Amazing Grace

by Amazing Grace (retail) (epub)

  ‘So, as I’m not sure what sort of films you like, I’m going to give you a choice of two and let you pick if that’s OK? We could either see that new Melissa McCarthy comedy or the new Tom Cruise action film. Which would you prefer?’

  Grace knew that she had to stop comparing Vinnie to Mark but, on the very rare occasions that they’d ever had a night out at the pictures, he’d told her what he was going to see and she was asked if she wanted to go along. To have a choice was a real treat.

  ‘Being a massive Melissa McCarthy fan, that would be my choice, if you don’t mind, that is.’

  ‘To be honest with you, Grace, I’m really glad you said that. I can’t bloody stand that little short-arse! I just thought I’d give you the option in case you had a crush on him.’

  He grinned at her and her heart skipped a beat. He was looking so handsome tonight. The blue of his t-shirt set off his twinkly cornflower-blue eyes perfectly. God, he’d make beautiful children, she thought, suddenly reining herself in as her mind worked overtime.

  They chatted comfortably about their respective weekends. He’d enjoyed some time with Ruth and her family, and Grace told him about their weekend in Wales. He seemed to be really interested in finding out more about Archie. He had two nieces and a nephew, and talked about how much he loved spending time with them, so he certainly wasn’t a stranger to having kids around. Always a good point when you were single and had a child. Before they knew it, they’d arrived at the cinema.

  ‘My treat,’ Vinnie said, as he paid the cashier before Grace even had a chance to get her purse out of her handbag.

  While Mark had always been generous, he’d also always made her feel that she should be grateful that he kept them clothed and housed, despite the fact that Grace was looking after their child and felt she earned it. But with Vinnie, she had the feeling that he was just trying to be a gentleman. Grace loved the fact that now she was working, she had money of her own to spend. She was still getting used to that after being a stay-at-home mum for the biggest part of Archie’s life.

  ‘Well, in that case, I insist on buying the popcorn and the drinks,’ she said.

  The film was hilarious. They both laughed till tears streamed down their cheeks and chatted about it all the way back to Grace’s house. This time, when Vinnie pulled up, she asked him if he had to be up early or whether he wanted a coffee. It was only just after ten o’clock.

  ‘And I do mean coffee, young man!’ she said jokingly when his eyebrows raised cheekily.

  They’d had such a lovely evening but the thought of anything more at this stage, even though she really liked him, just made her feel sick with nerves.

  ‘Go on then, I’ll have a quick one,’ he said.

  This time Grace raised her eyebrows at him, and as he realised how wrong that sounded, he blushed. Grace laughed at him as they headed into the house. It felt good to laugh and she realised again how comfortable she was around Vinnie, even after just a short time.

  While the kettle was boiling, Vinnie stood close to her and her nerves were tingling. She bit her lip as his head bent down towards her, and his lips were what seemed like a millimetre from hers when her mobile rang. After a second or two he stepped back, and she grabbed her handbag and fished her phone out. It was Mark.

  ‘I’m so sorry but I’m going to have to take this. It’s Archie’s dad.’

  ‘Of course. Can I just pop to your loo?’

  She pointed to the doorway at the side of the kitchen.

  ‘Mark, is everything OK?’ she breathed into the phone.

  ‘Not really no!’ Mark replied. ‘Archie has got a really high temperature, said he feels sick and he’s just crying and crying and saying he wants his mum. Can you pop round?’

  Grace sighed. She knew that Archie would have to come first. ‘Of course I will. I’ll leave straight away,’ she said.

  Vinnie walked out of the toilet and caught the tail end of the conversation. ‘Do you need to go?’ he asked.

  ‘I’m so sorry, Vinnie, but Archie needs me, he’s really poorly.’

  ‘That’s OK, love, I understand that your son comes first.’ He sounded really dejected. ‘But will you ring me later and let me know how he is? I want to make sure you’re both OK.’

  ‘Sure will, and I’m so very sorry, Vinnie, I’ve had such a great evening again. I hope we can meet up again soon.’

