discussed with Appius. In a clearly murky, gloomy situation, there was no place for further unknown or variables. Apparently, Appius had the same opinion, but he balanced between possibilities. Taking Octavian off the task could harm the dainty micro system that had been developed in the last days. Octavian had the best view at the local part of the entire situation. Appius was sure that Octavian wouldn't purposely harm the mission in any way. Therefore, he decided to keep Octavian in Britannia for some more days. Then, Nerva should take his place. Nerva was reliable, too, but there was no risk of him falling in love to any woman. Additionally, Nerva was on the way for so many weeks and he had to rest. He wouldn't dare to think about having a longer pause, so Appius had to arrange it for him.
Taking into consideration the mixed feelings of Octavian, knowing that Marcus Lucius simply calmed down the girl, and planning that Nerva could replace Octavian on site, Appius wrote some unusual sentences in the letter to Marcus Lucius. Marcus Lucius had to pretend being Maxentius, but he shouldn't get involved or show his involvement for Julia to anyone. Octavian shouldn't get affected by the situation too much, otherwise his emotions could influence the plan unwillingly. Above all, Julia was supposed to keep her integrity.
Marcus Lucius read the message after two weeks, because that was how long it took Nerva to reach the convoy on its way to Eboracum. Nerva was tired and needed a rest. As long as his distances were limited to a three-days’-rides, everything was fine. With the increasing distance, it was harder to stay trim and fit without having any pause. The convoy moved forward at a constant, normal speed. Nerva tried to deliver messages as fast as it was possible. His horses were extraordinary tired and he had to rest as well. Appius ordered two more soldiers to accompany Nerva on his way and to slow him down.
Octavian wasn't sure how to make sure that his friend would catch a longer rest during the journey, so he appreciated Appius indirect way to influence Nerva's stops. It was shortly after morning's habits were finished. The convoy just started to move forward when Nerva appeared with two legionnaires by his site. Octavian stopped the journey for a short break. He went to Marcus Lucius, who was already conscious and whose wounds were healing better with every day.
-Nerva's back. - Octavian reported shortly. He was out of breath from joy and his wrinkles showed his sorrows about his best friend.
Marcus Lucius understood the problem without any further explanation. Julia was sitting in her corner of the wagon and watched the conversation between the soldiers.
-Im feeling good enough to leave the bed. - Marcus Lucius suggested. From the time they left Londonium, he got better with every day. He wasn't able to pretend to be unconscious anymore. Julia was happy for him, and she stepped back more and more. He wanted to leave the wagon and breathe the real, wet, foggy air of Britannia. After weeks spent in limited space, he needed the feeling of freedom.
-You won't get a horse, you're too weak for that. - Octavian replied and wondered about Marcus Lucius's willingness to help a simple soldier. He was aware that Marcus Lucius was a tribune and could have been accustomed to giving orders without hearing any kind of veto.
-Then, I will sit here. Your messenger should rest in my bed. The escort should rest in another wagon.
The other wagon, which Marcus Lucius referred to, was originally used for Julia's slaves and it wasn't comfortable. It had two double-pallets, but there was not enough space for adult men to rest comfortably. The wagon with Maxentius's slaves burnt down during the ambush and the slaves didn't survive. The soldiers wondered how calm Julia was about this fact. She was able to get along alone. Maybe it was a matter of shock or simply the fact that she was not a spoiled woman. The soldiers had expected Julia to complicate the journey by fastidious expressions of a cheeky little miss. She was everything but a naughty little chit.
In the meanwhile, Octavian analysed Marcus Lucius’s suggestion. It was very generous. Finally, Octavian accepted and left the room. Julia didn't react. She wasn't asked for a permission or approval. She was completely ignored, so she isolated herself from the living surrounding.
-The man is exhausted. He needs to rest. - She heard Marcus Lucius speaking.
Julia didn't react, because she thought he was rather talking to himself than to her. After they left the ship, they didn't exchange any word. She was too ashamed of her phobia taking control over her rational way of thinking. Even, if she was thankful to him for calming her down, her sense of shame overwhelmed her, expanded and didn't allow her to speak to him in the last days.
