“Here we are,” she said, pointing to the lone feature in the chamber.
I rose to my knees and studied the large object at the center of the cavern. A gaudy wheel like you’d see on the game show Wheel of Fortune occupied most of the space, except this device of chance stood upright rather than lay flat like Pat Sajak’s moneymaker.
I climbed to my feet and drew closer to the odd assembly. Its frame and pedestal base were red, appearing to be some sort of reflective plastic. A silver pointer radiated from a plump red circle at its center. The face of the wheel was divided into twelve pie slices, all equally-sized. The sections were various shades of red interspersed by three black wedges. The black segments were solid, while the rest had names written in white uppercase on them.
“It’s a wheel,” I said.
“Your mastery of the obvious is impressive,” Yolla said, rolling her eyes and pretending to be unconcerned about my reaction.
A line of six small lights, likely LED judging from their recognizable glow, marked the boundaries between each wedge. Larger bulbs rimmed the perimeter of the whole wheel. I didn’t count, but there were well over twenty of the bigger light fixtures.
The lights were the only thing illuminating the chamber.
Yolla leaned in. “So what can you glean? What are you working out in that marvelous head of yours?” She delivered her questions with sarcasm, but I thought I detected slight admiration as well.
I immediately spotted Yolla’s name demarking one of the bright red slices. “That’s you.”
She smiled but didn’t offer a comment.
On either side of her slice was Xexxer and Zartua. She had mentioned Xexxer already. So I’d been right. Three X’s and not a single Z in attendance.
I spotted Lorfu, the other name she had dropped. In addition, the remaining slices were labeled with the following: Slif, Mnemon, Ed, and Dark Cloud. The last one sounded Native American.
That made eight in all. The final red piece, a reddish-brown one, had a name, but it was pretty much scratched out and I could only decipher what looked like a C and an H at the end, maybe.
“I guess these are people? Really weird names. No offense.”
“None taken.”
I waited, expecting her to elaborate. I noticed the pointer rested on Yolla’s slice. “So, could you maybe explain?”
She grinned. “Sure. This is your god wheel.”
I blinked several times and stiffened. “What?”
She bowed. “I’m Yolla, your goddess of good fortune.” She nodded at the wheel. “I’m influencing your life right now, hence all the good stuff that’s been coming your way.”
I frowned, not liking her claim of ownership to my recent upturn. “What the heck is a god wheel?”
“Everyone has one.” She waved at the cave walls. “It’s tucked away in a pocket dimension nestled just next to your hippocampus.”
“This is in my head?”
Yolla said, “Yes.”
“But why? What’s it do?”
“Every mortal has a god wheel and their own pantheon of unique deities.”
“Wait, a personal pantheon? I don’t understand.”
She glared at me. “If you’d stop interrupting, I could get out a complete enough answer to appease your curious nature, Felix. May I?”
Realizing I could possibly be upsetting a goddess outfitted with divine powers that could include destructive eye beams, judging from how her peepers currently glowed an intense yellow, I opted to dial back my panicked interrogation a tad. “You have the floor.” I bowed slightly and took a step back.
The glow from her eyes dimmed. “As I was saying, all mortals have a god wheel tucked away in their headspace. The wheel contains their deities. It is spun regularly and where it lands, that god or goddess holds influence on their affairs.” She stared expectantly, as if anticipating I was about to cut in.
Truthfully, I almost did.
“Any one divine being only holds sway for a limited time, sometimes scant seconds but never more than a few hours before the wheel is spun again and another deity takes on a shift.”
“What happens if it lands on the same god twice in a row?”
“It can’t. It never does.”
Sensing it was okay to ask questions, I said, “So how do I get it to spin? Not that I want to get rid of you.” I issued her a sheepish grin. She had to be powerful, possibly destructive, and I didn’t know what might set her off. I had to tread lightly. “You’re awesome company. Nobody finer I could think of to expound on the inner workings of this cosmic weirdness. Everything’s gangbusters with you.”
“You’re skeptical.”
“Actually, not really. I’m pretty accepting, but this is majorly out there.”
“Be that as it may, it’s the truth.”
“I’m hearing you. So how does it work? Who does the spinning if it’s not me?”
Yolla sighed and offered me a pitying look. “That’s the problem and the whole reason I’ve been given special clearance to interact with you directly. You have to understand that this has never happened before.”
‘What’s never happened before?”
She hesitated but eventually spit it out in a rush. “Your squire is MIA.”
“My squire?”
“The one who helms your god wheel. Your squire does the spinning.”
“And he or she lives here?” I looked around, seeking to spot a small bed, cot, or even nest; for all I knew a squire could be something other than human. There was nothing except for the gaudy wheel.
“They never leave their station. They’re always on duty.”
“Except for right now, with my god wheel.” I felt a little twitchy, anxious that I’d suddenly be yanked out of this place and dropped back into my living room. Not all that undesirable. At least then, I’d be back in a normal locale and no longer contemplating such mind-blowing circumstances.
“Yes, this is a new wrinkle. The powers that be are concerned.”
“Aren’t you the powers that be? I mean, you’re gods, right?”
