Unintended Heroes

by Paul Vayro

Chapter Thirty Four

  "You do know we're no longer walking in a straight line?" Dandara had been waiting to see if Brick would realise his directional error. He'd assumed the lead role on their foray towards the village of non-movement.

  "We're following a direction not a geometric exactity."

  "You can't just make up words in the hope it will prove your point." Dandara didn't know if exactity was a word either, but she knew how to sound more confident about it than Brick.

  "Of course you can make up words. Nobody had a problem with that dictionary fella doing it."

  "And what was the point he was trying to make?" Dandara had a firm grip on the debate.

  "That if you write things down and make it look official everybody will assume it to be the truth. Is that Chris?" Brick diverted attention towards a shadowy, man like blob hurtling through the air and heading in their direction.

  As the figure grew the face of Chris could clearly be seen. It grinned as he rode a souped-up pogo stick, clearing fifty feet with each bound. The nearer Chris came the distance he cleared lessened, until he gently hopped amongst them.

  "I apologise for thy absence. Thou time away stretched further than I could foretell. Thon ideas were many upon reaching thy abode. Save to lose them I noted what I could. The rest will return another day." Chris skipped from his toy. Spiritwind held out a hand to hold it steady. Inspecting the device confirmed it was a pogo stick, only with an added myriad of levers and pulleys wound together with cogs and thread. A mirror could be seen amongst the perfectly organised clutter.

  "Nice pogo stick." Spiritwind could only think of one thing to say.

  "Again you know of the labels to my inventions. Are you spies?" Chris' confusion grew at the same rate as his theorising.

  "We are in fact the complete opposite." Brick answered proudly.

  "Thee means thon openly refuses to pry within another's business?" Chris had nothing but a literal interpretation.

  "Not quite that opposite."

  "There be degrees of opposite? I'd never thought." Brick prepared to speak, only for his words to be stolen by his own thoughts. He stood open mouthed, pondering. Spiritwind interjected.

  "We're from a planet very similar to yours where all these things have already been invented."

  "So your eyes have already beheld my life's works? They are not the original thoughts yon imagined?" Chris deflated slightly.

  "No, but that doesn't take anything away from you. Just because the wheel or pogo stick has been invented time and time again across the universe it doesn't make it any less original for each person that does it. You were the one that created it in this time and place. The fact it always gets invented proves it must be a great idea. So if anything it's proof that your ideas are really good." Spiritwind felt pleased the speech had ended with a positive twist.

  "So the pogo stick lies already, beyond the clouds?" Chris looked towards the sky wistfully.

  "That is one way of putting it. Although this is by far the best one I've ever seen." Spiritwind twizzled the contraption in his hands. It felt so light and perfectly balanced.

  "What about yon car?"

  "Yep."

  "Buttons, farming, chips, sewer works, electricity, cartoons, plumbing, thimbles, lollipops?"

  "Yep. Every one." Spiritwind contemplated trying the pogo.

  "Did you invent all those things?" Brick had concluded his thoughts on opposite. He decided Chris was probably right.

  "For all the worth it seems." Chris had little enthusiasm for his reply.

  "It's very unusual for one person to come up with all that. It usually takes several brilliant men centuries of baby steps. Obviously I invent countless things every day, but I'm strictly an ideas man and don't usually have the time to actually build my designs. I usually don't even get time to draw them, but you do the lot. Maybe we should team up?"

  "Why? So the world can all have a little hanky attached to their sock to keep their hands clean at mealtimes?" Spiritwind mocked his friend as he wondered how best to mount the pogo stick.

  "Not just mealtimes." Brick rebuffed the mockery. "The sock hanky is useful for keeping fingers clean throughout the day from a multitude of messy chores. And it cleans itself when washed with the sock. And you get a fresh one each day. It's revolutionary. All the great revolutionary ideas are mocked at the start. I'll just remind you of your meagre faith when the Queen herself is wearing them."

  "You speak of many fellow inventors upon your home orb? Thee would relish the time yon could spend conversing with the like. My folk only discuss the merits of rest and sleep, if that."

  "Then feel free to converse. As I said, I'm a great inventor." Brick stood in his best inventor pose. It looked more like a sleepy security guard with a slipped disc.

  "Thou hast observed the very blocks that build all that be and theorised thon atom. One considers thon manipulation of such matter could yield any one material from another, such as wood from gold. How far hast thon research on said topic ran? Perhaps thy key to further progress lies within you."

  "About this village." Brick put his arm around Chris and walked ahead. He whispered as they went. "We'll save all this inventor type chat for later. Don't want to bore everyone with our high brow technical jargon."

  "As socially considerate as thon be brilliant." Chris welcomed the rebuttal.

  "I'd love to hear your theories on quantum engineering, Brick." Dandara couldn't hide the smirk as she joined in.

  "She's just too polite for her own good Chris. Let us continue with the mission." Brick ushered Chris to lead the way as everyone meandered behind.

