Finding Justice (Dancing Moon Ranch Book 12)

by Patricia Watters

  It was odd how with her phobias her mind seemed to compartmentalize things when it came to Mario. His body covering hers after the bombing meant protection. His arm around her meant security. At the farm and ranch store, when he held her close, she never felt restricted, only safe, and after her boxing session, when he held her and kissed her, she had no desire to be anywhere but in his arms. And now, the thought of him covering her body with his while holding her in his arms and kissing her, and making love to her, had made its way into that special compartment reserved for the only man she thought she could ever truly love, the man destiny brought to her when she was buried alive, and again just after she arrived at the ranch. Her soulmate.

  After she broke off the engagement with Cole, and she couldn't stop thinking about Mario, she started reading about guardian angels, which introduced her to the concept of soulmates and the notion that each soul had a perfect match—the person intended to help you complete yourself, someone you couldn't walk away from—which explained her inability to let Mario go. Yet, months after the bombing, when he still hadn't tried to contact her, she went back to the guardian angel notion. But she knew now why he'd never tried to get in touch with her, even though he'd wanted to, which had her thinking about soulmates again.

  She remembered reading that throughout a lifetime, one can love many people and theoretically marry and spend their life with someone who'd make them happy enough, but they'd know intuitively they're not with the right person, which would have been Cole had they married. But when one finds their soulmate there's an intense connection unlike anything they've ever experienced, and the connection remains even when they're apart, so it's never a matter of forcing the relationship to work, but simply letting it unfold, because they've found the person they were destined to be with, and once found, can't imagine being without them.

  Her thoughts were interrupted when Mario turned his horse around, and after telling Sergei to wait where he was, started riding toward her. Irina was holding the reins with Mario, and she was smiling broadly, like she was excited, and Mario, with his navy wool hat pulled down over his ears, and his face flushed from the cold, and his eyes alive with enthusiasm, was about as handsome as a man could be. "How are you doing?" he asked.

  "I'm doing fine," Julia replied, and felt a little ripple of pleasure with her announcement.

  "Then you're okay going a little further?" Mario asked. "Jesse told Sergei about a rock formation that looks like a dinosaur, and Sergei wants to see it. It shouldn't be too far from here. Just ahead, is where the creek cuts into the ravine, and the rock is supposed to be another few hundred feet farther, maybe a half mile at most."

  Julia looked beyond Mario, and seeing the enthusiasm on Sergei's face, shoved aside her usual litany of internal deliberations, and said, "I'm fine. Let's go see the dinosaur."

  Mario looked at her thoughtfully, then he reached out and squeezed her arm, and said, "You're beating this thing, and I'm proud of you."

  And all Julia could think of was having him in her cabin later. They wouldn't make love because she needed to prove to him, and to herself, that he wasn't her crutch to lean on, and she couldn't be sure he wasn't, but she also wanted to know where their relationship stood. Before this outing, he feared she was still trapped with her phobias, and although dark thoughts still invaded her mind at times, she coped by diverting those thoughts and focusing on things that mattered in her life. People who mattered. Like Mario, and Irina, and Sergei—the makings of a family—another seed that was beginning to take root. But she couldn't set aside the fact that Mario still planned to leave without her, and Sergei and Irina were scheduled to return to foster care after New Year's, and that was only a week away. The thought of the kids being whisked off to another foster family was troubling. It could be a family who didn't understand Irina, or she could be put in a situation where she could be abused. It happened. But for now she'd set those troubling thoughts aside and concentrate on their outing.

  As they travelled over a well-trampled trail left by earlier riders, Julia looked up at the steep, snow-covered mountain slope to her right. Crystals of snow, catching the high afternoon sun, sparkled like trillions of tiny lights, and a short distance from the trail, a clear mountain stream bubbled up out of the ice and made its way between snowy embankments and down a rocky ravine. As she took in the scene before her, she couldn't remember when she'd seen a more beautiful sight, like the kind on Christmas cards, with glitter to make the snow appear to sparkle.

