Blackout

by Katy Mitchell

  Kaden, who was now the walking, talking, humanoid version of himself again, simply grinned and said, “You’re absolutely right! We are still in Bramblegate! The question is when?” he added knowingly, tapping the side of his nose to indicate he had some inside information.

  Cecily looked around. Everything was exactly the same here as it was from where they had just come. The only way she could tell it was different was because of the fine drizzle that was falling from a greying sky. A minute ago, it had been a glorious June day. And of course, the absence of the Fanes gave it away.

  Along with her children, Lady Bramble now seemed to be in shock also. She stood staring at the floor, mouth opened slightly, clinging tightly to her children.

  “We should really get changed,” said Fen, looking down at her ripped evening gown and lack of shoes. “We are not really dressed for the weather here.”

  Elisabeth, Jedd and Sol muttered in agreement.

  “We’ll go and find some clothes up at Bramble Hall. I’m sure they will have something for us to wear. We’ll take Lady Bramble and the children with us. They could probably do with some familiarity round about now.”

  Fen looked at the family with sad eyes. As they headed off in the direction of Bramble Hall, Cecily could hear Fen comforting Lady Bramble and the children. This was more like the Fen that Cecily knew. She had temporarily dropped her guard; the tough warrior was momentarily gone and her caring side shone through. Cecily thought how Sol must have been glad about this. Cecily noticed that they had seemed uncharacteristically distant from one another since they were reactivated.

  “Come on,” said Kaden, snapping her out of her thoughts. “We’re going this way!”

  “Wait!” replied Cecily, rather urgently. “Where are we going? Will they be ok? What if Dasrus and the shadows attack them at Bramble Hall?”

  “They’ll be fine, Cec,” said Kaden, earnestly. “Honestly, you really don’t have to worry here. We are all safe in this place. Even if Dasrus happens to work out what we’ve done, he has no way of knowing which date in the past we have returned to. It would take him a while to locate us and in any case, I don’t plan on being here too long.”

  Cecily felt comforted by Kaden’s assurances.

  “So where are we going?”

  “Well first of all, down to the dell. We’ll stop there and get changed on our way to the village.”

  “The village? Why are we going there?” questioned Cecily.

  “It’s time for you to get your memory back.”

  Cecily was quiet on the walk down to the dell. In truth, she was nervous about what she may witness in this place and time. She was scared about what she might find out. Her thoughts drifted back to the Bramblegate she had just left and she wondered how people there were coping. Maybe thanks to the Purification Unit it was like nothing had happened. Perhaps they were carrying on with life as normal, minus some villagers, who were savaged by demons. She thought about Bramble Hall and wondered if the Dairy had reopened. Were Joan, Millie and John all right? They had all been at the party. Had Acantha been cured and was she now trotting about Bramble Hall in her navy-blue court shoes like she owned the place? Did anyone even miss Cecily or wonder where she had gone? Would they report her missing? Her experiences over the past few days were too much for Cecily to take. It was so surreal.

  As they neared the dell, Cecily said to Kaden, “What if I don’t want to remember? I just want to be me, no matter how good or bad my life turns out.”

  “Cecily, I promise you that when you get your memory back, your human life with all its worries will seem trivial. You will want to help the cause. It is what you are here for. You will get to be human again soon enough. Once we have sorted Dasrus and his demons out, you will be deactivated again.”

  “Until the next time.”

  “Yes, until the next time, but you won’t remember any of these feelings. This time there has just been a …” Kaden paused while he found the correct word, “… a hitch with your reactivation.”

  If she was born over and over again, just like Kaden had said, then Cecily found it troubling that she could not remember who she had been or what she had done or her feelings. Was she a different person every time she came back? How could she ever truly know herself?

  As they entered the dell, it occurred to Cecily that she did not know who Mr and Mrs Fane really were either and this surprised her as she had spent a lot of time around them growing up, living in such close proximity. She decided to ask Kaden about the elderly couple.

  “Mr and Mrs Fane are what we call Watchers. I have been with them for as long as I can remember. They retain their memory, like I do mine and they watch for pending danger. I suppose they are a bit like spies.”

  Cecily wondered how Dasrus and his demons had managed to infiltrate Bramblegate right under their noses, especially if they were spies on the look out for threats, but she felt this was disrespectful to the Fanes and Kaden, so she said nothing.

  “What were those strange names that you all gave to Mr Fane at his house?”

  “They aren’t strange names, Cec,” explained Kaden. “They are our real names. The names we were given by the Light when we came into being. Kaden is the name my mother in this lifetime gave me. Do you want to know your real name?”

  “Erm, no thanks,” she replied. “Cecily will do just fine.” She felt she was already struggling with her identity without being given a different name too.

  “Suit yourself,” said Kaden.

  “And what were those brands that appeared on their hands?”

  “They are the warrior’s mark. Each brand is unique to a certain sword, just as each sword is unique to the warrior. By showing the brand, they can prove who they are.”

  “But someone could just copy the brand and pretend to be that warrior,” suggested Cecily, attempting to find holes in anything Kaden said.

