by Kate Hardy
But contraception wasn’t always one hundred per cent effective.
She swallowed hard. Her period was late, but that was probably due to all the stress she’d been under lately—wasn’t it?
Though the idea wouldn’t leave her. Especially because the scents in the cafe where she met Susie made her feel even queasier than she’d felt in the hospital.
‘Are you all right, Kel?’ Susie asked.
’Course I am,’ Kelly fibbed. This wasn’t something she was ready to discuss with anyone. Not until she’d reassured herself that she was being ridiculous. She managed to keep the conversation light until Susie left to pick the boys up from school, and then she headed for a nearby supermarket and bought a pregnancy test. Not wanting to wait until she got home, she went to the toilet in the supermarket. Thankfully, the cubicles were all empty, so she didn’t feel guilty about taking her time. She took a deep breath. This would reassure her that everything was fine and she was panicking over nothing.
She did the test, and watched the screen. A little square box appeared at the left hand side of the screen to show her that the test was working. Another appeared; another; and then the final one to say that the test was over.
Was she or wasn’t she?
Time slowed down, and every second felt like a minute. But finally the word flashed up on the screen. Absolutely definite.
Pregnant.
Oh, help.
What did she do now?
This wasn’t part of the deal. Her marriage to Luc was supposed to be in name only—something that wasn’t real. Except over the last few weeks they’d moved towards a rather different relationship. Friendship plus physical attraction. Did that really equal love?
But this pregnancy was a real game-changer. They couldn’t pretend anything, any more. They had to face the reality.
She had absolutely no idea how Luc would react.
Would he insist on making their marriage permanent, for the sake of the baby? Would he expect to be part of the baby’s life if they stuck to their original plan and had a quick divorce after a few months? Would he ask her to have a termination?
Kelly didn’t think he’d choose the last option. She didn’t want that, either. But as for their future... She had absolutely no idea what she really wanted, either. Her head was too much in panic mode now she knew she was pregnant.
She and Simon had planned to start trying for a baby—a much-wanted addition to their family who would be so very deeply loved. But she and Luc weren’t in that position. His parents had been surprisingly kind and accepting, but she was pretty sure that Eleonora had had to talk them round to the idea; her first conversation with Vittoria, on Luc’s laptop, had been awkward in the extreme. Would the baby change things? Would the news make things better, or would it be an extra complication?
And if the baby was a boy and the King didn’t change the succession rules, that meant the baby she was carrying would be second in line to the throne. She and Luc would both be trapped; they’d both have to give up the careers they’d worked so hard to build. And no way would he be able to follow his dream of setting up his cardiac clinic.
She stared at the test stick. Given that it was digital, there was absolutely no way she’d misread it.
Pregnant.
All the way back to Luc’s house, her mind was in a whirl.
‘Are you all right, bella?’ Maria asked when she walked in.
‘Fine,’ Kelly fibbed. ‘Just a bit tired.’ And she had no idea how to tell Luc.
She picked at her food that night, and he noticed. ‘What’s wrong? I know you met your sister for lunch. Susie and the baby are all right, aren’t they?’
‘Yes.’ It wasn’t Susie’s baby who was the issue. It was theirs.
He frowned. ‘Whatever’s upset you, is it something I can help with?’
She blew out a breath. ‘Luc, we need to talk. In private.’
‘Now you’re worrying me.’
He was going to be a lot more worried when she told him the news, she thought.
When she didn’t answer, he said, ‘OK. Let’s go for a drive.’
‘No.’ This was going to be a shock to him, and driving wouldn’t be sensible. ‘Let’s go for a walk in the garden.’
‘If that’s what you want, sure.’
Right at the bottom of the garden was a fountain; next to it was a wrought-iron bench. They sat down, and Luc waited patiently until Kelly was ready to talk.
She took a deep breath. ‘There isn’t an easy way to say this. I know we didn’t plan it and we took precautions—but I’m pregnant.’
His expression was utterly inscrutable. ‘How pregnant?’
‘I’m a couple of weeks late.’
‘And your cycle’s regular?’
She nodded. ‘Every twenty-eight days. Practically to the hour. We’ve both been busy since we came back from New York so I didn’t notice I was late. It didn’t even occur to me until today, when I felt a bit off-colour and then the smells in the cafe made me feel a bit sick. I thought I was being ridiculous, and then I realised my period was late.’
‘Have you told anyone else?’
She shook her head. ‘I didn’t even tell Susie of my suspicions. I did a test on the way home—and I thought you ought to be the first to know.’
* * *
He was going to be a father.
The world spun for an instant.
He really hadn’t expected Kelly to tell him this. And he had no clue about whether she was shocked or pleased or anything. They hadn’t even discussed children. Their marriage was supposed to be in name only—except he’d changed the terms when he’d made love to her on their wedding night.
‘Thank you for telling me first.’ He paused. ‘If my calculations are right, this is a honeymoon baby.’
‘That’s what I thought, too. Conceived in New York.’ She swallowed hard. ‘So, what now?’
