Hawk

by Zoe Hart

  Behind me, Leslie cleared her throat. I turned to look at her. “Actually,” she murmured, “you do have a way to reach him.” She lifted up her phone so I could see it. In my scrub pocket, I could feel my phone vibrate. When I looked at the screen, I realized she’d shared his contact information with me. Technically, I had his phone number. Now all I needed to find was the courage I’d never had.

  9

  Hawk

  Saturday morning, I woke up on the couch of the lake house to Bishop licking my fingers. I didn’t dream it. I’d reclaimed my dog, but not my girl.

  Okay, so Taryn had never actually been my girl, but I would be lying if I didn’t admit that I’d long hoped once I returned, we could pick up where we left off. Or, even better, we could start over, start fresh together. After all, now I finally had something to offer her: a home. As soon as the sale was final, and the renovations were completed.

  In the meantime, I was going to start my job on Monday and take care of Bishop.

  The day before, I’d loaded him in the truck and moved us right into the lake house. My parents had a strictly enforced “no pets” rule. My mother claimed that she was allergic. I think she liked sounding sympathetic. The truth was probably that she hated animals. They made a mess and she liked her life to be immaculately clean. I grinned. This had given me the perfect excuse to stay in my favorite place. With luck, I’d be able to move into my house before the annual Fourth of July party my parents held at the lake house. And after a deep cleaning, they’d never know Bishop had been in residence.

  I checked the clock. If their Saturday routine hadn’t changed, they’d both be at the club. My mother would be playing tennis with friends while my father golfed with his. They’d shower and primp in their respective locker rooms, and then come together for dinner there as well. They wouldn’t be home until late. That meant I had plenty of time to go grab my things from the house.

  After taking Bishop outside to do his business, and carefully bagging it before dropping it in the trash can, I lured him into his kennel. “Come on, Bishop. I’ll let you run on the beach for as long as you want after I get back. Promise. I need to go get my clothes real quick.” He seemed unconvinced. And given the amount of time he’d probably spent in a kennel over the last three days, I couldn’t blame him.

  Finally, with the help of a treat I’d picked up at the pet store the night before, he was inside and carefully locked down. I drove to my parents’ place, hoping to rush in and out. I couldn’t have been more disappointed. My father was in the study when I arrived.

  “You didn’t come home last night,” he noted, without even greeting me, or looking me in the eye.

  “Nope. I’m going to stay at the lake house for a few weeks.” I realized my mistake. Telling him instead of asking permission was dangerous. Or at least it had been while I was in high school. “As long as that’s okay with you…”

  He leaned back in his chair and chuckled. “The Marines made you decisive. That’s good. We can use that at the office. You’ll report before 0900 on Monday?” He watched me carefully.

  I tried to give nothing away in my response. “Absolutely. That was the agreement, sir.” Throwing that at the end of every sentence during my time in the Corps had served me well. I was testing the usefulness of the word here.

  “Good. Then enjoy your time at the lake house.” He leaned forward and tugged at his chin. “What happens in a few weeks?”

  I cleared my throat. I hadn’t told him my plans. He hadn’t asked. And honestly, there was little time since I’d been home. “I bought my own house. It’s nothing big, a two-bedroom, two-bathroom cottage in a good neighborhood. I’m having it remodeled before I move in.”

  This time, his smile was huge. “You took the initiative to buy a house at your age?” He shook his head. “How did you manage that? You didn’t even ask for me to co-sign for a loan.”

  Leaning against the door frame, I had relaxed into the conversation. “Well, I’ve saved every penny I possibly could since I was fifteen. I invested money in the stock market. And I saved money on the place with a cash offer.” Actually, I was pretty proud of myself too. I didn’t mind bragging to my father a bit.

  “Nicely done, Hawk. I can’t wait to have you at the company starting Monday.” He paused and I noticed his phone had begun to vibrate. “It’s your mother. Probably hoping I’ll join her for lunch.” Then he waved me away and answered.

