by A L Williams
“They are not my concern.” We stared each other down, the storm raging around us and mixing with the unexpected flames.
Seconds ticked by. We lunged at each other, meeting in the middle in a flash of hot light. They called their fire as they veered to my side, wings flared. Heat surged from them, the force threw me against another tree. I slumped against the tree, shaking my head to clear my vision. I peered up and they hit me full force, grabbing me by my neck. I tugged at their hands, struggling to pull air into my lungs. They leaned in close.
“Pitiful boy. You were foolish to think you could win. You are weak. You all are going to die, and it will be your fault. Just like she was.” I gasped, my vision blurring. “You killed her,” they said, their voice an echo in my foggy mind. “You are a monster.”
My body began to shake, tears gathering. “No! That was you!”
Gabriel smirked. “Perhaps, but you could have saved her if you weren’t so pathetic.” I tensed, the force of their presence sinking into my head. “Stop.”
They pushed their will deeper, pulling my memories to the surface. I shook, the image of my mother bursting into flame replaying in my mind. I howled, desperately fighting the invasion. The sound of her burning flesh and bones smothered the roaring sky. Everything dissolved, the voices of my family a whisper in my fogged consciousness.
Chapter Twenty-Six
James
A soft melody flowed through the air. A gentle, familiar voice dragged me out of the darkness.
Wade in the water, wade in the water.
“James.”
Wade in the water, wade in the water.
“Baby Boy.”
My vision cleared, revealing my mother over me. “Mama?” I rasped.
She smiled. ”My child.” I lifted my head, looking around at the fields of the plantation. The fire was gone and the house stood tall in the distance. Tall stalks of cotton swayed in the late summer wind. I stumbled to my feet and gaped down at her.
She pulled herself from the ground. “Baby, what are you doing?”
“Mama, I— ”
She placed her fingers over my lips. “You need to end this.”
My body trembled. “I can’t beat them.”
She furrowed her brows. “Yes, you can.” I chewed my lip. She glanced down and her eyes widened. Grabbing my wrist, she turned it and frowned. I followed her gaze. My skin rippled, revealing scars that shifted to fresh cuts with blood dripping from the wounds. A single drop landed on my mother's hand. “Why are you doing this?” she asked.
I looked away, my chest tight. “It was my fault.” My mother yanked me into her arms, her warmth calming my trembling.
“It’s not,” she rocked me.
Children wade in the water.
God's gonna trouble the water.
“What happened was an accident,” she said.
I squeezed her close. “I need you.”
She pulled away and shook her head. “You don’t. You've been holding onto this for far too long.” She gripped my chin. “You have people that love you. People who are alive. You don’t need me anymore. Let go.”
More tears trailed down my face. “I can’t.”
“You can. Your strength is in here.” She pressed her palm to my chest. She stepped away and lifted my hand. “Show me.” I furrowed my brow. “Show me your gift, ” she repeated.
I thinned my lips, calling my fire. My fingers started to tingle again and fire surged from them, wavering along the tips. She watched, the fire flickering in her eyes.
She smiled at me. “This is who you are."
I shook my head. “It took you away from me.”
She ran her fingers along my cheek. “Loss is a part of life. But it isn’t the end of it.” She pointed at the ground and I glanced down. A single bud sprung out of the ash. ”Even in the most painful of times, life goes on.” I wiped my face and nodded. Losing her was the worst moment of my life, but meeting Hayley and Corbin may never have happened otherwise. Andrew and I may have never found each other.
Who's that young girl dressed in white?
Wade in the water.
The fire in my hand faded. “I will always miss you.”
She stroked my cheek. “I will always be with you.” She smiled. “Forgive yourself. And forgive him.”
My mind drifted to my father. “He’s a good man.”
She looked at me. “Yes, he is.”
“I love you,” I said.
A wide smile spread across her face. “Go deal with that childish creature.”
She patted my cheek as her voice faded away. “Your family is waiting for you.”
Wade in the water, wade in the water
Must be the children of the Israelite.
“I love you.”
“Be happy.”
The moon hid behind the clouds, but a soft light filled the clearing. A gust of wind hit my back, and I whipped around, finding the same faceless person from the vision of Gabriel in heaven, standing before me. “You.”
He beamed. “Yes.”
“You’re…” Tension spread through me. “Why are you letting them do this?”
His smile shifted to sadness. “All my children are flawed, my heavenly children most of all. I created them with a plethora of emotions, but they don’t know how to deal with them. They have lost their way.”
I tilted my head. “Then stop them.”
He chuckled. “I don’t get involved with earthly matters anymore.” He walked past me.
I jogged after him. “Why did you make me?”
He stopped. “Why not?” I blinked.
He turned to me. “You were conceived in love. You know that.”
I furrowed my brow. “My existence has caused so much pain.”
His gaze softened. “Everything happens for a reason. You have a purpose.” He moved closer and grabbed my chin. His eyes twinkled brightly in the gloomy haze. “You are stronger than you think.
“Go,” he said, his voice fading in the breeze. Familiar voices echoed in the distance as everything around me faded away.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
James
I opened my eyes and the smell of burned wood filled my nose. Gabriel’s fingers were still wrapped around my neck. Their eyes widened. A burst of flame exploded from my skin, shoving them back. They scowled.
