by Shay Savage
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way,” I said. Even though Ethan kept saying we hadn’t known each other long enough to worry about such shit, I seemed to keep slipping up with comments that could certainly be taken the wrong way. We had checked out a new restaurant earlier in the week, and I had really stuck my foot in my mouth when Ethan asked me to come with him when he needed to excuse himself to the restroom. I had laughed, thinking he was making some kind of joke or maybe just coming on to me. Then it hit me—since he hadn’t been to that place before, he didn’t know which door led to the women’s room and which one led to the men’s. Of course he would need someone to point out the right one in an unfamiliar place.
Needless to say, I felt like a complete and total shit after that one.
“It’s okay,” Ethan said with a small smile. “I could try to go back to school. It just seemed like there was no way to do it like a normal person. I didn’t want to have to explain myself all the time.”
“What do you mean, ‘like a normal person’?”
“I could have gone back with a whole individual learning plan, had tutors to help me with the textbooks, and taken oral tests instead of written, but I couldn’t have really been like the other students then. The last year of high school sucked when I was taken out of class during the tests so someone could read the questions, and I could spout off the answers. I hated being singled out like that.”
“I can understand that,” I said. “I never liked being the center of attention—not at school or anywhere else.”
“But you want to be an executive, where people are going to be looking up to you all the time?”
“Want? No. But…it is what it is.”
“Why are you doing it, Ashlyn?” Ethan’s voice dropped low and his massaging fingers slowed to a calming pace.
“Granddad grew that company from nothing,” I said with a shrug. “Dad took over from him and grew it even more. Taking over from him when he retires is his dream for me. I’m supposed to carry on the Draganov Financial legacy. It’s in my blood! Just ask Dad.”
“You should do something with books,” Ethan said so quietly I almost didn’t hear him.
“What? Work in a library or something?” I laughed at the idea.
“Yes,” he said, just as quietly. “You would like that more. You don’t even like your accounting and economics classes. I can tell by your expression when you’re studying.”
“Careers aren’t the same as hobbies, Ethan,” I said. “Reading is a hobby, not something you do for the rest of your life.”
“Sounds like something your dad would say.” Ethan smirked. Apparently, I quoted my dad quite a lot. I hadn’t noticed before, but Ethan had been calling me out on it for the past two days. I scowled at first but then laughed because he was absolutely right.
“Fine, it is something he’s said to me before. But he’s right—I can’t make a career out of hanging out around books.”
“You could write.”
“Writers don’t make it, Ethan. That’s nothing more than a pipedream.”
“Would you enjoy it?”
“Not the point.”
“It’s my point. It’s not like you need the money, so why not do something you love?”
“Because I don’t want to be one of those kids that just lives off the money someone else had worked to earn. I want to earn my own money, my own place in life.”
“Respect.” Ethan saluted me before going back to work on my heels. “But you’ll never know if you can make it as a writer without trying. And you could earn money working at a library. You could even open a bookstore.”
“Ugh!” I pulled my feet from his hands and crawled out of my bean bag chair and into his. “Enough! I think announcing my relationship with you was enough of a shock to my dad’s system. I’m not sure he could handle anything else.”
“I just want you to be happy.” Ethan gave me his luscious smile, which I kissed and then kissed again.
“I’m happy,” I told him, moving my lips over the edge of his jaw and then up to his ear. “You are making me very happy.”
He slipped his hands down my sides and cupped my rear end, pulling my hips up against the bulge in his khaki, cut-off shorts.
“I want to give you something.” He snickered. “I’ll give you a hint what it is…”
“Oh really?” I played along, trying to look naïve about his, um, gift. “Whatever could it be?”
“Well, it’s long…” He pressed up against me again.
“Is that so?”
“Uh huh…and hard…”
“Keep going!”
“And it wants to be inside of you.” He pulled me close and whispered into my ear.
“Whatever could it be?” I whispered back.
“It’s a banana,” Ethan said. “They aren’t quite ripe, but I like them that way, and I’m starving!”
I smacked him on the shoulder as he rolled out from under me, grabbed me by the waist, and hoisted me up over his shoulder. He ran us to his bedroom, threw me into the middle of the mattress, and started pulling off his shirt and unbuttoning his shorts.
“Aren’t you a little presumptuous?” I asked, giggling as I pulled my own shirt over my head.
“You want me.” He shrugged and laughed. “Either that or the idea of eating a green banana has you all panting and sweating.”
I threw one of the pillows at him, which went way over his head and smacked the door behind him. He jumped on top of me, pulling at the button and zipper of my jeans and quickly discarding them off the side of the bed.
“I can’t wait to be inside you,” he murmured into my ear as he slipped his fingers between my legs. He reached over to the nightstand drawer with his free hand, pulled out a string of condoms, and tore one open with his teeth. “God, you are so wet…I want you so much.”
He pulled his fingers out and unrolled the condom quickly, rolling back on top of me and placing his hands on either side of my face, kissing me deeply. My heart was pounding, and the muscles in my thighs were begging me to start moving against him. I pulled my mouth away from his lips, tugging a little at his lip rings as I did.