  Grateful for the chance to rush off, I made my way up the stairs to my room, taking them two at a time. My sea bag was still packed on the floor. I grabbed a suitcase from the closet and loaded all the clothes that would still fit me, since I’d added some muscle over the last five years, and then I slung the seabag over my shoulder and grabbed the suitcase.

  My father was still on the phone, so I made sure to mouth my “thank you” and “goodbye.” I didn’t need a reprimand. The next stop before the lake house was the grocery store. I didn’t want to waste money ordering in, or have to go through drive thrus. I wanted to spend the rest of the weekend at the lake house with my dog, trying not to think about Taryn.

  As soon as I put the groceries away, I let Bishop out of his kennel. He’d been watching me patiently. We were developing a new routine. He was so well trained; I knew he’d quickly adapt.

  “Ready for the beach, boy?” I opened the door, grabbed the leash, and hooked it to his collar before we stepped one foot off the deck.

  We made our way down the path to the sand. I toyed with going right, past more of the beach houses. Bishop sniffed the air and made it clear he had other ideas. “Dude, I really don’t want to go that way,” I muttered. If we turned to the left to walk down the beach, we’d soon pass the dunes. And I wasn’t sure I was ready to be assaulted by memories of my brief time with Taryn. That’s why I slept on the couch the night before instead of my bed.

  Bishop tugged on the leash. Apparently, what I wanted didn’t matter. We’d traveled all of a hundred feet when I realized there were people out near the dunes. Actually, a woman and her child. My heart raced. I blinked a few times, in case I was actually seeing things. Nope. Taryn was there with Lark.

  While Lark played on the sand a few feet away from her mother, Taryn was on the phone. “So, let me catch you up, Peyton.” She sighed. “I’m about to be homeless.”

  The phone was on speaker. Normally, this annoyed me, but for once, I was actually glad. I made Bishop stop so we didn’t interrupt, but I wasn’t above eavesdropping.

  “What do you mean? You have that cute little place. You’ve lived there for years.” Peyton’s voice grew shriller.

  “Well, apparently the new owner wants to live there.” Taryn’s laugh was hollow. “I don’t suppose you know a place that works with my budget. It’s happening too soon. I thought I had more time.” She sounded like she was about to cry.

  “I’ll think on it and let you know. Don’t worry.” Peyton growled. “If I hadn’t moved in with Cash, I’d have had room for you. I’m sorry. I would’ve loved living with you.”

  “Not as much as you love living with Cash. It’s okay. Plus, your old place was a one bedroom anyway. And that’s the same reason I can’t stay with Braxton or our parents.” She turned and saw me staring at her. “I…gotta let you go.”

  I felt like an asshole for smiling while she was in a bind, but discovering that Braxton was her brother made me ridiculously happy. “Sorry,” I murmured.

  “For what? Listening in?” She shook her head. “Someone’s always listening in on my conversations.” She nodded at her daughter.

  Lark suddenly stopped what she was doing and looked up. “Hawk!” My dog danced on his leash. “And Bishop.” She rushed over and hugged him before I could stop her.

  In my defense, I was still processing that Braxton and Taryn weren’t a couple. “Whoa. Careful. He’s not used to kids.” Even as I warned her, Bishop laid down on his belly to show he had manners. “Good dog.” I patted his head. Then I looked up at Taryn. “I’m s
o glad I ran into you.”

  Her cheeks flushed. “Why’s that?”

  I had to shoot my shot. “I’ve been thinking about you.” I smiled at her. “You have no idea how hard it was to leave without your number yesterday. I thought that you and Braxton…” I threw my hands up in the air.

  Taryn laughed. “He basically admitted he did that on purpose. He’s protective.” She gestured to encompass Lark.

  “Well, he seems like an awesome brother and uncle.” I glanced back toward where I’d come from. “I don’t suppose you want to go for a walk?”

  “Oh no. I took that walk before.” She shook her head. “This way. Let’s try something different.”

  I reached out and took her hand. She didn’t pull away. “Not completely different,” I commented.

