by Jane Corry
‘One of my old lecturers was there today,’ he says. ‘Did you see him? A very tall chap in a brown dogstooth suit.’
I did, as a matter of fact. He and Stuart had been deep in conversation at the bar while I’d chatted to Amanda.
‘He wanted to know if I’d be interested in joining his practice in Exeter,’ continues my husband. ‘He’s retiring and thought it might suit me. As for your work, you can do it anywhere. You’ve always said that. There are some great sixth-form colleges for Daisy. Melissa will love the beach life in the holidays and I’m pretty sure that Mum will be up for it too.’
He’s right. They are. And once I agree, it only takes a bit of persuasion on my part to get Stuart to see the doctor. That funny ad on television helped! The one with the hunky middle-aged man who dances down the stairs in the morning with his woman after taking Viagra. To our surprise, we’d both found ourselves laughing when we saw it during a commercial break. ‘See,’ I said. ‘There’s nothing shameful about it.’
It’s amazing how regular sex can bring you together. It’s not the act itself. Or just the feeling of being wanted. It’s both those things, combined with a large dollop of love and the family cement that comes from having two children, a granny and a dog to unite us.
But right now there’s another type of new start I’m trying to make. In fact, I’ve been agonizing over it for months. I could have asked Betty for her advice. I could even have asked Dad. But in the end, it’s Stuart who helps me make the final decision.
‘I think you should go ahead,’ he says. We’re lying in the semi-dark, our naked bodies entwined. ‘I know it’s scary. But it’s the right thing.’
He holds out his mobile phone to me. ‘You could do it now, if you want. It will be daytime there.’
My fingers shake as I ring the number my mother had put at the bottom of those letters. Every single one. The phone rings five times. My heart is beating so fast that it feels as though it’s in my mouth. I’m not going to be able to speak to her like this. I press Cancel.
‘Why don’t you do your pillow thing?’ says my husband.
What? He’s always laughed at me about my childish habit of turning it over three times for luck. My mother had done the same when she’d been young and she’d passed on the superstition to me. Daisy still does it, though Melissa now declares it to be ‘stupid’. Maybe she’s right.
‘That’s just silly,’ I say, a little embarrassed.
‘Not if it works for you,’ says my husband gently.
I turn my pillow over – one, two, three times.
Then I press redial. One ring. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven …
‘Hello?’ Her voice is breathless, as if she has just come running into the house. From the garden maybe. There is no Australian twang. It is exactly as I remember. It sings of summer in the Welsh valleys where my mother had lived before marrying my father. Of love. Of hope. Of a childhood when I thought everyone was always happy. Of a future that can still be rescued.
‘Hello?’ she repeats.
There is a silence. I want to speak but I can’t.
‘Who is that?’ she asks. There’s a slight tremor to her voice as if she thinks she knows but doesn’t dare hope.
I struggle for the right words. What do you say to the mother you rejected all those years ago?
Keep it simple, Stuart had advised.
I take a deep breath.
‘Mum?’ I say. ‘It’s me.’
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Acknowledgements
Huge thanks to the following:
My family for putting up with me when I disappear into my study and my own fictional world. (I’ll be downstairs in an hour. Promise!)
My amazing editor, Katy Loftus. Her talent is awesome. I bless the day we met.
Rosanna Forte and Victoria Moynes for their clever suggestions.
Natalie Wall for guiding the book through pre-production; Georgia Taylor and Ellie Hudson and Jane Gentle for their amazing work on the campaign; the whole Penguin Adult sales team who worked miracles; and DeadGood and Pageturners, who are always brilliantly supportive online.
My incredible agent, Kate Hordern, who, together with Katy, has changed my life.
The professionals who advised me on dentistry issues, including Richard Davies, Professor Damien Walmsley and the British Dental Association. They all helped me get my gnashers into the subject!
Countless agencies for extras/supporting artistes, including Ray Knight, Alan Sharman, Casting Collective and Universal Extras. As always, any mistakes are my own. Sounds like a great career.
Bectu, the union for creative ambition.
The Film Artistes’ Association.
The extras who kindly shared their experiences, including the one and only Nigel Burge (can’t wait to see you on screen!).
The lawyers who talked me through complex court scenarios, including Richard Gibbs and One Who Must Not Be Named (at his request). On a small number of occasions I have tweaked certain formal procedures and order of events. Please don’t hang me.
Any mistakes are probably mine and not the experts’, especially if they involve maths.
Trevor Horwood, my copyeditor (see above).
My father Michael Thomas for those childhood bedroom stories.
Nancy Bradshaw for our sisterly chats.
All my readers, bloggers, booksellers and supporters.
Finally, to (nice) mothers-in-law everywhere.
Want more from the queen of suspense?
TO TELL
THE TRUTH
Jane Corry
What if your son had committed murder?
Sarah always thought of herself and her husband Tom as good people. But that was before their son Freddy came home saying he’d done something terrible. Begging them not to tell the police.
Soon Sarah and Tom must find out just how far they’ll push themselves and their marriage to protect their only child …
As the lies build up and Sarah is presented with the perfect opportunity to get Freddy off the hook, she is faced with a terrible decision; to save him she must damn herself.
What would you do?
Save the one you love or TELL THE TRUTH?
COMING SOON
PRE-ORDER NOW
THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING
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Penguin Books is part of the Penguin Random House group of companies whose addresses can be found at global.penguinrandomhouse.com.
First published 2020
Copyright © Jane Corry 2020
The moral right of the author has been asserted
Cover images © Trevillion Images
This novel is a work of fiction. Names and characters are the product of the author’s imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. The Association of Supporting Artistes and Agents is a fictional organization, as are the Poppy Page Extra Agency and Sally’s Agency, and there is not and has never been, as far as I know, any such drama as Peter’s Paradise.
ISBN: 978-0-241-98466-6
This ebook is copyright material and must not be copied, reproduced, transferred, distributed, leased, licensed or publicly performed or used in any way except as specifically permitted in writing by the p
ublishers, as allowed under the terms and conditions under which it was purchased or as strictly permitted by applicable copyright law. Any unauthorized distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author’s and publisher’s rights and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly.