  Just ahead, Mario pulled his horse to a stop and looked up at the mountainside, but instead of the face of a man appreciating the scene, he looked concerned.

  "Why are we stopping?" Sergei asked.

  "I was just looking at that snowpack," Mario replied, pointing to the slope. "After a heavy snowfall where you have wet snow, you always want to keep an eye out for steep snow-covered slopes because the new layer of snow buildup can slide off the old, causing a snowslide."

  "Are we still gonna see the dinosaur rock?" Sergei asked.

  Mario looked ahead to where the trail widened and leveled off, and into the distance, where there was a huge rock formation. "Yeah, we'll go, but let's get on past this area." He kicked his horse and started up again.

  As they continued on, when Julia looked again at the sparkling slope, she felt a twinge of apprehension, the first since they left the stable. Immediately, she looked away from the slope and at Mario's broad back and squared shoulders, and her nervousness began to fade. She prided herself on the fact that she wasn't apprehensive for illogical reasons, but because Mario had pointed out a potential danger, something to be aware of, but not to have a panic attack over.

  Once beyond the steep slope, where the mountainside was again an easy gradient, Julia relaxed and looked ahead to where the big, snow-covered rock formation was beginning to take on the shape of a dinosaur, the kind with a high arched back. A row of rocks along the crest of the mound stuck up through the snow, appearing like plates along the spine of a dinosaur.

  "That's so cool!" Sergei yelled. "It's a stegosaurus. We read about them in school. They were like thirty feet long, they only ate plants, and their brains could fit inside a walnut shell, so they weren't very smart. Can we go see it?"

  "Maybe for a few minutes," Mario replied, "but then we need to head back. I didn't like the look of that steep slope we just passed, and with the high afternoon sun shining directly on it like it is, conditions are ripe for a wet-snow avalanche."

  "Like everything around here would be covered in snow?" Sergei asked.

  "No, only the area beneath the slope," Mario replied. "Wet snow avalanches travel slowly, so they're not as dangerous as dry-snow avalanches, but they can still gain momentum if there's a big enough volume of snow. We'll dismount here for a few minutes then head back."

  Julia reined in and dismounted, then walked over to where Mario was also dismounting. Reaching up, Mario took Irina in his arms and held her, while saying, "The snow's pretty deep so I'd better carry you." He looked back at Julia, and added, "I forgot, she doesn't hear."

  "That's okay, she looks like she's enjoying the ride," Julia said, while watching Irina wrap her arms around Mario's neck.

  Mario closed his arms around Irina and smiled, like he was okay carrying a little girl, then Julia remembered he'd been with Jeremy and Billy through the birth of their two children, one of which was a three-year-old girl, who called him Uncle Mario, so he did have some knowledge about pintsized females, which tugged at Julia's heart strings. But Mario's smile quickly faded when Sergei hastened his steps in the deep snow and headed for the rock formation.

  "Sergei, wait!" Mario called out. "Don't walk out there because you never know what's lying beneath a blanket of snow, but if you stand where you are, I'll take a picture of you in front of a stegosaurus, and you can show it to your school buddies."

  "Far out!" Sergei yelled, then backed a ways and stood for his photo.

  Mario shifted Irina to the crook of one
arm and reached into his jacket pocket for his cell phone, which he held up, capturing several pictures. He was in the process of returning his phone to his pocket when a noise like loud static filled the air, followed by a whirring sound like wind being blown through an amplifier combined with waves washing up on shore. The horses, hearing the sounds, bolted and headed towards the ranch, which was in the direction of the sounds, only to stop short some distance away and stand in a group.

  Mario turned Irina over to Julia and called Sergei to stand with them, then headed down the trampled snow path to where the horses were standing. After mounting his horse, he took the reins of Sergei's horse and headed up the trail, with Julia's horse loping behind. Once back, he said to Julia, "A snowslide blocked the trail about where we stopped and it'll be several days before it melts." He pulled out his cell phone again, and when he got no signal, he said, "Let's head for the cabin where I can call the Hansens. Looks like we'll be staying there until the snow melts, or a crew can come dig through it."