  “Ok, so what was Fen’s brand? I saw you looking over her shoulder.”

  “Well I couldn’t quite see… I don’t know, I can’t remember!”

  “Exactly!” spewed a triumphant Kaden. “Very strong magic. You forget the brand as soon as you see it. It wouldn’t matter anyway. No one could pretend to be a Cerberean. They would need the sword.”

  “What is the deal with those swords? Where on earth do they come from? Are they invisible?”

  “No, not invisible. The swords are not on this plane. They are in the Realm of Light, only retrievable when the owner calls for it. Again, powerful magic.”

  “But someone could just steal it out of their hands while it is on this plane,” said Cecily, impudently.

  “Impossible!” replied Kaden. “Once a sword has left its owner’s hand for whatever reason, it returns to the Light automatically.”

  “Let me guess? Magic!” said Cecily, sarcastically.

  “You may mock me, Cecily Stalks, but you will see for yourself soon enough.”

  When Cecily found herself outside the cottage, she did a double take to check she was in the right place. It was very different from the home she knew. It was constructed from the same grey stone; however, the two windows at the front were tiny and the door was rounded and made of wood. The roof was thatched, so unlike her childhood home where the roof had red brick tiles and contained a dormer. There was no garden to speak of and it seemed the grassland surrounding the cottage was tended to by a couple of grazing cows. Kaden must have seen the shock on her face, because he tugged on her sleeve and gestured that they should go inside.

  “Shouldn’t we knock first?” asked Cecily as he began to open the door.

  “Don’t worry about it,” said Kaden as he made his way inside.

  Cecily followed him hesitantly and was even more surprised at what she saw inside. The cottage comprised of one room. She could almost sketch out the way the cottage had changed into the home she knew so well in the future. Due to the two tiny windows at the front of the house, the room was very dark. On one side of the room, there was a larg
e open hearth with a cauldron hung above it and a roaring fire. As there was no chimney, the room was thick with smoke. In front of the fire sat a simple wooden table with benches on either side, upon which sat a loaf of bread, a knife, a jug and some wooden bowls. Opposite the fire on the other wall, there were some storage chests. Tools and pottery vessels were hung from hooks on the walls. Rushes covered the floor and in one of the far corners of the room, were what Cecily thought must have been beds, made of straw. Cecily thought how simple it was. The people who lived there must be very poor. There was a layer of soot on everything and underneath the heavy smoky atmosphere lay an insipid smell that Cecily could not identify.

  “Who lives here?” she asked Kaden.

  “It’s not important,” he replied, cryptically.

  Kaden had darted over to the back corner of the room opposite the straw beds and he was now muttering and waving his hands in front of the wall. A block of stone removed itself and hovered in the air while Kaden reached inside the hole and pulled out various packages wrapped in cloth. He was checking the contents of each and when he found two parcels he was happy with, he set the stone to its rightful position with a wave of his hand. Kaden tossed Cecily one of the packages and said, “Here, get changed.”

  “I’m OK in my jeans and jumper, thanks,” said Cecily, holding out the package back towards Kaden.

  “Your clothes are not practical, Cec. Please get changed,” insisted Kaden. He had acquired that tone of voice in which Cecily thought it best not to argue with him.

  She walked over to the table and placed the package upon it. She unwrapped the cloth to see what clothes lay inside. To her horror, she found brown cotton trousers, a pale olive-green long sleeved top, a cropped brown, leather waistcoat with buckles down the front and studs up and down the seams and a matching brown leather belt. A gold arm cuff lay in between the fabrics and leathers for protection. As Cecily was holding up the cuff, trying to examine it in what little light was available, Kaden told her, “That is one of your favourites.”

  “Oh right!” said Cecily. She had to admit, it was beautiful, ornately decorated with golden flowers and precious stones for the petals.

  Cecily quickly got changed and she discovered that the outfit was a good fit. The trousers were fitted, as was the top, although the material was quite thick and heavy and once she had the leather waistcoat on, she felt quite warm. Kaden was still rooting around the cottage. He too had changed into a similar garb of cotton and leather. As he handed Cecily a pair of socks and pair of long, brown leather boots, he looked her up and down and said, “Perfect!” very enthusiastically. “You are looking more like you!” he added with a wink.

  Cecily tutted as she sat on one of the benches to pull the thick socks and long boots on. The boots came over her knee and they too had buckles down one side. The boots then folded over at the top and they were, of course, flat. Practicality first, she thought to herself sarcastically.

  “I feel like an idiot,” she said to Kaden when she was ready. “I would never wear these clothes.”

  “Trust me, you would!” said Kaden, laughing unsympathetically.

  Cecily heaved a big sigh as Kaden said, “Come on, let’s get something to eat before we go back out again. We’ve not eaten in a day or two. You must be starving, I know I am!”

  Kaden began cutting large slices of bread from the loaf which lay on the table.

  “Kaden, should you be doing that?” challenged Cecily. “That is not our bread to take. What if someone misses it?”

