How to Forgive a Highlander (MacGregor Lairds)

by Michelle McLean

  “I’ll be fine, miss,” Rob said with a laugh. “I ken well enough how to keep hidden. And I promise I’ll not push myself too hard. I’ll be back with men and horses before ye’ve noticed I’m gone.”

  She nodded, then stood on tiptoe to press a kiss to his cheek. The lad flushed with pleasure, and Will had to resist the urge to yank Rose back to his side. She wasn’t his and he certainly had no right to act the part of a jealous husband. But it didn’t stop the feeling from gnawing at him.

  Rob nodded to him, and a twinge of guilt immediately pierced through the jealous haze. The lad was risking much to bring back help because Will was too weak to help himself. It might not sit well with him, but that was no excuse to take it out on Rob. Will limped forward and embraced him.

  “God go with ye, lad.”

  Rob nodded, his eyes bright. And then he gave them a little bow and limped out of the clearing.

  Rose clasped her hands together and held them against her mouth, watching until he’d disappeared into the brushes.

  “And now we wait,” she murmured.

  “Dinna fear for him, lass. He’s strong. Smart. He’ll be fine.”

  “That’s what I thought the last time, and he was nearly killed moments later.”

  Will chuckled. It was far easier to laugh at such a situation once the danger had passed. “There’s no sense in worrying o’er something we canna control. If the lad fails, we’ll know soon enough. Have a little faith.”

  She glanced up at him. “How do you think I’ve managed so far? Faith is all I have.”

  Will’s heart jumped. He brushed her hair from her face, his fingers lingering on her skin. “Not all, lass.”

  Her eyes grew wider at that, but she didn’t pull away. If anything, she drew closer. Her gaze shifted to his lips and her own parted slightly. If ever there was a lass made for kissing, it was this one. With all that fiery spirit in her, all that passion, he could drink her in and be sustained for the rest of his life.

  If he were smart, he’d run now. Haul his crippled body after Rob as fast as he could go and leave her far behind him. A headstrong English lass had no place in his world. No place with him, at least. He didn’t even know where his place was. At Kirkenroch? Glenlyon? He wasn’t needed in such places. Not really. The only time he’d felt useful was when he was with Ramsay’s men. And even there, he hadn’t been important. Not to them at least. But to his clan, aye, he’d been important. A spy risking his life to gain much-needed information, information that would turn the tides of the war they fought.

  And he’d failed. Miserably. He hadn’t discovered the information they’d so desperately needed. He’d ignited the spark that started the battle and led the enemy straight to his kin. It had been the lovely woman in his arms who had discovered the location of Ramsay’s men. She who had saved him when the enemy first attacked. She who had gotten the ladies of the manor to safety. She who had saved his life.

  He wasn’t worthy of her. He had no right to kiss her. To touch her at all. Yet still, he cupped her face, drawing his thumb across her lips.

  He couldn’t resist. His heart screamed out for her and once, just once, he wanted to bask in her light.

  “Do ye ken what I dreamed of when the fever had me?” he asked, his voice grown husky even to his own ears.

  She shook her head, a fine tremor running through her as he continued to caress her.

  “You.”

  She sucked in a breath, and he leaned down ever so slightly. “I dreamed of you. These eyes staring into mine. These hands touching me,” he said, interlacing his fingers with hers. “It was yer voice I heard, pulling me back from death. Telling me to get well. Nay,” he said with a deep chuckle, “commanding me to get well.”

  She smiled at that. “And you obeyed. I didn’t think you would.”

  “I didna think I would, either.”

  “You’re too stubborn.”

  “Aye, but no more so than you.”

  “Are we arguing over who is the most stubborn now?” she asked with a little laugh that sent sunshine blazing into his soul.

  “No. We’d be arguing until the sun went down.”

  She looked down at their intertwined fingers and brought them up to her face, rubbing her chin lightly across them. “Why did you listen?”

  He frowned slightly, not sure what she was asking.

