After a while he said, “What are you praying for?”
She waited until she reached the end of the final stanza before she answered. “Forgiveness for kissing you yesterday. Elder Davon would assign me a hundred repetitions of the prayer of repentance for every minute we spent in illicit contact. I figure it was at least ten minutes, so it’s going to take me a while.”
He blew out his breath. “I guess that means you changed your mind.”
She couldn’t look at him. “It’s not you. I’m sure you would have been wonderful. I just can’t.”
He shrugged. “It’s all right. It wouldn’t have been much fun if your whole heart wasn’t in it.”
His understanding was far more than she deserved. “Thanks.”
He shrugged again. For a long time they knelt together in silence. Nirel completed three more recitations of the prayer before curiosity overcame her. “What are you praying for?”
Josiah sighed and rubbed his face. “For the Mother to appear.”
Nirel jerked back. “What?”
“Don’t worry. Even if it works, she won’t come until tomorrow morning. It takes three full days of praying and fasting to summon her. Gurion Thricebound did it the first time, to ask for the powers back that she’d taken away. The Guildmaster does it every spring to get the names of that year’s apprentices. I’m doing it because Elkan wants to ask the Mother for guidance. But I don’t think I’ve been able to concentrate consistently enough to get through to her. I keep getting distracted.”
Nirel hid her shiver with a sneer. “I’d think she could appear any time she wanted to, if she’s supposed to be so powerful.”
“She probably can, but whenever she interferes directly in the world, it upsets the balance. Natural disasters happen if she does it too much, storms and earthquakes and floods. There are theories that praying and fasting weakens the boundary between our world and hers, so it’s less of a violation of the rules of nature for her to come through.”
Nirel opened her mouth to make a scathing comment, but stopped. “Hmm.”
“What?”
Reluctantly, she admitted, “I guess that’s not too different from how the Ordinances were first given. Twelve Elders prayed day and night until the Lord of Justice appeared to them. He entrusted each of them with a single month’s worth.”
Josiah snorted. “See? Your Lord of Justice is just the Mother by a different name. She can look however she wants, you know. She made herself look like the Lord of Justice the first time she talked to Vigorre, to make a point to him.”
Nirel clenched her fists and breathed until she could answer without shouting. “You’re wrong. The Lord and Lady are opposites. They’re brother and sister, so I guess it makes sense that some things about them are alike. But the Lord opposes everything the Lady stands for.”
“Like healing? And choices, and oh, I don’t know, happiness? Because his followers sure don’t seem to have any of those.”
“Shut up!” Nirel bit back her fury. “The followers of the Lady have no discipline, or order, or self-control. They do whatever gives them pleasure in the moment, no matter what the long-term harm.”
“You’d have been in trouble last night if that were true.” Josiah looked away. “Maybe even right now.”
A jolt of fierce longing went through Nirel, mingling with anger in an intoxicating brew. She clamped her mouth shut and eyes closed, forcing her mind to focus on the words of the prayer for repentance.
After a long time, when she was finally getting back some of the peace she’d experienced earlier, Josiah spoke. “I’m sorry. Hey, I’ve got an idea. Why don’t you come to my room tomorrow morning, when I’m due to wake up. Elkan’s going to be there, and Kevessa asked him to bring Gevan so he could see the Mother appear. You could see her, too, and talk to her. I’m never going to convince you she’s actually good, but maybe she can.”
Nirel sat back on her heels and stared at him. Finally she found her voice. “Why would I want to do that?”
“So you can know the truth. So you can believe in things that help you, not hurt you.” Josiah looked away, then back, his voice softening. “So there might be a chance for us to really be together. For more than just a night. If you quit trying to cling to the Faith that threw you out, maybe someday we could stand up together.”
The pictures floated before her mind’s eye, despite all her attempts to resist them. The two of them standing in the center of a circle of worshippers, pledging their commitment to each other. Long sweet days and even sweeter nights together, without shame or guilt. Children to cherish without fear, because gentle golden light could heal them whenever they were sick or injured.