  “Cecily, it’s OK,” replied Kaden, as he continued to cut the bread. “We are just observers here in this time and these events, this time, has already passed. Think of it as a live history lesson. We can touch things, feel things and learn things, but we can’t be seen and nor can we change anything. This bread won’t be missed as this day has already gone, already been lived. We are in a physical domain, but everything here is an echo of past events. So please, don’t worry. We can eat the bread.”

  Cecily was not quite sure she understood Kaden’s explanation, but she was starving and so she tucked into the slightly stale bread, being careful to cut the soot-covered crust from it first. She washed the frugal meal down with a few cups of water and thought it was the best meal she’d had in ages.

  “So where are we going and what are we going to see there?” asked Cecily to Kaden, who was still eating.

  Kaden took a drink of water before he answered.

  “There is a war happening at this point in time, just outside the village in the fields and woodland.”

  “A war?” questioned Cecily. “Between whom?”

  “The Light and the Dark, of course,” replied Kaden. “We were a part of that war, Cecily, and we won. I’m hoping that if you can see yourself in action, see your true self, it might trigger reactivation.”

  Cecily said nothing. What more could she say? She could disagree violently and tell Kaden he was lying and yet here she stood, in her own home, hundreds of years earlier. Kaden must have read her mind.

  “I know it’s a lot to take in and probably hard to believe and I know I keep saying it will all become clear when your memory returns, but it really will. You have to have faith, Cec.”

  Cecily walked over to the storage chests and began opening each one of them to have a look inside.

  “How do you do it, Kaden? How do you cope with remembering lifetime after lifetime? Do you not get tired of it?”

  “It’s my job. It’s the way it’s always been. I’m a Light Doer. I keep records of happenings on the Earth plane regarding the domain we protect and I’m here should the Dark attempt to return.”

  “Yes, but is it hard?” questioned Cecily, opening yet another chest.

  “I’ve never known any different as I’ve never been deactivated. When I’m not needed to fight, I try and enjoy life like the rest of you. There are many wonders, Cecily. Life is a gift.”

  “You always seemed more mature then me growing up. You were always right about everything. Now I know why!”

  “As a child, I still have the same active mind, but I’ve become good at playing each role, I feel.”

  “It all makes sense now, how well you handled your mother’s death and the way you handle your stepfather.”

  “It is sometimes difficult for me to engage fully in every day human stresses and their trials and tribulations. I am often able to see the bigger picture because I remember everything. I am able to be less selfish and less self-involved, although I realise I still have a part to play, for example, the loving son who has just lost his mother. My mother in this lifetime had an awful illness and although I tried my best to make her as comfortable as possible, she endured a lot of pain and suffering. When she died, she passed to the Light. That should be celebrated. She was relieved of her pain and suffering. As for my stepfather, he is on his own journey, yet to choose Light or Dark and so I must leave him to it.”

  “Kaden, did my father pass to the Light?” asked Cecily warily, somehow knowing the answer, but still afraid of Kaden’s response.

  “Of course he did, Cec. Your father was a good man.”

  Cecily breathed a sigh of relief.

  Kaden continued. “Human emotions are a powerful thing. It is sometimes hard for the others as they live a true human existence, like you are now; dormant, sleeping until needed. Even though they are now reactivated, their emotions are still very real to them, as reactivation has only just happened. They have to battle them. Fen and Sol are having to try extremely hard as relationships between Cerbereans are forbidden.”

  “Oh wow! Poor Fen and Sol! I thought they had seemed a bit distant from one another. I was also wondering how Fen was coping after all that happened on her birthday, what with the massacre at the party and getting captured. I would have been devastated if that had happened on my birthday.”

  Cecily was genuinely sincere, yet Kaden rolled his eyes.

  “That is what I call a triviality. The birthday is not import
ant, what happened is.”

  Cecily felt embarrassed and looked away sheepishly. She continued to rummage through the storage chests. She knew that Kaden was not trying to make her feel bad. She was still human after all.

  “Jedd has also been experiencing the same battle. As he was not deactivated this time around, he has been wrestling with his emotions the whole time, which is what led him to betray us. Bitterness and anger are dangerous emotions. I feel them too and sometimes I have to check myself when I feel them getting the better of me. You will have to as well. Once we have been reactivated and we are Cerbereans again, it is not our job to feel. We have to see the bigger picture, put others before ourselves and get the job done. Although we look after each other, of course.”

  Cecily had now finished rooting through the storage chests and she returned to where Kaden was sat at the table. She slumped onto one of the benches.

  “I’m just not like all of you, Kaden. I’m not mentally strong enough. None of you seem to feel pain and you never complain. That hike out of the dungeon to the portal was horrendous. And Fen and Elisabeth did it wearing no shoes! I’m just not good enough. I moan about everything!”

  She buried her head in her arms, feeling exhausted and very sorry for herself. Kaden simply chuckled.

  “That is part of their power as Cerbereans, Cec! Do you honestly think Fen and Elisabeth would have been able to do that without shoes had they not been reactivated? As warriors, they are strong both physically and mentally. They possess endurance and agility, courage and determination, they are disciplined and loyal with combat skills second to none. They are not afraid. Don’t worry, you’ll be the same once reactivated.”