Imperfect Consequences

by Piper Stone

  He moved toward her. “Did you write your word down?”

  “Yes. You?” Why the question was sheepish she wasn’t certain. Was she embarrassed for him to hear?

  “Of course. I will play along.”

  The statement didn’t so much catch her off guard as the words pissed her off. She closed the distance and gripped his arm. “If you’re just going through the motions, you’re going to hurt us more.”

  “I know that. I’m only kidding.”

  Of course, Shannon knew he wasn’t kidding completely. He’d never liked other men telling him what to do. “Let’s go. If you don’t want to have dinner with everyone, that’s fine.”

  “No, dinner will be good for both of us. Simple relaxation time is always nice.” David held out his arm.

  She took his arm and heard her cell phone ring. Whoever was calling could wait. The phone hadn’t stopped ringing and she suspected Jameson was pushing her for an answer, no matter what he’d said about waiting. While she’d been very clear when she’d be willing to say anything, she knew the man. His intentions had been pointed out very clearly to her. And there was no way she was going to tell David a single thing. None. Not right now anyway. She needed this time away from Mark, Jameson, the job, etc. Somehow, the term sexual harassment continued to filter in the back of her mind. She’d have to deal with the man later. Much later.

  She wasn’t planning on talking to anyone from the office or even any of her friends about the trip or her troubles with either man. Her raging stupidity, on so many levels, was bad enough. There was no way she’d let anyone know what had happened over the last week or so. Embarrassment. That seemed to be the new word of her life. Perhaps that was the word she should have scribbled on the piece of paper. Why she’d debated the word for a full hour she wasn’t certain, but admitting her faults was so tough.

  “Are you ready?” David asked when they stepped out the door.

  “You mean to learn more, study the lifestyle? Yes.” To face my fears. Hell no.

  “Good. I’m not kidding about any of this. I want you to understand I’m completely serious.”

  Smiling, Shannon nodded. This was the truthful man, the one she’d fallen in love with.

  They said nothing as they followed a path to a tent set up with a podium and chairs. They seemed to be the last to arrive and eased onto chairs in the back. They waited for a good five minutes before a slender blue light lit up the staging area. When Stephen walked onto the stage, he glowed in the luminescent shimmer. “Fascinating.”

  “Pompous. He thinks he’s a super star.”

  “In a way, he is,” Shannon countered. “You read the pamphlets. Open mind.”

  “We are all humans of our own design, our own destiny. Tonight, you begin embracing the men and women you are,” Stephen said with confidence, yet he kept his head lowered.

  “Amen.”

  “So good.” Members of the audience murmured, a few claps scattered throughout.

  “The men and women we are,” Shannon said under her breath. She slipped her arm under David’s, making certain their fingers intertwined. She needed his strength always, but perhaps she needed his openness more. David would call the concept his vulnerability, which he absolutely loathed.

  “Yes.” Stephen stepped into the shimmering light. “I’m going to ask you a series of questions I want you to answer out loud without thinking about it. Don’t allow your thoughts to interfere. Don’t hesitate for even one second. This is all about total honesty. Now, let me ask you the first question. Do you believe in your heart that entering into a domestic discipline lifestyle is the best decision you made for your relationship?”

  “Yes!”

  Shannon nodded, the word said easily. She heard David’s admittance and took comfort.

  “Do you believe you’d no longer be together without having DD in your life?” Stephen continued.

  The same resounding yes was whispered from what seemed like everyone. This time, she heard more conviction in David’s voice and realized she was shivering.

  “Good.” Stephen crossed the stage. “Do you completely trust yourself in the decisions made with this regard?”

  There was minor hesitation, but everyone said yes.

  “All right,” Stephen said casually as he moved to the other side of the stage. “Do you completely trust your partner to make the right decisions?”

  This time, the hesitation was evident. Shannon opened her mouth, certain of her reply. Neither she nor David answered. She turned her head and for a minute, there was no one else in the room.

  Stephen moved to the edge of the stage and gazed down, his eyes remaining open wide as the lights lifted to a light shade of blue. “Very good. We’re making progress. The questions are getting tougher.” Another hesitation. “Do you believe your partner has your best interest at heart?”

  “Yes.”

  “Sometimes.”

  “At times,” the words were Shannon’s. She shook her head when she realized she’d said them. She heard the same kind of grumbling all throughout the crowd.

  “That’s what you think?” David didn’t seem shocked. In fact, he sounded resigned.

  “I don’t know,” she whispered.

  “Yeah. I think you do,” he countered and rose to his feet along with the rest of the crowd.

  Shannon did the same and suddenly, she was already exhausted, unsure of being here.

  “We all worry about whether or not our significant other truly understands what we go through. The truth is they can’t know us as people inside unless we tell them. Right?” Stephen pounded his chest, the timbre of his voice rising. Placing one hand behind his ear, he nodded. “Right?”

  “Yes!”

  Shannon shivered. The man was right.

  “Then what we must do is tell our spouses the truth, no matter what. That’s what has to happen. If we want them to know us, we have to be honest.” Stephen allowed the words to sink in. “We’ve all done something wrong in our lives or with regard to our relationships. We’ve all kept a secret or made a promise we couldn’t keep.” His eyes swept the room, his gaze locking on one person or another.

