by Kiki Leach
"Why was she so eager?"
"Not too sure. Nix said she's been quiet since he agreed, and she ain't used anything to say a word to me since I picked her up from his place and brought her out here."
"Why didn't Nix bring her himself?"
"I've got him and Loco hauling in that moon bounce for the kids."
I lowered my eyes to his desk and dropped back. "Is that bullet inside the Bible from Marleena's face?" He rested his elbow on top of the arm of his chair and wiped his hand across his mouth. He looked directly into my eyes while keeping quiet. "Okay. Are you planning to use it to find out who the hell attacked her?"
"That's not exactly your business right now, Cheyenne."
"My head was nearly blown off by being with her -- I think it's just as much my business as it is yours and the rest of the club."
"Who the fuck told your ass to head down there and have a goddamn chat with her about shit that doesn't concern you--?"
"How the hell did she know about the Gambiano's helping to get Nikko out of Rikers?" I interjected. "Chino claims he never said anything to her -- that he hasn't seen her in God knows how long."
"I don't have a goddamn clue about that shit just like I told you before--"
"Do you know who the hell she was working for as a PI?"
"What the fuck does it matter?" he snapped. "You're so goddamn worried about shit you can't control when the one muthafuckin' thing you need to be focused on right now in picking a date for this wedding isn't even at the front of your fuckin' mind."
"It matters because it's obvious that whoever the hell this person is hasn't stopped and won't until they get what they want from her, whether it be death or information. She would've snitched by now otherwise."
"You don't fuckin' know that--"
"You have no idea if I don't. And when I marry Nikko?" I placed my hands on top of his desk and pushed myself to stand. "If I choose to stay that way, you're going to back the hell off."
"You're fuckin' threatening me?"
"I'm making you a simple promise that if you don't stay in your lane when it comes to my relationship outside of what you'll be getting the minute I sign those papers, I'm letting your son know the truth about his father."
He slammed the corner of his fist on top of his desk, pushing it forward; he stood up and pointed directly between my eyes as a wave of venom reached his own. "Fuckin' blackmail, Cheyenne--"
"I'm doing everything you've ever taught me, which includes racking up my privacy outside of you and this club," I said. "I've said it before and will keep repeating myself until it finally sinks in. Any and every idea you have of taking him out is done. Burn it, bury it -- I don't give a damn as long as I never have to hear those words from you or any of the other brothers again, and nothing comes to pass. Are we clear?"
"What the fuck are you gonna do with a dead man walking? Fuck him 'til he's in the goddamn ground?!"
"Find out what the hell it's like to truly love him and have that feeling returned until my heart stops beating long before his."
"You're counting on that shit with this asshole and nobody else?"
"In the exact same way you once counted on it with Deborah."
He shook his head at me and sneered. "You see how the fuck that shit ended."
"I did, and would be damned to have the same."
He dragged his eyes from mine without another word and glared out the window.
I slinked out of his office in silence and headed back outside.
Chapter Forty-Two
Modern Day Fairytale
I sat down on a bench near the field, watching with a weight of fear building inside my chest as Nikko had just finished his attempt to make nice with Deborah.
She turned from him with a smile while wiping what looked to be tears from her eyes before quietly bypassing me and heading back around to the front of the club. Nikko frowned until she disappeared, then stepped forward with a pinch to his mouth and took a seat alongside me.
"What is it?" I asked him.
He pointed to the field as confusion contorted his face. "When we were together the first time," he started, "you mentioned having your tubes tied."
I whipped my head around to him and nodded. "What about it?"
"You ever think about reversing that decision?"
"Not anytime soon. Why?" His eyes lowered as he leaned against the table and gnashed his teeth. I scowled. "What the hell did Deborah say to you out here, Nikko?"
"She won't cop to knowing my old man's cock... barely copped to even knowing his goddamn name outside of shit to do with your club."
"We know she's full of it. What else did she say? Why was she crying?"