“We serve as your pantheon. There are those higher up the cosmic food chain who hold sway over us.”
“Sounds a little crowded. Everyone gets eight deities to help them with their life and then there’re even more gods beyond that? How does that work? I mean, I know you say they spin the wheels and all, but what does that do?”
“When summoned by the wheel, the deity on watch has influence. Their specialty permeates their host’s actions and events.”
“So you’re my goddess of good fortune. You’re there when good stuff happens to me?”
“Yes.”
“So my success with Lorna, the winning scratcher, even my dad suddenly opening up, all those positives are because of you?” I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. If this were true, what free will did I have?
“Yes, and I’ve overstayed. You have too much good fortune coming your way. You even see that, right?”
I nodded slowly. “So why drag me into this? Can’t you just get another squire to run my wheel? Why did you have to show me what’s behind the curtain?”
She looked mildly confused. “There is no curtain. I . . .” She smiled. “Ah, I see. Wizard of Oz analogy there.”
“How did you get that reference?”
“All of us are well versed in the experiences of our host. We know all about you and what makes you tick.”
I cringed. “That’s not invasive at all.”
She pointed at me and offered a knowing nod. “You can’t get your subtle brand of sarcasm by me. I’m an expert on all things Felix Martin.”
I shook my head and looked away. “Um, maybe stop reminding me of that. I know you just want to be reassuring, but it’s off-putting. No one wants to know they have a team of gods and goddesses shrunk down and lurking in their heads cataloging their every waking moments.”
“And unwaking periods as well,” she offered, her voice trailing off with each successive
word as she realized she was overstepping yet again. “And we’re not tiny. This chamber resides in a pocket dimension hippocampus adjacent.”
I rubbed at my temples. My head hurt. I looked around. But I was in my skull right now. How did that work exactly? “So what do you want me to do?”
She pointed at the wheel. “Well, spin away.”
“But then you disappear.”
“And another will take my place.”
“You’ve been pretty upfront with me—what if your coworkers aren’t so forthcoming?”
“Well, it’s really not good to overstay. There are ramifications.”
“Like what?”
“You have to understand that this is unprecedented, that this is all conjecture. No one knows exactly what will happen, but we all agree it’s not good.”
“Like reality unraveling, worlds collapsing in on each other bad?”
“Yes, that.” She looked down at the stone floor and casually tracked her foot, tracing slow circles counterclockwise onto the ground. “And more. There’s a prophecy.”
“Of course there is. What’s it say? If a squire be lost to anyone, then the big bad googly-moogly prince of everything evil and nasty appears?”
“The Entropy Queen returns.” She went pale. “No one wants that. Please spin the wheel and let the next deity shepherd you through your mission.”
“And what would that be?”
She hugged herself and shivered. “Surely you feel the looming dread bearing down on us.”
“How could it? You’re here. You’re supposed to bring me good luck or whatever, right?”
“Yes, but this is bigger than that. You may keep having more and more wins, but somewhere out there, the anchors that pin reality in place and keep it safe become unmoored, allowing the Entropy Queen to escape from her confinement and giving her a way back.”
I hated to admit it, but I did feel uncomfortable. It was a creeping sensation that something wasn’t right, like the very air was about to sour.
Yolla looked smaller, frightened.
I put my hand on the wheel. Even its lights were not as bright as before. Something felt off, like reality wasn’t quite right. I didn’t know if that was because Yolla had overstayed her welcome or because of my missing squire or both, but there was a whiff of oppression, dimensionally speaking.
“Spin, Felix, please.”
“Will I see you again?”
“Of course I’ll be back. You just need another here with you now.”
The walls of the chamber seemed to blur, and I heard a rising keening coming from everywhere and nowhere all at once. I half expected a tear in time and space to appear and whatever an Entropy Queen was to claw her way through.
I heaved the wheel downward, and it spun freely, its internal mechanisms whirring slightly.
It flew round and round at least eight times before slowing to a stop, the pointer angled toward Slif, whoever that was.
Yolla smiled and faded into nothingness. She mouthed a thank you.
The lights all over the god wheel blinked and intensified.
There was a blinding flash, and the deity called Slif stood in front of me, her gaze drifting and bobbing about as if she were disoriented. She focused on me and smirked. “There you are. Sis did a really poor job of getting you up to speed, didn’t she?”
I said nothing.
She flung out her right arm and held a knife over her forearm. “Let’s get out of here. Been dying to immerse myself in the real world for decades. Hate this confined prison.” She slashed an inch-long vertical gash into her skin. Blood flew upward and pooled in the air, defying gravity. Her vital fluid swept itself about, forming a circular frame with a diameter twice as wide as my arm span that hovered just feet from the ground. The empty space inside the frame filled with roiling swathes of orange and yellow energy. When all of it turned a rich purple, the goddess sent me an impatient look.
I took a step back.
“Don’t be such a scaredy cat. So I summon portals with a little more grit and style. It’s not going to hurt you, Felix.” She pointed at its blood-rimmed edges. “Jump. Try not to come in contact with the frame. Bloodstains are quite difficult to get clean.” Slif shoved me forward.
