by K. G. Reuss
“Miss Bishop, fantastic job. You can leave,” Dennison called out. “The rest of you, I need more heart in this.”
His words faded as I gathered my bag and started to leave. Dread filled my belly as I knew where I’d be going in just a few short minutes. Ian’s house to make good on another promise.
“Rosie, hey, wait up,” Fox called out, trotting to catch up to me.
Sighing, I turned to face him. “I’m tired, Fox. I’m having a really shitty evening. If you aren’t going to improve it, then leave me alone.”
“Are you talking to Ethan?”
I frowned and stared up at him. “No. I’m talking to you. Are you drunk? High?”
He rolled his brilliant blue eyes. “You know what I mean. I saw him leaving your place in the middle of the night.”
“Are you spying on me now?”
“To be fair, Rosie, I’m always watching. But Ethan? What’s going on? You forgive him but not us?”
“To be fair, Fox, Ethan isn’t an asshole like you and the other two are. I’ve seen the notebook. Remember?”
“I told you to not try to break us apart.”
“And I’m not.” I crossed my arms over my chest.
“So you and Ethan aren’t talking again? Why was he at your house in the dead of night?”
“Why the fuck do you care?”
“Because. Ethan is my friend, and we do this together or not at all. He’s been avoiding us. He’s really fucking up what I’m trying to fix, Rosalie. Juliet—”
“Oh, fuck her and fuck you, Fox,” I snapped at him. “If I want to fuck Ethan, I will.”
“So you’re cheating on Ian with Ethan?” He let out a bitter laugh.
Anger took up residence in my body, and I spoke without thinking. “No, I’m cheating on Ian with Enzo. I fucked him days ago. Alone. Or didn’t he tell you?”
Fox’s face paled. “What?”
“That’s right. I bet if it comes down to it, your boys are really my boys. Loyalty runs pussy deep, Fox. You should know that since you let it decide your loyalty.”
A squeak of air left me as Fox lunged, his hand around my throat. His eyes were filled with hurricanes, as he shoved me against the wall in a dark corner.
“Don’t fucking play this game with me, Rosie. I’m fucking sick of playing. Do you have any idea what it’s like to watch Ian touch you? Kiss you? To know that he’s controlling you? Fucking hurting you? And then you take that pain and turn it back on me? Me, Rosalie? After all I’ve done for you—” He lessened his hold on me, his eyes shining.
“Bullied me. Cheated on me. Broke my heart?” I rasped softly. “Those things you’ve done for me? And yeah I have some idea what it’s like to watch all those things. I have to watch you with her.”
His eyes wavered as his bottom lip trembled. “I hate this musical. I’m here for you. I hate Juliet. I’m buried inside her at night for you. I fucking hate that you’re hurting, but I’m here, Rosalie, even if I am a fuck up. I’m. Still. Here. Don’t fuck with what’s mine. Don’t tear apart everything that makes me who I am.” He dropped his hand from my throat.
I approached him and rested my hand on his chest. His heart beat hard and fast beneath my touch. I went up on my tip toes. He immediately inclined his head for me as I whispered in his ear.
“Maybe we should end this now. I get Ethan. You get Juliet. And Enzo and Cole can decide for themselves who they really want to fuck. Me… or you.” I trailed my lips down his jaw as he shook against me before I pressed a tender kiss to the edge of his lips and pulled completely away.
He didn’t move. He didn’t speak. He only stared at me.
“I’ll see you around. Tell Enzo I said hi.” I backed away, my heart hammering so hard it was all I could hear. I wasn’t sure if he’d lunge again, so when I spun around to leave, it took all I had to keep my head high.
I knew my words hurt him. Enzo had betrayed him. Ethan was betraying him. And he was losing me. Or maybe I was already gone because as I walked away, my heart was with Ethan, not Fox. I had to save Ethan. Fox could save himself.
The damage was done, and maybe we couldn’t come back from it. After all, war often laid claim to those we loved the most.
And I loved Fox.
Twenty-Two
“You’re late.” Ian shoved me into his room, his mouth turned into a deep frown.
I didn’t deny it. After leaving rehearsals, I’d driven around, feeling sick to my stomach. Truth of the matter, I was tired of playing these games. Even though Ethan and I had just become an us, I knew I’d pick him over Ian any day, and continuing this bullshit was only making me feel crazier.
“Sorry. Rehearsal ran late,” I muttered, rubbing my eyes.
He grunted and motioned for me to sit on his bed. “That’s all?”
“What else would there be?”
“Evans or any number of the guys you were fucking.”
I closed my eyes for a moment to collect myself before I answered. “I’m not a slut, Ian, and even if I was, that’s not bad news for you.”
He cocked his head at me and smirked.
What the hell. He hardly ever smiles.
“It is bad news for me because if you’re a slut like everyone says, you’re holding out on me, Rosalie. What’s up with that?”
“I’m not holding out, Ian.” I chewed my bottom lip, not sure how to navigate my lie. “I just was hurt. I don’t want it to happen again.”
