Leo Kastellanos was one of a kind. He deserved so much more than I could give him right now. And knowing that, was what prompted me to keep my hands to myself. When I pulled my hand back, I was hoping that he hadn’t caught it. Something told me that he did, though.
Only when we got to the elevator did I realize that our outfits kind of matched. Both in jeans, and army green—mine a jacket, and his, a shirt. He wore a black ankle boot, and so did I. It was not deliberate.
When the bell dinged, Leo’s hand landed on the small of my waist, as he ushered me into the elevator. The chill of his touch was immediate, as tingles shot straight up my back and pinged at the base of my neck.
“This place look familiar to you at all?” he casually asked.
I prayed that my voice wouldn’t crack when I replied. “I vaguely remember coming here with a really handsome, insanely successful, and amazingly thoughtful guy.”
“He musta been some kind of dude to evoke a smile like that.”
“He was definitely some kind’a dude.”
As we fell in line with our hostess, Leo’s hand fell from around me. Slight disappointment struck me when the connection was suddenly broken.
Make up your mind, Nova!
You either want the connection or you don’t.
You can’t have it both ways…
If I was conflicted, then surely, I was sending Leo mixed messages. Should I have even come out with him? Should I have even let him come in, when I had already decided that I needed to attend to my issue at hand? What was I doing there?
Damnit, Nova!
And then we reached our seats and all I could think about was how stunning the view was. There wasn’t a place over the valley that couldn’t be seen. I was sure if I looked hard enough, I could probably see my house and Leo’s in the distance.
“So pretty,” I mumbled under my breath, unable to take my eyes away.
“How you feeling?” he asked.
“I’m good. How could I not be?” I looked away from the view outside the window, my eyes landing on him. “I’m in the best company ever. With the most genuine guy ever.”
“I could say the same about you. And I don’t want to hear any disputes about that.”
I couldn’t help but laugh out. Putting my hands up in mock surrender, I said, “You got it, Chief.”
“Chief… I like that.”
“Of course, you do. Such a man.”
And all-man at that…
“How about we order some drinks,” he suggested.
“Great idea. I’m getting what I was eyeing that night.”
“What’s that?” he asked, looking down at his menu.
“You’re looking at that menu like you don’t already know what’s on it. Like you haven’t been here a thousand times,” I threw out, watching him carefully.
He lifted his head and smiled. “Actually, it’s been four—two of those with you. Was there a different question you wanted to ask me? Like who I brought? Is that what you really wanted to ask?”
Yes, that’s exactly what I want to know…
“Umm… no,” I lied.
“Okay. If you say so, Nova.” He placed his menu to the side and then announced, “I’m doing the VSOP. And you?”
“Mimosa with Prosecco.”
When it was all said and done, we had our drinks, a pizzetta, beef sliders, and two rivea salads on the table. Just like the first time, music played in the background. This time there wasn’t a DJ, though. Instead the sounds streamed through a system, but still nice. And like any of the other times that we talked, the conversation was good and had a steady flow.
“How are you feeling now?” Leo asked, doing another check-in after some time had passed.
I reached across the table. This time I lay my hand over his, no longer tripping off of whether or not I made physical contact. “Still good. Definitely needed this.”
“Okay. Just wanna make sure.”
“I really appreciate how sensitive you are to my needs. I wish I’d met you a long time ago. I honestly think that my life would be…”
“Your life could still be. That shit that happened… it happened for you, not to you. It can’t have happened to you, because you came out better for it. They’re gone and in their place is a brand-new start. That rebirth you talked about at your house earlier.”
“Well alright now, Pastor K. You brought a blessin’ with that lesson.”
“You’re funny,” he blushed.
“What? That right there was a word, sir.” Now, on my third mimosa, I felt extra relaxed. “So, what would you charge me for therapy sessions?”
“Ha! She continues with the funnies. I couldn’t counsel myself out of a paper bag.”
“False. It’s like you can appeal to the hostile place in me. Like you’re some kind of crisis negotiator, with the ability to talk me out of my own way.”
“Okay, well in that case, there’s no charge. I’m happy to do that for free.”
I stared at him in admiration, taking him all in. The dark features, that taut jawline that was neighbor to those lips—the lips that brought to mind how wonderful it was having his mouth explore my body. The deep-set eyes, the broad shoulders… all of him. And before I could manage to creep him out, I asked, “Tell me about your relationships, Leo.”
“What do you wanna know?”
I slid my glass to the side and gave him my full attention. “Tell me about the kind of woman that catches your eye. Or what kind has in the past, and where she… they are right now. I’m guessing that they’ve been a shade of brown.”
Leo started laughing, and it was the second time I’d seen him blush. “A shade of brown, huh?”
“Weren’t they?”
“I guess you could say that.” He shrugged his broad shoulders then let them fall. “I like what I like.”
“And how’d they expire?”
“There weren’t a whole lot of ‘they’s’. There were two that I was serious with… a few years apart. The rest… just—”
“Sex?” I asked boldly.
“For lack of a better word,” he offered. “As far as how they expired. Well, the one that I was the closest to, patience just wasn’t her thing.”
“You said closest to. Were you married?”