  We’d been walking in silence for several minutes when I finally broke down. All these thoughts were swirling in my head. I wanted to swoop in and rescue her, if I could. Some of it was for purely selfish reasons, like I wanted more time with her. Some of it was because of the code. Once a Marine, always a Marine. We fiercely protected those we love.

  “So, about that conversation,” I began.

  “Yeah. That. Don’t worry about me. I mean…I’m like a cat. I always land on my feet.” She shrugged and smiled, but the smile never reached her eyes.

  “I’m staying at the lake house. You could too. You and Lark.”

  She froze. We stopped walking, which wasn’t working for Bishop and Lark.

  “Wait. Before you say no, here’s the thing…I’m sensing that her dad isn’t in the picture.” I waited.

  Her head hung. “He’s not.”

  “Well, I’m not trying to replace him. I’m just trying to help the two of you.” I brought her hand to my lips. “I meant it when I said I haven’t stopped thinking of you. All these years, I hoped we’d reconnect. Back then, I was leaving. I had nothing to offer you. Now, I do. I have the lake house. And if you don’t find a place, I have my house…once it’s ready.” Her head tilted and I could tell she was considering it. I pushed a little harder. “What do you think? Just for a little while, until you find something better.”

  “Are you going to make a habit of this?” she asked.

  “A habit of what?” I frowned.

  “Always saving me on a beach.” Taryn smiled.

  I grinned and picked her up. “So, that’s a ‘yes?’” I planted a lingering kiss on her forehead. “You won’t regret it. I promise.”

  “We’ll see. We should set some ground rules first…” She bit her lip nervously, and I once again found myself fighting the urge to kiss her, on the lips and for real.

  “I know things have changed for you,” I whispered, “but not for me. I haven’t been with anyone since you. And when I see you, I want to pick up where we left off. I understand that I have to be patient, but I’m not going to lie about where I stand or how I feel.” I blew out a breath. “That being said, I’m happy to negotiate some ground rules. What if we do it at the lake house where Bishop and Lark can be contained?”

  Taryn smiled. Her shoulders sagged. I wasn’t sure whether this was because of relief or resignation. “Okay. Let’s go talk at the lake house.”

  10

  Taryn

  Halfway back to the lake house, Lark started complaining that her feet hurt in true Lark style. “I’m dying. Just leave me here. I can’t walk another step.” She dramatically sank into the sand. She’d seen my mother do this on more than one occasion, usually when there was a bench she could land on while we were shopping. Of course, Lark had taken it to a whole new level.

  I started to speak. I was going to simply urge her to get up, but Hawk interceded. He stared down at her for a moment. “Oh, that’s too bad. I have ice cream at the house. I was going to share with you.”

  Oh, he was good. I watched Lark for a reaction. Slowly, she opened an eye and lifted her hand. “Maybe if you help me stand, I can make it.”

  He snickered. “Okay.” He held out a hand to her and hefted her off the sand before whispering in my ear. “Can I carry her? I don’t mind. I just didn’t want to step on toes…” His words, his tone, his actions…all sent shivers up and down my spine. If he wasn’t careful, he was going to have to carry me too.

  I didn’t trust myself around him. I’d already proven that where he was concerned, I had no restraint. Still, I looked up into his eyes and nodded. He smiled and scooped her up.

  “Is this better?” Hawk asked while he winked at me.

  “I suppose. Could I just have a piggyback ride instead?” She clasped her hands under her chin. “Mommy says I’m too big for her. I never get piggyback rides anymore.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Watch out. She’s a lurcher. One minute she’s safely attached, the next she stops holding on and pulls a Kate Winslet on the bow of the Titanic while I wrench my back trying to keep her from falling off.”

  “Good to know.” He chuckled.

  After she was settled on his back with her arms wrapped around Hawk’s neck, we quickly made our way to the lake house. I looked at the place differently now. That night, I barely paid attention to what it looked like. All my focus was on Hawk and the magic of our time together, the way he’d saved me from humiliation. Now, as I followed him up the deck steps, my focus was on the way he was bonding with the daughter he didn’t know he had. And I had to wonder if he’d be as kind to her if he knew the truth. I was determined to prevent the pain of rejection until I knew for certain how he’d react to the news.