"Some shit about Taz that I tuned out, but..." He lazily dragged his eyes to mine and arched his brow. "She mentioned being with you when you got your tubes tied, baby."
"What?"
"We started talking about the kids playing football and she threw out some shit about how you weren't into having any of your own; I never mentioned you telling me about having it done."
"She threw it out there?"
He nodded. "Said the shit was to keep you from making another mistake."
"I never said that," I blurted. "And she was never 'with me' so much as she happened to be on the phone with Nix -- who was -- to finalize the transfer of her portion of the club. That manipulative, lying, two-faced bitch."
"Chey--"
"I knew she couldn't be trusted and you were asking me to make nice with her."
"I wasn't wrong about that shit."
"Like hell." I stood up with plans to move back into the club, but was held back as Nikko slipped a hand around my wrist, holding me back. "I am fighting this bitch," I snapped. He rolled his eyes toward the field of kids as they remained oblivious, and soured. "Trust me when I say they've heard worse around here."
"They shouldn't have to, baby."
I snatched my wrist from his hand and folded my arms. "You're speaking from personal experience? Because of what those kids in the family room saw from you and Dog at Rikers."
"From what I used to see and hear from my old man at their age..." He stood up directly in front of me and stared into my eyes, a cross between dread and concern dancing inside his own. "Is there some place inside we can talk without anybody else around?"
I shifted my attention while reaching for him. "There's a room in the back that should be empty."
Once we moved back into the club, I walked us past the multitude of brothers and their women at the bar, then maneuvered down the hallway before stepping inside the club's 'apartment'.
Nikko shut and locked the door as I crossed the room, and whistled at the decor of scattered biker manuals, porn magazines and pictures of women straddling bikes posted along the walls. He pointed at the bed and grimaced. "This is where you were when we came out here the first time?"
"Yes." I whirled back around to him. "Snake added the room for Taz after he moved out of Deborah's when we were in high school. Neither wanted him going too far and he wasn't willing to move in with anyone else."
"When did he move out?"
"Some time before I left for college."
He sat down on the bed and folded his hands; his shoulders dropped as he stared straight ahead. "Why'd you have your tubes tied, baby?"
I sighed heavily while taking a seat beside him as every part of me nearly collapsed into one. "Because I don't want to have children, Nikko; at least I didn't at the time and never thought I would have a reason for that feeling to change." He looked me in the face and slightly pushed his brows together. A flash of darkness rushed his eyes as he swallowed hard and tightened his jaw. "It was never about keeping me from making 'another' mistake because I'd never gotten pregnant the first time I was with anyone -- which if I had, would not have been the mistake Deborah claims," I said. "But I knew how I grew up and the thought of passing this life onto someone else terrified the hell out of me; it still does. Even getting out of here, no matter ho
w hard I try to never come back, it's clear as day at this point that it will never be permanent. Part of me can live with that while the other part will never be able to reconcile that truth." He waited for a long moment, pondering. I gulped as the nerves rendered me motionless in his silence. "What are you thinking?"
A beat passed before he finally reached for my hand and slid his fingers against my palm. I exhaled, practically melting at his touch as he brought his eyes back to mine. "For a split goddamn second out there, I thought about what the fuck it'd be like to be somebody's old man," he said, a smile parting his lips as his attention turned to the corner of the room. "Being with those kids, seeing how goddamn happy they were despite me kicking their asses on that field..." He chuckled. "The shit brought me back to when I wanted the same attention from Chino; for him to say he was goddamn proud, even for a few motherfuckin' minutes." He slinked his fingers between mine and lifted my hand to his mouth. "I told you I'm with you on this shit no matter what, baby, and I meant it; your decision belongs to you and I'm here to support it."
"I know you believe that and I believe you saying it, but... do you ever want kids for yourself, Nikko?" I asked him. "Maybe someday?"
