Body Switches

by Barbara G. Tarn

  "I'm glad you're in such a sociable mood," he managed to tell her at some point.

  "Oh, I can be a very entertaining fellow, I mean, woman," she answered with a shrug.

  "Really?" He chuckled. "Since when?"

  "Since... I understood you needed me to play this part! How am I doing?"

  "You're doing great. You're even dealing with this small crowd."

  "May I have a prize, then?" She pleaded, pulling him to her.

  He stiffened at the unexpected public display of affection. "Not here, and not now," he snapped, jarred.

  "Of course not!" She pulled back. "But... later?" She batted her eyelids with a propitiatory smile.

  "I'll see what I can do," he answered, averting his eyes.

  That was so... not her! What was going on in her head? He really hoped she hadn't gone crazy while trying to please him. Hopefully she was just playing a part, although he had never seen her playing one for so long. Still, sometimes it felt a little like a parody, so maybe it was a show she was doing for his career... Where she had found the courage, he had no idea, but he was very proud of her.

  ***

  Sebastian looked tired and Marian felt sorry for him. The dinner had been nightmarish for her because, as she imagined, Luke had wondered what was wrong with "him".

  She watched Sebastian undress and admired his toned body. Women would really miss such a yummy man. She looked under the pillow but couldn't find any pajamas, so she turned her back on Sebastian and took her clothes off, quickly sliding under the bed sheets and keeping on the underwear.

  "Since when are you shy?" Sebastian asked, amused.

  "I'm in a phase..." she answered vaguely.

  Sebastian sighed. "What is it this time?"

  "I'm a woman."

  "There's still a lot of work to do on that. And not only on your body."

  "What do you mean?"

  "Well, you're usually lunatic enough, but I don't think this will make a woman out of you yet."

  "Depends on the woman, I guess," she grumbled.

  "You're probably right." He smiled. "You're unusually quiet tonight, is something bothering you?"

  "Do you love me?"

  "Of course I do. Come here."

  He hugged her and kissed her, but she pulled back.

  "I'm sorry, I can't." She couldn't look him in the eyes. "Not tonight."

  Sebastian sighed and let her go. "Now you just sound like my ex-wife."

  "I'm sorry."

  Sebastian smiled. "Good night, Johnny." He lightly kissed her cheek and switched off the light.

  Marian turned her back on him, gulping. He was gorgeous, but she couldn't cheat on Chris. She hoped Johnny would be as considerate while in her body. He must have something good if Sebastian loved him – it couldn't be only youth and good looks. And even if his brain was in his dick, being dickless should make him different... or was it something that wasn't physical?

  No matter how much she might want Sebastian, she couldn't handle her male body yet. She couldn't feel it or understand it (going to pee had been interesting indeed), so she hoped Johnny would be as embarrassed as she was and leave Chris alone.

  She eventually fell asleep but her internal alarm clock woke her up at the usual time. She found herself cuddled against Sebastian and it felt good. But he wasn't Chris, so she dutifully pulled back, sitting on the bed.

  Sebastian, his room, his house. She hadn't gone back to her body. The nightmare continued. She sighed.

  Sebastian's alarm clock went off and she was faster at switching it off. Sebastian stared at her, drowsy but surprised.

  "You're up already? Again?"

  "Can I use the bathroom?" she asked quickly. No matter what body she had, she needed to pee as soon as she woke up.

  "Sure," he answered puzzled.

  She rushed to the bathroom, then left it free for him. She went to the kitchen, pondering what to do next, and automatically made coffee and a couple of toasted slices of bread.

  Sebastian arrived while she was buttering the toast, clearly ready to go to work, and poured himself some coffee.

  She offered him the toasts.

  "What's this?" he asked, amused.

  "Uhm... toasted bread?" She had forgotten to ask Johnny what kind of breakfast they had.

  "You know I don't eat this early," Sebastian replied.

  He finished his coffee, lightly kissed her cheek and left. "See you tonight! Behave yourself!"

  "Sure, bye!"

  Marian stared at the toasts and threw them away.