  We entered the mud room, where we dropped our shoes before we hosed down our feet to remove any sand. Lark and I almost always wore flip-flops. Hawk offered a towel for us to dry off, and then we set up Lark in front of the television before sitting down in the kitchen to talk.

  This was such a normal thing to do—sit at a table together—and yet it felt so new, so nice. Practically everything was something we’d never done before. And I knew tonight, I’d really love my weekly routine of writing an email to Lark.

  “What would you like to drink?” Hawk asked, opening the fridge so I could see the contents.

  “Just water, please.” I could feel my heart racing. This really great guy was offering to open his home to us, but I was about to lay down some ground rules that might wreck the only viable option for us at the moment.

  He passed me a Dasani and pulled out the chair beside mine. “I can tell you’re nervous, Taryn. What’s bothering you?”

  I licked my lips. “I don’t want to sound like a jerk. I know the first night we met, I slept with you. I’m sure that makes it seem really strange that now all of a sudden I’m hitting the brakes.” I let out a hollow laugh. “What can I say? A child changes things.”

  Hawk smiled. “She should. And it’s fine. I’m great at following rules. The Marines trained me well.”

  He had a wonderful way of always knowing precisely what to say to make me feel better. I nodded. “Okay. So, here’s the thing. I can’t just hop into bed with you. Again.” I covered my eyes with one hand and felt my cheeks burn.

  Hawk reached out and gently tugged my hand away from my face, then held it in both of his. “Of course not.” He smiled. “We’re not stupid kids anymore. We can’t just fall into bed together. Not with Lark involved. I completely understand that.” He brushed my knuckles with his lips. “I’m not going to lie and tell you I don’t want that. I’m going to be honest and tell you that I want to get back there someday. But when I do, it’s not going to be for a night, it’s going to be because I want you forever. Understand?” He stared at me with those amazing blue eyes.

  All I could do was bite my lip and nod. In reply, he groaned.

  “You have no idea what you do to me with the lip bite. You make me want to kiss you, Taryn. Really, truly kiss you.”

  “I mean…I guess you could do that.” I leaned closer. “Although we have a nasty habit of not being able to stop.”

  “I’ll have you know that five years in the Marines has t
aught me a helluva lot of control. Go ahead. Test me.” Hawk winked.

  There were butterflies in my stomach, and we leaned toward each other. I was reconsidering, knowing that Lark was in the next room. She’d never seen me kiss anyone. I’d spent the last five years preparing for her arrival and struggling to provide for her. This kiss could change everything. If everything worked out with Hawk, I wouldn’t have to do this alone anymore. We could be a family, which was something I never imagined would be possible.

  Obviously, he decided he couldn’t wait. He reached behind my head and pulled me closer, until our lips touched. In an instant, I knew that all those feelings that had been lying dormant were once again fully awake. I could feel the heat of him, and soon, I tasted him. We stood up from our chairs at the same time and he crushed my body against his. My God, I wanted this man. Sure, part of it probably had to do with the fact that I hadn’t been with anyone since him. The other part, the bigger part…was that I had a thing for Hawk. I had since the first time we talked. The timing was lousy then. I hoped it would be better now.

  A small hand pulled on mine, causing me to jump and end the kiss. “Lark?” I tried to compose myself, but my heart was racing. Hawk hadn’t let go. I was still in his arms, one hand around my shoulder, the other resting on my hip. I turned. “What do you need, sweet pea?”

  “I have to go potty now.” She wiggled a little, just in case I doubted her.

  “Use the one off my room,” Hawk murmured. “Want me to show you where it is?”

  I nodded. It had been a really long time and I wasn’t sure I still knew my way around. “Thank you,” I added as we followed him through the kitchen and up the stairs toward his bedroom.

  His room, once we found it, was as I remembered it. His king-size bed was in the center of the interior wall. And the bathroom was inside the room, first door on the left. “I’ll wait for you here,” Hawk announced.