by April Henry
Talking about it, I still felt shaky. I had come so close to losing everyone I cared about. And in Blue’s case, we had all lost. I choked out, “I still can’t believe Blue is gone.”
Coyote’s voice was cold. “Did you ever think maybe she wouldn’t be dead if you hadn’t gotten involved?”
“What? What are you talking about?”
“If you hadn’t joined MED under false pretenses, you wouldn’t have seen the lynx. Then Hawk wouldn’t have been so desperate to stop the logging that he was willing to kill innocent people.” His eyes glittered like green glass. “Or did you even see the lynx? Did you lie about that, too?”
“Of course I saw the lynx!”
“And what about you and me?” The muscles in Coyote’s jaw were clenched so tight he had to force the words out. “Did they order you to do that, too?”
“No! What happened between you and me was real. I—I love you, Coyote.”
My words hung in the air. Coyote opened his mouth, but didn’t speak. Finally he whispered, “You love me.” It didn’t sound like a question or a challenge, but a statement of fact.
I nodded.
His voice got stronger. “But you don’t even know me.” The anger returned to his eyes. “And I don’t think I know you.”
“But I think we do know the important stuff. At least we do now.” I got up to leave. “Look, I don’t expect you to feel the same way. And I don’t expect you to do anything about it. I just wanted you to know.”
I had my hand on the doorknob when Coyote said, “Wait.”
CHAPTER FORTY
Coyote’s expression was unreadable. “You never told me what happened in the forest. Are they still logging?”
If all he wanted was facts, I could give him facts. “Gary Phelps has already made an announcement to the press. I’m not sure if it’s because he was frightened off by the bombs or because they recovered the traps with the lynx’s fur from the trunk of Blue’s car. But at least she didn’t die for nothing. Stonix has stopped the logging.”
As I talked, I realized I wasn’t sad anymore. I was angry. “Maybe you’re right,” I continued. “Maybe if I had just kept out of this, Gary Phelps and maybe a bunch of other people besides Blue would have been dead. Can’t you see I did the best I could? I just didn’t want anybody to die!”
There was a long silence. I looked up from the toes of my clogs and into Coyote’s bright green eyes.
He let out a long, shuddering sigh. “I’m sorry. Maybe I was too hard on you. I knew something was going on, but I never guessed it was that. And then when I thought that you had been doing everything on someone else’s orders, that it meant nothing, well, I . . . I guess I went off the deep end.”
“I’m still me, Coyote.” I dashed the tears from my eyes. “I’m still me.”
“You’re right,” Coyote said. “About what you said earlier. Maybe we do know the really important stuff about each other. . . . Why don’t you give me a kiss?”
“What?” I knew I had gotten through to him, but this seemed too fast.
He nodded emphatically. “Give me a kiss, Ellie.”
I took three steps toward his bed and leaned over, bracing my good hand on the wall. He put his hand on my neck and pulled me closer, turning my head so that his lips rested against my ear. “So are we being recorded now? Is this room bugged?”
I shrugged. Who was to know when it came to the FBI?
He whispered, “The fur was from the lynx in my grandfather’s basement.”
I pulled back and looked at him. He tugged me close again. “Come on. We both know the lynx is there. I just bought it some time. When the bomb under our car went off, we weren’t coming back from the forest—we were coming back from Portland. We put the fur in an extra trap, and we were going to say it came from the parcel.” Still in a whisper, Coyote added, “There’s something else. The cops gave me back my watch. They found it in the car. Only it wasn’t mine.”
My hand went unconsciously to my wrist.
“I had seen the watch before, but I didn’t tell them that. You used to wear it. And last night, when I couldn’t sleep, I played around with it a little. It has some pretty interesting features.”
Now I understood why he had been so quick to believe me about the FBI. And that he’d had hours to get angry. “You didn’t erase anything, did you?”
“I thought about it at first, but then I decided not to. Not until I heard what you had to say about everything.”
