Andrea shrugs her shoulders. “Just tell her we were joking around.”
“Yeah, everyone knows we’re into chicks… not dicks,” Vanessa adds as if it’s completely obvious that they’re lesbians.
My eyes slide back to the last place I saw Cassidy before she disappeared. Feeling irritated, I run a hand through my hair.
“Well, we gotta get going.” Andrea flashes me a big bright shiny smile.
“Yeah, see you Saturday!” Vanessa chimes in.
And then they take off as well, leaving me to stand by myself in line at the burger place. I’m seriously debating whether or not to skip lunch altogether when someone steps right into my space. For just a moment, I’m hoping that Cassidy has returned. Even if it is just to chew my ass out.
“You can’t seriously be that much of a douche.”
Definitely not Cassidy.
The urge to squeeze my eyes tightly shut and knock my head against a wall slides its way through me. Because yeah… apparently I am that much of a douche. Luke freaking Wellington is the absolute last person I want to deal with right now because I’m already kicking myself in the ass for letting Cassidy think I have any interest in either Andrea or Vanessa.
Those two are only interested in getting off on each other. And everyone who knows them is aware of that. Now, am I above using their antics to throw off unsuspecting chicks I have zero interest in?
Guilty as charged.
Should I have allowed it to spiral out of control with Cassidy so that she’d get the wrong idea?
Guess I really am a douche.
Worse, I hate playing games which only irritates me more. In an extremely juvenile way (which I am totally owning), I wanted to test the waters to see what her interest level was. I mean, she did walk in here with Luke freaking Wellington. And they looked pretty damn friendly while doing it too...
I just didn’t expect her to fly out of here as abruptly as she did.
“Stay out of it, Wellington. It’s none of your damn business.” I can’t resist curling my lip in disgust. The fact that he’s here, getting in my face over something that has to do with Cassidy, aggravates the shit out of me.
It seriously killed me to let her go, but I can’t be with a girl who is into another guy. And there’s something between Cassidy and Luke. I’m just not sure how deep her feelings for him run. I know he wants her. I see it in his eyes every freaking time he looks at her. Even with all her protests and denials, I totally expected them to get together as soon as I pulled the plug.
It drives me bat shit crazy to even think about it. The dude is one of my teammates, for Christ’s sake. He’s supposed to have my back. He shouldn’t be trying to steal my girl.
Luke’s brows snap together and he has the audacity to look as pissed off as I’m currently feeling. “She likes you, dude. Why’d you go and hurt her like that?”
His words leave me feeling like an even bigger jackass.
And I don’t need that.
Especially from him.
I can’t help but run another frustrated hand through my hair all the while trying to keep my cool. “Look, just stay out of my relationship with Cassidy.” Then I decide to say what’s really on my mind. “What the hell do you even care? I’m sure this is exactly what you wanted to happen.”
He doesn’t look at all surprised by my words. Which only infuriates me even more. Because as much as I know he wants her, the fact that he’s going to stand there and not even bother denying it, has me bunching my fists tightly together.
It takes a moment before he says, “Cassidy is a great girl and if you’re stupid enough to let the friendship I have with her get between the two of you, then you’re not the guy I thought you were. And if that’s the case, then maybe you don’t deserve her after all.”
It’s like someone poured gasoline all over my temper and then lit it on fire. I seriously want to haul off and punch this asshole in his face. “Your friendship,” I snort. “She feels beholden to you. Because you were there that night,” I grit the words out between clenched teeth, “you got her out of a bad situation. And it’s messing with her head.”
Luke takes a step closer and just when I think he might get in my face, he stays put. Blowing out a breath, I make a conscious effort to unclench my fists.
All he does is shake his head as if I’m a total loser. And damn if that doesn’t grate against my last nerve.
“I can’t believe just how wrong I was about you.” His eyes narrow. “I was giving you both time to work your shit out, but you know what? You don’t deserve her.” As if what he’s saying isn’t bad enough, he continues. “Do I want Cassidy? Hell, yeah. And I’m not going to let you stand in my way any longer.” He sneers out the rest, “If you want her, Mathews, then you better do something about it because the gloves are off.” He steps just a bit closer before adding, “And when she’s finally mine, I’ll treat her so damn good that you’ll be nothing more than a tiny blip in her past that she can barely remember.”
There go my hands again. I want nothing more than to throw a punch, but I don’t. God, I want to. But I’m not going to jeopardize my future for a few moments of gratification. I’ve made enough mistakes today. I’m not going to let Luke Wellington get to me.
Instead I snarl, “Fuck you, Wellington.” Unfortunately there is zero satisfaction in growling out those words. I’d rather smash his damn face in.
His lips curl. “Yeah, well, I think you’ve done a fucking fantastic job of screwing yourself sideways where Cassidy is concerned. Good luck with that, man.”
Then he’s gone.
And I’m left standing there feeling like an impotent asshole with my fists clenched and a nasty pit gnawing at the bottom of my gut because I’m afraid that Luke freaking Wellington is right in his assessment of the situation. I’ve totally fucked myself with my stupidity and jealousy as far as Cassidy is concerned. For the first time in my life, I really don’t know what to do.