  “Why did you come back to me? There were so many times…” Her breath hitched. His heart broke a little at the sound. “So many times, I didn’t think you would. I lay beside you at night so I could feel you breathing, even if I couldn’t see it in the dark. Sometimes you would falter, and I didn’t know whether you’d take another breath or not. I don’t think you wanted to. But you always did. Why?”

  His hands slid down to encircle her body and hold her close. “Part of me didna wish to return. It seemed…easier to float away. I was tired of the pain. Tired of the guilt. So…tired.”

  She frowned, her eyes searching his with tears in their depths.

  “But I think, even in my darkest moments, I could hear ye. Feel ye by my side. And I didna wish to leave ye. I ken I dinna deserve ye. But I wanted ye still.”

  Her mouth parted, and a tear tumbled down her cheek. “Will,” she breathed. Then she stood on her toes and pressed her lips to his. So softly he could barely feel more than her breath against his skin. Then again, she kissed him. Firmer. More insistent. And he couldn’t hold back anymore.

  He pulled her to him and angled his mouth over hers, claiming her lips until she opened to him, her tongue tangling with his in an erotic dance that had him swaying on his feet. They broke apart with a laugh, and he pressed his forehead to hers.

  “Perhaps we should go inside,” she said.

  “Aye. I’m perhaps not quite so steady on my feet as I’d hoped.”

  “Then we should get you to bed.”

  He blinked at her, surprised. He’d thought perhaps she’d turn shy as so many women were wont to do. But not his Rose. She took his hand in hers and led him inside, straight to his pallet.

  Then she sank down to her knees and lifted a hand for him to join her. He did, lowering himself carefully so as not to jostle his side overmuch. The minute he was seated, Rose climbed on his lap, her legs straddling his. She watched him carefully as if trying to gauge his reaction to her boldness. In answer, he wrapped one arm about her waist to draw her close and cupped the back of her neck so he could drag her lips back to his.

  He’d never been with a woman who was so forward, and her confidence as she touched him sent a flaming fire through his blood. Had there ever been a more perfect woman?

  Her hands tangled in his hair as they kissed and his hands explored the planes of her back, down to her waist and back up to grasp her shoulders. He twisted, thinking to roll her beneath him but broke off with a gasp and a curse as burning pain shot through his side.

  “Are you all right?” she asked, through kiss-swollen lips.

  “Aye.” He took a couple shallow breaths, waiting for the worst of the pain to subside. “I forgot I was wounded.”

  She laughed, the husky, passion-tinged sound reverberating through him. She pressed against him, her arms going back around his neck. “I suppose we’ll have to make do like this.” She rocked against him and leaned forward to capture his lips again.

  He groaned, his body burning as if his fever had returned. He needed her. Craved her. She was a dream made real, and if it was not but the fever playing tricks with his mind he wanted nothing more than to be consumed and to never wake again.

  Still, when her fingers went to her bodice and began to pull at her laces, he covered her hands with his.

  “Are ye sure, lass?”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Her eyes searched his and she smiled and leaned forward to press a devastating kiss to his lips. “Yes, I’m sure.”

  “Ye deserve a better place than this.” He looked around the cottage, and her heart clenched that he cared so much.

 
; She cupped his face, bringing his gaze back to her. “The place doesn’t matter. Only the person I’m with.”

  “And ye are aware who ye’re with?” he asked with a wry grin.

  Her laughter pealed out, and she kissed him again. “Yes,” she said, rocking against the hard length that was pressed between them. “I’m sure.” His hands tightened on her waist, and he groaned against her mouth.

  “Are you?” she asked.

  His deep chuckle sent waves of pleasure through her body, and this time he pulled her against him. “I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. I have been waiting my whole life for a woman as perfect as you. There is no one else I’ll ever want.”

  He kissed her until she whimpered under the onslaught of his lips.

  “I’m not perfect.” She kissed his neck. “Not even close.” She nibbled at his ear and he pulled at the neckline of her bodice to kiss a path along her collarbone.

