by Hope Ford
I just stood there.
I can’t believe it.
I make sure to eat all of the burrito, even though I have to force myself to do it. It’s still really good, but I seem to have lost my appetite.
I try to catch her to pay, but she’s been in the back since she brought out my food.
“Where’s Carrie?” I ask Patty.
“She’s working on another recipe in the back,” she tells me, but I can tell by the worried look on her face that she’s upset with what happened earlier. I don’t remember seeing her here at the time, but obviously she’s heard about it.
“Okay. Well, will you tell her thanks for the burrito. It was really good.”
“Sure thing, Sheriff,” she says.
I walk out of the bakery wondering if this day can get any worse.
10
Carrie
“Two dozen assorted donuts, please,” Lacy says.
I start packing her order. “You have a lot of guests?”
“Yes. And I don’t want to do breakfast in the morning. I’m going to pair this with some oatmeal and fruit and call it a day.”
“Sounds perfect to me,” I tell her. I know Lacy has been super busy since she took over the bed and breakfast for her parents.
We’re silent while I finish boxing up her goodies, and she looks at me with a small tilt to her head. “What’s wrong?”
I should have known that she would figure something was wrong. In high school we were pretty close. Plus, she knows my mother, so I know I can talk to her about it, and she’s going to understand.
“My mom…” I start.
“What did she do now?” she asks with a roll of her eyes. Automatically, Lacy’s hand goes to her hip, and her shoulders straighten in defense. She’s been there for many of the arguments my mom and I have had over the years. I hate being vulnerable, but I know I need to talk to someone about it.
“Well, let’s see. She decided to come in today and announce to anyone within hearing range that I had dropped out of school and that I’m fat.”
Lacy gasps and I continue, “Yep, that about sums it up.”
“Carrie, no! You had to be mortified. I’m so sorry. And she’s wrong, you know.”
“Don’t! Just don’t!” I tell her, holding up my hand to stop her. I know what she’s going to say. As my friend, she feels the need to tell me that I’m not fat, and she thinks I’m pretty, but I don’t want to hear it today. “I know I’m big. But I also know my mom shouldn’t be talking about me the way she was. It’s over, though. I just let it get to me is all.”
Lacy seems to think about it. “You know what we need? A girls’ night out. Me, you, Chrissy, and I heard Rose was back in town. Let’s all go out to the Roadside Diner and Bar tonight.”
“No, that’s okay. I’m not going to be much company. I know that. There’s no sense ruining everyone else’s night.”
She pulls out her phone and starts typing away.
“What are you doing?” I ask her.
“Planning tonight.”
I start to argue, but her phone dings. “Chrissy is in. She can get a babysitter for Katie.”
“I haven’t seen Chrissy in forever,” I say, mentioning an old friend from high school. She was a year older than me and two years older than Lacy, but we all still had some classes together. She got married right out of high school and opened the gym beside Patty’s.
“Yep, that’s what she just said.” She holds the phone up and Chrissy’s text reads, I haven’t seen Carrie in forever. Can’t wait! with a bunch of emojis.
“I guess I’m in,” I tell her.
She looks at me like she never doubted it. “Great! I’ll pick you up tonight at seven.”
We settle the bill, and it isn’t long before I start closing the bakery.
I go home first and use the back entrance so I can avoid seeing or speaking to my mother. I get some relief when my dad says that Mom is meeting with her quilting group. Great, some more people for her to tell that I dropped out of college and am fat, I think bitterly. No doubt they are all caught up on the latest events in my life and all the ways I’m disappointing too.
I shower and get dressed up for the night out with my friends. I take the extra time to curl my hair and put makeup on. I’m even wearing a dress.
Lacy texts me, and I come down the stairs. “Dad, I’m going out with friends.”
“You look beautiful, honey. Be safe. Call if you need anything.”
I hug my dad and kiss him on the cheek. He’s always so kind. He means well, but I know he’s biased when it comes to me.
Scott
I’m kicking myself for not at least getting her phone number. I’m at home and should be sleeping off such a long shift, but I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. All I want to do is see Carrie or at least talk to her. I know she was hurt today, and I just need to know she’s okay. I’m still amazed by the way her mother talked about her. Does she not know how beautiful Carrie is? I feel like I can barely catch my breath when I’m around her she’s so pretty. And so what if she dropped out of school? Obviously, baking makes her happy, and she’s really good at it. Even though I don’t like sweets normally, I’ve tried her quiche and even one of her oatmeal cookies and they were the best I’ve ever had.
I could be calling her and asking her out if I’d been thinking before and asked her for her number. How could I not have asked her for her number?
My phone rings, and the caller ID tells me it’s one of my lieutenants. “Yeah,” I say hurriedly into the phone. Mack doesn’t usually call unless there’s something wrong or if I’m needed for something.
“Sheriff?”
I blow out a breath impatiently. “Yeah, Mack. It’s me.”
There’s a bunch of noise in the background, and I can barely understand him. “Hey, I just thought you’d want to know. Carrie from the bakery is at the Roadside.”