  ‘I’d love to if you would,’ he replied. ‘Let’s speak later and sort something out. It doesn’t matter what time you phone me, I’ll be waiting for your call.’ He took her face in his hands and looked deep into her eyes then closed his eyes and kissed her long and lingeringly on the lips.

  ‘Mmm…’ She heard a low guttural moan then realised that the noise was coming from her.

  ‘Until next time,’ he said, walking her towards the front door.

  She picked up her car keys and handbag and headed for her own car, waving as he pulled away.

  It took ten minutes to get to Mark’s house. As a family they had originally all lived in a new-build on a development, which Mark had chosen and she’d thought she liked. It wasn’t until after they’d decided to split up and sold the house that she realised that she’d never really felt at home there. She could go for days without seeing a soul. Most people left to go to work in the morning, and returned home without conversing with the neighbours, keeping themselves very much to themselves. That was hard when she was at home all day with a small child and no friends.

  Mark now lived on the fourth floor of a modern apartment block, which was nearer to his work, and she had to park miles away from the front door. She rang the intercom and he kept her waiting for at least five minutes and she had to ring three times before he clicked the latch.

  Why didn’t he just open the door if he knew she was on the way up, she puzzled, but then realised that it was part of his controlling behaviour. He liked to keep people waiting, he did it all the time. He was still trying to control her, even now. She wasn’t even sure he realised that he did it, but figured that it was part of his self-important persona.

  Mark opened the door and stood back, letting her in. The room opened straight into the lounge and Grace spotted Archie sitting on the sofa bed. Mark’s apartment had only one bedroom so when Archie stayed over he had to sleep on a sofa bed in the lounge, which meant that he never got to go to bed very early. For a head teacher, Mark’s own parenting decisions often left a lot to be desired. How he had the nerve to question the parents in the school and make judgements about their parenting styles always made Grace wonder.

  ‘Hey, Mum!’ he said as she walked straight over to him. ‘You OK?’

  ‘I’m OK, darling, more to the point, are you?’ she asked him.

  ‘Yes, I’m fine thanks. I felt a bit sick but I think it was because Dad made me eat something I didn’t like for tea. I feel fine now though. And Dad’s turned the heating off now so I’m not so hot any more! What are you doing here anyway?’

  ‘Your dad asked me to come. He said you were crying and wanted me,’ she said, glancing at Mark suspiciously as he walked into the kitchen.

  ‘Did he? That’s strange. I told him not to disturb you because I knew you were going out with your friend tonight,’ he said, with emphasis on the word ‘friend’.

  So that was what it was all about. Mark just wanted to spoil her evening. It seemed like every time she planned to do something nice in her life, he spoilt it. He’d been doing it for years. He was like a naughty, selfish child who didn’t want anyone else to have anything nice.

  ‘Where’s Lorraine?’ Grace asked, following Mark into the kitchen.

  ‘She’s staying over at her friend’s tonight so they can have a drink,’ he replied. ‘But while she is out of the way, have you thought any more about what I said earlier about us getting back together?’

  ‘No I haven’t, Mark.’ Grace raised her voice at him in frustration. ‘You can’t just expect an answer from me to a question like that! It’s something that w
e would both have to think very seriously about before even considering.’

  ‘Well, I know it’s what I want. When you realise it’s the right thing to do for our son, our son that you’re supposed to love with all your heart, our son that you’d do anything for, then perhaps you’d like to let me know.’

  Mark had always managed to rile her. He was such a contradiction. Sometimes a self-obsessed, patronising jerk who frustrated her beyond words. If she didn’t agree with him, she was wrong. If she had an opinion, she was having a go at him. If she asked him to do something, she was nagging. But then there was nice Mark, the one who charmed the pants off her the moment she met him, who wined and dined her and won her over and proposed when they were expecting a baby. The Mark who said he’d love her forever.