My knees went weak in relief. “Thank God! Where is it?”
He pointed with his chin. “In my bedside drawer.”
I took the watch out and strapped it on. When they had first given it to me, I had hated it. Now it felt like my armor.
Coyote’s eyes were blinking more and more slowly, like a little kid fighting sleep. “Sorry,” he said in a normal voice. He gave me a lopsided smile that nearly broke my heart. “They keep me pretty doped up.”
“I’ll let you get some rest, then.”
“Just one more kiss,” he said, even though he hadn’t kissed me the first time. I figured he was still speaking as if someone else was listening.
He hooked a finger under my chin and this time he really did bring my lips down to meet his. His mouth was soft and full. I kissed him gently, mindful of the purple bruises on his face.
A minute or an hour later I lifted my head.
“I’d better go.” When I straightened up, my head felt like it could pop off and float away. Coyote’s eyes were already closed.
Slowly, I backed out the door, eased it closed against the noise in the hall. On tiptoe, I turned away.
I stifled a gasp when I saw who was standing right behind me.
Ponytail was leaning on a cane. His navy blue sweatpants were as tight as a sausage skin over his bandaged right thigh. His skin was gray, and his eyes were shadowed. He looked ten years older than when I had seen him last.
“I need a word with you.” He laid his free hand on my arm.
I shook him off. “I don’t think so. I’m not interested in talking to you.” I didn’t bother to hide how much he pissed me off. It was all over, and I didn’t need to do what Ponytail said anymore.
“We’re going to need you to testify against Hawk and the others.”
I took a step back. “You already have all the proof you need without me. I want this to be over.”
Ponytail sneered. “It doesn’t matter what you want. We need to be able to lock up Darryl Denigan and throw away the key. And that means having you testify about building and placing the pipe bomb, about him shooting me, about all of it.”
“No. I want my normal life back. I want to forget we ever met.”
Ponytail gave his head an exaggerated shake. “Well, then, you’ll be in very big trouble, Ellie. We can charge you with arson, conspiracy and aiding and abetting. And your parents can be charged with maintaining a dwelling for the purpose of—”
I cut him off. “Come on, you already have eyewitness testimony, yours and Richter’s. I did what you wanted me to do, and now I’m done, and you’re not going to charge me or my parents with anything. And, for that matter, you’re not going to charge Coyote, either.”
Ponytail grimaced as he shifted his weight to his good leg. “You want to tell me why I shouldn’t arrest you right now?”
“Because when we were in jail and you were threatening me, I used this.” I raised my wrist. “The same watch you guys gave me.”
It gave me enormous pleasure to see the shock on his face. “What?”
I pressed a series of buttons on the watch. My own voice, tinny and small, rose up. “I’ll tell these cops the truth. I’ll tell them the FBI planted those threatening flyers, not the MEDics. I’ll tell them that you threatened me, a minor. I’ll them you wanted me to set the fire at the Hummer dealership.”
And then Ponytail’s answer. “Hey, have you noticed a bunch of people around when we meet with you? Who would be more likely to lie? FBI special agents
? Or a sixteen-year-old girl with an admitted history of arson?”
I stopped the recording and looked up at him. “If you try to make me do anything else for you, or if you try to send my parents off to jail, then I will use this recording to tear the lid off what happened. It won’t look so good that the FBI pressured an underage informant into risking her life.”
Ponytail considered this. Suddenly, his hand lashed out and slapped the wall. The sound echoed down the corridor.
“Fine!” he finally said. “Richter and I will do it without you.” He pivoted on his cane and thumped slowly down the hall.
It was over. I could go back to being me. Ellie, high school student. My parents could find another cause. Everything could go back to normal.
Only some things had changed.
I opened the door again to Coyote’s room.
He was asleep, his head turned to one side, his breathing even. I thought about waking him to tell him what had happened, but instead I decided to go give my parents the news first.
Coyote and I had a lot of time ahead of us.
