Sylvia would be thrilled for her. So would Caleb, and she’d get to see Isaac. It was early enough the boy would still be awake. She didn’t want to interrupt their supper or the quiet time they spent together.
Sighing, she started toward Sylvia’s house, stopping when Caleb’s door opened, Isaac running outside. Stepping into the shadows, she watched the little boy jump down the steps to launch himself into a pile of freshly fallen snow. Giggles tightened her throat as deep masculine laughter caught her attention.
Caleb stood on the small porch, hands in his pockets as he watched his son toss snow everywhere. He hadn’t seen May on the other side of the narrow street. She took the time to watch father and son talk as Isaac played, joy on both their faces.
“May!”
She jerked at her name coming from Isaac. Seeing the look of surprise on Caleb’s face, she stepped from the shadows. A smile lit her face.
“Hello, Isaac.” Swallowing, she shifted her gaze. “Caleb.”
Taking the steps to the street, Caleb stood in front of her, searching her face. “What are you doing here, May?” He must’ve seen the flash of pain. Cupping her face in both hands, he leaned down, brushing a kiss across her lips. “It doesn’t matter. I’m just glad to see you. Come on. Let’s go inside.” He put an arm over her shoulders, guiding her up the steps, stopping at the door. “Time to get into the house, Isaac.”
After some grumbling, his son stomped up the steps. Waiting as Caleb brushed the snow from his clothes, Isaac bounded inside, shrugging out of his coat and mittens before hurrying to his box of toys.
“The box is almost full.” May walked toward where Isaac sat on the floor, taking out several toys.
“The Pelletiers brought some. Suzanne and Nick also contributed, as did Lena and Gabe. I’m warming up stew. Can you stay and have supper with us?”
Her body relaxed at the invitation. She should return to the boardinghouse, have supper alone, then go to bed.
“I’d love to stay.” Placing her coat on a hook by the door, she joined Caleb in the kitchen. “How can I help?”
“We’re just having stew and biscuits. You could get the plates and flatware.”
She didn’t have to ask where he kept them. After setting the table, she walked over to kneel next to Isaac. “What are you building?”
He didn’t look up. “A church.”
She shot a look at Caleb, meeting his interested gaze.
“Papa building church.”
“Yes, he is. And he’s doing a very good job. It’s going to be beautiful.” She brushed a strand of hair from Isaac’s forehead. “Yours is also going to be beautiful.”
He nodded, continuing to focus on the blocks.
“Supper is ready.” Caleb set the pot on the table, along with a bowl filled with biscuits.
May stood, holding out her hand to Isaac. “Time to eat.”
Dropping the block, he stood, grasping May’s hand. It only took a few steps to get to the table. Taking seats, they bowed their heads while Caleb said a prayer, Isaac whispering the words. He truly was a miniature of his father.
Caleb filled each plate, adding a biscuit before handing one to May and another to Isaac. Grabbing a plate for himself, he scooped up a large helping of stew. After a minute, he looked at May.
“How did the tasting go?”
She grinned, setting her fork down. “It went very well. In fact, much better than I hoped.”
“Tell me.”
She explained what happened, finishing with her changed hours. “So I’ll work Wednesdays, Fridays, and Saturdays until late afternoon, then my regular hours on Thursdays.”
His eyes widened. “So you won’t be working Sundays, Mondays, and Tuesdays?”
“Yes. Isn’t it wonderful?”
As May spoke, Caleb watched the joy on her face, the way her body thrummed at the opportunity, his heart squeezing. She had a talent, and now she had the chance to use it. He couldn’t be more proud of her.
“Yes, May, it’s wonderful news. You’re quite talented. I’m very happy for you.” Warmth spread through him at seeing her eyes sparkle at his compliment.
“They’ll be on the menu this Friday, so I’ll need to arrive extra early. I want everything to be perfect.”
“I’m sure they will be, sweetheart.” Finishing his meal, he glanced at Isaac’s empty plate. “Would you like some more, son?”
Isaac nodded, lifting his plate. Caleb put a small amount in the middle, placing one more biscuit beside the stew. Setting down the spoon, he sat back, his gaze moving to May.