-I'll sit down next to you, if it doesn't bother you. - He said to her.
She was too much occupied with her thoughts that didn't listen to him, so she didn't react, again. He noticed her lack of attention. He left the bed cautiously, repeated his last sentence and moved his hand in front of her eyes. Only then, she looked up to him. He bowed over her which was visibly painful to him. The red tunica he got from Octavian, covered Marcus Lucius's breast and legs up to his knees. His arms were naked and revealed that he was a strong man. She had already seen him almost completely naked and she knew that his body was good-looking. She was surprised that she wished to see him without clothes again. Her desire was unexpected and unexplained. Her sudden sexual allusions scared her and her cheeks turned red. She tied to look somewhere else to focus her attention on anything else than the vision of Marcus Lucius's naked upper body. Even while she moved her head in another direction, she noticed that he should protect his chest and belly better. When she glanced at him casually, she trembled shortly from excitement every now and then. He assumed it wasn't a sign of fear. She was simply startled and baffled. The weather here was colder and wetter than in other parts of the Roman empire, where they came from. She wasn't visibly prepared for it with her summer clothes from the Southern parts of the empire. It wasn't surprising that she was freezing. Marcus Lucius wanted to give her a blanket, but she didn't react. He carefully covered her with the material, even if it wasn't good for him to bow for a longer time.
-Did you say something? - She asked suddenly and automatically moved back to the wall. She was tense and unsettled. He thought that he might have been wrong and that she really was scared of him. Her attempts to conceal herself at any price could have been a reflex or a real, current fear. Therefore, he explained his intentions to her so she would calm down.
-I'll sit down next to you, if it doesn't bother you. They bring Appius's messenger. He needs to rest.
She nodded with understanding in her eyes. She wasn't surprised by untypical circumstances and methods. Since her marriage, everything was new and unusual to her. She couldn't find a place in life for herself neither in this moment of time nor in the place she was. She felt alienated and lost between the previous and current life styles.
Marcus Lucius waited patiently for her to move. She pressed her right side against the wooden, cold wall for some more minutes. She trembled, because it was chilly. She was used to Mediterranean warmth and she wasn't comfortable with the bleak weather of Britannia. It was rainy and moist. She didn’t have proper dresses for such muggy places. Marcus Lucius attentively covered her with another blanket. She stopped trembling and started looking somewhere, where her eyes didn't meet his. She had a runny nose for the first time. She didn't like it at all.
Soon after the talk, Nerva appeared feeling insecure. Marcus Lucius assumed that Nerva and Octavian had already exchanged the latest news and instructions from Appius. Nerva looked indeed exhausted. He was wet from sweat and the dust of the road collected on his tanned skin. His short, completely black hair was wet, as well. He introduced himself, not sure whether Marcus Lucius remembered him. Nerva saluted, Marcus Lucius nodded with his head while sitting on the floor next to Julia. It wasn't a proper behaviour to let your subordinate sleep in your bed. Nerva was totally surprised and unsure what was happening. It felt like in a trap, but Marcus Lucius gave him an impression of assurance. He didn't treat Nerva as an inferior, but as a peer. It showed in the sound of Marcus Lucius's voi
ce as he said:
-You should wash yourself. When you come back here, tell Octavian, we're ready to go.
Nerva nodded. Before he left the wagon, he gave Marcus Lucius and Julia their letters from Appius. Julia didn't read her letter immediately. She held the paper cautiously, gently. She stared at it for a while. In the meanwhile, Marcus Lucius had scanned his message. It wasn't long. Appius wasn't a person using a lot of words. Then, Marcus Lucius kneaded the paper powerfully. Apparently, he didn't have to read it twice to brand the information in his mind.
After a couple of minutes, Nerva re-appeared, with the same insecurity in his eyes, but without dust and sweat on his face. Julia didn't notice his stunned, perplexed state of mind, because he stood straight and proudly like a typical soldier, who shows discipline and respect.
-Take two blankets from over there. - Marcus Lucius ordered while showing at a plain dresser in the room. - You are allowed to rest. Lie down and sleep.
Nerva thanked him without words, with a simple nod. He
Vengeance & Remission (Introduction) Page 15
