by René, Dani
“I’m not yours yet, Nathan. You do not speak to me like I’m one of your dumb little slaves.” Her voice lifts as the anger spurs her on. I want her bent over on this fucking table taking my whip for answering me in that tone.
“Let’s get one thing clear, Eva, I’m an asshole. You knew that when you met me. This,” I lift my hand, pointing between us. “Is just an arrangement. I may be sweet at times, but don’t mistake it for weakness, I’ve always been a Dominant and no woman is going to make me soft with a flutter of her lashes.”
“Oh, I have no doubt that you couldn’t actually feel anything,” she bites back angrily. When she pushes up, rising from the chair, I’m on my feet in seconds. “Don’t.” She bites the word out while pinning me with a heated glare. I watch in awe as she pivots on her heel, making her way to the restrooms.
If there’s one thing she’s mistaken of, it’s that women do not order me around. Ignoring the glares from the patrons, I follow her through the restaurant and into the ladies’ room.
“Leave me alone, Nathan,” she says in a tone that’s almost as commanding as the one I use on my toys.
Ignoring her, I grip her long hair, tugging her back against me. Pulling her into a stall, I slam the door and flip the lock. When I turn to her I see the fear in her eyes, but I also see anger. I press her against the door, wedging her between my body and the flimsy wood. “Do. Not. Ever. Speak to me like that,” I grunt in her ear, hissing as she shudders. “I am your Dominant, and if you don’t obey me I will punish you so badly, you’ll not be able to walk for a week. Are we understood?” She doesn’t respond immediately, but with one roll of my hips, I press my erection between the globes of her ass. “I asked you a fucking question.”
“Yes, Sir.”
“Good girl,” I murmur, reaching to her front, I pull the skirt she’s wearing, bunching it around her waist. My fingers find her pussy clad in the soft lace. My fingers taunt her heat, stroking her until she’s clawing at the door. “Now what you’re going to do is go back to the table, sit with me and have lunch. You are the one I’m with right now. Not any other woman. And if you don’t sort this jealousy shit out, I’m going to fucking break you, Eva. I’m going to fuck you so hard, and so deep, your cunt will never be the same.”
“Nate, please,” she begs as my fingers dip under the material of her panties. She’s drenched.
“Do you like this, Eva? You like me pressing you against the door? I can do anything I want, can’t I?” My words feather along her neck and my lips suck the soft skin into my mouth. I allow my teeth to graze along the skin, causing her to shudder against me.
“Yes, I do. I love it rough,” she confesses when my teeth sink into her flesh.
Biting hard enough, I taste the delicious crimson liquid that dots my tongue. “Do you want me to unleash my beast on you, little one?”
“I want everything you’ve got,” she gasps. Her words are filled with confidence and I wonder how much she can handle.
“Then tonight we’ll see just how much you can take, sweet slut. I promise you, after we play tonight, you won’t ever be the same. I’ll break you in so many ways, no other man will come close to giving you the pleasure I can.”
With that, I pull my fingers from her core and step back. I release her body, allowing her to sag against the door. Her breaths are ragged. When she turns, her glistening eyes meet mine, and she smiles. “I can’t wait.” She unlocks the door and makes her way out of the restroom leaving me with a fucking hard on that could cut through steel.
She’s the perfect cut. A diamond that just needs polishing and tonight I’ll make sure she shines. With a smirk on my face, I head out of the stall to walk past the shocked woman glaring at me. Ignoring her, I pull open the door and saunter back to the table, hoping nobody glances at the bulge in my dark blue jeans.
* * *
When I pull into the parking garage, I turn off the car and glance at Eva. She’s been sitting silently flicking through the contract that we collected at the office. We make our way up to my apartment, once inside, she settles herself on the sofa, pulling her legs under her, and starts reading through the terms and conditions.
It’s not a lot to go through, but it explains exactly what’s expected of her. She’ll live with me full time, I want her to be able to work or study without worrying about money. I’ll buy her clothes, food, toiletries, and anything else she may need. When we head into my playroom, or the dungeon at the club, she will obey me no matter what I ask of her.