Finally she fought free and banished the alluring images. They were just another sort of temptation. “I will never give up my Faith. I don’t want to see the Lady. She’s evil.”
Josiah sighed and shook his head. “I had to ask.”
“It’s no use, Josiah. You belong with Kevessa, not me. You’re both wizards. The two of you can be happy together. And I can be happy alone.”
She tried to sound confident and encouraging, even though her gut twisted with jealousy when she imagined him with Kevessa. But if she couldn’t have him, she wouldn’t begrudge him to her friend. And she couldn’t have him without giving up everything else that mattered to her.
Josiah’s eyes bored into hers until she was certain he could see her heart and know exactly what she was thinking and feeling. But eventually he nodded and turned back to focus on the silver shaft of moonlight falling through the window. It had shifted; he scooted a few inches until he was fully in its light again.
This time he prayed out loud. Nirel would have thought he was taunting her, except his voice was such a quiet pleading murmur. “Please, Mother. We need you to appear to us. We need you to tell us what to do. We need your help and your protection. Please, please, I’m begging you. Come to us here, now, so we can see you and hear what you have to say—”
A figure coalesced from the moonlight, walking toward them as if from a long distance away. Josiah made a strangled sound and grabbed for Nirel’s hand. Nirel clutched him, shock and terror and wonder churning in her stomach.
The woman remained dim and misty, wavering as if seen through a curtain of water. “Sar,” she said, her voice commanding. “Open a window. Elkan’s bedroom, right now.”
Sar shoved against Josiah’s side. Josiah threw his arm around the donkey’s neck. He pulled his hand from Nirel’s and held it out, stammering, “Mother, um, are you sure? I mean—”
A spark of gold appeared over his palm and swelled into a sphere. The center cleared to show a dark room, a couple tucked in bed, twined together, deeply asleep.
“Watch,” the woman ordered. “You’ll know what to do.” She vanished.
“Mother, I don’t under—” Josiah started.
The door of the bedroom opened. A man with a dark bundle in his arms crept toward the bed. He hissed, “Master Elkan, wake up! My mother and the Autarch are about to blow up the Mother’s Hall. You’ve got to stop them.”
* * *
Elkan jolted out of a sound sleep to find a man’s shape looming over him in the darkness. He threw himself between the threat and Meira, reaching to shove him away. Tobi!
The man jerked back. Elkan recognized Tenorran’s voice. “Master Elkan, please, you’ve got to do something!”
Elkan relaxed a fraction, although he still protected Meira with his body. She peered over his shoulder. “What are you doing here, Tenorran?”
Tobi’s voice came faintly into his mind. What’s wrong? I’ll come as quickly as I can, but I’m nearly a mile away.
Tenorran spoke over both of them, his words so rapid and panicked Elkan could barely understand them. “It’s my mother and the Autarch. They’re going to destroy the Mother’s Hall and kill all the wizards. Please, there’s got to be some way to stop them.”
Elkan rolled out of bed and groped for his breeches, dragging th
em on as he spoke. “Tenorran. Slow down. Tell me exactly what they’re doing.” Tobi, get here now!
Tenorran drew a long shuddering breath and spoke more clearly. “Commodore Benarre buried hundreds of barrels of Secret in the basement of the Mother’s Hall, under the floor. We dug a tunnel to the park, long enough to extend past your range so no one inside the building would be able to stop us from firing into it. We filled it with straw and oily rags and more barrels of Secret. At the end we built a gallows to hide the opening.”
Raw wood and dangling bodies. Elkan shoved the memory away. “Where your mother’s camp is?”
“She’s cleared everyone out. One good hit will ignite the target. The Autarch’s going to use his catapult and clinging fire.”
Elkan scrambled into his tunic and boots, mind racing. How long would it take him to reach the Mother’s Hall and the park beyond it? He and Tobi should be able to deflect the catapult’s shots if they got there soon enough. Although if they missed even one…
On the far side of the bed, Meira was pulling on her clothes. She fumbled with the buckles of her hook. “I’ll go with you. I can rouse the Hall while you’re shielding the target.”