“Almost…”
I felt an involuntary, and very surprising pang of jealousy. “Really? What happened? I mean, why didn’t the wedding happen?”
“She wanted the athlete. It was all about a lifestyle for her. I was early in my career in construction, and she saw that as a seasonal job with not much upward mobility. Along comes a friend of hers from work who’s connected in sports. Before long, she’s flying out to games with her girls.”
“Oh my God,” I scoffed. Leo’s story sounded familiar—the chick and the athlete. There had been many times where I was approached by some big-time athlete who came in to purchase a car. They were all the same, thinking you were going to salivate the moment they showed interest. My head shook slowly as I processed. I couldn’t wrap my mind around a woman doing that to the man sitting in front of me “I’m so sorry that happened to you, Leo. That’s horrible.”
“Shit. Horrible was her getting pregnant with another man’s child while we were still living together.”
“Oh, hell no! Ugh. This has to be a Vegas thing. I swear to you I met a guy recently who shared a similar experience. Was the athlete a hockey player?” I asked, having a sense of Déjà vu.
“Basketball.”
“So, this woman had a baby on you and then what? Somewhere being cheated on every time he goes on the road?”
“It didn’t even get that far. He was gone before she made it to the delivery room.”
“Wow! Karma’s a bitch. And now here you are building entire communities and corporations, from coast to coast. Her loss. And maybe one day… my gai—”
Oh shit.
I tried to catch myself, but it was too damn late.
Did I really just say that out loud?
Fuck you, Freud!
That Freudian slip brought my buzz down several notches—instantaneously. I hoped against hope that Leo hadn’t caught on. But the look in his eyes was like, Yeah, I heard it…
44 | Raquel Long
“What’s stopping you from relaxing, baby?”
“I am relaxed…” Raquel purred, softly to her man. “Keep going. She’s so responding to you.”
Justin shook his head, disappointed at the show that Raquel was putting on. He slid his now-flaccid penis from inside of the unwelcomed place between Raquel’s thighs. It was a place that normally swallowed him into a slippery-wet abyss; but that wasn’t what was currently taking place. There was no slippery and for damn sure no wet, and he was tired of trying to force the issue.
“I’m done,” he announced, reaching down to his ankles to pull his pants up. “Way too much work, and I sure as fuck ain’t going to be putting in work all by damn self. Fuck that.”
Raquel slowly redressed herself, knowing that she had messed up. She came to Justin’s office for a freaky drive by, but had now destroyed the mood and disappointed him. That wasn’t what she intended to do.
“Baby, don’t be mad at me.” She padded over to the window where Justin stood looking out over the city, his hands tucked in the pockets of his slacks. She slipped her arms through his and snaked them around him in a firm embrace. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I… I… forgive me. My head is just—”
“Not here,” Justin snapped. “And so why the hell would you come and disrupt my workday for that half-assed shit you just gave?”
“I can’t believe you get so mad over sex, Justin. It’s not that serious. And you know that I’m always down to make it up.”
“Always down to make it up.” Justin spun around, causing her arms to fall from his waist. “Do you hear yourself? Why would you have to make anything up? It’s become a pattern, Raquel. I’m tired of it.”
“Wow. So, is sex… all we have?”
“Nah, you don’t get to do that shit. And you pull that card every time. You should be trying to figure out what your blockages are. Because the shit is not natural.”
“You mean being overwhelmed by a case? That’s not natural? Says the person who’s a top corporate attorney!” she remarked angrily. “You’re in the same line of work! How could you not understand?!”
“Stop yelling, Raquel,” he scolded. “You come to my goddamn office like you’re ready to fuck and then can’t perform and want me to hold back. Not gonna happen.” He seethed, through clenched teeth, mere inches from her face. “If you’re so fucked-up behind a case, then you should be somewhere assessing the paperwork and following trails. Not coming to my office to be a cock tease. And let me guess. It’s the one with the murdering cheater, right? The one that has an open and shut fucking case, right? The one whose wife you just had to approach when we were on a date night, right? I wish you fought as hard for what we have.”
“That’s not fair, Justin,” she whined, sadness in her eyes.
“What’s not fair is you being in a relationship for two years that you checked out of eighteen months ago. That’s what’s not fair.”
“Justin, baby. Don’t say that. It’s not true. I love you… us. It’s just that I know he’s not guilty. I know that—”
“Hold the fuck up. So, there’s proof of an ongoing affair,” he said, holding up a finger to begin the countdown of condemning points. “He texted this woman to tell her that he was on his way, the night she was murdered. His phone pinged off of the tower that puts him at her apartment. His sperm is inside of her. His DNA tested positive for paternity. And there’s the murder weapon. What’s left, Raquel? Huh! What’s left? You go ahead and ruin your career and your relationship chasing fuckin’ waterfalls if you want to. But I’m done.”
“Justin…” she said, reaching out to grab his hand into hers.
“I’m done…” he repeated with finality, snatching away from her grasp. “Does he have something on you?”
She smacked her lips loudly, and threw a hand on her hip. “No!”
“You sure you haven’t fucked him, Raquel?”
“How dare you even ask me that.”
“You’re just a little too invested, if you ask me.”
