As for young Basil, he seemed unable to take his eyes from her face.
‘You’re very late, Basil,’ said his mother. ‘You were to have taken Betty to Mac’s.’
‘My fault,’ drawled the beautiful unknown. ‘We just drifted.’ She turned to Basil. ‘Angel—get me something with a kick in it!’
She tossed off her shoe and stretched out her manicured toenails which were done emerald green to match her fingernails.
She paid no attention to the two women, but she leaned a little towards Mr Parker Pyne.
‘Terrible island this,’ she said. ‘I was just dying with boredom before I met Basil. He is rather a pet!’
‘Mr Parker Pyne—Miss Ramona,’ said Mrs Chester.
The girl acknowledged the introduction with a lazy smile.
‘I guess I’ll call you Parker almost at once,’ she murmured. ‘My name’s Dolores.’
Basil returned with the drinks. Miss Ramona divided her conversation (what there was of it—it was mostly glances) between Basil and Mr Parker Pyne. Of the two women she took no notice whatever. Betty attempted once or twice to join in the conversation but the other girl merely stared at her and yawned.
Suddenly Dolores rose.
‘Guess I’ll be going along now. I’m at the other hotel. Anyone coming to see me home?’
Basil sprang up.
‘I’ll come with you.’
Mrs Chester said: ‘Basil, my dear—’
‘I’ll be back presently, Mother.’
‘Isn’t he the mother’s boy?’ Miss Ramona asked of the world at large. ‘Just toots round after her, don’t you?’
Basil flushed and looked awkward. Miss Ramona gave a nod in Mrs Chester’s direction, a dazzling smile to Mr Parker Pyne and she and Basil moved off together.
After they had gone there was rather an awkward silence. Mr Parker Pyne did not like to speak first. Betty Gregg was twisting her fingers and looking out to sea. Mrs Chester looked flushed and angry.
Betty said: ‘Well, what do you think of our new acquisition in Pollensa Bay?’ Her voice was not quite steady.
Mr Parker Pyne said cautiously:
‘A little—er—exotic.’
‘Exotic?’ Betty gave a short bitter laugh.
Mrs Chester said: ‘She’s terrible—terrible. Basil must be quite mad.’
Betty said sharply: ‘Basil’s all right.’
‘Her toenails,’ said Mrs Chester with a shiver of nausea.
Betty rose suddenly.
‘I think, Mrs Chester, I’ll go home and not stay to dinner after all.’
‘Oh, my dear—Basil will be so disappointed.’
‘Will he?’ asked Betty with a short laugh. ‘Anyway, I think I will. I’ve got rather a headache.’
She smiled at them both and went off. Mrs Chester turned to Mr Parker Pyne.
‘I wish we had never come to t
his place—never!’
Mr Parker Pyne shook his head sadly.
‘You shouldn’t have gone away,’ said Mrs Chester. ‘If you’d been here this wouldn’t have happened.’
Mr Parker Pyne was stung to respond.
‘My dear lady, I can assure you that when it comes to a question of a beautiful young woman, I should have no influence over your son whatever. He—er—seems to be of a very susceptible nature.’
‘He never used to be,’ said Mrs Chester tearfully.
‘Well,’ said Mr Parker Pyne with an attempt at cheerfulness, ‘this new attraction seems to have broken the back of his infatuation for Miss Gregg. That must be some satisfaction to you.’
‘I don’t know what you mean,’ said Mrs Chester. ‘Betty is a dear child and devoted to Basil. She is behaving extremely well over this. I think my boy must be mad.’
Mr Parker Pyne received this startling change of face without wincing. He had met inconsistency in women before. He said mildly:
‘Not exactly mad—just bewitched.’
‘The creature’s a Dago. She’s impossible.’
‘But extremely good-looking.’
Mrs Chester snorted.
Basil ran up the steps from the sea front.
‘Hullo, Mater, here I am. Where’s Betty?’
‘Betty’s gone home with a headache. I don’t wonder.’
‘Sulking, you mean.’
‘I consider, Basil, that you are being extremely unkind to Betty.’
