A Storm of Glass and Stars (The Oncoming Storm Book 4)

by Marion Blackwood

  At long last, Princess Illeasia drew back slightly. A small sigh bordering on a moan escaped her lips as she leaned against Elaran’s chest.

  “That’s what I wanted to tell you,” she said.

  Since Elaran had his back to us, I couldn’t see the expression on his face but I figured he had to be pretty surprised as well. The wood elf let his hand drift from the back of her neck and down her arm. He must’ve been about to speak because the princess placed a finger over his lips.

  “Before you say anything, I just need to know.” She sucked in a shuddering breath. “Are you glad I told you?”

  Placing a hand over hers, Elaran removed her finger from his lips. “Yes.”

  The nervous princess closed her eyes and let out a long sigh of relief. When she had opened them again, she drew him close and placed a kiss on his strong jaw.

  “I have to go,” she whispered in his ear.

  Before Elaran had time to answer, she pulled back and escaped through the door in a swishing of silver skirts. The auburn-haired archer remained staring at the now closed door she had left by only seconds before. I blinked at the scene. What in the world had I just witnessed?

  Shade put his hands on my waist. “As enjoyable as this position is, maybe we should rejoin our stunned friend?”

  Trying to ignore the crackles that had shot through me when he placed his hands there, I shook my head to clear it of all the strange things that had happened these past few minutes. I pushed open the closet door and jumped out. Shade landed in the space I had just vacated while I made my way towards Elaran.

  After skirting around his unmoving body, I frowned up at him. “You alright?”

  He jerked back as if he’d been woken from a deep trance and blinked at me. “I...” Shaking his head violently, he strode to the bed and collapsed on it. With a hurricane of emotions whirling around in his eyes, he leaned forward and buried his face in his hands.

  “What the hell is going on?” I demanded and threw out my arms. “Are you okay or what?”

  Shade had resumed his previous seat and leaned back in the white chair. His face was filled with understanding as he watched the distraught wood elf. When Elaran finally looked up, the assassin held his gaze steady and gave him a lopsided smile.

  “You’re in love,” he stated.

  Pain, hope, and confusion drifted past on the elf’s face. I stared at him. Elaran was in love? Was that even possible? I had always thought he was like Shade. A person who didn’t fall in love. Someone who had a long list of important things to accomplish in life and no time for something as silly as feelings.

  The ranger drew his fingers through his hair and heaved a sigh so deep I thought it would never end. “Yeah. Yeah, I think I am. But it doesn’t matter.”

  “What do you mean it doesn’t matter?” The assaulted cover sent a poof of air into my face as I dropped down on the bed next to Elaran. “Are you in love or not?”

  “Yes, I’m in love,” he snapped, the agony on his face so sharp it almost drew blood. “But it doesn’t matter because I can’t be. Not with her. My first duty is to protect my people and she’s the princess of the nation threatening to eventually conquer my home. Whatever I feel is irrelevant. Duty comes first.”

  Loyalty, honor, duty. His cornerstones. My already battered heart bled for him even though I only partly understood his dilemma. I felt no particular loyalty to any city so sacrificing my own needs for the good of a country was as foreign to me as bowing to authority. But on the other hand, there was nothing I wouldn’t do for the people I loved. Maybe it was the same concept. Only, his circle was a lot bigger than mine.

  When Elaran noticed sympathetic looks on both our faces, he crossed his arms and drew his eyebrows down. His half-hearted attempt at a scowl fell flat due to the searing agony in his eyes but I pretended not to notice because I knew that if it had been me, I would’ve hated the sympathy too.

  “This changes nothing,” Elaran said. “We escape tomorrow as planned.”

  Shade studied him. “Are you sure?”

  “Yes, I’m sure. Now get out.” He flicked his hands at the door. “We all need to sleep because it might be a while before get the chance again. We’ll do a final check in at dinner tomorrow.”