“Why are you still fighting?” I pushed off the tree, strolling towards them. They dashed forward and my fire pulsed, throwing them to the ground and kicking up mud mixed with dirt and ash.
I smiled, remembering my mother's words. “It’s over. I’m done running.” My back began to tingle, searing hot pain vibrated through me. I collapsed to the ground, clutching the mud, the pain tearing a shout from my throat. My skin burned like it was being ripped from my bones.The clap of hooves on gravel, a loud snap, and trumpets flooded my mind.
Suddenly, the pain receded and my body went limp as warm blood slid down my sides. Something rose above me and I glanced back. Raven wings fluttered over my shoulder. I stumbled to my feet and rotated my shoulders. I eyed the wings, each feather shimmering with the flashing sky.
Movement caught my attention and I followed it. Gabriel pulled themselves up, wiping at the blackened blood that trailed down their face. They scowled. “How?”
I balled my hand into a fist and it ignited. They lunged at me. I leapt into the sky but did not dodge their attack, my wings awkwardly flapping behind me. I hit the ground, kicking up silt around me, the rain still coming down hard. They floated above me. Groaning, I pulled myself up, mud staining my wet clothes. I flapped my wings and then jumped into the air, swaying as I flew and then plummeting back down. Squeezing my eyes shut, I forced my wings to move.
Once they were under control, I refocused my attention on Gabriel. Their eyes flashed with rage and they shot down. With all my strength, I jetted towards them. They dodged my advance. I righted myself, catching one of their wings and yanked. I slung them to the ground. They hit it wi
th a bang, quieted but the booming sky. I descended, landing on my feet. They struggled to stand but collapsed back into the mud, their body shaking. Walking over, I glared down at them, the span of my wings casting a shadow.
“Leave!” I summoned flames into my hands, balling my fist.
Their eyes darkened. “Never!” They lunged at me, calling their fire. I wrapped my wings close to my body, blocking the flare. I dashed towards them, knocking them to the ground. The rain slowed to a drizzle. “It’s over,” I said as I propelled myself back into the air, flame and light surrounding me. Gabriel snarled and leapt into the air. I gritted my teeth and flung my flames as they approached. They were engulfed, shrieking in pain. Their wings sizzled and burned. They slammed into the ground. I landed on my feet, inches from them. They shook, their limp feathers singed and covered in mud.
They curled their fingers in the sludge. “This isn’t fair.”
I kneeled in front of them. “None of this will make it better.”
They scooted away, squeezing their eyes closed. “No.”
“It’s over,” I said.
They trembled. “No.”
I knitted my brows as something squeezed in my chest. We weren’t that different. I let my past consume me, unable to control my emotions. I held out my hand, offering it to them. They tensed, gaping at it. I waited.
Suddenly, they lunged at me with a growl. I jerked back and punched them with my blazing fist, sending them to the ground. They heaved into the dirt and dragged themself to their feet. They glared at me, shaking with rage. They bared their teeth, blood dripping down their face.
“Please. Let this go,” I said.
They dashed towards me, their wings limp and hanging from their back.
My wings cut through the air, striking their neck with a snap. They sank to the ground once again, trembling face down in the mud. Everything went still and silent. The sky brightened, the clouds parting. I moved towards them, a flash of light catching my attention. I glanced up, seeing a beam of ivory rays shoot down from above and illuminate Gabriel. Seconds passed and the light vanished, taking them with it. I furrowed my brow and looked up.
My father moved up beside me. “He stepped in.”
I blinked. "Why?"
He peered at me. "Only he knows."
I sighed. Who was I to question God?
Hayley ran up, staring at where Gabriel had been. She peeked up at my wings. “They’re so pretty.” She tugged on a feather.
“OW!” I jerked away.
My father glared at her. “Do not do that. They are like flesh.”
His wings laid folded against his back. She reached behind him and he sidestepped. “What did I just say?”
She batted her lashes. “Oops.” I looked between them and burst into laughter, leaning over with my hand on my stomach. I stopped laughing, glancing back when something moved behind me. Andrew walked up and I examined him.
“I’m in one piece again.” He chuckled. “You did well.” I threw myself at him, relaxing against his warm body and inhaling his scent. “I knew you could do it.” He wrapped his arms around me, squeezing me close.
“That was fun,” Ben said.
I nuzzled my face into Andrew’s chest. Glancing up, his eyes sparkling with affection. I pulled him down.
“I love you.” Seconds passed in silence. He searched my eyes and a smile spread across his face. He pulled me tight against his body.
“I love you too.” He kissed me, taking my breath away.
“Get a room!” Hayley said. I turned, sticking my tongue out. She grinned and my father's lips curled.
When I glanced down, noticing a small bud curl out of the dried mud, I smiled. I turned back to Andrew, the man who had somehow captured my heart, finding him studying me curiously and I smirked. I seized his mouth, kissing him with all I had. The dark clouds dissipated, allowing the sun to peek through, and a rainbow shot across the sky.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
James
The next morning, the sun shone through the window, brightening the room with beams of light. My head laid against Andrew’s warm chest. I sighed and then glanced up, finding him smiling at me. He leaned down and kissed my forehead. “Good morning.”
