by T R Tells
Then the van drove off, with my friends inside.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
The hollowness of my heart weighed heavily on my soul, leaving me unaware of the time passing. I couldn’t get the image of my friends, bound out of my head. I kept recalling my uncle’s words and the words that I’d heard throughout several weeks. How could I rally people together and find a way to their hearts with the truth when I couldn’t even help my best friends through their own negativity?
I couldn’t be of use to anyone when I was nothing but a burden…
I didn’t know when sleep had overtaken me.
My eyes fluttered open, and I found myself in the same blue room that I woken in when Alina had kidnapped me. Instead of the bed, my body was sprawled across a white loveseat.
The child, Elsaf Geima, was sitting on the blue checkered floor, their back was to me, and they were doing something with their hands.
“Oh, good, you’re up—you’ve been asleep for some time now.”
I sat up from the couch and rested my feet on the floor.
“If you haven’t noticed, my life is utter shit right now. There’s too many stakes, risks, and people I know that I’m losing. My brain feels like it's fried, and I don’t know what to do.”
Elsaf turned around while still sitting cross-legged and grinned. They were holding a book.
“For someone who is supposed to have this view of ‘fighting the unjust,’ you sure have a negative outlook on things. Whatever you feel, you’ll put out negatively; Apathy has a way of spreading like that.”
I frowned. They weren’t helping.
“You do realize that I’m only human, right?”
Elsaf shrugged and continued to flip through the book, their eyes darting across the page.
“What are you reading anyway?”
Elsaf looked up from the book and grinned at me. “You don’t know? It’s a very intriguing story, but I’m afraid it won’t have an ending because the author is struggling.”
For some reason, I had a feeling they were talking about me.
“Then maybe you can tell me what the hell I’m supposed to do, because I’m tired of trying to figure it out when all I really want is to do is—”
“Give up? Oh, how the mighty have fallen.”
I crossed my arms over my chest and narrowed my eyes at them.
“I didn’t say that. Is it so bad to want things to be normal, like how they used to be? I’m always exhausted, but I can’t do what I want because there are people out there who have given up already, and things are only getting worse. I can’t even live a normal life because stupid bad guys will eventually want to take everything humanity has left.”
Elsaf closed the book and rested their chin on their fist as they looked at me.
“So what are you complaining about? You know what you should do, and you know that you can’t do it alone. So what’s the—”
“—I don’t know how to help everyone!” I shouted at the top of my lungs. I sighed and got up from the couch to pace. “I act like I know what I’m doing, and I try to say the right things to people who are victims of Apathy. I try to do the right thing from my knowledge of the world...”
Tears collected in my eyes, blurring my vision.
“...But I’m just as lost, and I don’t know if what I’m doing will help in the end or make things worse.”
I stopped pacing and tightened my hands into fists. The tears rolled down my cheeks, and a quiet sob left my lips.
A soft hand pressed against my fist, and I looked down at the blurry image of Elsaf staring up at me.
“Isn’t that the flawed hero people need? You’re overthinking, Hira, and the answers are right in front of you. Don’t be the hero, just be there, and people will follow eventually. Incidentally, if you show people the truth, they will follow, but they must do the work themselves.”
I sniffed and rubbed my eye.
“And what is the truth? How am I able to reach people’s hearts effectively so they can help themselves see their path?”
“Every decision that we make in life, good and bad, have been shaped by our thoughts alone. Even if those decisions caused hard blows in your life, understanding that with hope, courage, knowledge, and togetherness you can be free to take charge of your destiny and free yourself from the cycle of fear, worry, or negativity. If the path laid before you hinders, change it. You are in control of your fate, and with the effort of yourself and those around you, anything can be achieved.”
Elsaf backed away from me and smiled.
“Until you awaken that power inside of you and accept yourself, and the events that led up today, you’ll never be able to enter the hearts of those who walk the beaten path.”
Their image and that of the room slowly began to fade away. My eyes were starting to droop, and as if on autopilot, my body drifted back to the couch. My eyes fluttered closed, surrounding me in darkness.
***
My phone started buzzing on my nightstand. I groggily lifted it to see Alessander’s name on the screen. I pressed the button to answer the call:
“Alessander, what’s going on?”
There was shuffling, and a voice in the background that made my stomach flip. I lifted from the bed and pressed the phone closer to my ear.
“Alessander, who is that?” I asked. My heart was thumping in my chest. I pulled the covers from off my body and swung my legs off the bed so I could get dressed.
“It’s Veronica, she’s here,” he said. There was tightness in his tone that I recognized as an annoyance or even anger.
I had to push back the bile that threatened to come up my throat. “What is she doing there?” It took all my strength not to punch something.
“It’s about the baby. She wants to speak with us both.”
I frowned. The baby? Why would she want to speak with me too?
I got up from the bed, headed toward my closet, and put on some clothes.
“I’ll be there soon. Where are you now?”