I’ve included that she’s to wear a collar, even in the three weeks of us testing the waters so to speak. Everyone she comes into contact with will know she’s owned. The collar will be a slim silver necklace with a pendant which will have an engraving on it SS.
The rest of it is standard lists of limits, both hard and soft. And that’s where I know we’ll argue. She doesn’t like sharing, I do. I need it. Grabbing two tumblers, I pour a double shot of brandy in both, then make my way to her on the sofa.
“I thought you might need this,” I offer.
She lifts her gaze, smiles, and then takes the glass. “Thank you,” is all she says before dropping her head and continuing her perusal of the paperwork.
Deciding to leave her, I head to the terrace and take in the city air. It’s a balmy evening with the moon already high in the sky. The sun is on the horizon, illuminating the air in a golden glow. I’m tense. I can feel the tightening in my shoulders.
I’ve never been in a situation where I’ve had a submissive read the contract. I drew it up a long while ago, when I was contemplating one, but that didn’t work. I remember the day she walked out. She called me a monster, a vile animal and that was the last time I’d seen her.
That was the moment my life fell apart. The day love decimated me. Turned me into the monster she called me. And now, I no longer know how to be a man.
8
Eva
As my eyes scan the words, I find myself relaxing with each sentence. The limits are easy to work with. I agree to everything, each rule and regulation except one. I know it’s a deal breaker. I know he wants and needs it. It’s time to make my choice. To decide if he’s the person that’s going to push me outside that comfort zone.
Gulping the drink he offered, I push off the sofa and make my way through the living room and out to where he’s standing. The tension emanating from him is palpable. A living breathing force that’s alive and well, threatening to consume us both.
When I step onto the terrace, I find him standing by the railing, his torso bent at the waist, his hands clutching the tumbler so hard I fear it will shatter. His gaze is trained on the city below. I wonder what he’s thinking. I can’t stop staring at him, willing him to turn to me, to look at me with those dark eyes that seem as if he’s searching for an answer that’s not there.
I’m empty. I’ve always been that way. When I was seventeen, after I’d found Carrick, he and I had a fight. I wanted him and he didn’t want me. Not in the way I asked, or rather, begged for. We’d become best friends who fucked, only, I was the one in love and he was in lust.
I ran that night, like I always do. One moment in time can obliterate everything you know about yourself, about what you think you feel. I walked into the main area of Seven Sins and found him. A man who willingly took me to one of the rooms and gave me what I needed. I asked for it and I was at peace for the first time in my life.
The next morning, Carrick forbid me to ever step foot inside the club again until I sorted myself out. That night, that man changed me, he showed me what it was like to live and die at the same time. And of course, Rick found out because he told me that someone had spoken to the stranger who’d taken me, found out what I’d asked for.
I’ve never felt the self-love people talk about. Perhaps that’s why I enjoy the darker side of sex. It’s the only thing I know. I’ve never had a man make love to me. And I’m afraid, if I ever do, I won’t survive the aftermath.
“I agree,” I tell him earnes
tly and I swear I hear him exhale. He straightens, turns, and stalks toward me. His eyes blazing, his smirk filthy and dark. “But,” I say, causing him to halt immediately. There’s a few inches of space between us which I want to close. “Tonight, I want you to take me to Sins. I want you to show me what it’s like to share. To have you do what it is you crave so much. That darkness that swirls inside you, I want you to unleash it.”
He’s silent for so long, I’m not sure he’s going to respond. Something tells me he wants to refuse me. I know why. I see it in his eyes. Fear. I’m asking him for the one thing that could possibly make me walk away from this.
“Look, if I’m meant to trust you, to submit, I’ll need you to trust me too. Give me this, it’s outside my comfort zone, it’s a limit for me at the moment and you as my Dominant need to push those limits. I want you to show me what it’s like.”
“Eva,” he finally says, pained. “I don’t think I can let you walk away. If we do this, there’s no doubt you will.”