“Please,” I kissed up the side of his jaw and nipped at his ear lobe, “don’t make me wait…I need that cock of yours in me.”
He didn’t prolong the moment but hitched my leg up over his hip and pushed slowly and sweetly into me. He sighed as he entered me fully and held himself there, gazing down at me with sparkling, intense green eyes. He swiveled his hips, pulled out a little, then back in again, repeating the motion until I was screaming his name and digging my nails into his shoulders.
“You feel so fucking good.” Ethan moaned and bucked against me a few more times before letting out a sound that might have been my name, tensing all his muscles around me, and then slowly relaxing with his forehead on my chest.
Ethan pulled out of me slowly, his eyes never leaving mine as he tossed the condom in the trash. He wrapped his arms around me again, rolling us until I was lying on his chest. He tilted his head up under my chin and started nibbling my skin.
“Move in with me,” Ethan said with his mouth against my neck and his arms wrapped tightly around me.
He said it after every time we made love. I had a pretty good idea that he was saying it when I was in a state of vulnerable, post-coital bliss in order to catch me off guard. The past week started running through my head. The times I had been happy, content, and at ease had all been here, not necessarily lying on top of him with parts of him buried inside parts of me, but in this place, with Ethan. Every time I had been in my apartment alone, I had hated it. I had been uncomfortable, at best. Most of the time I was there, I had felt like something drastically important was missing, and it finally hit me exactly what it was. I raised my head, pulling away from his lips at my throat, and stared down at him. His cheeks turned pink, and he graced me with his cocky half smile.
“All right,” I said, smiling back.
“All
right?” His smile faltered, and he narrowed his eyes at me, confused.
“I’ll move in with you.”
“Seriously?” Ethan sat up against the headboard, pulled me onto his lap, and took my face in his hands. “Do you mean it?”
“I mean it, seriously,” I said with a laugh. “I mean, if you really want me to.”
“Fuck yeah, I do!” Ethan exclaimed. I laughed at his exuberance.
“But not until the first of the month,” I said, clarifying my plans so there would be no misunderstanding. “I need to give my landlord some notice if I expect to get out of my lease without paying for the whole summer. That will give me time to figure out what to bring with me and what to put in storage.”
“Deal!” Ethan cried. I watched as his tongue darted out over his lip rings, and I just had to kiss them. He kissed me back and then started mumbling against my mouth. “I can’t wait. Your being here…it just feels so right to me. I’ll get better food in the fridge, too—I swear…”
I laughed and shook my head.
“I think there are a few other things we’ll have to tackle,” I said. “The fridge isn’t my main concern.”
“What is?” Ethan asked, his eyes showing a little wariness.
“Telling my dad would be the main one. He still won’t talk to me about you at all. After I hung up on him, he’s refused my calls. I talked to Vanessa for a while, but she said he’s still mad and won’t talk about you.”
“He hates me, doesn’t he?”
“I don’t think so,” I said. Then I felt bad about lying. “I mean, he hasn’t given you a chance, so whatever he feels isn’t justified.”
“He has seen one side of me,” Ethan said quietly, his blush returning. “I can understand why he wouldn’t want you to be with me.”
“He’s not giving you the opportunity,” I argued. “He’s going to have to give you a chance. What are you doing Sunday?”
“Um, bikes, hanging out—the usual. You said you were busy with your graduation stuff all day. If you were going to do the whole graduation processional to get your diploma, I’d go, but you said you weren’t.”
“It’s a long and boring ceremony,” I said. “I don’t think any of my friends are going, and Dad said a long time ago that he hates those things.”
“So yeah, I’ll just spend the day with CeeCee.”
“No, you won’t.” I smiled at him. “You are going to be my date at my stepmom’s luncheon.”
“Ashlyn, that can’t possibly be a good idea.”
“Of course it is,” I said definitively. “Dad will have to acknowledge you and be at least reasonably polite. It is my graduation party, and Vanessa would murder him if he caused a scene at one of her gatherings.”
“I don’t know…”
“Please?” I asked, knowing it was underhanded to resort to begging. “I want you to be there, and Dad will get a chance to see how wonderful you are for me.”
Ethan furrowed his brow and looked away for a minute, then back again.
“If you think it’s a good idea, I’ll do it.”
“I don’t know if it’s a good idea,” I said, “but I know it has to happen eventually. I can’t avoid my family forever, which brings me to my next thought.”
“What’s that?” he asked.
“Tonight we hang out with my friends.”
Chapter 25—Incident
My doorbell rang, and I took a long, deep breath, smoothed out my dress, and went to greet Presley and Zoey.
“I don’t even know why I’m here.” Presley strutted through the door in her spiked heels, swinging a designer clutch around her wrist. “You have completely ignored me for over a week.”
“That boy must have some glorious cock on him.” Zoey laughed and gave me a hug.
“He does,” I whispered and winked at her.
“I knew it!” Zoey danced around in a circle as her low-cut blouse fell partway off her shoulder. She pulled it back up and smiled at me.
“Is his dick tattooed, too?” Presley raised an eyebrow and placed her hand on her hip.