  As they were riding abreast across a wide-open area covered in deep snow, Julia felt amazingly calm, which made no sense, other than she'd programmed herself over the years to anticipate trouble, and in doing so, react to minor incidences like Mario suggested. But now they were trapped on the wrong side of a snowslide, which wasn't a small thing, but she was trapped with Mario, which was like a dream come true, being able to spend whole days and nights with a man who filled her heart with joy, and in an environment where she'd feel safe.

  With that last thought, she started laughing because safe to her now was being stranded several miles from the ranch.

  Mario looked at her in bafflement. "You want to fill me in on what's behind that laugh?"

  Julia gave a little shrug. "I was just feeling happy."

  "Happy to be stranded on a mountaintop?" Mario asked.

  "Being stranded doesn't matter," Julia said. "I have my guardian angel with me."

  When Mario didn't reply, Julia realized she'd placed a burden on him, a certain expectation that her happiness and wellbeing was dependent on him, which it was. But she didn't want him to be a part of her life out of some kind of twisted obligation because of the hours they'd spent trapped together years before, but because he wanted to be in her life because he couldn't see life without her, the way she felt about him. The way it was with soulmates.

  ***

  On reaching the cabin Mario turned Irina over to Julia then retrieved his cell phone and called Jack. After explaining the situation, Jack said, "The cabin's well-stocked with provisions, there are several sleeping bags in the closet in the bedroom, and there's plenty of wood on the front porch, so if you'll be okay for tonight, tomorrow morning I'll send the boys up to clear the trail, or I could take a different trail and lead you back another way."

  "Tomorrow's Christmas," Mario said. "You can't take your boys away from their families. We'll be okay for a couple of days, and if there's a saw around, I'll cut a tree and Julia will figure out how to decorate it." He visualized Julia's cabin, and he had a gut feeling she'd have the mountain cabin looking like a Christmas card by evening. Although he'd never bothered setting things out at his place, except maybe a few cards if they came, he didn't mind the idea of a woman going to all that fuss. No, not a woman. One woman…

  "There's an axe and a hand saw in the mudroom at the back of the cabin," Jack continued, "and on the shelf in the bedroom closet is a box with a supply of new games, books, puzzles and coloring books to replace the old ones as they wear out. Take whatever you want for the kids. But you'll have to work out your own sleeping arrangements."

  "I'll leave that to Julia," Mario said. "And don't worry. We'll be fine."

  "How is Julia doing?" Jack asked.

  "She's doing fine," Mario replied. "By the time we return she could be back in circulation."

  "I'll pass that on to Howard. I'll also let everyone know what's going on," Jack said.

  "Thanks, and we'll see you the day after Christmas."

  After ending the call, Mario walked over to where Julia was holding all three horses, and said, "Looks like we'll be here until the day after tomorrow, when a crew of cowboys will clear the trail."

  "What about Christmas?" Julia asked. "The kids will get nothing."

  Mario looked toward the cabin where Sergei and Irina were peering through one of the windows, and said, "There's a box in the bedroom closet with an assortment of new books and games. Meanwhile, I'll take care of the horses, and you can introduce the kids to the outhouse."

  Taking all three horses from Julia, Mario unsaddled them and turned them into the corral, and after placing the saddles on saddle trees inside a crude tack room off the loafing shed, he put several flakes of hay in a hay rack for the horses, pumped water into a tub using a hand pump, and walked over to the cabin and waited for the others to finish at the outhouse.

  When they finally gathered on the porch, Mario said to Sergei, "When you find yourself in a situation like this, if it's just guys, we can tough it out, but it's our obligation as men to tend to the women and children and make sure they're comfortable. So we need to first get a fire started in the fireplace, then we'll get some water heating on the wood stove, and after that, we'll see about cutting a Christmas tree, since tomorrow's Christmas."

  "For real?" Sergei said, excited. "We'll all be here for Christmas?"

  Mario nodded. "You'll also have some gifts waiting for you back at the ranch."