  The Master Assassin and I exchanged a glance. After unfurling my legs, I did as the elf told me and made for the door. I understood the desire to be alone when in pain and he was also right about needing sleep. If we were escaping tomorrow night, there wouldn’t be much time to rest.

  A soft click sounded as Shade relocked the door behind us. His intense black eyes met mine.

  “One more day.”

  I gave him a slow nod. “One more day.”

  For a moment, it looked like he was about to say something else but then he just turned on his heel and strode back towards his room. After lifting my shoulders in a shrug, I did the same.

  By this time tomorrow, it would all be over. No more dancing and formal dinners. No more conflicted feelings about getting rid of the darkness. I cast a quick glance over my shoulder at the closed door, behind which I knew a torn elf paced restlessly. No more laughter and smiles from Elaran. My head and my heart were both hopelessly tangled up as I reached my room. For better or worse, it would all end tomorrow.

  23.

  Jasmine and roses filled the evening air. I traced my fingers over a gorgeous white flower as Niadhir and I strolled along the terrace while waiting for the banquet to start. When we reached a secluded corner, the scholar steered us towards a white bench. Once we were seated, he placed a hand over mine and turned to me with serious eyes.

  “Have you thought about what you want?”

  The unexpected question sent a flare of panic through me. My whole soul screamed, I don’t know! However, instead of voicing that, I cleared my throat and tried to make my voice light.

  “About what?”

  Concerned violet eyes searched my face. “Freeing yourself from your demonic curse.”

  “Oh.” I traced circles in the white fabric covering my thigh. “I don’t know.”

  “Explain.”

  I frowned at him. “Explain what?”

  “If you explain your reasoning behind each possible outcome, maybe I can help you come to a decision. What is it that makes you hesitate?”

  A cool night wind swept through the jasmine bush in front of us. Listening to the soft rustling of leaves, I tried to put my scattered thoughts together.

  “Well, I guess it’s because it’s part of me,” I finally said. “One of the few parts of me that’s still here.”

  “What do you mean?”

  Normally, I wasn’t one for sharing personal details but I needed to talk this through with someone who had a different perspective on things. For me. Even though I wouldn’t get the chance to actually get rid of the darkness because we were escaping tonight, I wanted to discuss it. Or perhaps because of that. I needed to convince myself that I was making the right choice, because afterwards there would be no going back.

  “It’s just, I don’t know who I am anymore.” I let out a humorless laugh. “My whole life, my identity has always been based on who I am to someone else. A sister. A friend. A protector. But they don’t really need me anymore. Everyone has their own life. Except for me. And I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing when I’m not living for someone else.”

  Niadhir looked down at me with even more concern swirling in his eyes. “That does not sound very healthy. You need to have a purpose in life. What do you want?”

  “I don’t know!” I snapped. At the startled expression on his face, I put a hand to my brow and massaged my forehead. “I’m sorry. It’s just... that question. I don’t have an answer to it.”

  He gave me a patient smile. “I understand. But what does this have to do with your curse?”

  “Well, the darkness at least makes me feel like I have some sort of identity.”

  “Even if it is a toxic one?”

  Blowing out a
sigh, I leaned back on the bench. “I guess so.”

  The patient scholar gave my arm a light squeeze. “I understand. It is normal to cling to bad habits when faced with change. Change is difficult and old habits bring comfort in times of upheaval but the important thing is to have enough willpower to break free and courage to transform into something new. Something better.”

  “But the darkness isn’t all bad,” I said, desperately trying to throw up a flimsy shield to guard against his logic. “Shade pointed out that it has saved my life and also helped me save other people too. More than once. He said the darkness is an asset too. And I think he’s right.”

  “Your friend Shade said this?” Niadhir pressed his mouth together in a disapproving line. “I must say, if he is supposed to be your friend, I am very disappointed in him. He knows that almost all Storm Casters die by their own hand and often kill their loved ones too, and he still encourages you to keep your curse. What kind of person would wish that upon anyone?” He shook his head. “If he truly was your friend, would he not want what was best for you? It sounds more like he wants you to keep it so that he can benefit from your power before it kills you.”