“No, it’s not, if you really have to know. Stop being a bitch.”
Presley eyed me for a moment.
“You might as well start getting used to it,” I said. “Ethan’s joining us tonight, and we’re going to Marco’s instead of the club so he can get in.”
“People bring their whole families there!” Zoey whined and plopped down on the couch, folding her arms across her ample chest. “I mean, go meet him later for a quick fuck if you aren’t over it yet, but don’t make the rest of us suffer the little children.”
“He’s not a child!”
“I mean the rugrats people bring to Marcos.” Zoey leaned back on the couch. “Saturday night is full of kids until after ten.”
“You can cope for one night.”
“I hate kids.” Zoey pouted. “They’re noisy and they smell funny.”
“It’s not like we’re going to be at a table with a bunch of babies in diapers!” I sighed loudly, my frustration growing.
“No,” Presley said, “we’ll just have the one, slightly older child. Will he need a booster seat?”
“Presley!”
“You’re the one that wants to bring him out!” she yelled back at me. “We were all perfectly happy going to Club Mania until you changed all the plans because of him. People would be calling you a cradle robber if they could get past the fact that you’re dating someone who looks like a gang member with all the ink and the piercings. How’s he going to look standing beside you at professional functions? You’re going to be a laughingstock.”
“Well, that’s my choice, isn’t it? As my friend, I would think you could be a little more supportive!”
“I’ll go along with it tonight for your sake, but I don’t have to be happy about it!”
“That’s enough.” My voice was quiet, but they looked at me and took notice. “Sit down—both of you.”
Presley furrowed her brow as she sat down next to Zoey on the couch, and I sat across from them.
“I realize this is a little weird for all of us. I know Ethan doesn’t look like someone you would expect me to be dating, but I am dating him, and the two of you have to stop being so shitty about it.”
“I’m only trying to protect you,” Presley mumbled as she stared down at her hands in her lap. “People are already talking, and you have barely been seen with him in public.”
“They’re going to have to get used to it.”
“Ash,” Zoey said as she stared at me intently, “you don’t really think this is going to last, do you?”
“I’m going to move in with him.”
“What?” they both cried at once.
“He asked me to move in with him, and I’m going to do it. I’ll finish out the month here, but I’m going to break my lease and move into Ethan’s apartment with him.”
“Ash, are you sure?” Zoey leaned forward on the couch. “You’ve only known him for a few weeks!”
“I know that,” I said, “but I want to do it. I think this might be the real thing, you guys.”
There was a long silence as Presley and Zoey looked back and forth between each other and me.
“All right,” Zoey said, finally speaking up. “I think you’re completely cray-cray, but if you really like this guy, I support you. It’s going to take a little getting used to, but you know I’m always here for you.”
“Thank you,” I said. I reached over and gave Zoey a quick hug before turning to Presley.
“You are crazy,” she said. “I don’t know what you expect me to say. He’s never going to fit in with our social circle, and where does that leave you? Are you going to start hanging in the slums and maybe even ride a bike to work? How am I supposed to take any of this seriously?”
“Because I’m serious about him,” I told her, “and you’re my friend.”
“Am I?” Presley asked. “You didn’t even tell me about him. I didn’t know shit unt
il he met you outside of class. Is he going to turn out like Cole? Are you going to hide the shit he does to you from the rest of us like you did then?”
“Ethan is nothing like that.”
“He looks like he’d be like that. Long hair and tattoos? Really? I don’t care if he does own the Marquis penthouse; he looks like he belongs in a trailer park.”
“Why are you being like this?”
“Because I don’t want you to get hurt again!” Presley suddenly yelled. She stood up and pointed her finger at me. “You don’t remember what a fucking mess you were with Cole! You blocked it all out like it didn’t happen, but I was there! He had money, but that didn’t stop him from being an asshole or from sticking his dick into every bitch that would let him! And you put up with it! You never even came clean about him hitting you, not even to this day, and I know he did. I never bought your story about that scar coming from your running into a fucking door. How cliché of you.”
I gasped. I had no idea Presley had suspected Cole of hitting me. It wasn’t like her not to say something before now, and I was caught off guard and unable to say anything for a moment.
“It was only once,” I finally whispered. “That was right before I left him. He only hit me that one time.”
“All the signs were there,” Presley said. “You didn’t want to see them.”
“We just don’t want that to happen again, Ash,” Zoey said as she reached out to me.
“You knew, too?” I looked at Zoey and felt tears welling up in my eyes.
“I suspected,” she said.
The next thing I knew, all three of us were hugging and sobbing together.
I was relieved that Presley and Zoey knew how Cole had treated me. The burden of the secret was lifted, and it felt good to know my friends were here for me even after I had been such a fool. Now I needed them to support my relationship with Ethan as well.
“You have to get to know Ethan,” I said softly. “Really know him. He’s so completely unlike Cole, and it wouldn’t take you long to figure that out. I swear. Ask him why he has the tattoos and the piercings. Ask him what they all mean to him. If you did, you would understand what kind of person he really is. You just have to stop judging him by how he looks, and see what’s inside.”