“I’m home. My parents are out. She must’ve been watching when they would leave. I thought about calling the cops, but I figured that wouldn’t do any good, and she would keep coming back. I want this shit over with, and it starts by settling this whole entire affair. She’s out on the patio deck. I’m not going back out there until you get here.”
I had never heard the strict tone in Alessander’s voice before. I could only imagine the stern look on his face.
“I know you’ve gone through a lot, Hira, we both have, and losing our friends has definitely been a low point for us, but—”
“No, I get it,” I told him. “We have to get through this together, and maybe we can work through this instead of spreading further negativity.”
“Okay, I’ll see you soon, Ira.”
“Oh,” I started to say. “It’s the wrong time, and I’m sorry for not telling you sooner, but there’s something you should know about Veronica…”
***
I got out of the Lyft when it pulled up to Alessander’s driveway, and I knocked on the front door, followed by ringing the doorbell. The cold wind stung my cheeks, and I pulled my coat closer around my body. I would have been boiling over with anger because Veronica still couldn’t get the hint, but the cold that threatened to freeze my insides were distracting.
The door from the other side clicked, and Alessander stood holding it open. I walked inside and removed my jacket.
“Is she still in the back?”
We stood in the living room, but Alessander took my hand and led me toward the middle to sit on the suede couch. He tightened his grip. I furrowed my brows and followed his thumb tracing the back of my hand. Looking into his eyes when I met them, there was a forlorn expression that made my spine shiver.
“Alessander, what is it?”
A heavy sigh escaped his lips, and he ran his fingers through his hair before meeting my gaze.
“You know I never wanted this to begin with, Hira. I never
wanted the past to ruin the future we would have together.”
I nodded and placed my hand on top of his. My heart was pounding hard in my chest. I was afraid that it would burst, anticipating what it was he was trying to tell me.
“I know, and none of this is your fault. The circumstances that played out are just really, really messed up.”
“And coincidental from what you told me.” There was a knowing look in Alessander’s eyes that made me tilt my head to the side. “I don’t know if Veronica would have turned out differently had this cult not kidnapped her, but the fact is she’s carrying a child. However it was created, she’s going to be taking care of it.”
I frowned. “What are you saying?”
He sighed again, “I’m saying... no matter what obstacle is in front of Veronica, she’ll keep trying to get me one way or another. I don’t want her, far from it, but I do know that the child inside of her didn’t ask to be here. She tried to threaten me. I can’t imagine a young child being under her care, forced to do the same thing.”
Oh.
“So, it’s like we’re just giving her what she wants in the end.” I knew I was stubborn, and that wasn’t what he meant, but the fact of being around Veronica and now a baby was something that I couldn’t stomach.
“Please, Ira, it’s not like that all,” Alessander pleaded, looking into my eyes. “I love you, and that’s why I want you to do this with me. It’s why she wants you here. She knows that I will never truly want to be around her, and if you agree, it makes it seem like she has her way, but she won’t because we’ll always be a step ahead of her.
“Everything up to this point has been forced upon me or controlled without my say so. But this is one thing, even if it isn’t much, that I can control. She can think, fantasize, or use her powers any kind of way she likes because that will never change how I feel about you. If I can help that unborn child from a life that we both know is a dark path and with you by my side, I know that we can get through this together.”
I pursed my lips and looked down at our entwined hands.
Our paths coming together to change the course of our fates to see our truth.
I looked up to meet his gaze and huffed, pulling my lips into a smile.
“Okay, where is she?”
Alessander led me out to the patio deck, where Veronica was leaning on the banister. I couldn’t see her stomach from the way she was turned, but I noticed that her hips had extended and she was thicker than she was before. My throat tightened at the thought of ‘caring’ for her unborn child. Still, when I thought about what things the cult might have forced upon or taught her over the years, it made me realize she may very well illustrate the same teachings.
I was sure she wouldn’t put the child in harm’s way, but what she could be telling them could just be as detrimental and dangerous as putting its life in danger. I couldn’t in good conscience allow that to happen.
She would never have Alessander, neither of us would have that. She would take what she would get and nothing more.
“Veronica Avarice, or perhaps I should call you ‘Ronnie’?”
Veronica spun around her heels, her hair falling off her shoulders. The expression on her face twisted, and she tilted her head to the side.
“What did you just call me?” she asked, stepping toward me. She was wearing a long-sleeve black sweater and a tunic dress, with gray leggings on her legs. My eyes widened when I saw how large her stomach had extended before meeting her gaze.
“I know about you, the cult; The Dark Ordinance, and how they kidnapped and tricked people into joining their forces.”
Veronica raised her brow and crossed her arms over her chest as best as she could with her stomach in the way.
“Okay, and?”
I frowned.
“‘Okay, and?’ is all you have to say? Those people are bad news, and they’ve been doing this shit for years. They manipulate people, young people, into giving their life to the ‘Great One’, Acedia. I’ve seen your missing papers, and I know that you were taken away from your family.”
Veronica shook her head, chuckling, but the smile did not reach her eyes.
