We were halfway through the football season, and he was single-handedly elevating the team to record breaking levels. He was also drawing attention from NFL scouts.
Watching him made me happy, because the last part of our senior year of high school had lifted a cloud from him. Football had been an outlet for his anger before. Now, he was passionate about it. He worked out even harder than before, and he took his practices seriously enough that he was studying playbooks before bed.
I had no illusions about my own future as a track star. I was passably average, and it was enough to help me pay for college. I still had to take a job waiting tables at a restaurant on campus to pay the rest. Cassian had tried a few times to help me financially, but eventually gave up.
I met him after his practice outside the school library. He wore a muscle shirt that gave a tantalizing view of his sculpted pecs and huge arms. I sank into his hug, kissing his neck and rubbing my nose against his chest until he laughed.
“So,” I said after we’d talked a few minutes. “I want you to meet my dad again. I know you knew him when we were kids, but this would be official. As my boyfriend.”
He quirked an eyebrow. “You’re sure?”
I nodded. “He behaved at graduation. He hasn’t been pestering me. And I checked in last week. He’s still holding his job in Silver Falls. If the rumors can be believed, he’s staying sober, too. I think it’s time I give him a chance to start making things right.”
Cassian kissed my nose. “I’ll play nice. But if he fucks with you—”
“I don’t need my black knight. Not for this. He’s my dad, and my problem.”
I could tell it tore Cassian up to accept that, but he nodded anyway. I loved that about him. He was almost comically protective—even to the point that he’d probably have to be banned from coming with me to doctor’s appointments for fear that he’d murder the first person to put their hands on me. Still, even through his over the top possessiveness of me, he cared more about my own growth. My well-being.
I decided to change the subject before he cracked a tooth from clenching his jaw too hard. “Did you hear about Clint and Zoe?”
“Was I supposed to?”
“They are going to start renting a place together off campus.”
“Good. I won’t need to worry about him changing his mind and coming after you again.”
I laughed. “I think I have more right to be worried about Sophie. At least the guys who liked me never turned full-blown Silence of the Lambs.”
“Sophie…” he shook his head, almost sadly. “Last I heard she was living off her daddy’s credit card and moping back in Silver Falls. Getting kicked out of school for distributing the video right before graduation really did a number on her.”
“I almost feel bad. I mean… I might do something crazy if you ever left me for another girl.”
He cupped my chin, kissing me. “Leaving you for another girl would be the crazy part. It’s not happening. Not ever.” He gripped the front of my shirt and yanked me into his chest with a half grin. It had become our little inside joke about the “gravity” conversation we’d had by the lake.
I feigned trying to peel myself from him but failing. “Just checking.”
Cassian kissed the top of my head, then wrapped his arms around me.
I stood there with him while waves of students walked around us. I closed my eyes and wondered if this was what true happiness felt like. Real happiness. The kind you could curl up inside and close your eyes, never worrying about tomorrow because you knew the here and now was enough.
I decided if this wasn’t it—if it wasn’t love and it wasn’t happiness, I didn’t care. Because all I needed was him. This. Now. Always and forever.
44
Epilogue - Cassian
Epilogue – Cassian
I never needed to wonder what it would feel like to be hit by a truck because I played running back. As I walked off the field and scanned the crowd for Charli, I was fairly sure I had a date with an ice bath coming soon. I could thank Charli for introducing me to the wonders of a shrivel-your-balls cold tub of water when soreness was at its worst.
I spotted my mom and Walter before I found Charli. Campus was a little under an hour from our home in Silver Falls, but the two of them trekked their asses out to every game, home and away. Did it soften my hatred for them? Maybe as much as a breeze might soften a rock. Give it a few thousand years, and yeah, some of the hard edges of my hate might wear off. But it was still going to be a while.
Forgiveness didn’t cost anything. I knew that. But I also knew my feelings for Charli hadn’t turned me into a good person. Yeah, I loved the shit out of her. I loved her enough that I’d fly a rocket into the sun just to piss it off for giving her a sunburn. That didn’t mean I magically stopped being an asshole in every other facet of my life. That’s just how it was.
Walter slapped my shoulder pads, beaming. “You nearly took that fucker’s head off in the second quarter.”
Despite myself, I grinned. Partly because Walter had admittedly loosened up a little over the past few months and dropped the “Champs” and “Sports” from his vocabulary. Also, partly because my mom was scowling at him like he’d just taken a dump on the field. “Yeah. He had balls to try an open field tackle when I have forty pounds on him. I’ll give him that.”
Once I shook them free, I managed to find Charli. She had invited her weird little friend, Marne, who was waddling beside her. Marne always reminded me of some strange forest creature you might shake out of a tree—all tangles and earth tones. She bulged her eyes at me like she always did, awkwardly saying nothing.
I grinned, then patted her head, which made her eyes go even wider. I scooped Charli into a tight hug, not caring that I probably smelled like sweat and grass. Charli kissed my neck, then let me put her down.
“You know,” I said. “I wasn’t sure if I was going to punch it in on that last drive. But I just had to think about how much fun it was last time I was in that endzone, and I found the drive to do it.”
Charli’s cheeks went red.
Marne looked at her in open disgust. “Again, Charli? At least tell me nobody filmed it this time.”
“Not that we know of,” she said quietly.
After I showered and changed, I drove with Charli back to Silver Falls. The plan was to meet Tristan, Kennedy, Logan, and Gage at Dead Ringers for old time’s sake.
Logan was already getting himself placed on mock drafts for NFL teams with the way he was playing at NC State. Gage, despite being a hell of player, decided to chase academics and pass on the scholarship he had waiting. He’d gone to Harvard to study creative writing. Tristan had been through a hell storm to end his senior year, which meant he missed out on a scholarship and got into The University of Maine on his grades alone.
The four of us “Greeks,” as the dorks at school liked to call us, still kept as close as we could despite the distance. It was a complicated dynamic, but somehow, we all knew it was a brotherhood for life. We’d always keep finding our way back to each other, like its own version of the gravity that kept me glued to Charli.
Logan, Tristan, and Kennedy were waiting at Dead Ringers when we showed up. I had my arm around Charli’s waist, thinking for about the thousandth time how much I loved the way she felt so tiny in my arms.
I frowned as we sat down. “Why do you all look so fucking grim? Is it the freshmen twenty I put on?”
Charli pinched my stomach, which was as ripped as ever. “I don’t think the freshman twenty means twenty pounds of muscle, you meat head.”
Tristan leaned forward on the table, eyebrows drawn. “It’s about Gage…”
For the next few minutes, it felt like the lights dimmed in the diner while Tristan spoke. I barely heard the words. All I knew was that Gage, who had always seemed like the least burdened of the four of us, wasn’t going to be the same.
I squeezed Charli’s hand and saw the pain on her face for him—for me. She kn
ew we were all bound together, and she knew when one of us bled, we all did.
THE END
Want more like this? Ruthless Love is the first book in the series. It follows Tristan and Kennedy. He was my devil in a letterman jacket. Eyes cold as ice and lips made for cruel kisses. He could’ve had anything he wanted, but somehow, all he wanted was me… Click here to read>>
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Savage Love Page 20