“I get it, but this entire thing is a little on the side of suck for me. You give incredible head, sure, but I’d like to experience your pussy.”
I needed to change the subject. “Ian, what’s going to happen when we graduate? Are we going to go our separate ways? Do you just let me go?”
He frowned. “I want you to be with me.”
“Forever?”
He nodded, his eyes locked on mine. “That’s the plan.”
“But Ian…” I licked my lips. “Once I’m out of high school and in college on my own, I won’t give a shit about any of this. You could send autographed copies to my parents, and I wouldn’t care. We’re on borrowed time. This is temporary.” The moment the words were out of my mouth, I regretted them, worried he’d lose his shit on me again.
I was surprised when he let out a sigh and took my hand in his.
“I was really hoping you’d like me enough to stick around.”
“You hurt me,” I whispered. “It would be like Stockholm. When I love someone, it’s because we care about one another and I have free will. I’m a prisoner in this relationship.”
“Then don’t be, Rosalie. Fucking let go of all the shit and be with me. Really be with me. Stop focusing on using me for revenge. Let me in a little.” He got to his feet and went to his desk. He pulled out a small thumb drive and held it up to me. My name was on a sticker on the front.
“This is everything I have on you. Right here. No backup. Just this one piece of fucking plastic. Try with me and it’s yours. I’ll drop everything if you try. I’ll give this to you. It’s your freedom. Do you want it?”
“Yes,” I whispered, eyeing the small black drive in his hand.
“Then kiss me. Fuck me. Date me. I won’t hurt you.”
“You already have.” I chanced a glance at him.
He closed his eyes and let out a slow breath before he stared back at me. “I fucked up. The truth of the matter is, I really fucking like you. These feelings I have for you make me insane. I can’t even think about another girl when I have you in front of me. I’d like to be normal and fall in love the way it’s meant to be, but it looks like that’s not in the cards for me. Or you, it would seem. So why not just fucking do this and try to make the best of it? Maybe if we try and you still hate me by graduation, we call it good. At least I won’t wonder.”
“OK.” The only thing I could think of was getting that damn device in his drawer then graduation wouldn’t matter if he was telling the truth about it being the only thing he had on me. I decided t
o try my luck. “You swear that’s the only spot you have my stuff?”
“Yes.”
“And if at the end of this I don’t feel anything, you give it to me and let me go?”
He moved to me and eyed me, hunger burning in the depths of his eyes. “Yes. I promise.”
“Fine. I agree.” Disgust washed over me, but a girl had to do what a girl had to do.
“Good,” he murmured, leaning in and pressing his lips to mine. “Now, I want to meet your parents.”
“Right now?” I lifted a brow at him as he pulled away.
“No time like the present. Besides, my dad gets out tomorrow, and I want you to come with me. I need you on this.”
The last thing I wanted to do was meet the guy who’d killed Fox’s mom, but I gave Ian the smile he sought and nodded. “Fine. I’ll call my parents and let them know you’re coming.”
Ian smiled and backed away from me. Blowing out a breath, I dialed home and waited until Mom came on the line.
“Honey? Are you going to be late? I just made pot roast—” She didn’t even bother saying hi, since I’d been late coming home the last few nights with my lies of studying and working on the yearbook, which I wasn’t even a part of.
“Uh, no. Not really. I was wondering if I could bring a friend to dinner.” I fiddled with a string on my shirt.
“Jamie? You know we love Jamie—”
“No, it’s not her. Uh, we still aren’t talking. It’s someone else. H-his name is Ian. He’s my boyfriend.”
“Boyfriend?” Surprise colored Mom’s tone. “I had no idea you were seeing someone. Of course. Bring him. We’d love to meet him.”
“Thanks, Mom. See you soon.” I hung up the phone and looked to Ian. “She said OK.”
“Great,” Ian muttered. “Let’s go.”
“What about your brother? No one will be here—”
“Andy is fine. He’s nine. He knows how to handle his shit. His friend lives down the street if he needs anything.” Ian held his hand out to me, and I took it, allowing him to pull me to my feet. We left his room and went to the front door.
“Andy, I’m leaving. Don’t burn this shit hole down while I’m gone,” Ian called out.
“Whatever. Bye, Rosalie.” Andy waved to me.
I’d never know he was related to Ian. He was his polar opposite, or so it seemed.
“Bye, Andy. Be good, OK?”
“You know it.” Andy turned away and went back to this video game as we left the house.
“Little asshole likes you more than me,” Ian muttered, turning to plant a kiss on my lips at my car. “I’ll follow you there.”
“Great.” I pulled away and peeked up at him.
He lifted a dark brow at me. “What?
“My parents don’t know I’m in the musical. Can you not say anything?”
“Of course.” He backed away and offered me a smile. “You can trust me.” He turned and went to his car as I slid into mine.
The last thing I could do was trust him. But it was really all I could do at this point. I said a little prayer, just in case, though.
Twenty-Three
“Ian, would you like more roast?” Mom asked as she lifted her tongs.