“No!” The thought of her running into the deadly trap filled his gut with ice and drained the strength from his muscles. He couldn’t bear to let her take such a risk. But she’d never listen to an appeal to her own safety. He forced his voice to something approaching steadiness. “You can’t leave Ravid here alone. And you certainly can’t take him with you.”
She faltered, her expression torn. “Someone has to wake the rest of the wizards. If you’re not able to keep it from going off, they might be able to channel the force of the blast out the tunnel.”
“Tenorran can do it.” He turned to the Ramunnan. “Will you?”
Tenorran wore much the same expression Meira did. He looked down at the bundle in his arms. “I can’t—”
For the first time Elkan focused on what he was holding. “What in the Mother’s—”
“I couldn’t leave Adrenna behind.” Tenorran arms tightened around the sleeping baby. “My mother will never forgive me for this. I never would have seen her again.”
Elkan dragged a hand through his hair. “Then I’ll have to go to the Hall.” He’d lose precious moments explaining to the wizard on night duty what must be done, but once the flaming projectiles started raining down, it should become obvious. “I can send someone else to divert the shots while I rally enough wizards and familiars to respond if there’s an explosion.”
How many would it take to have a chance against the tremendous force so much blasting powder would release? He pictured Gevan’s graphs, showing how dramatically the strength of the Mother’s power declined with distance. The whole guild might not be enough if they remained several floors away. But if they could make it down to the basement in time, only a few should be sufficient.
Only one, if it came to that.
Horror and shattering grief swept through him, followed more swiftly than he would have believed possible by calm, cold resolve. He seized Meira and kissed her hard. “I’m sorry. I love you. But I may have to—”
She touched his cheek. “Go. Do whatever it takes.”
Tobi, hurry! “If there’s any other way—”
I’m running as fast as I can!
“I know. Go!”
Elkan crushed her close an instant longer, then released her and strode toward the door, pushing past Tenorran. Adrenna whimpered.
A terrified wail spit the night. Meira gasped, “Ravid!”
The door crashed open and men poured in, drawn blades glinting in the moonlight. “Everyone stay where you are. One wrong move and I kill the boy.”
The man who spoke held a writhing, kicking, screaming Ravid. When a cuff to his head only increased the volume, the soldier clamped a hand over his mouth.
Elkan froze. Meira made a strangled sound. Tenorran clutched Adrenna. The soldiers surrounded them, weapons poised to strike. Their leader called, “It’s secure, your majesty.”
Verinna swept into the room, flanked by more soldiers with lanterns. Elkan squinted against the sudden brightness. He couldn’t see the smug satisfaction on Verinna’s face, but he heard it in her voice. “Your cat is welcome to try to rescue you, Master Elkan, but you might inform her we’ve got this house surrounded by archers ready to fill her with arrows.”
He squeezed his eyes shut. Tobi, stay away. Go to the Hall, warn them—
Verinna’s voice overrode his thoughts. “And the Mother’s Hall, as well. To prevent anyone getting in. Or out.”
Despair engulfed him. He peered at her, trying to see her face, trying to understand. “Why are you doing this, Verinna? Whatever I did to offend you, I beg your forgiveness. Call off your attack and we can discuss your grievance. Tane, too; Tenorran said he was with you in this. I’m sure we can work something out.”
“Thanks to your skilled mediation, the Autarch and I have reached an accord. We both agree that wizards are too dangerous to be allowed to exist any longer. Together we’ll wipe you out before you can rob us of our power.”
“I swear, we don’t threaten your power. We only want to help you.”
“By your very nature you’ll destroy us, no matter what your intentions. I’m sorry, Master Elkan. I wish there were some other way.” She eyed him, then shifted her attention to Meira and Ravid. “I think our hostages are sufficient to ensure your cooperation for the moment. I’d keep you as my own personal healer if your cat weren’t so difficult to manage. I’ll have to pick some other wizard sleeping outside the Hall tonight whose beast is easier to control.”