“I’ll be putting Isaac to bed after supper. Do you have time to stay?”
She shifted in her seat. “I probably should—”
“I want to tell you about my past,” he interrupted, his eyes filled with worry.
Lips parting, her brows lifted. “All right.”
He relaxed, knowing the sense of peace wouldn’t last long. Once she heard his story, there was an excellent chance she’d leave and their time together would be over.
May couldn’t calm the unease knotting inside her. Back rigid, hands clasped in her lap, she sat on the edge of the sofa, waiting as Caleb paced back and forth. She didn’t know how long she sat there before he spoke.
“My father and I didn’t agree on my decision to fight for the Union.” Caleb told her how he’d left the family home after a horrible argument with his father and joined the Union, fighting in more battles than he could remember. He told of the letters he’d sent, never receiving a reply.
Caleb admitted the lack of correspondence from his family was what made him decide to ride west to Austin, becoming a Texas Ranger. Stopping his pacing, he looked at May.
“That’s where I met Regina.”
May’s face scrunched into a frown. “Regina?”
“My fiancée.”
A gasp broke through May’s lips. Sitting on a chair beside the sofa, Caleb massaged the back of his neck.
“Like you, Regina was beautiful and full of life. Her family was one of the wealthiest in Austin, yet she made friends with everyone. I don’t believe anyone was a stranger to Regina. She loved everyone, and they loved her.”
“And you loved her.”
“Yes, May. I loved Regina very much.”
She did her best to shove aside the ache at his admission. “What happened?”
Closing his eyes, images of that night came back as clear as if it had happened yesterday. Sucking in a shaky breath, he gazed across the room. “She got caught in the cross fire between three brothers and a couple other men.”
May placed a hand over her mouth. The pain on his face shot to her heart.
“By the time I got to her, she was gone. One minute Regina was running toward me, her eyes glistening in excitement, as if she couldn’t wait to tell me something. The next, she was dead.” His voice broke on the last.
“I’m so very sorry, Caleb. I can’t imagine what you went through after losing her.”
Scrubbing a hand down his face, Caleb shook his head. “I didn’t handle her death well. For a while, I took the most dangerous assignments, tracking the worst killers. My captain told me he thought I had a death wish.” He lifted a shoulder. “Maybe he was right. Life didn’t hold any meaning for me anymore.”
Standing, he went to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Pouring a glass, he tossed it back, letting the amber liquid burn down his throat. Setting down the glass, he walked back toward May, sitting on the chair. Leaning forward, he rested his arms on his legs, staring at the floor.
“Regina’s good friend was a saloon girl. They were as close as sisters. The rich rancher’s daughter and a young woman with no family.”
“Sadie,” she whispered.
With a quick glance up, Caleb nodded, returning his gaze to the floor. “I drank a lot, but couldn’t kill the pain. One night, Sadie joined me at the bar. She missed Regina almost as much as I did. I don’t recall how it happened, but I ended up in her bed. It wa
s the first good sleep I’d gotten since Regina’s death. After that, I returned at least once a week. We never spoke of love. Each of us needed something, and we were able to find it in bed.” He looked up in time to see her wince. “If this is too difficult, I won’t say more.”
Taking a few slow breaths, she shook her head. “No. I want to hear it all.”
“All right.” He stood, walking to the window, staring out at the black night. “I don’t know how long Sadie and I went on like that. Maybe a year. She helped me through the grief, and I hope I helped her. I’d planned to stay in Austin, try to build a life. One day, I saw wanted posters on the men who’d killed Regina. My captain refused to give me the assignment to hunt them down.”
Turning back to her, he leaned against the wall, crossing his arms. “I became a bounty hunter, leaving Austin without telling Sadie goodbye. Not even a damn goodbye,” he grated out, his voice full of self-loathing. Caleb shook his head, as if still trying to understand how he could’ve left the woman who’d helped him through the worst time of his life.