  "Right, what am I doing, you're not Chris," she grumbled, putting down the empty plate with a shaky hand.

  She drank her own coffee, thinking she had something in common with Sebastian. Her stomach refused breakfast this early in the morning, and, apparently, so did his. They'd made a perfect no-breakfast-thank-you couple.

  She washed the mugs and the plate, and went back to the bedroom to dress. She made the bed and went downstairs to the living room. She saw a laptop and switched it on, searching on Google for a solution to possession or body switching.

  Rosa came in, grumbled a greeting and went upstairs. Marian ignored her, too taken by her research.

  Then Rosa came back, looking puzzled. "The bed is already made."

  She shrugged. "Yeah, I did it, why?"

  Rose went into the kitchen and came back immediately. "No breakfast?" she asked, her fists on her hips.

  "It takes five seconds to wash two mugs."

  Rosa looked even more perplexed, but went back to the kitchen. Marian barely heard her when she left. The plethora of body-swap spells looked ludicrous. Still, she had to try at least one.

  She found candles and sat on the carpet, with the laptop on the couch behind her. She checked the instructions again.

  "Back to my body!" she said, closing her eyes and imagining her own body. She opened her eyes and snapped her fingers three times. Nothing happened. Luckily the web-page said it "doesn't work all the time" – why should it?

  Maybe she wasn't believing it enough. She wasn't hoping enough. She tried again, concentrating harder. She prayed to switch back to the body God had given her at her birth. Nothing. And she didn't feel exhilarated, like the seventeen-year-old boy who has switched bodies with his nineteen-year-old girlfriend.

  Probably Johnny was quite happy to have a vagina, boobs and a tight ass. Oh, yeah, her boobs were too small for Johnny's tastes. But his reaction sounded very much like the seventeen-year-old boy. Not that he was much older. She wondered how the girlfriend felt.

  At least the Wiccans didn't do it. Who did, though? And who could do the counter-spell? Should she look for a voodoo priest? Pity there was no such tradition in her hometown...

  Maybe eventually, she would switch back, she only had to wait... be patient...

  ***

  Chris was quite nervous – the party had gone well, and afterward Marian had showed more sexual initiative than ever. Pity in the morning she had refused to get out of bed and pretended not to remember her doctor's number. She had been so weird for the past twenty-four hours that he wondered what was going on. Was she really sick? Had her sanity suddenly snapped? She wasn't playing a part anymore, as she was different even at home. What was going on?

  Thank God the weekend was close now and they could discuss it and figure it out.

  A knock on the door of his office and she came in with two take-away coffees, dressed weird - having put together two items that didn't belong in a failed attempt to look fashionable – and wearing light makeup.

  "Hello, honey," she grinned, locking the office door behind her.

  "Mar, what are you doing here?" he demanded, jarred.

  She came forward. "I was missing you so much... I couldn't even remember if you wanted your coffee black or with cream, so I took one of each."

  She offered both coffees.

  "Black," he answered without thinking, staring puzzled at her.

  "Perfect, I'll have the other," she b
eamed. She checked which was which and offered one of the cups. "Black coffee, sir."

  "Thanks." He took it, wondering what made her so talkative at 9.30am. "I thought you were sick."

  "I felt guilty for not making any breakfast for you," she purred.

  She pushed away the coffees and pulled up her skirt, straddling his legs and undoing his pants.

  "What are you doing?" he protested.

  "What does it look like I'm doing?" she whispered in his ear, licking and sucking his lobe.

  "Marian, please, if someone comes in..."

  "I told your secretary I wouldn't be long, and nobody should disturb us. And I locked the door, just in case."

  He glanced at the door, but couldn't relax as she moved to ride him with a sigh of pleasure.

  "You're not wearing any underwear?" he asked, both shocked and aroused by her bold new approach on sex.

  "We're in a hurry, aren't we?" she panted.

  "Wait, I don't have protection!"

  "Who cares?"

  She closed his mouth with hers. He gave up any resistance. He loved his wife and was glad of her sudden initiative, but at the same time he was worried because Marian wasn't herself anymore. And he wasn't sure he liked the "new" Marian in spite of everything.