  “We’ll have to agree to disagree.” His teeth lightly scraped the delicate skin behind her ear and she grabbed at his shirt, carefully pulling it over his head and then tossing it to the side.

  “We can’t stand each other, remember,” she said, running her hands down his chest, though she took care to stay away from his wounded side.

  “Aye. Ye’re stubborn. And opinionated. And ye talk too much.”

  She gasped, not sure if it was in outrage or pleasure. He dragged her against his thigh again and a moan escaped her lips. Pleasure. Definitely pleasure. She’d be outraged later.

  “But ye’re still perfect. And I’m the luckiest man in the world,” he said as his hands slid up her thighs and pulled her as close to him as she could get before returning to her bodice. “You, however,” he kissed her again, his fingers making quick work of her bodice laces, “could do much better.”

  That startled a laugh out of her that was immediately choked off when his lips closed around her breast.

  “Oh,” she said, though the sound was more of a choked breath than a word. “I think you underestimate yourself.”

  He chuckled again and took her hand, pressing it to the hard length beneath his kilt. “Och, there’s nothing underestimated about me, lass.”

  Her hands closed around him, and his head dropped back, his breath hissing from his lips. She released him long enough to remove his belt and unwind his kilt, leaving him bare to her gaze. She’d seen him before, of course, as she’d tended to him when he lay dying. But this was different. So very different.

  She stood and pulled off the rest of her bodice and skirt. He looked up at her like he was seeing the sun for the first time. Then he reached for her.

  “Lie beside me, lass.”

  She sank down next to him as he carefully rolled to his side. She hitched her leg over his hip, taking care not to brush against his wound. And when he finally entered her, he gasped at the twinge of pain as much as she did.

  “Did I hurt ye, lass?” he asked.

  “Not much. Did I hurt you?”

  “Not much.” He chuckled and she gasped again, though not from pain. “We’ll have to take this slow, aye?”

  She nodded, wanting to touch him everywhere but afraid to at the same time. He grasped her hip, guiding her as they slowly rocked together. The discomfort melted away as they moved, building into something more wonderful than she’d ever dreamed existed.

  She grabbed his hip, her fingers digging into his flesh, and he answered her unspoken demand. Some small part of her remembered his wound, worried for it. But the intensity building in her wiped all other thoughts from her mind. There was nothing but him. Moving with her. Through her. Branding himself on her forever.

  She’d never be the same again. Even if she walked out of that room and never saw him again, he’d be a part of her soul until the day she died. She’d always been so sure of herself and what she wanted. And with a final stroke, he shattered everything she thought she knew. Her world was gone and a new one, more incredible than anything she’d ever dreamed, was in its place.

  He was only a moment behind her and then they held each other, shuddering and gasping for breath.

  She finally regained enough presence of mind to remember his side. “Are you hurt? You aren’t bleeding again, are you?”

  Will laughed and pulled her close for a kiss. “My sweet Rose. I dinna care if I bleed to death right here in this bed. I’d die a happy man.”

  “Well, I’d care very much.” She tried to untangle herself from him, but he held her tight.

  “Let it bide, lass. I’m fine. I’ll be sore later, for certain. But it was well worth it.”

  She settled back into his arms, content to believe him. She’d be sure to check his bandages later. But now, she wanted nothing more than to wrap herself around him.

  They spent the rest of the day laughing, talking, eating, and exploring all the ways they could enjoy each other. They were both too sore to fully make love again. But Will showed her there was more than one way to find pleasure in each other.

  When night fell, they cuddled up together, both lost in their thoughts.

  Rob would return, if not the next day then probably the day after. And they would have to return to the world outside their little cottage. A few weeks ago, even a few days ago, there had been nothing that Rose wanted more. Now, she wished they could go on together, just the two of them.

  “What are ye thinking about so hard over there?” he asked, pulling her back against his chest.

  She sighed happily. “About how much things have changed. And how much they’ll change once we go back.”

  “Why must things change?” he asked, his forehead creasing in a frown.