I hold my hand over my left ear and press the phone closer to my right. “What? Carrie’s on the side of the road?” I ask, alarmed.
“No. She’s at the Roadside Diner… dancing.” He waits a second and tries again. “She’s at the bar.”
Carrie’s at the bar? My first thought she’s on a date and I should leave her alone, but in the same instant I know there’s no way I’m going to miss this chance of seeing her out in public. Her away from her job and me away from mine. “Thanks, Mack,” I tell him before quickly grabbing my keys and heading out the door. Things are looking up.
Now I just have to figure out what I am going to do if she is there on a date.
11
Carrie
I’m determined to erase the embarrassment my mom caused in the bakery with some strong drinks. The girls are great to catch up with, and they’ve kept me laughing.
“Where’s Rose? I thought you invited her,” I ask Lacy.
“She’s home with her parents, but nothing I could say would convince her to come out tonight.”
I look at her worriedly. Rose just graduated college, and she’s been following her husband around to ball games. He’s a professional baseball player. “Is everything okay?” I ask.
Lacy nods her head, but I can tell she’s worried too. “Drink up, Carrie. We’re about to go dance some more.”
It’s so great being with good friends that will let you have a good time, but also not let you drink so much and make a full out of yourself.
I’m enjoying a nice buzz when I recognize Scott sitting at the bar. He’s looking right at me, and it gives me a jolt of warmth that spreads through my body. I try to convince myself it’s the alcohol, but I’m not stupid. I get the same feeling every other time I’ve seen Scott. I think I blamed it on the ovens then.
Seeing him reminds me of the embarrassment my mom caused earlier, and I go to order another drink. But I don’t have to go far. The waitress sets down a tray at our table. “These are from the guys at the bar,” she says with a nod of her head towards the three men that have been hooting and wh
istling at us since we came in.
I know I’m benefitting from sitting with my beautiful friends, but I need a drink, so I accept the drinks on behalf of the table. Holding the drink up, I tilt my glass to the guys as a thanks before I drink the shot in one gulp. I’m not sure what it is, but I’m hoping it’s enough to keep me from letting my night out be ruined with more bad memories thanks to my mom.
Chrissy and Lacy both laugh. “You’re so bad,” Lacy says. “They are going to think they have a chance with one of us now.”
“Not me. I’m over men,” Chrissy says. She’s recently divorced from her husband, and from what I understand it didn’t end well.
“C’mon, Chrissy. They’re not all bad. Trent’s brothers are both single. Of course, Jason just left for the army, but Derrick is available. How about it?”
“Thanks, but no thanks,” she says while scrunching up her nose.
Lacy turns to me, and I’m already backing away. “Not me. I’m good,” I tell her. Honestly, I remember Derrick, and he’s a good guy. But dating doesn’t really interest me. Unless of course it’s with the sheriff.
But just thinking about him causes me to be embarrassed again. “Let’s dance,” I tell them and lead the way to the dance floor.
Scott
At first, I was pleased to see Carrie happy and having a good time. I was trying to think of something to say when I approach her, but then Carrie saw me and didn’t wave. I’m unsure if she wants to see me or not, so I park myself at the bar and sip on a beer.
When the guys down from me send over a round of drinks, talking about how they’re going to nail Carrie and her friends, I get up and walk over to them. I make sure to show them my badge that’s clipped onto my belt. “It would probably be in your best interest to get the hell out of town before I impound your car.”
I don’t know which car is theirs, but I do know that I’m not going to sit there and listen to them disrespect Carrie. She’s had enough of that today, and I won’t stand by again. For anybody.
They all three stand, and for an instant I think they’re going to do something stupid. In the end, they make the right decision. They get up, and with only a shove into my shoulder they walk out the door.
My eyes go to the table where Carrie was sitting, but now she’s out on the dance floor. She’s dancing with a guy that works at the garage. I used to like him; he always does good work when I have to take my car in to be tuned up. But right now, I hate him. He’s obviously taking advantage of Carrie being drunk and holding her too intimately.
I should leave it alone. Maybe she wants to dance with him. I grip on to the back of the chair next to me and start counting backwards from ten. I act as if that’s going to calm me, but it doesn’t. Watching her in the arms of another man is going all through me, and I don’t know how I’m still standing here. It’s pure torture. I want nothing more than to go over and throw her over my shoulder, take her home, and show her that I’m the man she needs. She brings something territorial out in me, and I’m fighting with myself on what to do. I could cause a scene and stake my claim. But she deserves better than that. She deserves to be romanced and to be shown how a man should treat a woman.
I don’t blink, I don’t breathe. I just stand here and watch. I want to look away, but I can’t let myself. The torture is real, and it feels like it’s tearing my heart out of my chest.
When the man’s hands slide down her waist and touch her ass, I’m done. I can’t stand still another minute. I storm across the room, reminding myself the whole way that I’m the sheriff and I can’t be involved in a bar fight. But even knowing that, I know that nothing is going to stop me from getting Carrie in my arms.
12
Carrie
Is he squeezing my butt, or is my butt falling asleep?