“Because something isn’t right, Justin. There’s something off about this.”
“Wow. You have a weapon—the murder weapon. Fuck everything else. They have the weapon. And you’re still here pleading the case. Trying to figure out what’s missing. You got this whole ride or die thing down to a science. And then you tried to come down here to use me for some dick so you could distract yourself. That right there… got me all the way stunned. You need to go.”
“Justin, you can’t be serious.”
“I can’t?” he asked, walking to his office door and snatching it open. “I’m dead-ass. Get the fuck out. I have meetings to take.”
Raquel took slow steps toward the door, but stopped short of leaving to look up into her boyfriend’s eyes. “Justin, please. I really am sorry.”
“Yeah, me too.”
“Can we talk later?” she asked. “I-I-I… think you’re right. It’s just me not wanting to lose.” She shrugged her shoulders, close to tears. “I know it’s time to let go… of the case, I mean. It’s done. I just…”
When Raquel faced the fact that Justin had already tuned her out, she turned on her heel defeated. She’d lost a battle she never meant to instigate.
45 | Nova
“Hands-down… the best sleepovers I’ve ever had.”
Even in my half-sleep state, his voice made me smile. Adding to the allure of his voice, was the fact that he had me wrapped tight in his arms like a sacred anniversary gift. His breath was warm enough to cause the small hairs on the back of my neck, to stand. Warm enough to send prickly signals of want, down to my triggered center. My kitten wasn’t just purring, she was starting to slowly weep. Even if I tried to stop it, it wasn’t happening.
Temptation was too close—yet again. I completely lost myself when that happened. That’s how we ended up here—yet again.
A few drinks in, being with Leo became the focal point. Then came a touch of the wrist, and a few innuendos. Everything in my head told me to step back behind the boundaries. But that was so very hard. In the end, when our souls once again connected, I lost the battle. The soul knew what the mind and body needed. Leo made being so easy.
“So, while you’re calling them sleepovers, I’ll just refer to them as me having zero self-control… where you’re concerned. It also marks the second time that I was totally unprepared and now have to take the walk of shame through my front door with the same clothes I left in. Yay, me…”
“Hey, you could stay here and I could go and get you some clothes from your closet, or from the nearest mall. Or call over a stylist. It’s not as hard as you think.”
“Stop.”
“What? Just sayin’. You don’t have to go home in the same clothes. I’m also not having the same debate about Uber. Uber’s out.”
I chuckled at his boss-up. “I won’t argue. I won’t resist. At this point, we’ve done the grown-up a few times now. No need in treating it as some kind of random act—with a random guy. It’ ain’t that.”
“Definitely ain’t that,” he responded.
The sun wasn’t quite screaming through the window yet, which told me that it was somewhere around four or five. Which also meant that I would need to get up soon so that I could get home, showered, and into work.
I turned to face Leo, moving slowly enough not to shake his arm free. I really liked that warm, soft spot. Now, my hair… that was for a whole other situation. It was every damn where. But oddly enough, I wasn’t pressed. As far as I was concerned, it was messed up for a good cause.
“Why are you so sweet?” I asked him, snuggled into his chest, in case my breath wasn’t the freshest.
He smoothed my hair away from my forehead, then leaned down and kissed me softl
y right at tip of my hairline. “Because you deserve it…”
I inhaled a deep breath, then exhaled and boldly pulled back to look up at him. In his eyes, I saw sincerity. I saw strength, comfort… safety.
“I hope you have a baseball cap in that big ol’ closet for this head of mine,” I said, veering in another direction with the conversation. “Because my hair is a hot ass—”
“It’s beautiful,” he complimented, taming a few loose curls with his finger.
“Yeah, okay… sooo do you have a baseball cap? Or at least a very good brush.”
“I got both.”
“What time is it?” I looked around trying to see if there was a clock in the vicinity that I missed.
Leo reached behind him and grabbed his cellphone then reported, “It’s almost 5:30.” He put the phone back down. “What time are you trying to leave?”
“Long as I’m in the shower by eight, I’m good. If it’s not asking too much, can we drive-thru Starbucks before you drop me off?”
“We can definitely do that. And since you don’t really live that far away, and Starbucks is right near here. We have a few minutes to—”
“Nuh-uh,” I objected, smiling. “Nooo, Leo. It would never be just a few min—”
But out of nowhere, I was silenced.
Somewhere between a yes, to Starbucks, and an attempted no, to sex, Leo’s hand had fallen from around my waist and landed on my stiff, throbbing nub. When his fingers found their way inside of me, I rocked against the rhythm of his stroke.
And to think, I was trying to protest. Ohhh, but it was too much to pass on.
I rolled over on my back and spread my legs wider to give him even more access. My arms fell limp at my side, as his mouth descended on mine and we kissed like we had never kissed before. It was the perfect way to start a brand-new day.
I now knew how I would handle my situation…
46 | Nova
“Hey! Who’s this beauty in the sexy red dress, and with a glow?”
I waved animatedly, as I got closer to where Kali stood in a hot-pink dress, cute white pumps, and new pixie cut.
Lethal Love: Deceit can be Deadly Page 20