‘We’re married,’ he said. ‘Our baby is legitimate. And, as he or she is my child, the baby will be a prince or princess.’ And that changed everything. The baby would need his protection. He needed to make things right. He looked at her. ‘So perhaps we should forget the few months we originally planned.’
‘You mean, wait until after the baby arrives before we have our quiet divorce?’
‘I mean, forget the divorce altogether. We’re going to be parents, Kelly.’
‘And what happens when your father finds out about the baby? If Elle has been trying to persuade him to change his mind about the succession rules, this baby...’ Her voice tailed off and she stared at him.
‘As things stand right now, then the baby will be second in line to the throne. If Babbo does decide to change the rules, the baby will still be fifth in line—it will be Elle, Alessio, Anna, me and then our baby, and then Giu.’
She raked a hand through her hair. ‘Which means we’re both trapped. We can’t continue working here at Muswell Hill Memorial Hospital.’
‘Not necessarily,’ he said. He’d already disrupted her life so much. He needed to do the right thing and let her choose what she wanted to do. ‘What do you want?’
‘I...’ She shook her head. ‘I don’t know. I hadn’t even considered this might happen.’
‘But you’d planned to have children with Simon.’
She looked away. ‘Simon isn’t here any more.’
Had she reached the stage where she was ready to move on and make a new life for herself? Or was she still in mourning? Luc had no idea. But now his head was clearing from the shock of the news and he knew exactly what he wanted from his life. He wanted Kelly and he wanted their baby.
‘I need time to think about this,’ she said. She looked him straight in the eye. ‘What do you want?’
Crunch point.
If he told her that his feelings towards her h
ad changed, would she be relieved or would she back away?
‘I think we should stay married,’ he said.
‘For the baby’s sake.’
Her tone was flat and he couldn’t read her expression. He could pussyfoot around the situation; then again, he’d always hated the intricacies of diplomacy. He preferred to tell it like it was. Telling her the truth couldn’t make things any worse. ‘Your life as my queen would be very different,’ he said. ‘And it wouldn’t be what you’d signed up for. I know that. But, baby or no baby, I still don’t want to be king. I want to be a cardiac surgeon. And I happen to like being married to you.’
‘Because I’m safe?’
Did she really have no idea how he felt about her? ‘Remember the song I sang at our wedding reception? I meant every word,’ he said. ‘I don’t want to stay married to you for the baby’s sake—I want to stay married to you for mine. I’ve fallen in love with you over the last couple of months, Kel. I thought I’d forgotten what love feels like, but being with you and waking up with you in my arms every morning makes the world feel like a much better place. And I know why. It’s because I love you.’
She looked utterly shocked.
Did that mean that she hadn’t guessed? Or did it mean that she didn’t feel the same way about him and was horrified to think that he loved her?
He pressed on. ‘I know you’ll always love Simon, and I don’t intend to supplant him, but love stretches, Kelly. I hope you can learn to love me, too, to make our marriage a real one and make a family with me. But I’m not going to put pressure on you. I know I come with complications.’ His royal lifestyle was the reason why Rachel had left him. Would it be the same for Kelly? The press had been horrible to her on the news of their marriage; although they’d weathered that particular storm, had it made her wary about how her life would be with him in the future?
‘I’ll give you as much time as you need to think, and I’ll support whatever decision you make. But, even if you don’t want me to be part of your life, I want to be part of the baby’s life and give you all the support I can.’
She said nothing, and Luc felt sick. Maybe he shouldn’t have declared himself after all. Maybe the past was just about to repeat itself.
‘I’ll give you time to think about what you want,’ he said again, rising to his feet. ‘Or to talk to someone you trust. Your mum, your sister, your best friend. No pressure.’
* * *
To make their marriage a real one and make a family with him.
And he hoped she’d learn to love him.
But was that how he really felt, or was he only saying that because of the baby—because the baby would be a royal heir?
Kelly hadn’t thought herself ready to move on, yet. And there was only one place she could go right now: only one person she could speak to.
‘I need to go out,’ she said.
‘I’ll get Gino to drive you.’
* * *
She could see that he was holding himself in check and trying not to smother her. ‘Thank you, Luc. For giving me time,’ she said, and reached out to squeeze his hand.
It didn’t take long to drive to the church where Simon was buried. She’d had Gino stop to buy flowers on the way; and she knelt on the ground in front of the gravestone while she arranged them in the vase.
‘I miss you,’ she said. ‘And I wish we could’ve had the chance to grow old together. But it wasn’t to be.’ She sat down properly and wrapped her arms around her knees. ‘If I’d been the one to die, I would’ve wanted you to find someone else. Not to replace me, but to share your life and love you, the way you deserve to be loved, because I wouldn’t have wanted you to be lonely. And I’m pretty sure that’s the way you feel—felt—about me.’ She dragged in a breath. ‘I’ve met someone. We liked each other right from the start. We became friends. And we got married to solve a problem for both of us—to show his dad that he was committed to a life in medicine, being a heart surgeon; and to stop everyone trying to find me a new partner. Except it didn’t quite work like that.’
Over the weeks of their marriage, it had changed.