“I’m cutting in,” a man says with the kind of authority that sends my dance partner on his way. I just decided I am gonna stick with coffee from now on as my new dance partner takes my hand in his and slides his other one down my back, stopping on my lower back.
The squeezing sensation on my butt is gone, so I’m sure now that my last dance partner was getting extra friendly.
“I hope you don’t mind me cutting in. I just couldn’t resist.” The strong voice comes again.
I raise my gaze from the man’s chest and smile when I recognize Scott. I nod my head at him, but don’t mutter a word. I’m dancing with Scott.
Something about the way he’s looking at me sobers me up much faster than coffee would have. “You like to dance?” I ask him after we dance for a few minutes. It’s taken me that long to find my voice.
“I’m not very good, am I?” He laughs. “Sorry, I just thought if I didn’t get out here and dance with you, I’d lose my chance to tell you how beautiful you look tonight.”
Maybe some more alcohol would be a good idea.
“Thank you,” I almost whisper to him shyly. I’m sure he’s trying to make me feel better after what he overheard today, but I still can’t help but swoon a little at his compliment.
This must be what it’s like to be beautiful and thin. Might as well enjoy it.
We keep dancing, and when the song changes, it picks up pace.
Scott was being way too modest. He’s not only a good dancer, but he’s a great leader too. He’s even making me look like I know what I’m doing. I can’t stop smiling. He makes me feel as light as a feather and beautiful, too.
Scott
Dancing with her is the perfect excuse to hold her in my arms, and I’m bummed when Carrie’s friends wave her back to the table.
“Do you want to meet my friends?” she asks with her hand out to me.
I don’t even have to think about it. I put my hand in hers and lace our fingers together and let her pull me toward her them. I have no doubt that I would follow her anywhere she wants to go.
Carrie introduces me, and I’m familiar with who they are, mostly because I like to know who lives in town.
“You know, Sheriff, you’re lucky to be dancing with Carrie,” her friend Lacy tells me.
Carrie rolls her eyes and tries to pull her hand away, but I hold it tighter. “Oh, I know how lucky I am. That’s for sure,” I reply without taking my eyes off Carrie.
Her cheeks are flushed, and eyes are a little glassy. I don’t know if it’s the alcohol or a reaction to my words, but I know what I’m saying is the truth. And I’m glad that Carrie has good friends. After being exposed to her toxic mother, I know she can use them.
“So we are about to head out. My babysitter will need to go home soon,” Chrissy says.
“Yeah, and Trent has texted me around twenty times wondering when I was going to be home.”
Carrie nods her head. “Yeah, sure. I’m ready when you are.”
But I still don’t let go of her hand. “I can take you home.”
“Are you sure you don’t mind?”
“Mind? No, I want to,” I assure her honestly.
Lacy reaches in to hug Carrie, and I can hear her asking her if it’s okay or not. I can feel myself holding my breath waiting for her answer. As they’re pulling apart, I hear Carrie say, “Yes, I’ll be fine with Scott. We’re friends.”
Friends, I think. I want to be more than her friend. But I’m willing to be patient.
“Besides, I just found a great dance partner. Did you see us out there?” she asks her friends.
Her friends hoot and cheer for us as I twirl her back onto the dance floor.
We spend thirty minutes on the dance floor, and she teaches me a line dance she’s learned. I don’t even care that it’s probably going to get back to my deputies that I’m out here dancing. I’m having too good of time to stop.
When we finally take a break, we fall into that easy flow of conversation like we have in the mornings at the bakery.
“So tell me about you,” I say to her over the music.
I pull the edge of her seat so she’s sitting closer to me. I do it with the pretense that I
can hear her, but really I just want her close to me.
She flushes, and I know she’s thinking about her mother earlier today. “Tell me about the bakery. How did you learn how to make everything you make? And don’t tell Patty, because I’ll deny I ever said it, but there’s been an obvious improvement since you moved into town and started working there.”
She softens toward me and leans even closer. “Thank you, Scott. That’s so nice of you to say. I love to bake and cook. It’s just something I’ve always enjoyed doing. My mom thinks it’s a waste, and I’m sure other women think I’m setting us back like fifty years, but I enjoy feeding people. I like seeing how much they enjoy it, and I love how it brings people together. It’s more than just baking and cooking to me.”
Her voice gets emotional as she talks about her passion, and I fall a little deeper for her. How can her mother not see what an amazing woman she is?
I pat my stomach. “Well, you’ve definitely won me over. I’m going to be a lifelong customer.”
Her eyes flash up to mine as if just realizing what I said. But I don’t panic or try to take back the words. I mean them and don’t want her to see any doubt in my face as I stare back at her.
I reach for her hand and hold it under the table, resting it on my knee. She seems like she’s sobered up a lot, but I can still tell she’s tipsy. I’m a little disappointed because I want so badly to kiss her, but I won’t take advantage of her. More than that, I’m not going to ruin my chances with her if she were to remember the kiss tomorrow and not be into it. Then things would get awkward, and my chances would be blown altogether.
13