“My gosh, do you ever stop talking?” she complained and walked back inside the house, so we were in the interior of the patio. I turned around and shut the screen door. “Do you always believe the concept of ‘good’ and ‘evil’ is only that? Just because something is called ‘evil’, does it really make it such?”
I narrowed my eyes at her, wondering what she was getting at.
“The last time I checked ‘cult’ was always a bad thing, and kidnapping is obviously wrong.”
Veronica took a seat in one of the chairs against the wall and leaned her back against it.
“And has it ever occurred to you to ask ‘why’ things are the way they are?”
I snorted. “Not when there are Umbra Shades threatening to seep into the souls of the innocent born in a corrupt society. They should not be crucified and drained of their life.”
“And has it occurred to you that the world needs to be cleansed because of corrupt society? Even if there are a few unfortunate weak-willed souls that can’t control their desires, should we not punish them for being weak and persecute those who need to be punished?”
I shivered. I couldn’t help but recall similar words from Trey.
“Yes, they should get what they deserve, but not to the point where we’re just like them!”
Veronica rolled her eyes and sighed.
“Oh my gosh, this is what I’m talking about,” she exclaimed with an outstretched arm to me. “This is that ‘holier than thou’ bullshit I’m talking about. You convince yourself that what you’re doing is for the good of humanity. You’re only putting off the inevitable.”
I crossed my arms and glared at her.
“Yeah? Is that what that ‘Father’ has taught you?”
There was something in the way her face twitched and shoulders tighten that made me believe the leader had some kind of effect on her.
“Look,” I continued, “I might not know a whole great deal of what to do, but I’m coming to terms that I know I can’t be the savior or guide anyone until they help themselves. They have to be strong enough to push themselves free of their fears, to overcome their flaws, and then they’ll be able to make the life they want to live. If I can show that side of positivity, the rest will follow suit.”
Veronica leaned forward, grinning, and gave me several slow caps.
“Wow, look at you, learning something new. You know, I’ve noticed you’ve changed a lot. Now, what do you expect to do with all this newfound information? You can’t possibly think you’ll be able to stop the Dark Ordinance.”
“I’ve got backup, I’m sure you’ve heard of the Awakeners Society.”
Her sucking her teeth indicated that she knew very well who they were.
“But I’ll get to them later; right now, the only problems irking my nerves are Alina Mulgrave and you.”
She furrowed her brows and glared at me.
“And what is it that I did to get your panties in a bunch?”
I stepped closer to her, so we were only a foot apart.
“You’ve wanted Alessander since you got here, and you’ve shown your true colors more than once. You wanted to see me, right? And talk about the pregnancy?”
She didn’t say anything, but I knew that I was on the right track.
“Alessander and I already talked. Yes, he and I will be there for the baby. You may think you’ve won and that you have him, but like I told you before, you’ll never understand love. And I pity that. Whether or not you agree with me, ‘Father’ stole whatever love you had away from you. He’s brainwashed you into thinking otherwise.”
Veronica jumped out of her seat. She was fuming, and her hands were clenched into fists. “How about you stop talking about him? You don’t know the things he’s done for me or anyone. What he’s doing is for the good of the world, even if you o
r no one else sees it. You don’t know the things he’s gone through. The world is a cruel and vindictive place, you can either curl up in a hole, or you can rise above it all. He saved me from a life of misery and pain, for you to talk about him is unacceptable.”
She was trembling, and her eyes were watery. I wasn’t sure if it was the hormones or if it was something else. Whoever the cult leader was meant so much more to her. I despised Veronica, but right now, in this instant, she was like the many people who had negativity in their life and didn’t know how to get through it.
I stepped forward, closing the space between us.
“What if, like the world, he was only telling you what you wanted to hear?”
I reached out to take her hand and immediately a surge of pain shot through my skull. There was an illuminating light, and flashes of images bombarded my mind. I couldn’t make heads or tails out of any of them. I noticed several were of Veronica, recognizing how she looked from the photo.
I had a feeling these images were memories, as I saw Veronica surrounded by strange men and women. Before I could see further, Veronica wrenched her arm out of my grasp, and she shoved me backward. Despite the tears in her eyes, there was anger as she backed away from me.
“You will never understand me. You can try to save people all you want, but you can’t save anyone that didn’t ask or want to be saved.”
A sharp pang in my chest made me flinch at her words, but it was Veronica’s yelp that pulled me out of my thoughts and go to her side. She was clutching her stomach as she hissed in pain, then fell to her knees.
“Veronica, what’s wrong!”
“The baby,” she hissed, her hair covering her face so I couldn’t see. “Something is wrong.”
And from underneath Veronica’s tunic, black tendrils squirmed out, similar to an Umbra Shade’s tentacles.
My eyes widened. “Alessander!”
The baby was coming, but it wasn’t coming alone.
As soon as I removed Veronica’s tights off of her, the tendrils sprouted from her body. The clawed hands gripped the ground as she lay on the floor. My eyes widened at the spiked tentacles that were seemingly trying to drag themselves out.