  “Interesting words,” David chimed in.

  “He’s right,” Shannon whispered.

  “Many of us have had affairs or hurt our significant other either by lying or going behind their backs.” Stephen sucked in his breath. “And we’ve all had regrets, realizing we need to be punished or must discipline another. I give you now two very important words. Respect and redemption.”

  The two words reverberated throughout the room. Murmurs moved through the crowd swiftly and everyone seemed in awe.

  Shannon could tell David had the same reaction as she had – they were both quivering. The words said to each other in anger were now being used in this fashion. My God.

  Stephen pushed one fist into the palm of his other hand for effect. “We must have respect for ourselves to admit our wrongdoings and we must have respect for our partner to admit the truth. When we find and honor respect, we can begin the journey into redemption. There are many forms, but they all must start with communication in order to rebuilt trust. Trust, as we all know, is vital.” Stephen slipped into the shadows.

  Shannon breathed out. The words were so very true, and they haunted her, reminded her how much she’d hurt David over the years. She reached out for his hand, fearful he’d pull away. When he wrapped his tightly around hers, she moaned softly.

  “Respect. I agree with that.” David inched closer.

  From what had to be a speaker system came Stephen’s booming voice.

  “Pull out the slip of paper I asked you to bring and hold the paper in your hand. Just hold it. Feel it. Know it. Live the word you asked yourself.”

  She already had the paper in her hand. Now she was utterly terrified of saying the single word out loud.

  “Read the word to yourself then turn to your partner, saying the word together. Remember, every relationship is about t
wo people, two entities and two souls. Trust begins with communication and communication begins with total honesty.”

  Cold inside, Shannon looked down slowly, attempting to focus on the word she’d written in the dim lighting. Of course, she remembered what she’d written. Of course, she knew what she was terrified of, but even thinking the word was stilling. Yet, she did.

  David gripped her arm, guiding her around to face him. “Are you ready?”

  “Yes, I… I think so.” Lifting her chin, she could see mist in his eyes.

  He opened his mouth. “Atonement.”

  “Abandonment.”

  By the look of surprise on each other’s faces, neither had been expecting the answer – the greatest fear.

  “Now you can begin on your endless journey with an understanding that you must face this fear as well as many others. I challenge you both tonight after sharing a festive feast with what will become your new friends, to begin this chapter with explaining the fear. You must tell each other why. Tomorrow, I’m going to post times I want to see you together as a couple. Then I’ll decide how best to service your needs. Thank you all for coming.”

  As they stood studying each other, looking into each other’s eyes, Shannon had the distinct impression they were truly seeing each other for the first time – unmasking the man and woman held captive. For they were not the people they portrayed. They were nothing more than shells.

  Chapter 7

  “You’re a non-believer.”

  The voice was husky yet, filled with amusement. David turned. Seeing Stephen standing in bare feet, a beer in his hand, and a light cotton shirt instead of what had to be silk from before was surprising. Maybe he simply wanted the standoffish personality in order to maintain the fact he truly couldn’t stand the troll. Sure, the man spoke well, looked damn good in casual attire that cost more than most of his suits, but that wasn’t enough to convince him. And the asshole had seen right through him. “That obvious?”

  Tick. Tock.

  David did indeed grow more curious as the seconds, then minutes, passed by. The man was a cool cucumber.

  “Mr. Parker, I’ve spent close to twelve hours a day usually six days a week studying people. Their actions and words, as well as the decisions they make in their lives are very intriguing to me. I’m paid very well to be right.” Stephen turned his head and tipped his beer. “You certainly have no love lost for those who consider themselves experts.”

  “No, that’s very true.”

  “I’m not here to try and sway you, but you are here with your lovely wife for a reason. You need my help, so I assume you want to continue with the sessions. In fact, I personally think you need the sessions more than Shannon does.”

  The words weren’t phrased in a question. They were stated as if the good doctor had peeled away the thinning mask, the one barely holding David together at times. Maybe the series of questionnaires were more telling than he realized. “We’re here together. As a couple. As a loving, married couple.”

  “Ah.” A slight smirk crossed Stephen’s face.

  “Ah? I’m certain you meet lots of different kinds of people in this place, but I assure you, Shannon and I are just fine.” The moment David said the words, he wanted to suck them back in. The doctor was merely stripping the layers back one by one. Okay, so the guy was good. “Yes, we’re here because we need some help. I need some help in dealing with how to be the best Head of Household I can be.”

  “Because you shared more of a vanilla relationship?”

  “Mostly.”

  “Or because you’re both afraid of committing to the lifestyle?” Stephen turned to face him. He leaned against a palm tree and nodded toward the ocean. “You very much know already how difficult the change can be and has been for both of you. Your wife was very candid about her concerns, also expressing what she thought was yours.”

  “And she said what exactly?”

  He shook his head. “Not for me to say. That’s the entire point of being here. Whether you believe in the teachings I’m sharing with you, not preachings by the way, or whether you have doubts, you came here of your own free will.”