"Yeah, baby, maybe someday; but the shit ain't coming for me today or tomorrow; what I felt was a goddamn blip -- a good one, but..." He paused and took in a breath; he swallowed hard and bobbed his head. "Either way, I don't think I could ever see myself having kids without you as their mother."
"You say that to me now, but--"
"I'd say it fuckin' always, Cheyenne -- to any goddamn person who ever thought to ask me about it, including you."
I smiled far too wide, unable to help myself from doing otherwise, and cleared my throat. "We could adopt if the time ever called for it? If we changed our minds after all was said and done and truly chose to stick this out in the end."
"Yeah, baby, we could." He grinned and sank his teeth into the back of my hand.
I sucked my bottom lip into my mouth and shivered. "Why the hell are you so much of what I imagined, Nikko Girabaldi? So much of what I've always wanted despite being even more of what I've always feared having for myself?"
"'Cause I'm a dream and motherfuckin' nightmare all rolled into one for you, baby. Always fuckin' will be."
"Is that so?"
"Yeah, baby, fuckin' so." He dropped his hands to my waist and gently lifted me from the bed. I yelped as he dragged me across his lap, then moaned as he shoved me on top of his dick and slid my arms across his shoulders. He bent forward to suckle the center of my neck and moved his hands beneath my shirt, pushing his fingers along my skin until they reached the center of my bra. I shoved my sex against him as he toyed with the idea of releasing my breasts before lowering his hands back to my pants and wrapping them around my behind, squeezing until my hips jerked and my head fell back. My lips parted; I exhaled between them and gulped. "Always so goddamn soft," he muttered, his eyes scanning every inch of me as his dick hardened. "My goddamn dream come true..."
I whimpered and closed my eyes while rolling my fingers through his hair. "Make me come, Nikko... please."
"Always fuckin' begging." I heard the smile in his voice as it deepened; he grunted. "You want it in here?"
"Yes..."
"Right goddamn now?"
"Yes, Nikko... please."
He stood up while continuing to hold me in his arms, then lowered my back to the bed and pushed himself between my legs. I lifted my hand to his face as his skin flushed, as he stared at me with a gleam in his eyes that practically liquified my own, then rolled my fingers down the side of his throat before dropping them along the collar of his shirt. He lifted my other hand to his mouth and kissed the back of my fingers, then stood straight while taking both of my hands inside of his own and dragging them down his chest and stomach, stopping just before they reached his pants.
I lowered my eyes to the bulge at his zipper and licked my lips, then sat up and leaned forward.
He eyed me with a hunger deep enough to devour us both, then released my hands and slipped two fingers beneath my chin; he deeply inhaled, then exhaled as the warm air surrounding us -- engulfing us with desire, skipped across his tongue.
As my head dipped and my jaw dropped, my mouth opened; his thumb brushed along my bottom lip as he sank his teeth into the bottom of his own. "You wanna fuckin' taste me again," he said, gliding his thumb across the tip of my tongue. I wrapped my lips around it as he groaned. "Fuck, baby, I can fuckin' feel that shit."
"Feel me..." I squirmed against the bed while staring directly into his eyes, the heat from an unwavering need for each other setting us ablaze, then reached for his other hand and dragged it across my breasts.
He pinched one of my nipples through my bra and shirt, forcing me to flinch and release him from my mouth. He grinned while sliding his hand around my throat and stroked his thumb along the edge of my jawline. "So fuckin' soft." He bent forward to push his tongue between my lips before kissing me deep enough to send me over the same edge I was certain we had both been dangling from since our first meeting and long after.
I pulled back as soon as he started reaching for my shirt and yanked at his pants, unbuttoning and unzipping until they fell to the floor with his briefs. He took my face in both hands as his fully erect dick wagged between us and kissed me again, then used the weight of his strength to push me back down to the bed.
Helpless by choice, I shoved my hands inside his shirt before removing it completely and clawed at his back. He teasingly nipped at my bottom lip, then used a single hand to push my pants and panties to the floor.