  Not sure what to say, I averted my eyes and went back to tracing figures on my dress.

  “Do not worry,” Niadhir went on. “I will never rush you. As I mentioned, this is a big decision. But I am afraid for you. I am afraid that you will be far past the point of no return and get yourself seriously hurt before you arrive at a decision. Please, do be careful.” His mouth drew into a small smile. “I do not know what I would do if something happened to you.”

  Thankfully, my chance to reply was cut short by a voice from the glass doors announcing that the banquet was ready. All around us, well-dressed couples in white and silver rose and started weaving through the potted bushes in the direction of the banquet hall. Tipping my head up, I studied the glittering stars above for a moment.

  As much I wanted to deny it, Niadhir had some pretty convincing arguments. Unfortunately, they were arguments for the wrong side. I had decided to discuss the matter honestly because I had wanted to be sure that I was doing the right thing leaving Starhaven without getting rid of the darkness but my conversation with the scholar had done the exact opposite. Now, I was even more uncertain whether I was making the right decision.

  Tilting my head back down, I found my companion waiting for me with his arm offered. I blew out a deep sigh and took it. Persistent words jabbed into my mind as we made our way from the terrace and then through the banquet hall. What do you want? The question left a trail of echoes in its wake. I shoved it out. Getting distracted was dangerous and we couldn’t afford mistakes right now. It was time to get to work.

  A clatter rang out as I bumped into the table we were rounding, sending plates and utensils rattling against each other.

  “Oh, by the Stars,” Niadhir exclaimed. “Are you alright?”

  Bending over the table, I righted the toppled glasses while a look of embarrassment flashed past on my face. “Yeah, uhm sorry, I wasn’t paying attention. My mind was somewhere else.”

  “Ah, yes,” the scholar said, “a preoccupied mind often makes one clumsy.”

  Clumsy? I was a cat burglar. And a damn good one at that. I never bumped into tables, sending silverware flying everywhere. Unless I wanted to, of course.

  It took great effort to stop a satisfied grin from spreading across my face as I felt the knives I’d stolen disappear into my dress. Servants were already hurrying over to the table I’d ruined on purpose and in a few moments, it would all be returned to normal. No one would know that a thief had just lifted two deadly weapons from their banquet table.

  “Ah, Captain Hadraeth,” Niadhir said as we reached our seats. “How are you this evening?”

  The Guard Captain was glowering at something further away but at the scholar’s question, he tore his gaze from it. “Fine, thank you.”

  A moment later, Elaran and Princess Illeasia appeared from the crowd. The princess in her sparkling dress was so absorbed in her discussion with the wood elf that she didn’t notice the rest of us until they had already arrived at the table. Surprise flashed past in her pale violet eyes when she found the three of us watching her.

  “Oh, please forgive me!” Her embarrassed laughter bounced off the crystal and silver decorations around us. “I was somewhere else.”

  While Illeasia was busy apologizing for her distractedness and greeting her friends, another couple swaggered out of the mass of chatting star elves.

  “Nely,” Princess Illeasia said. “You look lovely as always. How was your day?”

  The gorgeous lady ran a hand over the jewels gleaming above her cleavage. “Oh, it was wonderful. Shade showed me his sword fighting skills by sparring with a guard.”

  There was a slight pause as the Master Assassin looked to me and then Elaran with intense eyes. “Yes, a most productive day indeed.”

  It was on. He had succeeded in obtaining a set of armor for Elaran. My heart pattered in my chest. We were escaping tonight.

  “He was excellent,” Lady Nelyssae continued, completely oblivious to the secret message that had passed between us. She turned to Captain Hadraeth and gave him a hopeful smile. “Though not as good as you, of course. No one ever is. I would love to watch you spar some time.”