A flash of orange light spilled through the window. She walked over and looked out. “Tane’s catapults aren’t as accurate as my weapons, but he’ll hit the target soon enough.” She went to Tenorran and took Adrenna from his arms. Her son tightened his jaw but didn’t resist. “Escort them to my ship.”
Tobi’s voice in his mind was laced with panic. What should I do? Maybe I could ambush—
We can’t risk Ravid. There was little chance he or his familiar would come out of this alive, but he would do everything in his power to save Meira and her son.
What about the wizards in the Hall? How do we warn them?
I don’t think we can. Numb horror paralyzed him. His mind darted frantically for any escape, but found none. Run, far away. Maybe you can save yourself, at least.
No! I won’t leave you! I—
A voice whispered through Tobi’s mind into Elkan’s, familiar and beloved even though he’d only heard it twice before. Josiah is watching.
Hope bloomed in his heart. Josiah and Sar were inside the Hall. If somehow the Mother had directed them to watch this scene in a window, they’d have heard what Tenorran said. They could stop the blast.
How much time did they have? Another orange burst from the window made that clear. Very little. Maybe enough to make it to the basement, but probably not enough to recruit help.
Elkan took a deep breath. He knew what he had to say. The Matriarch wouldn’t understand, but Josiah would.
He tried to put into his voice all his love, and trust, and pride. His acceptance of the final duty they both owed as wizards. His grief that his apprentice was called on to carry it out when he couldn’t. His faith that Josiah would be equal to the task. His belief that what would be gained was worth the terrible cost.
“Josiah. Right here. Right now. Like this.”
* * *
Nirel stared at the Guildmaster’s stricken face as he spoke the cryptic words. A blaze of orange light flared through the room. The ring of golden sparkles over Josiah’s hand vanished.
He grabbed her shoulders and spoke urgently into her face. “Wake up everyone you can find. Warn them what’s going to happen. Send them to join us in the basement. Fast! We haven’t got much time.”
He released her and bolted from the room. Sar charged after him. Footfalls and hoofbeats clattered in the hallway and echo
ed from the stairwell, receding downward.
Surely Josiah and Sar alone couldn’t block the force of hundreds of barrels of blasting powder. Unless she did what he’d asked and sent other wizards to help, the hidden cache would explode. The entire Mother’s Hall would be destroyed.
Every wizard and familiar in the Hall would die. The Matriarch and the Autarch would hunt down the rest and exterminate them. The Lady’s power would be wiped from the world again, this time forever. The Lord of Justice would triumph.
If anything could win back his favor, this would.
Nirel’s heart thudded in her ears. For a long moment she didn’t move. Then she sank to her knees, closed her eyes, and silently recited the prayer of repentance.
Sixty
It was as if all my life I’d been asking where, and when, and how, and she finally answered. Right here, right now, like this…
Josiah hurtled down the stairs, Elkan’s words ringing in his mind. That’s how his master had felt when he’d begged Sar to burn him out in order to save the people trapped by the flood. Josiah vividly remembered the wonder and anguish in his face when he’d said it.
This time a single life wouldn’t be enough. If no other wizards joined them in time, it was going to take every scrap of energy in both his body and Sar’s to save the hundreds obliviously sleeping above.
He staggered to a halt in the dark basement, grabbing for Sar. “Open a window to when they were burying the powder so we can see where they put it.” He hated to spend the energy, but it had only been a couple of months, and they needed to know what they were dealing with.
The donkey popped open a small window and raced through days and weeks. There.
The image focused on a crew of sweaty Ramunnans laboring with shovels by lantern light. It swept through the basement and through time, condensing days of toil into a few blurred seconds.
“Blast it!” The aptness of the curse might have been funny in other circumstances. “They put it along the walls. When it goes off, they’ll crumble, and the whole Hall will collapse.”
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