‘For God’s sake, Mother, don’t jaw. If Betty is going to make this fuss every time I speak to another girl a nice sort of life we’ll lead together.’
‘You are engaged.’
‘Oh, we’re engaged all right. That doesn’t mean that we’re not going to have any friends of our own. Nowadays people have to lead their own lives and try to cut out jealousy.’
He paused.
‘Look here, if Betty isn’t going to dine with us—I think I’ll go back to the Mariposa. They did ask me to dine …’
‘Oh, Basil—’
The boy gave her an exasperated look, then ran off down the steps.
Mrs Chester looked eloquently at Mr Parker Pyne.
‘You see,’ she said.
He saw.
Matters came to a head a couple of days later. Betty and Basil were to have gone for a long walk, taking a picnic lunch with them. Betty arrived at the Pino d’Oro to find that Basil had forgotten the plan and gone over to Formentor for the day with Dolores Ramona’s party.
Beyond a tightening of the lips the girl made no sign. Presently, however, she got up and stood in front of Mrs Chester (the two women were alone on the terrace).
‘It’s quite all right,’ she said. ‘It doesn’t matter. But I think—all the same—that we’d better call the whole thing off.’
She slipped from her finger the signet ring that Basil had given her—he would buy the real engagement ring later.
‘Will you give him back this, Mrs Chester? And tell him it’s all right—not to worry …’
‘Betty dear, don’t! He does love you—really.’
‘It looks like it, doesn’t it?’ said the girl with a short laugh. ‘No—I’ve got some pride. Tell him everything’s all right and that I—I wish him luck.’
When Basil returned at sunset he was greeted by a storm.
He flushed a little at the sight of his ring.
‘So that’s how she feels, is it? Well, I daresay it’s the best thing.’
‘Basil!’
‘Well, frankly, Mother, we don’t seem to have been hitting it off lately.’
‘Whose fault was that?’
‘I don’t see that it was mine particularly. Jealousy’s beastly and I really don’t see why you should get all worked up about it. You begged me yourself not to marry Betty.’
‘That was before I knew her. Basil—my dear—you’re not thinking of marrying this other creature.’
Basil Chester said soberly:
‘I’d marry her like a shot if she’d have me—but I’m afraid she won’t.’
Cold chills went down Mrs Chester’s spine. She sought and found Mr Parker Pyne, placidly reading a book in a sheltered corner.
‘You must do something! You must do something! My boy’s life will be ruined.’
Mr Parker Pyne was getting a little tired of Basil Chester’s life being ruined.
‘What can I do?’
‘Go and see this terrible creature. If necessary buy her off.’
‘That may come very expensive.’
‘I don’t care.’
‘It seems a pity. Still there are, possibly, other ways.’
She looked a question. He shook his head.
‘I’ll make no promises—but I’ll see what I can do. I have handled that kind before. By the way, not a word to Basil—that would be fatal.’
‘Of course not.’
Mr Parker Pyne returned from the Mariposa at midnight. Mrs Chester was sitting up for him.
‘Well?’ she demanded breathlessly.
His eyes twinkled.
‘The Señorita Dolores Ramona will leave Pollensa tomorrow morning and the island tomorrow night.’
‘Oh, Mr Parker Pyne! How did you manage it?’
‘It won’t cost a cent,’ said Mr Parker Pyne. Again his eyes twinkled. ‘I rather fancied I might have a hold over her—and I was right.’
‘You are wonderful. Nina Wycherley was quite right. You must let me know—er—your fees—’
Mr Parker Pyne held up a well-manicured hand.
‘Not a penny. It has been a pleasure. I hope all will go well. Of course the boy will be very upset at first when he finds she’s disappeared and left no address. Just go easy with him for a week or two.’
‘If only Betty will forgive him—’
‘She’ll forgive him all right. They’re a nice couple. By the way, I’m leaving tomorrow, too.’
‘Oh, Mr Parker Pyne, we shall miss you.’
‘Perhaps it’s just as well I should go before that boy of yours gets infatuated with yet a third girl.’