  Hadraeth scrunched up his eyebrows in a confused frown. “The sparring ground is no place for a lady of the court.”

  “No, of course not,” Nelyssae amended. “I only meant...”

  She trailed off and was spared further awkwardness by the arrival of Queen Nimlithil. The domed hall fell silent as the queen glided through the starlight spilling in from the glass ceiling and took up position by the high table. White gems rivalling the stars in beauty sparkled as she turned around.

  “Welcome, my friends,” the graceful queen said. “The stars have blessed us with another beautiful evening. Let us enjoy it.” Glittering bracelets clinked as she swept out her arms. “Please be seated.”

  Excited murmuring resumed as the lords and ladies did as their queen bid and seated themselves on the cushioned chairs. Within a minute of the scraping furniture falling silent, servants in white appeared from the hidden doors with large silver trays in their hands. Wonderful aromas drifted up from the small plate filled with salad and fried cheese that was placed before me. I folded my hands in my lap without touching it.

  By now, I had attended enough of these formal dinners to know that I should be waiting for everyone to receive their food before eating and which fork I should use when doing so. Knowing the rules didn’t make them any less annoying, though. I hated being bound by social constraints in this way.

  “Have you given any more thought to getting rid of your curse?” Lady Nelyssae called across the white tablecloth.

  I blinked at her in surprise.

  “Nely!” Princess Illeasia exclaimed.

  “What?” The confused lady pushed her full lips into a pout. “It’s why Queen Nimlithil brought her here in the first place. Everyone knows it.” Her pale violet eyes turned back to me. “What I don’t understand is why you haven’t done it yet. Who would want to live with a demonic curse?”

  Next to her, Shade’s black eyes studied me intently before they shifted to his table companion. “It’s not a curse. It’s an asset.”

  “Forgive me,” Niadhir interrupted. “I was going to remind you that this is a very personal decision for Storm, and one that we should not be discussing over dinner, but after your comment I simply cannot refrain from responding.” The scholar met the assassin’s gaze with a disapproving stare. “How can you say something like that and still call yourself her friend? You know full well that the curse will get her killed.”

  “It might not,” I cut in before the Master Assassin could reply. I had no idea why white-hot fire suddenly burned behind his eyes, but I decided it was best not to find out. “Just because it happened to a lot of others doesn’t mean it will happen to me.”
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  The words rang false even to my ears but I didn’t want Shade to do something rash that would screw up our escape plans so I had to say something to defuse the situation.

  Niadhir whirled towards me, concern and outrage evident on his face. “What has it brought you before? Only death. How many people have you killed while lost in the darkness? How many friends have almost died because you could not control the curse?” He flicked a hand to Shade. “You almost killed him a few weeks ago. Then there was also that other friend who almost died in an ambush in Pernula when you failed to control it. How many others?”

  Shade’s face had become an unreadable mask but Elaran, who was much less adept at hiding things, whipped around and stared at me. I knew what they were thinking because the same thought spun in my mind. How in Nemanan’s name did Niadhir know about that? I couldn’t remember telling him about my fight with Shade in Travelers’ Rest. Or about that time when Zaina had ambushed us when we first arrived in Pernula and she had almost slit Haemir’s throat and shot the rest of them full of crossbow bolts because I attacked when the darkness ripped from my soul.

  The most disconcerting part of all, however, was that he was right. I had brought death’s cold breath to my friends’ lives more than once. Not only the two occasions Niadhir knew about but also to Liam and Elaran. When we assassinated King Adrian, Liam had almost died and I had done nothing to save him because I had lost myself in the darkness and gone on a killing spree. Instead, Elaran had been the one to save him. He had sacrificed part of his own life to do it. If I hadn’t been absorbed by darkness, maybe he wouldn’t have had to.

  “You know what, you’re right,” I said and blew out an irritated breath. “This is a personal decision. So how about we talk about something else?”