  4.

  Marian rang her own doorbell without much hope. But Johnny was in.

  "Oh, hi. What's up?"

  "I see you got another day off," she said bluntly. She stepped into her own apartment and was appalled by the mess in the bedroom – bed still undone, shopping bags on the ground, and Johnny was painting her nails bright red!

  "Well, you're having mine, so I decided to take one more too," Johnny shrugged, slumping on the unmade bed.

  "Fine." She turned to stare at him with stern determination. "We're still switched. Shall we discuss how to organize our lives?"

  "Oh, sure." Johnny enthused. "I bought you new clothes and..."

  "That's not the point!" she snapped. "I don't need a new wardrobe."

  "I do!" Johnny pouted. "This body definitely lacked one! If Doris could see me now, she'd be dead jealous!" Johnny picked up the shopping bags and started rummaging through them.

  "Who's Doris?" Marian demanded.

  "A friend of mine. Look at this..." Johnny showed a brightly colored Chanel dress.

  Marian ignored it. "Male or female?"

  "Technically male. But she has more breasts than you." Johnny stared lovingly at the dress.

  "Thanks," Marian snapped. "How about Luke, how do I deal with him?"

  "Oh, don't worry about Luke, I'll take care of him." Johnny put down the dress and rummaged again, showing a silk blouse as if it were a trophy.

  "He already called twice," Marian handed him the offending cell phone. "I don't know what to tell him!"

  "I said I'll take care of him," Johnny replied impatiently, ignoring the phone. "Don't you love these?" He showed high-heel shoes and sexy lingerie.

  "No, I don't like any of that! And you don't need all that stuff!"

  "I do, I wanna be an elegant woman!"

  "My credit card bills will kill me," she grumbled, refraining from slapping him.

  "It's my credit card now," he replied defensively.

  "So you think we're stuck like this, huh?"

  "Yes, and I'm sure you'll love it as much as I do!"

  "I doubt it," she said, sarcastic, crossing her arms on her chest. "How can you step into somebody else's life so easily?"

  "You have a beautiful life." Johnny pouted, putting down his purchases. "And I know how much women love Sebastian, so you can't complain about the partner I provided for you!"

  "I'm not complaining about Sebastian, or the fact that this body is younger than what I actually am, but I can't live your life. Mine isn't perfect, but I want it back!"

  "I don't. I now have a position, a husband, the house is a little small, but we can work on that..."

  "Oh yeah? How are you going to pay the mortgage with your shopping sprees, huh? You're going to bankrupt Chris, and he'll divorce you!"

  "No, he won't!"

  Marian scoffed at Johnny's boldness. "You don't know Chris."

  Johnny grinned. "I know him more than what you think."

  Marian stared at him in disbelief. Having a new body hadn't stopped Johnny like it had stopped her, apparently! "Bitch! Why are you males so obsessed with sex anyway?"

  "Are you telling me you didn't do it with Seb?" Johnny asked, sarcastic.

  "No, I didn't have sex with Sebastian!"

  "But you will, now that you know that you won't get your body back, won't you?"

  "I don't know! I don't want any of this!"

  Her cell phone rang again. The display gave a number but no name. At least it wasn't Luke. Johnny glanced at the display too.

  "That's Sebastian's office," he said. "You better answer or he'll get really suspicious."

  Marian sighed and took the call. She could feel Johnny's eyes – her own eyes – piercing her.

  "What did he say?" Johnny asked when she hung up.

  "He was wondering why I wasn't home," she answered. "He said we can have Chinese tonight."

  "Oh." Johnny looked disappointed. "I hate Chinese."

  "Well, you're not having it, are you?"

  "Of course not, but Seb knows I hate it. He's testing you."

  "So, what am I supposed to do?"

  "Nothing. If you eat Chinese without balking, he'll know you're sick and won't bother you again."

  "Good. By the way, on Friday there's this dinner at this friend's house, and I'm supposed to bring the cake. It's a very easy recipe if you want..."