“I tracked down and killed two of them.” Dropping his arms, he ran a hand through his hair. “I didn’t give them a chance, May. The two were in a saloon, playing cards. I walked in, got their attention, and shot them. They were cold-blooded killings and I’ve never felt the slightest remorse. I stayed long enough to clear the deaths with the local sheriff, then rode out. For months, I tracked the third man, the one whose bullet killed Regina. I never found him.”
Blowing out a breath, he pushed away from the wall. “I tracked him to South Pass City in Wyoming, then lost the trail. Instead of riding back to Austin, I rode north. Another decision I’ll always regret.”
Her face a mask, May nodded. “Because then you would’ve learned about Sadie being pregnant.”
“Yes,” he ground out.
Sitting down again, he sighed. “Mack and I served under Gabe during the war. I learned he’d gone to Splendor and decided to see what it was like. My money had run out and I needed work. Gabe hired me.” His tortured eyes met hers. “You know the rest.”
Pulling her gaze from his, she stared straight ahead, throat so tight she couldn’t speak. He’d been through so much. Being shunned by his own family, the death of his fiancée, killing two men without a hint of remorse, and leaving Sadie behind. The woman who’d cared for him, helped him heal after Regina’s death, had no way of finding him. He’d left her alone with no one to turn to. Her brows drew together.
“How did the woman who brought Isaac learn you lived in Splendor?”
“My captain. I let him know where I ended up. He paid the woman to escort Isaac to me. The man had always been good to me.”
“So had Sadie.” The words came out without thought. She wanted to take them back, yet couldn’t. They were the truth.
Misery contorted his face. “Yes, she did. And I left her alone, with no one to depend on. I never even sent her one damn telegram.” Pinching the bridge of his nose, he looked at her. “What kind of man does that to a woman who’d been nothing but kind and giving?”
Pushing up from the chair, he faced her. “Now you know why I’m not suitable for a fine woman like you, May.”
Tearing her gaze from his, she rubbed her forehead, trying to make sense of all she’d learned. “I don’t know what to think right now, Caleb. You’ve been through so much.”
“And I’ve made a mess of most everything.”
“No. You did what you thought was right at the time. It’s always easy to look back and criticize our past actions.”
“I hurt people I loved.”
His scornful tone ignited May’s anger. She stood, stepping next to him.
“We all hurt people we love.”
“You don’t. Regina didn’t, and neither did Sadie.”
Eyes widening, she took in his meaning. “Sadie loved you?”
Jaw tightening, he nodded. “Yes.”
She couldn’t move, could hardly breathe. “Did you love her?”
Drawing in a ragged breath, he shook his head. “I couldn’t. Not after Regina.”
“I see.” But she didn’t.
The woman who bore him a son loved Caleb, yet he’d left Sadie behind without a backward glance. Granted, he knew nothing of Isaac. Still, she’d professed to loving him, brought him back to life after Regina’s death. Even if he couldn’t return her love, didn’t she mean enough for him to spare a few minutes for a farewell? May swallowed the pain she felt at the young woman’s plight.
Placing a hand on her chest, she pressed, hoping to ease the ache.
Caleb watched the play of emotions on May’s face, feeling like the worst kind of scoundrel.
“I should go.” She didn’t look at him as she slipped into her coat and bonnet. “Thank you for supper.”
Stepping in front of her, he placed his hands on her shoulders. “I’ll understand if you want to call off the courtship. I wouldn’t hold any hard feelings toward you.”
She lifted her face, staring into eyes full of misery and pain. “I don’t know what I want right now, Caleb. There is much I have to think about. Can you allow me time to consider all I’ve learned?”
A slight rush of relief washed over him. “As much time as you need, May.” He leaned down, placing a chaste kiss on her cheek. “May I still accompany you to church on Sunday?”
She thought a moment, slowly shaking her head. “I’m sorry, but I just don’t know.”
He gave a curt nod. “I understand.” Standing aside, he opened the door. “No matter your decision, I hope we can remain friends.”
So do I, she thought, but the words stuck in her throat. “Good night, Caleb.”
Watching her hurry into the night, he let out a defeated breath. A pain he hadn’t felt since losing Regina slashed through his chest, stalling his breath. Closing the door, he leaned against it, confusion crowding his thoughts.