  “Well, they must, mustn’t they? Here we’ve been kind of sheltered from the world. Once we return, we both have responsibilities and obligations…”

  He shifted to his back and gazed up at the roof. “I havena given much thought to what will happen when we return. I didna think I’d return at all. Until ye found me and nagged me into living.”

  She lightly slapped the uninjured part of his chest and he chuckled, taking her hand and bringing it up to his mouth for a kiss.

  “Will you stay on at Kirkenroch?” she asked.

  “I dinna ken. I lived at Glenlyon before going to England. Then I was with my laird John. Did ye ken he was the Highland Highwayman?”

  “I did. But only because Lady Alice likes a bit of gossip, and there was no one else she could trust that bit of information to.”

  “She shouldna have told anyone. Of course, she must have discovered it from Lady Elizabet. Do lassies do nothing but gossip about that which they shouldna?”

  “Oh, and you’re one to talk. I’ve heard the things men say around their campfires. Women aren’t nearly so bad.”

  He snorted. “We’ll have to agree to a differing of opinions on that, lass.”

  “What did you do after being a highwayman?” she asked, steering the conversation back to the relevant matter at hand.

  “When John was exiled and his lady ran away with him, I stayed behind and befriended a man in Ramsay’s employ. He introduced me to Ramsay and I’ve been with him ever since. Watching and waiting. Being the eyes and ears for my laird.”

  “And now that Ramsay’s gone?”

  He sighed deeply. “I dinna ken. I could go back to Glenlyon. There’s always work to be done at the castle. Or most likely I’ll stay at Kirkenroch and help them rebuild. John will be in need of good men, and I have been his man since I could swing a sword.”

  “You’ll stay in Scotland then.” Rose rested her cheek against his chest, fighting against the sadness settling in her heart. Will hadn’t said anything that surprised her. And yet, she had hoped perhaps he might want to return to England. A foolish hope.

  “Aye. Will ye no’ be staying then?” he asked. “I thought ye’d want to stay with the Lady Alice.”

  “Of course, I do. But I assumed she’d want to return home. At least at some point. I know that she and Philip…well, I
’m not sure what is between them, to be truthful. There was no time to discuss anything after we arrived. But her family is in England. They must be worried for her. And you have to admit, her experiences in Scotland have not been…ideal.”

  He frowned. “Perhaps not, but that doesna mean she’ll wish to abandon her husband and return to her family.”

  “You are assuming she considers him her husband.”

  “Why would she not?”

  “The way they were married is not a custom that is recognized in England. Her family certainly won’t consider her wed, though they may pretend for decency’s sake. I’m certain they’ll want her to return to them. And if she wishes to go, I must go with her.”

  “And if she doesna wish to go? If she wishes to stay in Scotland?”

  Rose frowned. “I don’t know. I’ve never considered staying. Of course, my place is with Lady Alice. But…I have family in England as well. I…I don’t know. I’ve always been certain Lady Alice would return home. And even if she stays, she’ll go where Philip goes. What if he doesn’t wish to remain at Kirkenroch? Or even Glenlyon? He might have his own place somewhere else.”

  Will didn’t say anything to that, merely tightened his arms about her and held her close. And Rose didn’t say anything else, either. She didn’t want to disturb their happy bubble. Because no matter what Will said, Rose didn’t see a future in Scotland. She belonged with her lady. And they both belonged back home in England.

  Even if her heart yearned to belong to Will.

  …

  They lay in each other’s arms, watching the sun rise through the small hole in the cottage’s roof. Will brushed Rose’s hair off her forehead and pressed a kiss to her brow.

  She snuggled in to his chest. “Part of me hoped morning wouldn’t come.”

  He took a deep breath. “It doesna have to be only one night, ye ken.”

  She sighed. “Will,” she said, pressing a kiss to his chest before sitting up. “Nothing has changed since last night. I’m still going back to England with my mistress.”

  “If she’s going. We dinna ken what’s transpired between her and my cousin. They are married.”