‘It didn’t stay being a marriage in name only. He says he loves me, Simon, and I believe him. And I... I think I love him.’ Now she’d said it out loud, it felt real. ‘We’re having a baby. It wasn’t planned—but he’s going to be as good a dad as you would’ve been. He’s got a niece and nephew who adore him, and he’s great with Jacob and Oscar. There’s a bit of me that’s scared he only loves me because I’m carrying his heir, but it’s time for me to take a risk. To stop grieving and live again.’
Finally she could give herself permission to move on.
‘I’ll always love you and you’ll always be part of me. But I want to make a life with Luc. Be his partner, be a cardiologist, and be the best mum I can be to our baby.’ She smiled and stood up again. ‘I guess I need to have a serious talk with Luc now. I won’t ever forget you, and I’ll always stay in touch with your family. That won’t change.’ She pressed her hand on the top of the gravestone. ‘Wish me luck. We’re still going to have to persuade Luc’s dad that he’s a heart surgeon rather than a future king. And I’m definitely not a queen. But we’ll get there.’
Gino drove her back to Luc’s house. When she walked through the front door, she could hear that he was playing the piano. Bach, the same kind of music he operated to: which gave her a clue that he was trying to think, to work out a solution to their situation. She tapped on the door of his office and went inside; he stopped playing as soon as she walked in.
‘That sounded great,’ she said. ‘You don’t have to stop.’
‘Are you OK? Do you need anything?’ he asked.
‘Yes—and yes,’ she said.
He looked faintly nervous. ‘What do you need?’
‘I need you to be honest with me.’ She walked over to him and nudged him to budge over on the piano stool. ‘I went to Simon’s grave.’
‘Uh-huh.’ She could tell he was doing his best to keep his voice neutral, but it was obvious that he was on tenterhooks.
‘What you said about loving me. Did you mean it, or are you saying that because of the baby?’
‘I meant it,’ he said. ‘It isn’t just about the baby. Remember you said I needed to see things from my dad’s side? Knowing that I’m going to be a father makes me realise that I want our child to grow up being loved and valued for their own sake, not because they’ll be my heir. And that’s how I feel about my wife. I want her to know I love her and value her for herself, not because she’s pregnant with the potential second in line to the throne.’ He took her hand. ‘I love you, Kelly. For who you are, not what you represent.’ He dropped a kiss into her palm and closed her fingers over it.
‘You love me.’
‘I love you for you. While you were gone, I took a hard look at my life. I know what I want. But I also know I need to be fair and give you the choice, not pressure you into doing what you think you ought to do.’
She nodded. ‘What you said about love stretching. You’re right. I’m finally ready to move on. And what I need is you.’ She swallowed hard. ‘Because somewhere along the way I fell in love with you, too. Waking up to every new day in your arms sounds just about perfect to me. I want to share my life with you and our baby—to make a family.’
‘Married for real,’ he said.
‘Married for real,’ she echoed. ‘It’s early days, but I think our family needs to know about the baby. We kept them in the dark about getting married and that was a huge mistake. We need to prove to them that we won’t do that again, so we’ll trust them with the news. And I think we need to go to Bordimiglia and have a very frank conversation with your dad.’
‘Sort it out once and for all.’ Luc looked at her. ‘What if my father says he won’t change the succession rules?’
‘Then you get to be King. But
if that happens, then when you’re King, you can change the rules,’ she said. ‘Maybe you can work out a compromise where you share the royal duties with Elle and Giu, and get time to do some part-time work as a cardiac surgeon as well. You can have the best of both worlds.’
‘Compromise.’ He looked at her thoughtfully. ‘And you’re prepared for the media circus when we officially announce your pregnancy?’
‘Yes—because I know you’ll be by my side and I can handle anything with your help.’
‘You’re sure about this?’ he checked.
‘I’m sure about this. I love you,’ she said simply.
‘I love you, too,’ he said. ‘And we’ll go to Bordimiglia on our next days off. Be open with my parents. And then face whatever happens next—together.’
‘Together,’ she agreed.
EPILOGUE
Ten months later
‘YOU HAVE EVERYTHING you need, bella?’ Umberto asked.
‘We do, Babbo. Grazie,’ Kelly said, and hugged him.
‘I’m glad you’re having Giacomo christened here in Bordimiglia. Of course, we would have come to London if you’d wanted us to,’ Umberto said.
‘But we’re following the tradition and having him christened in the same place as his father, his grandfather, and every great-grandfather as far back as you can trace your family,’ Kelly said with a smile.
‘Tradition is good,’ Umberto said to his son.
‘Agreed. But I’m glad you’ve modernised the monarchy and Eleonora is taking over from you at the end of the summer,’ Luc said. He cradled his son tenderly, talking directly to him. ‘Girl power is good. You tell your nonno.’
Obligingly, Giacomo gurgled.
‘That’s our boy.’ With a grin, Luc handed his son over to Umberto.
Umberto smiled. ‘My beautiful grandson. I wonder if he’ll grow up to be as challenging as you, Luc?’
‘He’ll grow up to be himself,’ Luc said. ‘And I expect we’ll fight like mad when he’s a teenager. But I will teach him that family and love are the two most important things, and everything else is about negotiating a good compromise.’