  “True enough.”

  “Then you want your relationship to work, yes?” Stephen took a sip of his beer.

  “Very much so.” David found himself trembling at the thought. Of course, he did. He wasn’t doubting needing help. He was just concerned that this guy was too slick. “Relationships aren’t easy, and I can’t seem to mix what was with what is.”

  “Oh, I know very well relationships aren’t easy. Four wives and two daughters later, and I find myself still unsure of how women will react.”

  David laughed. “Not very good in the marriage department?”

  “I suck as a husband, DD or not. I had two very vanilla and two involved domestic discipline, and I still, to this date, can’t get what went wrong,” Stephen mused. “But I assure you, my exes tell me all the time.”

  ‘Women.”

  “Women.”

  David raised his glass, the bourbon far too smooth for the rather difficult discussion they were supposed to have that evening. “And I for one couldn’t live without mine.” Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Shannon at the edge of the water, her long hair trailing in the breeze as she used her hands in an animated fashion. Whatever story she was telling had a solid eight people fawning over every word.

  Stephen lifted his bottled beer. “Shannon is one beautiful woman.” He followed David’s gaze. “And a very strong-willed woman, I assume.”

  “You have no idea. She makes me crazy in every language in the universe.”

  “One so vivacious must be a challenge.” As he said the words, he looked back toward David. “You’re up for the challenge, David. You’re a strong man. You simply need a push in the right direction. The DD relationship is not something you can adapt to overnight. You’re going to make mistakes. We all have, including me. I’m not an expert. I’ve simply lived the life on both sides, meaning good and bad, the extreme highs and lows.”

  “We seem to have more lows than anything.” David couldn’t take his eyes off her. She was indeed a gorgeous woman. She’d stolen his heart the very first time he saw her.

  “Let me offer you a single piece of advice, one I certainly should’ve taken myself.”

  David sighed as he noticed the way she was trying to locate where he was. She did love him. No, she had to love him. Why would she love him? She thought he was going to abandon her. And he pretty much told her he was going to retaliate because of a situation he had no real understanding of. The damn truth was so far removed from what she thought. “I’m listening.”

  “Women need honesty more than they need anything. They don’t care, at the end of the day, how much money you make or how many bobbles you give them. They see so many gifts as an admittance of something, some betrayal. Just talk with her. Tell her what happened in your past.”

  The look on Stephen’s face made his heart thump wildly. For a few seconds, he blinked furiously, the visions of what he’d done floating into the forefront of his mind. He wiped his mouth and bit back a groan. His hand was shaking. “My past? You know? Who told you, I mean Shannon doesn’t know? I haven’t been able to say anything to her. I just have the feeling she’ll finally have the reason to…”

  Stephen waited for a full ten seconds before moving in front of David. “I have no idea about your past. I’m not Houdini, nor do I read minds. What I do know is that there is pain in your eyes, as well as in Shannon’s. We all have pasts. We all have secrets and guilt that run deep, nearly destroying some of us and keeping us from partaking in some of the most beautiful fruit life has to offer. I’m nobody in your life, yet I might be the single catalyst to allow you to talk. But…” Stephen raised his finger, “both you and Shannon have to break through the walls. I’ll simply be here to help you understand what the pieces mean.”

  David nodded and found himself smiling. “I think I did you a disservice. Thank yo
u.”

  “No, you’re a cautious man. If you weren’t, I wouldn’t respect you. Just remember those deep feelings you have for her. Shannon may be a strong woman, but she must have a stronger man. The saddest aspect is, most men have no idea how to be as strong as they need to be. However, I have a very good feeling about you and about your marriage.”

  “Thank you. I…” David inhaled and smiled as she walked closer. “I do too.”

  “Then I’ll see you tomorrow.” Stephen held out his hand. “Just remember you need to be honest. No matter what happens, that’ll make you a better man.”

  David watched as he walked away. A better man. Was that something he could be? Shannon was approaching, a wistful look on her face. As Stephen neared, he stopped and spoke with her for at least two minutes. She nodded several times, touched Stephen’s arm, then continued walking toward him. He shoved his hands in his pockets and waited until she approached.

  “There you are,” Shannon said. She darted a look toward the ocean.

  “What did Stephen say?”

  “Hmm… You notice everything, don’t you?”

  David sighed. “I know what you’re thinking. I’ll give him time. He read me pretty well.”

  “Oh, he did, huh?” Shannon laughed.

  “Why do you say that?”

  “Because he told me he couldn’t get a read on you at all.”

  “No, he did. Maybe too much so.” Her face was pensive, as if so many things were on her mind. “Why don’t we take a walk?”

  “You mean and talk?”

  “Yeah. Our assignment.”

  “Assignment. That sounds so ominous, in truth.” Rubbing her arms and giving him a look before moving closer to the water’s edge.

  David trailed along behind her. His gut told him this was her time to reflect and to talk to him. They both needed to reconnect, and in this sense, space was building trust.

  She stood gazing out at the ocean, her eyes never blinking. Water lapped just to her toes and she was unfazed, merely watching the world.