He had so many regrets, and there wasn’t one he could fix. Entering his room, Caleb lowered himself onto the bed. Until tonight, he didn’t realize the full depth of his feelings for May, how much he cared about her, needed her in his life.
Falling back on the bed, he closed his eyes. Images of his parents, Regina lying dead in his arms, Sadie opening her heart to him, and the men he’d killed flashed across his mind.
Right now, though, the one haunting him most was the disillusionment and pain in May’s eyes as she rushed out the door.
Chapter Twelve
“Are you sure you don’t want to ride out to the Pelletier ranch with May and me?” Dilly picked up his hat, settling it on his head. “I’m told they breed the best horse stock in all of Montana.”
Pauline’s nose scrunched. “Maybe another time, dear. I thought to visit the millinery and general store today.”
Dilly didn’t argue. He still hadn’t forgiven her for the offensive comments about his deceased wife. This trip had shown him another side of Pauline, and he didn’t like what he’d seen or heard from her.
When they’d met, he hadn’t felt a whit of attraction to the widow. Pauline had been persistent, showing up at social events he attended, inviting him to accompany her to various parties and soirees. She’d been attentive, almost fawning in her efforts to win him. Over time, he’d weakened, marrying the woman more for companionship than any real affection.
Her courteous manner had deteriorated on the trip west and hadn’t improved since arriving in Splendor. The unexpected outburst in front of his friends at the Eagle’s Nest had stunned him, and the sour feeling in the pit of his stomach hadn’t eased.
“May and I will be gone most of the day. Should I invite Oliver?”
“I’d prefer he stay in town with me, Dilly. Besides, you know he doesn’t care at all for horses.”
Yes, he did know of his stepson’s aversion to anything with four legs. He’d been raised a city dandy, and no matter how Dilly tried to open his mind to other activities, Oliver refused his efforts.
“Fine. Well, I�
��m off to meet May.” He shot her a cursory glance before leaving their room. Reaching the lobby, a broad grin spread across his face. Walter and Ernst stood near the door.
“If you don’t mind, we’ll be riding along with you.” Ernst slapped his riding gloves against his thighs. “It’s been too long since I’ve been to the Pelletier ranch.”
Dilly shook both their hands. “It’s a grand idea. May will also be coming.”
“Wonderful.” Walter stepped outside, waiting until the other two joined him before the three walked down the steps. “They’re making good progress with the church.”
Over the last few days, the walls and roof had been completed, a few of the windows installed. The other openings would be covered until more windows arrived from Big Pine.
Dilly chuckled. “Yes, they are. I do have to say, it was a different experience having the service at the Dixie yesterday. I quite enjoyed it.”
“My guess is you enjoyed the scenery upstairs as opposed to Reverend Paige’s message.” Walter referred to the saloon ladies who’d lined the upstairs railing, listening to the sermon.
Dilly cleared his throat. “They were a nice distraction.”
The three continued down the boardwalk toward Noah’s livery. May stood outside, tugging her coat around her.
The snow had stopped Saturday, giving the town a welcome reprieve. It wouldn’t be an easy ride, but it wouldn’t be as difficult as they’d expected.
“Here’s your horse and your father’s.” Noah handed May two sets of reins. “I’ll get the other two.”
“Good morning, May.” Dilly’s voice boomed across the open expanse in front of the livery. Opening his arms, he encircled her in a tight embrace. “I’m glad you decided to come with us.”
May nodded against his chest, shooting a furtive glance toward the jail before stepping away. She hadn’t spoken to Caleb since the night he’d confessed his past, and she missed him terribly.
At church yesterday, he and Isaac had sat with Isabella and Travis on one side, Gabe’s sister, Nora, and her husband, Wyatt Jackson, on the other. May had taken a seat across the room with Sylvia, Mack, and Sylvia’s brother, Dom Lucero. When church ended, she’d walked out on Dom’s arm, scanning the boardwalk and street, but hadn’t found Caleb. Her heart still ached at the pain she’d seen on his face when she left his house the previous week.
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