“Morning.” I climbed fully on top of him, capturing his lips for a gentle kiss.
He hummed and pulled back. “How did you sleep?”
I laid down on him, nuzzling his neck. “Better than I have in a long time.”
“Good.” He ran his hand along my locks.
We remained like that, a cool breeze drifting in through the kitchen window. I thought I had lost him, but he was here and he wasn’t going anywhere.
“Do you think Gabriel is gone for good?” he asked.
“I don’t know. We’ll be ready if or when they come back.” I pulled away and climbed off of him. He groaned, trying to pull me back into the bed. I moved out of his reach and sauntered towards the bathroom, glancing back. He looked at me with such intensity that I shuddered.
I shook my head. “I need to meet up with Hayley and Corbin.”
He sighed. “I should go visit my Mambo.”
We made our way into the bathroom. After we were clean and he fucked me against the shower wall, requiring us to clean ourselves again, we got out.
He walked to the bed and grabbed his clothes with a towel wrapped low on his hips. I dressed and then walked to my painting, pulling the sheet off. I studied it for a moment, seeing the pain in every stroke. Andrew came up beside me. “This is fantastic. But sad.”
I nodded. “I was.” He pulled me close and I leaned my head against his chest. “I was so wrapped up in my suffering, I couldn’t see anything else.”
He squeezed me closer. “And now?” I peered over his shoulder when sunlight reflected off the blade, still on the cart. I pulled away and walked around him. I picked it up, holding it in the palm of my hand. He came up beside me and I glanced at him. He stood silent, his brows furrowed and lips thin. He didn’t want me to hurt myself anymore, and I understood. If it was him, I’d feel the same. He didn’t say anything. He was leaving it up to me.This was my choice.
I had spent so much of my life running and allowing the current of life drag me along. It was time for me to take control of myself. I turned back to him. “I don't know if I can stop. I will do my best.”
His eyes softened. “I will be here to support you. You have me in any way you need.” He moved closer to me and leaned down to kiss my forehead. “I am not going anywhere. We’ll figure it out together.” He squeezed my hands.
I grinned. “Together.” He pulled me in, kissing me hard. We didn’t leave his house until sometime later after he fucked me against the door.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Andrew
I walked through the park, the cool air brushing across my skin. Kids ran around, their laughter warming my heart. I approached my Mambo who sat on the stone bench, watching them play and never looking my way as I joined her.
“So it would seem that you defeated the angel.” she said. I smiled my mind drifting to this morning and then froze when I realized what she said.
I frowned. “How— ”
“The Loa have been talking.” My frown deepened. I wish they would stop running around, blabbing. She laughed. “They will always be with you, whether or not you become Houngan.” Silence fell between us as the children ran to the swing.
“Have you made your choice?” she asked.
I watched the sun drifted behind wisps of clouds. “I have spent so much time trying to keep them away. I was afraid that if I let them get too close, they’d pull me back.”
She stared off. “And now?”
Drawing a deep breath, I looked at her. “I am Andrew, and Houngan.”
She turned to me. "Things are going well with the boy?" I nodded. She smiled, taking years off her face. She placed her hand on top of my knee and we continued to sit in silence. The children’s carefree shouts filled the air,
unaware of the hidden world lurking around them. And I would keep it that way.
Chapter Thirty
James
Across Tucson, the sun covered everything in light. People moved about. I walked to the burned down structure that had been Fresh N Hot. We had managed to get it all cleaned up over the last week since we got back. It was still surreal to see it like this. However, when Corbin was released, the dejected look on his face when he saw it was the worst part. He always assured us he was okay, but something had changed.
“Jamie!” I turned as Hayley ran up, Corbin trailing behind her.
I walked towards as she ran at me, wrapping my arms around her. “How are you feeling?”
She beamed. “I’m great. Guess what?”
I looked down at her. “What?”
Her eyes sparkled. “I got an internship at The Department of Child Safety. ”
I pulled her in for another hug. “I’m so proud of you.” She squeezed me close.
I glanced over at Corbin, he walked up behind her. I watched as he looked over the remains of his business. His brows furrowed and his lips thinned. My chest tightened. He looked over at us, his eyes tired.
“Hey, how are you?” I asked, releasing Hayley.
A smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes spread across his face. “I’m doing okay.”
I furrowed my brow and nodded. “I’ll do whatever you need.”
He smiled again. “Thank you.”
“Oh, I forgot the coffee,” Hayley dashed back to Corbin’s car.
“You’re different,” he said.
I looked at him. “Am I?”
“Did you make up with your man?” he asked.
I smiled. “Yes.”
He turned back to the building. “Good.”
Hayley jogged across the street with three coffees in her hands, almost spilling them as she approached. I shook my head. So much had happened, and it still didn’t seem real. Gabriel was gone and everyone was safe. I wasn’t sure about the future, but I knew one thing. I had a family again, and this time, I would hold on to it. This was my home, now. They were my home.