I’m honestly afraid that it might be too late to get her back.
Chapter Twenty
The ice is the only place where I can lose myself anymore. Passing the puck to one of my wingers, I fall back to guard our goal. I don’t want to think about just how disastrous, not to mention- non-existent, my relationship with Cole has become. How is it possible that almost a month ago I couldn’t imagine us being apart?
And now-
A hard hit from the left literally knocks me off my skates. Flying through the air, I crash into the ice before rolling onto my back and gasping for breath. Even with all my padded protection, it hurts like hell. My eyes water as I fight to find my bearings. I haven’t been hit like that in years. It feels like the very life has been knocked right out of me. Finally opening my dazed eyes, I stare up into Sammy’s narrowed blue ones.
What the fuck!
I can’t believe she just trucked into me like that!
When I’m finally able to inhale enough oxygen, it still takes a few moments before I can grit out actual words. “What the hell, Sammy!”
She shrugs her broad shoulders which look even more massive underneath all the padding. “It’s not my fault you weren’t paying attention.”
“So that’s a reason to take me out?” Is there something seriously wrong with this girl? Like major mental issues? Because rule number one in hockey is that you don’t freaking hurt your own teammates. And she just broke it. I’m just hoping that’s all she broke.
My eyes swing to the rest of the girls who have all stopped skating to form a tight circle around us. It becomes apparent by the way most are shifting uncomfortably and avoiding my eyes that none of them are going to get involved in this skirmish. I can’t exactly blame them for that. Sammy is our captain. And I’ve only recently joined the team.
And… well… she’s Sammy.
I wouldn’t want to go against her either. So, although I’m disappointed that no one is willing to stand up for me, I unfortunately understand their reasoning. Even though my e
ntire body hurts, I scramble to my skates not wanting to keep looking up at her from my sprawled out position on the ice.
Feeling my temper rise, I skate towards her until we’re cage to cage. What just happened out there has absolutely nothing to do with me being caught unawares and everything to do with Cole.
And don’t think I don’t know it.
“If you have a problem, take it up with me off the ice.” I’m so angry that I’m shaking. “Especially since we both know this has absolutely nothing to do with hockey.”
Her eyes narrow as she sneers, “And what if I want to take it up with you right now?”
There’s no way in hell I can back down from this fight. I would never be able to hold my head up again with this team. I’d have to quit. So, as much as it sucks major ass, I grit out, “Then let’s go.” I’m on the verge of throwing down my gloves and whipping off my helmet.
If I have to…
She holds my eyes for a long challenging moment. I can almost feel everyone’s collective breath being held as the tension in the rink ratchets up another notch. This won’t be the first skirmish I’ve ever been in.
Although I’ve never been in a fist fight with a member of my own team before.
So that’s new.
Finally Sammy cocks her head to the side before saying loudly enough for everyone surrounding us to hear, “Let’s grab something to eat after this and we’ll hash it all out then.”
My whole body sags as I exhale a relieved breath because I really wasn’t looking forward to getting my ass handed to me. And she would have. I’m not delusional, after all. “Fine.”
In the blink of an eye, everyone splinters apart as if a fight didn’t almost erupt and we’re back to scrimmaging again. But strangely it feels as if the thick undercurrent of tension that has been brewing between us has been dispelled. Which doesn’t exactly make sense since nothing has been resolved but I’m certainly not going to question it at this point.
For the rest of our ninety minute practice, I throw myself full throttle into the drills and scrimmage. When I get home tonight, I want to be so completely wiped that I fall right into bed and sleep without dwelling too much on Cole.
Freshly showered, I wait for Sammy to grab her bag before we walk out of the arena side by side. Neither of us say much as we slide into her crappy little Toyota. When she pulls out into traffic at break neck speed, I’m reminded as to why I’m always scrambling for alternative rides to the rink.
Her car should come with a warning label- not for people with heart conditions, high blood pressure, nervous stomachs, etc. The girl drives like she’s qualifying for the Indy 500.
Little bits and pieces of my life flash before my eyes as she squeals around another turn. Not wanting to encourage her (because I’ve learned that my pointing and high pitched yelps will do that), I gnash my teeth rather painfully into my lower lip to stifle the rising screams.
“Dawsons Diner, okay?” She doesn’t even glance in my direction, instead keeping her eyes focused on the road ahead.
Tightlipped, I reply, “Yep.” Thank god it’s not far.
I swear it’s no more than two minutes later when she pulls abruptly into a parking space. Feeling woozy, I exit the car as fast as humanly possible.
Once we’re seated at a small table and my stomach starts to settle from the erratic drive over, I glance at the menu. The waitress delivers two waters and takes our order before disappearing again.
With no menus to focus our attention on, Sammy and I glance warily at each other. She starts drumming her fingers on the table as I shift uncomfortably in my seat.
“Look, Cassidy,” she finally sighs, “I like you.”
Cocking my head at her opening line, I drawl out my response, “I would really hate to see what you do to people you don’t like.”
Smirking, one side of her mouth slides up. “Actually, you don’t want to see that.” She’s probably right. “But my point is that I like you. And I really liked you with Cole.”