I flopped into the rift, kicking and screaming.
Chapter 4
As the Crows Fly
I landed on an expanse of white gravel. I stood, brushing off the small stones that stuck to my forearms and pants. I ignored the slight gravel impressions peppering my skin. I winced at the fresh scrape on my left elbow as I got the lay of the land.
I was standing on an ordinary flat rooftop about as big as a basketball court. I took two steps toward the small roof access building that looked like a brick outhouse with a tin roof that sloped away from me. I faced a steel door painted green and outfitted with a shiny kick plate along the bottom that had seen some abuse. I imagined a tenant or two locking themselves out and kicking like crazy against the door’s lower half until someone came to their rescue. Would I have to do the same?
The surrounding buildings were all shorter. I scanned farther afield, noting the density of the numerous low-slung structures and the lack of skyscrapers. It was either a large town or a small city. I didn’t recognize any landmarks. I drew in a calming breath, put at ease by the normalcy of my setting.
Several crows flew by, opting to perch on a ledge of a dignified brownstone two buildings away.
I dashed over to the edge and examined my building’s façade. It wasn’t the best angle, but I could at least tell I was four stories up. An unseen bell jingled below, and a young couple stepped into view from the first floor, sharing a bowl of ice cream as they walked down the sidewalk. A mother carrying her young daughter headed toward the unseen entrance, the little girl pointing at the couple and both growing more excited to partake of something sweet, judging from their wide grins.The little girl, no more than four, licked her lips and clapped her hands together. The unseen bell jingled again as they pushed open the door and went inside and out of view. A sandwich sign at the edge of the sidewalk declared the business was named Scoops and promised a creamery experience like no other.
The rift emitted a low grumble that rose and fell almost like the unsettled warbling slosh of a queasy stomach.
Slif exited the portal, landing smoothly on her feet. She spun about and gestured at the gateway, gathering her fingers to a shared point as if drawing together invisible cobwebs from the air. The blood forming the rift disassembled and dashed toward her, funneling into her fingertips. Color returned to her cheeks. I hadn’t realized how pale she’d gotten until now. The arrival of a blood-spawned portal tended to overshadow observations of complexion changes, after all.
I familiarized myself with my newest divine tagalong. She was a decade older than her sister. I wondered if Slif had called Yolla ‘sis’ out of a common bond of being goddesses or they were indeed family. Blond curls crept out from under a blue cap that was topped with a silver bell. While the hat reminded me of something donned by a toy-building elf, I didn’t think Slif would appreciate that observation. A simple long-sleeve white blouse covered her torso, while her tan pants were tucked into a pair of low-heeled, brown boots. A red cape ending just above her knees, edged with a yellow trim, gave her a regal appearance. It helped that it billowed rather majestically in the breeze. She wiped clean the knife she’d used to draw her own blood on her cape. The blood seemed to discolor the fabric for a second before magically fading. Try as I might, I couldn’t spot it on the material. She sheathed her blade in a dark brown leather scabbard strapped to her right leg.
She noticed my fixation on her cape, specifically the fact that I kept my gaze locked on where she’d wiped her blood. “Don’t worry. It’s sanitary. Cape’s magic.”
“I saw.” I shook my head. I shouldn’t get so lost in the details.
I took a step toward Slif and slipped on the gravel. I fell backward, bounced off the raised ledge, flailed, twisted, badl
y scraped my ribs, and staggered to safety.
“My fault. Get used to little brushes with misfortune. Hopefully nothing too nasty will befall you.” Slif smiled.
She took my plummeting from a tall building far too lightly. A stubbed toe? That was inconsequential. Anything that could render me a pancake was serious.
On guard, I walked over to the goddess without further mishap. “So I can expect to be clumsy with you here?”
“A lot.” She pointed a thumb at her chest. “The broken bone you got when you slid into home back in the day . . . that was me.”
I’d been thirteen at the time. It was a horrible end to what had been a great season. We had still won the All-Star game, but I’d had to watch from the bench for the last two innings and live with the fact that Tinker Reynolds had taken my spot at second base and delivered a double play to end the game.
Slif continued, “A good deal of your high school years . . . also me, especially how badly your courtship of Allison Summers backfired.”
I frowned. “Then maybe I should get back to the god wheel and spin for somebody a little less incapacitating than you.”
She pretended to be hit in the stomach by invisible arrows. “You wound me. I’m always by your side when life gets really intense. Expect to see a lot of me when things go south with this endeavor.” She looked around as if danger were about to rain down from above.
The clear blue sky and sparse arrangement of pleasant cumulus clouds said otherwise.
Although, five more crows now perched alongside their feathered brethren two buildings away. All eight stared at me. It was rather unnerving. Slif had her back to the crows. Should I point out their odd behavior?
The goddess ended her aerial scan for spontaneous disaster and stared at me.
“What exactly is this endeavor? I mean, I know I have a missing squire and that somehow means some baddie might or might not come back.”
“Oh, she’s definitely coming back. The prophecy says so.”
“Yes, your sister mentioned that. Are you and Yolla actual family?”
“We are, but the rest of your pantheon is not related by blood.”
The God Wheel Page 3