“Trust me?” I plead. This world is one that needs to be built on trust. And if that’s not present, nothing will work between us. He reaches for me then, grips my hips and pulls me into him. Before I can say anything more, his mouth crashes down on mine, molding to me. His lips are warm, soft, and strong. Ever the commanding Master who takes rather than asks. Something about that calms me. His tongue delves into my mouth, seeking mine, testing for the submission with a simple kiss. And I give it. Freely, without reservation, only, I hold onto my heart for a moment. Just for tonight. Because if I give that to him right now, I’ll never get it back.
When he finally pulls away, I’m dizzy. “I’ll always trust you. That’s not what worries me,” he tells me earnestly.
“My submission is dependent on you giving me the benefit of the doubt. Show me my limits, break them down, and show me freedom. I give you my mind and body tonight.” He nods then, but he doesn’t smile. There’s no indication of the man who I spent the day with. Not even an inkling of the same person that made me breakfast in bed, who took me shopping for clothes, or even the man who wined and dined me last night.
No, the man who now stands before me is the monster. The dark, depraved Master of the dungeon and he’s about to lead me straight to hell.
He takes my hand, walks me into the living room and shuts the terrace door. We move through his home, directly for the bedroom where his king size bed waits for us, but we don’t make it there. Instead, he spins around, pinning me against the wall. His body is hard in all the right places, every inch of him pressed against me. Without a word, he leans in, his lips on my ear as he feathers tiny kisses along the shell, causing goosebumps to erupt all over my body.
The heat of him is breathtaking. It’s all-consuming. He steals all my thoughts as his hand grips my throat. The pads of his thumb and index finger put pressure on either side, and my vision blurs. How can he even know? My mind is a mess with questions.
This is what I want. It’s what I need. That night when I tried breath play for the first time, it was the same thing, I had an out-of-body experience. I’d never come so hard. The rough, the violent way that man had taken me was consensual, but we played it out as non-consent. And somehow, even though I’ve hidden it from everyone, Nate’s seen right through me. He’s seen my soul.
“This, sweet slut, is not a game you want to play with me,” he growls, pulling me out of my reverie. My lungs grapple for oxygen, my mind reaches for something solid, something to focus on so I don’t pass out. But Nathan doesn’t let up, he doesn’t release me.
Reaching up, I claw at his wrist, digging my nails into the smooth tanned skin of his arm. He turns his head, allowing his eyes to meet mine.
“I’m a dangerous man, Eva. If you want breath play with me, you’ll need to make sure that you give me everything. Your mind, your body…” A moment passes, just a short beat when both our hearts sync. I feel it. He feels it. And I know he’s about to ask me for the one thing I just can’t give him. “And your heart.”
Ripping his hands away, he steps back, causing me to gasp a deep breath, again and again, painfully filling my lungs with air. “You’re a fucking monster,” I cough, spluttering as I fall to my knees. My hands splay flat on the floor. When I risk looking up at him, I notice the fear still present in his gaze.
“I know.” He turns, leaving me in the bedroom still pulling in deep breaths as he makes his way to the bathroom. I wanted to play this game, this dark and dangerous game. A buzzing comes from somewhere in the bedroom and I realize it’s my phone. Scrambling to reach my bag, I pull it from the purse on the bed and swipe my finger over the screen.
“Hello?” I sound breathless; my voice is raspy.
“Bitch, are you okay?”
Savannah. Sighing, I flop onto the bed. “Yeah, I’m good. What’s up?”
“Tonight, the club? Did you forget?”
Shit. “I did, I can’t make it,” I tell her, cringing at the thought of explaining to my best friend that I’m about to submit to a man. At least, put him up for consideration. After tonight, I’ll be able to see if I can handle his world.
“Does this have anything to do with the hunk that asked for you two nights ago?” It’s been almost three days that I’ve been swept up in Nate’s world, but it feels like longer. Like weeks, months even.
“It does.”
I hear her sigh. “Do I really have to beg?”