  The trouble with people that were constantly manipulative but nice from time to time, is that for some reason you remembered the nice moments more than the nasty ones. Human nature, she supposed. But it didn’t help when trying to make an important decision.

  She walked back into the lounge and kissed Archie on the head and he looked up at her with his baby-blue eyes. ‘Mum, can I come home with you? Now you’re here I just want to be with you.’

  She looked at Mark. ‘Go on then,’ he said. ‘Take him back with you, as long as it’s not going to spoil your evening.’ He smirked at her.

  ‘It’s a bit late for that, as you very well know,’ she said through gritted teeth. ‘Come on, sweetheart, pop your dressing gown and your slippers on and let’s get you home’.

  Archie went into the bathroom to get his slippers. When he returned, he threw his arms around his dad and Mark ruffled his hair and kissed the top of his head.

  ‘Bye, Daddy.’

  ‘Love you, son.’

  This exchange between father and his son was another tug at Grace’s heartstrings.

  Chapter Sixteen

  When she got back, she settled Archie into bed as quickly as possible, as it was now nearly eleven o’clock and it was a school night. Remembering her promise, she texted Vinnie to say that she was home. Within seconds, her phone rang and his name flashed up on the screen.

  ‘Hey you!’ he said, and just hearing his gorgeous, smooth velvety voice made her feel safe and calm again. ‘So how’s your boy?’

  ‘Nothing wrong with him, it was just his father being difficult,’ she replied.

  ‘So what’s the score with you two, then? We’ve not really talked about that, have we?’ Vinnie asked gently.

  ‘Nothing really to say. Like so many couples, I suppose we just outgrew each other. He can be a great dad to Archie when he tries but can make my life quite difficult if he feels like it.’

  ‘Can I ask you something, Grace?’

  ‘Anything you want.’

  ‘Is there ever any possibility that you’ll get back together, do you think? I really, really like you Grace and I think and hope that you really like me too but I don’t want to come between you and him if there was a chance that you might become a family again.’

  Grace thought about what he had said. Did she want to be a family again with Mark, to give Archie another chance to have his mum and dad under the same roof?

  ‘Vinnie, I can’t deny that sometimes in the past I’ve got lonely and thought about what might have been and how good it would be to have my son with me all the time and not to share him. But, although Archie sometimes says that he’d love us all to be back together again, I know I don’t want to go back to the life I had.’

  ‘OK, so it’s alright for us to carry on seeing each other? Because, Grace, I have to tell you, I really feel that we have something special. I’ve not felt like this about anyone for a very long time. When I think about you, I get a goofy grin on my face and I think that means that I like you. A lot!’

  ‘I like you too, Vinnie,’ she said softly. ‘I know we’ve not known each other long but I want to know more about you. I want to know everything about you. I feel like we’re going to enjoy getting to know each other.’

  ‘Me too, Grace. And perhaps tonight had to happen for us to have this conversation. Now get yourself off to sleep and let’s speak tomorrow night. How does that sound?’

  ‘That sounds really good, thanks, Vinnie. Goodnight.’

  ‘Goodnight, Grace,’ he whispered and disconnected the call.

  Grace realised this was the downside of dating when you’re far past your flighty early twenties; the people that you enter into relationships with have ‘baggage’. She tried to put herself in Vinnie’s shoes, but she didn’t know how she would cope if the roles were reversed.

  * * *

  Ooh, I could bloody kill that Mark with my bare hands sometimes. If he loves you, he needs to show it all the time. I do hope you don’t let him spoil things for you! You have some important decisions to make, darling. I hope for everyone’s sake, you find it in your heart to make the right ones. I wish I was there to talk things through with you. You have to think about yourself, not just Archie. It has to be right for all of you. Just take your time and make the right decision. Love you, Mum xxx

  Chapter Seventeen

  Grace had an hour to spare the following day between house-viewing appointments, so she popped into Coffee Heaven to have a change of scenery. It was really quiet and there was no sign of Ruth, so she ordered a gingerbread latte and, although she looked at the cakes, was quite pleased with herself when she decided not to have one. The young girl who took the order said that she’d bring it over to her, so she took a comfy armchair by the window so she could watch the world go by.

