Gift-Wrapped & Toe-Tagged: A Melee of Misc. Holiday Anthology

Read Gift-Wrapped & Toe-Tagged: A Melee of Misc. Holiday Anthology Storyline:

Product DescriptionLonger than the New Testament .... More dick than Charles Dickens .... And so many Evil Santa's that you can't keep them at bay shaking a candy-cane dildo sword at them!From the icy bowels of the world-famous MELEE OF MISCELLANY comes the last Christmas anthology you'll ever need ...________________________________________If you only illegally download one fucked-up and festive custom-made Christmas anthology packed with pilfered and plundered tales of the merry macabre this holiday season, make it this one!Featuring over 140-odd yuletide yarns, Gift-Wrapped & Toe-Tagged provides unending hours of holiday horror and humor guaranteed to inspire warm and fuzzy feelings of panic, nausea and apathy during the time of year that you need them most!Whether you love Christmas or hate it, you can be sure to offset any unnatural yearnings of peace on earth or counterproductive leanings of good will toward men with dropped yule logs from:Joe R. Lansdale, Donald E. Westlake, Patrick Kill, Cullen Bunn, Spike Milligan, William S. Burroughs, Neil Gaiman, Robert Bloch, James A. Moore, Richard Brautigan, Bradley Sands, R. Chetwynd-Hayes, Jeff Strand, David Whitman, Ramsey Campbell, Barry Gifford, Al Sarrantonio, Lotus Rose, Rod Serling, Dan Keohane, Kealan Patrick Burke, Bentley Little, Aaron Polson, Simon Wood, Steve Martin, Jack Kilborn, Manly Wade Wellman, Charles Bukowski, Jeffrey Thomas, Michael Bishop, Cameron Pierce, Arthur C. Clark, Angela Carter, John Everson, Richard Matheson, Kurt Vonnegut, Bruce Jones & MORE . . .Not to mention non-fiction from Jim Goad, Ray Garton, John Edward Lawson, Paul Auster, Jack Ketchum, Michael Ian Black and Nigel Kneale - as well as contributions from such up-and-coming names as H.P. Lovecraft, Anton Chekhov, J. Sheridan Le Fanu, Arthur Machen, Guy De Maupassant and "anonymous."  Also jammed in the stocking are illustrations by Jackson Publick, Charles Addams, Gahan Wilson, Edward Gorey, Berni Wrightson, Mike Mignola, Tim Burton, Mitch O'Connell and the finest WWII-era propaganda artists google has to offer, all wrapped in a majestic cover painting by Ken Kelly commissioned especially for this edition way back in 1981 ...Don't let the size of this package intimidate you. It may require you and a friend to lift, but if there's one thing even this anthology endorses - it's coming together. The tones are diverse, the genres plentiful, and alll personal boundaries will be crossed ... so hunker down onto Santa's lap, crack open your e-reader and observe a federal holiday ... Melee-style!