Not saying another word, I simply nod.
“And the fact that you were into Luke Wellington the entire time you were seeing my cousin seriously chafes my ass.” Leaning towards me, fire suddenly leaps into her eyes. “I told you in the beginning not to hurt him.” Sitting back, her face fills with disgust. “You’re no freaking better than that bitch Jackie.”
With wide eyes, I shake my head. “Sammy, Luke and I have never been anything other than friends.”
Cocking an eyebrow, she looks dubious. “I thought you two didn’t even know each other.”
There are three other people at Western who know what happened to me last year. And Sammy isn’t one of them. Me flunking out, getting kicked off the hockey team, getting wasted and sleeping around isn’t something I like to broadcast. Frankly it’s embarrassing as hell that I made such a colossal mess out of my life.
As much as I like Sammy, and I really do, she’s Cole’s cousin first and foremost. Her allegiance is to him. It always will be. And I wouldn’t expect anything less. But her jumping automatically onto his side without even talking to me about it hurts because I thought we were more than just teammates. I thought we were friends.
We actually have a lot in common, hockey being the most obvious.
Her mad driving skills, not so much.
But that friendship stalled when Cole and I broke up. And that really sucks. I was hoping we could have a relationship independent of him. But obviously that’s not possible.
Because I spent all of my teenage years focusing on hockey, always trying to climb to the next level, I sacrificed a lot of friendships along the way. There was just never any time to nurture that kind of relationship. Brooklyn, who was my neighbor while growing up, was more of an acquaintance than anything else. And I started out this semester pretty much keeping to myself, trying to get my life under control, so making friends wasn’t exactly high on my priority list.
For a long moment I debate just how much to tell Sammy, if anything at all. I’m not ready to spill my guts to her. And honestly, she hasn’t exactly earned my trust either. But maybe if I tell her some of the truth, she’ll have a better understanding of my relationship with Luke. At this point, that’s all I really want.
“Luke and I actually attended the same college last year. We both played hockey there.” Sammy’s dark blonde brows knit together but I don’t give her a chance to start firing questions at me. “But we weren’t friends.” It’s carefully that I add, “I only recognized him after I started seeing Cole.”
She tilts her head to the side before saying, “Well, you certainly seem chummy now.”
I nod just once. “Something happened last year- something I’m not going to talk about but Luke was there.” I pause, thinking carefully about my words. “He got me out of a really bad situation,” I add slowly. “Once we sat down and talked about it, it just seemed natural for us to be friends.” Then I stress, “But we’ve never been anything more than that. I like Luke, but it’s as a friend and he knows that.”
My words seem to roll around in her head as she silently considers them. Taking a deep breath, she blows it out slowly. Just as she’s about to say something, our food is placed in front of us by Gina, our waitress. We both thank her before she takes off to check on her other tables.
The smell of my cheese and mushroom omelet hits me and I suddenly realize just how hungry I am. Without further words, we both dig in. Demolishing our plates in less than ten minutes. There is no slow methodical chewing and savoring for either one of us. After a ninety minute practice, we’re both famished.
Once our plates are scraped clean, we both sit back, sipping our diet sodas.
Finally Sammy asks, “So why doesn’t Cole believe that you two are just friends?”
Caught off guard by the question, I just stare at her as I grapple for an answer. “I guess it’s because Luke and I have started spending more time together.”
“Uh huh.”
Seriously… th
at’s all she’s got to say?
With her eyes trained on me, she patiently waits for me to continue. Fidgeting under her intense scrutiny, I actually find myself scrambling to explain. Which suddenly makes this thing between us feel like an impromptu therapy session. I know Sammy is planning to go to school for sports medicine. I’m starting to suspect that she’s missing her calling as a therapist.
“He thinks Luke is interested in more than just friendship.”
Her expression doesn’t change. “And is he?”
Flushing, my eyes drop to the table. “Maybe,” I can’t help but add hastily, “But nothing has ever happened between us. We’re just friends.” I can’t help but emphasize the friends part. Although I’m not sure it does any good.
Sammy rolls her eyes before she actually starts laughing. “Jesus, Cassidy! How would that make you feel? Having your new boyfriend hang around with some other girl who you knew liked him? So here’s this friend,” she uses air quotes around the word as if it’s totally debatable, “who is patiently biding their time waiting for your relationship with Cole to fall apart.”
Sammy shakes her head looking somewhat disgusted. “And Luke’s a teammate. His partner on the ice!” She takes a lengthy sip of her drink as she continues eyeing me as if I’m nothing more than a bug smashed across the windshield of her deathtrap.
Which, consequently, is exactly where I feel like I belong.
Is that really how Cole saw it? Like he was being betrayed, not only by his girlfriend, but his teammate as well?
I think about how he saw us at the Union, looking as if I was going to let Luke kiss me. Or when I left the Halloween party and grabbed coffee with him. Or, right before we broke up, when I was studying with Luke at the library. Instead of hearing about it from me, Luke was the one who inadvertently busted me. And lastly, I think about Cole and how angry he was out on the ice. How he and Luke were getting into it.
Yeah… it’s not looking so good for me.
But what can I do about it now?
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