  "I can cook."

  "Good for you, but I can't. So don't try to impress anyone, or they'll ask you where you bought it."

  Johnny shrugged. "You better go, or your husband might get suspicious, finding a gorgeous young man with his wife."

  "Especially since you didn't make the bed. Fix this mess, thank you. I'll call tomorrow when I finish my shift, so we can talk some more."

  She went back to Sebastian's, still quite mad at the brainless young man who was making her look like an idiot. She stopped at a Chinese takeaway and arrived at the same time as Sebastian.

  He looked surprised by her choices, but thank God he liked the same Chinese food Chris liked. She had bought the usual as if she were having dinner with her husband.

  She could feel him observing her, but she was too depressed to act Johnny's part. She was supposed to be sick anyway, so he probably didn't mind she was so subdued.

  "I don't think you wanna go out tonight," Sebastian said after dinner.

  "No, thanks. A movie? You don't have many fiction books here."

  "You only read magazines anyway."

  "Oh. Can we play cards? Chess?"

  Sebastian chuckled. "You can't play chess!"

  She grinned. "Try me!" Let him think Johnny had changed. She couldn't make Johnny worse than what he was anyway.

  The chess game took her mind off the thought of Johnny with Chris.

  ***

  Chris knew Marian wasn't the best housewife in the world, but when he came home and found the bed badly made, shopping bags everywhere, the kitchenette a mess of food and cooking implements but a table with candles and his wife all dressed up, he knew things were still wrong.

  He heard her sing in the kitchen while she gave the final touches to their dinner. He sat with her and tasted delicious food obviously cooked in house, although he doubted she had done it all by herself.

  Her impish smiles and heavy makeup disturbed him, so they didn't talk much. He didn't manage to express his concern for her weird behavior.

  "I still don't know what we're celebrating," he said when the plates were almost empty, watching her beam with happiness.

  "My new look to fit your career?" she suggested, batting her eyelashes. She had never been so coquettish, which had made the difference for him, so he wasn't sure he liked the "new look" – she looked too much like al
l the other women.

  "OK," he said, trying to hide his nervousness. "Don't you think you overdid it with the shopping?"

  "Don't worry, I'll take some things back tomorrow," she shrugged, disappointed. "I have already been scolded for spending too much."

  "Well, it's your money," he sighed. "Besides, it might be a little early to celebrate, but we might fare a little better from now on."

  "You got a promotion?" She looked happily hopeful now.

  "Not confirmed yet. But probably yes."

  "When will you know?"

  "Hopefully at the end of the week, Monday at the latest."

  "I better keep both fingers crossed until then." She crossed her fingers and closed her eyes as if praying for his success.

  He smiled, took her hand, frowned at her painted nails. "How about taking off some of this?"

  She looked disappointed again. "Why, you think I'm wearing too much makeup?"

  "We're home, we're about to go to bed, and you don't need to impress me anymore," he answered patiently. She had never been so childish. And so moody.

  "Oh!" She brightened again. "OK." She left the table and went to the bedroom.

  Chris sighed and started to put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher.

  Marian came back, her face clean, nails still red, wearing sexy lingerie. "Oh, no, no, leave it, I'll do it tomorrow!"

  She grabbed him and hungrily kissed him. Chris was too astonished to stop her.

  5.

  Marian woke up before the alarm clock again. She and Sebastian had slept in their underwear, close but not too much, after a quiet and pleasant evening.

  She stared at still-sleeping Sebastian. She extended a hand as if to touch him, but went barely close enough to feel his warmth without actually touching his face and naked shoulder.

  Even if she wasn't comfortable with Johnny's body yet, she wished she could have some cuddles. She missed human touch. But she was so scared by the possible reactions of her male body, she'd rather stay away from any contact.

  She pulled her hand back with another sigh a few seconds before Sebastian's alarm clock went off. She remembered he didn't eat in the morning nor sit at the breakfast table, just like her, so she quickly dressed, thanked Johnny's lack of facial hair and joined Sebastian in the kitchen where the coffee was almost ready.