  "And the ones you gave me and Irina," Sergei said.

  "Those too," Mario replied. "Right now we have to get the fires going, then we'll take the saw from the mudroom and find a tree, and the women can figure out how to decorate it."

  Julia was moved by Mario's position on looking after women and children, no doubt a result of years as a marshal, but she didn't want him to think of her as the phobic, powerless, woman she was when he'd arrived because she was beyond that woman now, maybe not completely, but well on her way. "I can cut down a tree," she said, "I may have been a little obsessive-compulsive about not leaving my cabin when you first got here, but I'm past that now, and I'm not a helpless female."

  Mario laughed. "I figured that out when you were punching the devil out of your bag. And you're right. You are past what you were when I arrived. You're also in charge of sleeping arrangements, so let's go see what our options are."

  Once inside, Sergei went straight for the hand pump on the kitchen sink and started cranking it up and down, and Irina found a coloring book with an array of broken crayons on a coffee table and crouched on her knees and started coloring, while down a short hallway, Julia stood in the doorway of the only bedroom, staring at the double bed.

  Mario came up behind her, and looking over her head, he said, "You sleep here, the kids can sleep on the couch which makes up into a bed that's too short for me, and I'll make a pad and sleep on the floor in the living room."

  "That's silly," Julia said. "It's a big bed and you can sleep in here too. We'll be in our clothes in sleeping bags, so it's no different than if we were sleeping around a campfire, and that's a way to explain it to the kids."

  "That might explain it to the kids," Mario said, "but whenever I'm around you I need a cooling off, and you're not so vulnerable anymore."

  Turning around, Julia looked up at him, and said, "I suppose you're right, but you still need to come in after the kids are asleep to help pick out the gifts to put under the tree. I want to make this a family Christmas they'll always remember, with a decorated tree, and a Christmas meal that might not be traditional, but it will be on a table set for a special occasion, so I want to gather fir branches when we go for the tree. And I'll still sleep on one half of the bed, so if the floor gets hard during the night, you can come in."

  Mario brushed the back of his knuckles across Julia's cheek, and said, "Don't temp me. Meanwhile, I'll start moving firewood to keep my mind off other things."

  A half hour later, Sergei, under Mario's tutelage, had fires going in the fi
replace and the wood stove, and a large copper tub with water from the sink was heating on the stove. Meanwhile, Julia sat on the couch with Irina while drawing a picture of a Christmas tree with four stick figures to represent the four of them going out to cut the tree.

  Looking at the drawing, Irina signed, "Make the tree beautiful," and pointed to the tree.

  Julia nodded. After drawing a star and several circles with a crayon, she made her fingers into scissors, and signed, "We'll make paper ornaments to hang on it."

  Irina signed the word, angel, which Julia had shown her the day before, and pointed to the top of the tree.

  Julia nodded, and signed, "Yes, there will be an angel on top. Just like you." She opened her arms for Irina, who gave her an extended hug.

  As she was holding Irina, Julia looked beyond her and saw Mario staring at them. His look was troubled. She arched a brow and cocked her head slightly, her way of trying to ask if something was wrong, to which he shrugged, and said, "Time to go find a tree."

  They set out, the four of them following well trampled snow where the horses had been. Sergei and Irina went on ahead, while Julia and Mario followed a short distance behind. As they walked, Julia said to Mario in a quiet voice, "You looked worried when I was hugging Irina. Is something wrong?"

  "Yes, I was thinking about what lies ahead for these kids," Mario replied. "Irina's already attached to you, and when she has to go back, it's going to be rough on her."

  "Just as it will be rough on Sergei when you leave," Julia pointed out. "He idolizes you, wanting to do everything you do, so that must tell you something."

  "He's older. He can adjust," Mario said. "But Irina needs a mother. You could adopt these kids and give them a good home. I'd send money, like child support, to help out."

  "And in three years I'd have a teenage boy, who has no father, and he'd be angry because the man he idolized walked away from him, and a monthly check wouldn't fill that gap," Julia said.