  Spiritwind had been playing with the pogo stick. After brief analysis he lined up the transportation device and jumped. Landing both feet on the intended foot plates the stick took off, flinging Spiritwind twenty feet into the air, over the heads of the group and just in front of Brick and Chris. The bald hero landed with a stumbling run, the stick fifteen feet ahead. Turning the fall into a jog Spiritwind retrieved the pogo from the floor and returned it to its owner.

  "It's good that Chris."

  "My thanks are full."

  "Baguette?" Spiritwind calmed himself with a sandwich.

  "Thou must decline, although where thon food doth store perplexes me."

  "Don't worry about it. Just understand it's there when needed. Could I ask you something?" Spiritwind didn't wait for permission. "If you say everyone else spends their days sitting around what makes you so different?"

  "Mon days of rest are far from these times. Since childhood passed thou cannot find peace in idleness. It is a tale that still quakes thy bones, but with it I will regale thee."

  "You don't have to. I don't want to upset you."

  Chris launched straight into story mode. "T'was a day as any other. Mon fair mother, Necessity, placed thee on thou bag of beans and lay her own head down for an after sleep doze. Gazing up into the void of blue above, an object of great speed dissected thy vision. White and ball like in nature, I paid it little care and continued with thy nap...." Chris appeared taken aback by emotion.

  "Honestly if it's too painful you can just give me the edited version." Spiritwind didn't want to have to handle a crying man, especially a stranger.

  "The time that passed is not within thy knowledge, but as mon mind came round the sound of metal approached, a sound thee shall never erase. Staring up at the blue the colour left my vision, obscured by a helmet of curious nature. The slats offered nothing but the darkest night, a nothing that grew with intrigue and fear. My mind whispered to avert thy gaze but something more powerful prevented thee. Thy entirety fell into doubt and suspicion, overwhelmed by yon thought of danger within everything. Each action within thy thoughts became a potential accident, traumatic experience, just waiting for thy arrival. Safety left thon mind that day, stolen by irrational fear."

  Chris bit his knuckle. It didn't change anything. "Thon helmet cackled before departing my view, leaving behind terror in mon tiny skull.
Yon stood with a panic infecting thy mind with a potency only witchcraft could explain, or an easily explained scientific process that was yet to be clear. For many days thee cowered, fearful of life itself, until a bird up yonder distracted thee. How doth such a thing remain within the blue? Defying.....gravity? What be this gravity thon mind throws forth? A force of attraction holding the universe in balance perhaps? Thon thoughts appeared from behind nothing, flooding all that I am, but soothing the terror. Yon so I remain, distracted by endless streams of queries and answers mon mind keeps not where I know. Not 'til thee invents yon coping strategies within a field mon shall name.....mind wondering, or psychology?" The thought could be seen appearing as he spoke.

  "That is sad." Spiritwind popped a cracker in his mouth. The tale had evoked his own theory as to what may be going on. His time spent with They had taught him much of the workings of the universe, and how to always win on fruit machines with nothing more than a cheeky grin. "Is it possible, and I'm ready to be wrong, that all the inventive energy of the planet has lay dormant, unable to be released in small doses on the usual hosts that would use it. And when it saw you finally questioning something it all made a rush towards you and has been doing ever since? Just a thought."

  "Yon believes thee to be a tool for the planet's progression?"

  "Why not? The human race needs things inventing constantly in order to evolve. It would appear there's a huge backlog here and you've been given the task of clearing up."

  "Perhaps thy purpose is more than the one who will not sit. Thank you man of smooth head for thy input." Chris smiled his favourite smile, then paused and turned to the group. "Our destiny lies close. Beyond thy hill to be precise. Yon must warn thee to beware the feelings of lethargy which will entice you to sit, or even lye. Thou should resist with all might for standing will be nigh on impossible should yon succumb. Explore freely and speak at will. My apologies are sincere for mon peers slothful nature."

  "What shall we do about The Magwanvu and Bobby? Do we have any human suits to disguise them?" Dandara remembered the minor admin side of the Hero's Council concerning those whose form didn't match Earthlings.

  "Why would thou wish to conceal such wonder?" Chris was all for difference, as his name suggested.

  "We don't want to arouse suspicion amongst the residents. They may ask questions, call the local news. I don't want to end up as a blurry shot from a wobbly vantage point at the end of this evening's bulletin." Dandara didn't look her best under blurry circumstances.

  "I envy thy hope, but fear not. Thon people have disposed of suspicion for fear of effort. Barely an eyebrow would raise at the sight of giant lizards doing battle upon thy houses. Yon shall be safe."

  "You mean dinosaurs?" Brick attempted further education.

  "Dinosaurs? T'is a word befitting such size and ferocity. Come Brick. Your wisdom should spill further into thy ears."

  Heroic, coincidental circumstance replaced the need for any improvisation as Brick turned smugly and skipped towards Chris at the front. The rest of the group were unsure what to expect, but stepped forward in order to turn a mystery into an experience.