As I spread my legs for him, as I reopened my heart for a man liable to seal it shut the minute our union became official, he reached for himself and stroked my opening.
My eyes closed as I rolled my head aside and moaned. "No, baby." He grunted while grinding against me and dragged his tongue along the side of my throat before lifting his mouth to my jaw and rolling my skin between his teeth. "I wanna fuckin' see the look in your eyes when I'm deep inside you this time."
A smile parted my lips as the warmth from his words left me unable to speak even one of my own.
When I rolled my eyes back to his, he reached for my hands and lifted them above my head, then slipped his fingers between mine and pressed our palms together.
I swallowed hard and readjusted myself against him, then exhaled and focused on his gaze as he pushed himself inside me, deep enough to leave me breathless, enough to leave me aching for more than I knew I deserved, more than I knew I could ever cherish with a man like him, and found home.
Chapter Forty-Three
Secrets Wept
As the heat from the room fell upon my skin, washing across every inch still left on fire from Nikko's touch, I rolled aside and stroked the sweat from his face. "What are you thinking right now?" I asked him. He stared at the ceiling with a silent smile and rubbed his hand across his stomach. I leaned into his face and lowered my mouth to the side of his throat, then pressed my lips against his pulse as it fluttered between my lips like an unsteady drum. His eyes closed as his jaw clinched; I pulled back as he turned his face toward mine and flared his nostrils. "Nikko..." His eyes reopened at the sound of my voice; lust filled each one straight down to the pupil; he swallowed hard and grunted while lifting his hand to my throat. "What is it?"
He pressed his thumb against my chin and leaned in to suckle the corner of my jaw. "I'm thinking you might be the best goddamn thing that's ever happened in my life, baby. To have what I want in a woman who wants what she's got in me -- no conditions, no goddamn demands that I be anything outsida what the fuck I am... the goddamn monster I can be."
"You're still not a monster to me, Nikko."
"So you keep saying, baby. But you're Beauty, remember. I'm the goddamn Beast."
"By choice."
"A beast for you." He chortled and dropped his hand to my left breast, squeezing me until I cried out in need of more, until my nipple hardened
inside his palm, then crawled his fingers to my stomach, tapping them along my skin. "Nothing can beat anything we've been doing -- what the fuck we've already done." His smile returned as he bent forward to kiss each of my breasts; he pushed his hand between my thighs and stroked my slit with his index, then lifted it to his mouth and swiped my taste across his tongue. "Fuckin' sweet."
I wrapped my hands around his face and brought his mouth to mine, my tongue rolling across his bottom lip before sliding it between them. He dipped his hands to the small of my back, pressing his fingers into my skin, then dragged them to my thighs, down my legs and hiked them around his own.
I opened my mouth to take in more of his tongue, but was pulled from the moment as his phone rattled against the floor.
"Fuckin' shit." He groaned.
I smiled to myself and sighed. "It could be important."
"It shouldn't be." He lowered my legs back to the bed, then reached for his pants and shoved his hand inside the front pocket, yanking out his cell. When the buzzing finally stopped, he stared at the number flashing across his screen; a flush lit up his skin as he balled his free hand into a fist and clinched his teeth. "Son of a goddamn bitch."
"What is it?"
He arched a brow and peeked over at me while rattling his head. "First three digits are from Rikers."
"What?" I sat up in a panic and reached for the blankets to cover myself. "Why the hell would someone out there be calling you? Unless it's something to do with Elias?"
"Wouldn't be how he operates after what I did in fuckin' up his plans to have me taken out. Gotta be somebody letting me know the truth about Dog or some other shit. Asshole left a message either way -- and this ain't even my main fuckin' phone." He lept from the bed after sliding on his pants and reaching for his shirt, then dialed his voicemail and crossed the room.
I watched him listen to the message while reaching for my own clothes and shoes, silently vowing to take a shower as soon as we got back home, then stopped moving as he returned to the bed and lowered the phone from his face, his thumb hovering over the keypad.