“No, Savvie, I’m not Mason, you don’t have to beg,” I respond with a laugh. “He’s taking me to Sins tonight for a scene. We’re going to… well, I’m considering submission, and I’ve asked him to show me his worst.”
“What?” she screeches from the other end of the line. “Are you serious?”
“Yes.”
“Does Carrick know?” Her question throws me off the excitement and anxiety of what I’m about to go through tonight, and I realize I don’t want to tell Rick. Mainly because he’d try to talk me out of it. But I also don’t want him to know what’s going on in my personal life.
“No. And he doesn’t need to. Carrick Anderson doesn’t own me.”
“I’d like to see you tell him that to his face. If I’m not there, please tell me you’ll record it?” She giggles. Savannah is not a woman who giggles, but this time I have to admit, it is funny.
“Yeah, okay. I have to go. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. I’m sorry I can’t—”
“Please, gorgeous, you get your kink on. I want to hear all about it. And I’ll have a drink for you, okay? Bye,” she says and hangs up, leaving me smiling as I push off the bed.
“Eva,” Nate’s voice calls to me from the bathroom. When I turn, I find him dripping wet with a towel tied around his taut waist. Small droplets of water trail their way from his smooth toned chest, to the dips and peaks of his abs. The V muscles that point to the bulge behind the white fluffy material taunt me, and I lick my lips involuntarily. He strolls over to where I’m standing, my eyes drink him in, savoring the beauty that is Nathan Ashcroft. “I’m sorry,” he starts. “I’m an asshole. I really don’t know how to do this. To be…”
“You don’t have to apologize. I wanted it. I’ve… I’ll get ready,” I mumble, pushing past him, but he’s too quick. He grips my wrist, stopping me from making my way to the bathroom.
“Look at me, Eva.” It’s an order. I can’t disobey, so I turn to him. “What happened to you? Who hurt you?” His voice is strained. Concern filling his tone, but there’s no way I’m about to tell him about my past. The questions he poses come with the answers I can’t give him.
“If this is going to work tonight, I’ll need you to let me do it without talking about my past. Once I’ve signed the contract and that’s what you want to hear, I’ll tell you. But tonight, I’m not Eva Gallagher anymore, I’m just your sweet slut.” Ripping my hand from his grasp, I race to the bathroom, locking myself in.
I press my back against the door as I try to pull in calming breaths. My past—the ugliness, the horror. I can
’t tell him. There’s no way he’ll want me if he knew how damaged I really am.
9
Nate
Eva Gallagher. It can’t be. My mind swirls with the words she just uttered. Shock slams into my chest so painfully, I can’t breathe. Three long days I’ve known her, and I didn’t think to ask her last name. Now that she’s just spat it at me, the guilt weighs on me, dragging me into the abyss.
“Nate? Nathan!”
Her voice cuts through the turmoil. I can’t tell her. She’ll hate me.
“What’s wrong?” she demands.
She’s in front of me before I have time to react. Her body is close to mine, her hands on my shoulders. Where our skin touches feels electric. I blink repeatedly.
“Nothing,” I rasp. My voice is thick with emotion, fear that she’ll find out. This needs to end tonight. She needs to leave. I need to fucking walk away before my whole world comes crashing down because of this one woman.
“Are you sure? You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” she says quietly. “I’m sorry I freaked out, I didn’t mean to—”
“Eva, just get in the shower, please? I want to leave soon.” Her gaze implores me for more, for affection, but I can’t give it to her right now.
“Okay,” she finally appeases me, nodding.
Once I’m alone, I grip my phone and hit dial on the number that’s haunted me for far too long.
“Nathan,” she answers. Her voice is ice-cold, racing through my veins like poison.
“Why didn’t you tell me about Eva? About who she was?”
Her cackle comes from the opposite end of the line, as if she’s happy that she’s completely and utterly destroyed someone. “I sent you to humiliate her, not fall in love with her,” she tells me in her rage filled tone. “Did you, Nathan? Is this your heart or your cock talking?” Another shrill laugh echoes through the speaker, causing my blood to boil with anger.