Mr Parker Pyne leaned over the rail of the steamer and looked at the lights of Palma. Beside him stood Dolores Ramona. He was saying appreciatively:
‘A very nice piece of work, Madeleine. I’m glad I wired you to come out. It’s odd when you’re such a quiet, stay-at-home girl really.’
Madeleine de Sara, alias Dolores Ramona, alias Maggie Sayers, said primly: ‘I’m glad you’re pleased, Mr Parker Pyne. It’s been a nice little change. I think I’ll go below now and get to bed before the boat starts. I’m such a bad sailor.’
A few minutes later a hand fell on Mr Parker Pyne’s shoulder. He turned to see Basil Chester.
‘Had to come and see you off, Mr Parker Pyne, and give you Betty’s love and her and my best thanks. It was a grand stunt of yours. Betty and Mother are as thick as thieves. Seemed a shame to deceive the old darling—but she was being difficult. Anyway it’s all right now. I must just be careful to keep up the annoyance stuff a couple of days longer. We’re no end grateful to you, Betty and I.’
‘I wish you every happiness,’ said Mr Parker Pyne.
‘Thanks.’
There was a pause, then Basil said with somewhat overdone carelessness:
‘Is Miss—Miss de Sara—anywhere about? I’d like to thank her, too.’
Mr Parker Pyne shot a keen glance at him.
He said:
‘I’m afraid Miss de Sara’s gone to bed.’
‘Oh, too bad—well, perhaps I’ll see her in London sometime.’
‘As a matter of fact she is going to America on business for me almost at once.’
‘Oh!’ Basil’s tone was blank. ‘Well,’ he said. ‘I’ll be getting along …’
Mr Parker Pyne smiled. On his way to his cabin he tapped on the door of Madeleine’s.
‘How are you, my dear? All right? Our young friend has been along. The usual slight attack of Madeleinitis. He�
�ll get over it in a day or two, but you are rather distracting.’
The Second Gong
Joan Ashby came out of her bedroom and stood a moment on the landing outside her door. She was half turning as if to go back into the room when, below her feet as it seemed, a gong boomed out.
Immediately Joan started forward almost at a run. So great was her hurry that at the top of the big staircase she collided with a young man arriving from the opposite direction.
‘Hullo, Joan! Why the wild hurry?’
‘Sorry, Harry. I didn’t see you.’
‘So I gathered,’ said Harry Dalehouse dryly. ‘But as I say, why the wild haste?’
‘It was the gong.’
‘I know. But it’s only the first gong.’
‘No, it’s the second.’
‘First.’
‘Second.’
Thus arguing they had been descending the stairs. They were now in the hall, where the butler, having replaced the gongstick, was advancing toward them at a grave and dignified pace.
‘It is the second,’ persisted Joan. ‘I know it is. Well, for one thing, look at the time.’
Harry Dalehouse glanced up at the grandfather clock.
‘Just twelve minutes past eight,’ he remarked. ‘Joan, I believe you’re right, but I never heard the first one. Digby,’ he addressed the butler, ‘is this the first gong or the second?’
‘The first, sir.’
‘At twelve minutes past eight? Digby, somebody will get the sack for this.’
A faint smile showed for a minute on the butler’s face.
‘Dinner is being served ten minutes later tonight, sir. The master’s orders.’
‘Incredible!’ cried Harry Dalehouse. ‘Tut, tut! Upon my word, things are coming to a pretty pass! Wonders will never cease. What ails my revered uncle?’
‘The seven o’clock train, sir, was half an hour late, and as—’ The butler broke off, as a sound like the crack of a whip was heard.
‘What on earth—’ said Harry. ‘Why, that sounded exactly like a shot.’
A dark, handsome man of thirty-five came out of the drawing room on their left.
‘What was that?’ he asked. ‘It sounded exactly like a shot.’
‘It must have been a car backfiring, sir,’ said the butler. ‘The road runs quite close to the house this side and the upstairs windows are open.’
‘Perhaps,’ said Joan doubtfully. ‘But that would be over there.’ She waved a hand to the right. ‘And I thought the noise came from here.’ She pointed to the left.
Problem at Pollensa Bay Page 2