  ‘Hi, Grace darling, how are you?’ She looked up to see Ruth smiling down at her.

  ‘Oh hey, Ruth, I’m great thanks. I didn’t think you were here today when I didn’t see you behind the counter.’

  ‘I was just out the back with the delivery driver. Ooh, that sounded worse than it actually was – I should be so lucky! Are you on your own or meeting someone?’

  ‘No, just on my own. I had a house-viewing appointment but it was just cancelled. The couple have split up. I suppose it’s a good job that they’ve done it now rather than after moving in together. So I thought I’d come in here and grab a coffee. Are you too busy to join me?’

  ‘I’d love to, if you’re sure. I know when you’re a mum you don’t get much me time, so I don’t want to spoil your peace and quiet.’

  Grace laughed to herself as she remembered that when Archie was a toddler he used to ask her if she’d like a ‘piece of quiet’. ‘It would be nice to have some company,’ she responded.

  ‘So, I may as well ask at the start rather than building up to it,’ Ruth said as she sat on the opposite armchair and put her drink down on the coffee table. ‘How’s it going with my bro? I hear you went out for a meal and then out again to the pics last night.’

  ‘We did indeed,’ Grace could feel her face light up as she talked about the evenings that she’d had out with Vinnie. ‘He’s lovely, isn’t he?’

  ‘Well, obviously he’s my brother and I’m not going to say he’s an arse, even if he was, but he’s actually not! He’s so lovely. I worry about him all the time. He works too hard, but it’s been so lovely to see him with a spring in his step and a glint in his eye since he met you, Grace. You seem to get on so well together and I’d love to see more of you too. I think he’s a little fearful about your ex and whether he’s going to get caught up in the middle and that’s my concern too, to be truthful. So I do hope you don’t mind me asking what the score is on that front?’

  ‘Mark and I knew each other at school and we went out briefly just before we went to university. He’d always wanted to be a teacher and I’d always wanted to work in interior design. At university it was clear we were moving forward in two completely different directions. I wanted a family and a family life. I come from a very loving family and my parents had been married for over fifty years when I lost my mum and it tore the whole family to pieces. We were all devastated.

  ‘We split up
then and met up again a few years later, he’d done his time at uni and was a qualified teacher. He moved back to our home town and we started dating and fell in love all over again. I’d been off living my life and having holidays with my friends and was ready to settle down and so was Mark.

  ‘A couple of years later, I found out I was pregnant. Mark wasn’t overjoyed, but then when Archie came along he changed and became the model father. We got married and were so happy but then as Archie grew up, he changed again, especially when he became a head teacher. It was as if he was jealous of his own son. He started to resent the time I was spending with Archie. He was a baby, for goodness’ sake, he couldn’t do anything for himself, unlike Mark, who was an adult. When Archie was a toddler, I found out that Mark had been cheating on me with a woman at work. You can imagine how gutted I was. I felt like I’d been cut open with a knife and had my heart torn out.

  ‘I realised that he just didn’t want to settle down but I couldn’t split my family up. Even after everything he’d done, I couldn’t take my boy away from his father. So we muddled on.

  ‘Then eventually it all came to a head when I found out that he was still seeing her. He’d promised me after the last time that it was all over. He said he’d given her up and that we were all he wanted but then I found out it was happening again. And that was the last straw for me. I knew that we should be worth more to him than that, so we went our separate ways.’

  Ruth nodded in agreement. ‘It’s tough isn’t it, when you know what you should do, but feel that you can’t.’

  ‘It’s really tough, Ruth. You’re a mum and you know that you’d do anything for your children, wouldn’t you? So I thought it was something that I had to put up with. So I learned to live that way,’ Grace said, sadly. ‘He didn’t love me the way he should, we lived separate lives but in the same house. It was no life for either of us to be honest and certainly not for Archie. People used to think that I was a single mum, even before I was one for real.