“No, thank you Mrs. Bishop. I’ve had plenty,” Ian said. “It’s delicious, by the way. My mom doesn’t cook, so this has been a real treat.”
“Aw, I’m glad you like it. I’ll send some leftovers home for you.” Mom beamed at Ian who grinned back.
I wanted to roll my eyes at the exchange. He played nice but was a real snake.
“So, Ian. What are you planning on doing after high school?” Dad placed his glass on the table and lifted his fork. “Any colleges you’re looking at?”
“Not really. The rising cost of colleges is ridiculous, and I can’t afford a lot. I figure I can grab a two-year degree at a local college and work my way up the ladder somewhere. Maybe something in business.”
“A decent plan.” Dad nodded. “At least you’re not too much of a daydreamer. Rosalie had it in her head she was going to go into music. Can you believe that?” Dad laughed like he’d told the joke of the year.
Ian glanced at me and smiled. I widened my eyes at him, hoping he wouldn’t say anything about the musical.
“Rosalie is a really good singer. She sings for me sometimes.” Ian took a bite of his dinner and winked at me. “She sounds like an angel.”
“Singing won’t get her anywhere in life. What she needs to do is buckle down on her academics,” Dad answered gruffly. “You’re a good kid, Ian. Talk some sense into her. Get that foolishness out of her head.”
“I’ll see what I can do.” Ian chuckled, offering me another wink.
I let out a breath of relief at him not spilling the beans. The rest of dinner was an easy affair. I offered to help my mom clean up, but she laughed and nudged me toward Ian, telling me to show him my room. I thought it was an odd request, but I really didn’t want Ian to have any more opportunities to interact with them, so I led him upstairs.
“So this is it, huh? The chastity queen’s bedroom,” he commented, surveying my stuff.
I grunted a response and sank down onto my bed. He went to my window and pulled my curtains open.
“Ah, and of course, the boy next door. How cute.”
“Ian, don’t.” I sighed. “Close the curtains.”
“Why?” He glanced back at me. “Looks like Fox is home.”
I cast a quick peek at Fox’s window and saw him and Cole inside, looking at a notebook.
Probably adding more names to it. Assholes.
“Stop.” I got up and reached for the curtains, but Ian grabbed me and pressed his lips to mine, his hands sweeping over my waist and up my back.
“What are you doing?” I gasped, breaking away from his kiss.
“Kissing you,” he grunted, going back in for more.
The last thing I felt like doing was kissing him in my bedroom, but he moved me to my bed. He pushed me down on it, his hand working its way beneath my shirt to squeeze my breast.
“Suck my dick, Rosalie,” Ian breathed out, grinding his erection against the apex of my thighs.
“No,” I choked out.
He stopped kissing me and stared down at me. “You don’t fucking tell me no.”
“Please, what if my parents come in? What if—”
“They see?” He snarled. “You’re worried about your fuck boys seeing you sucking cock? I thought you guys were into that sort of thing.”
“Ian, it’s not like that. Please. Just stop. I’ll do it but not here. Not now.”
He rolled off me and got to his feet. “Whatever. He closed the curtain anyway.”
I chanced a glance to Fox’s window to see that he had closed his curtains.
“I need to use your bathroom,” Ian said gruffly.
I pointed toward my adjoining bathroom and watched Ian disappear inside. I sat up and rubbed my eyes as my phone buzzed on the dresser. I snatched it up and looked at the screen.
Fox: No one fucks you like I fuck you. Remember that.
I sighed and darkened the screen. All I wanted to do was go to Ethan.
“You’re on the pill?” Ian called out, coming back into my room, holding my birth control in his hand.
“Hey.” I got up and tried to grab my stuff from him, but he held it high over my head.
“You’re on the pill and won’t fuck me?” He glared down at me.
“It’s not about that,” I snapped, reaching out again.
He scoffed and shoved the pills to my chest.
“Whatever. If we’re going to make an effort at this, then you need to put it forward too.”
“I just wanted time, Ian,” I murmured. “I don’t want to just lie down and spread my legs, OK? I want to make sure this is right. I got hurt so much before. I don’t want to ever feel that again.” I was milking it, sure, but whatever worked.
He sighed when I thought he’d slap me. I clutched the pill pack
et in my hand and stared up at him, waiting for the hammer to fall.
“Fine. I accept it.” He leaned in and pressed a kiss to my lips. “I will. For now. But if shit doesn’t start changing, I’ll just take it. I don’t think you want me to do that.” He nodded to the pill packet in my hands. His dark smirk sent chills down my spine. “Besides, these don’t matter anyway. I want you forever and will do what I need to just to get it. Do you understand?”
“Yes,” my voice was hoarse as he kissed along my jaw.
“It’s hard not to do what I need to do. Sometimes I fail at it and do really bad things. You need to know that I don’t know how long I can control myself. You’re so fucking sexy, especially when you tell me no.” He twined his fingers through my hair and tugged my head back. “But I’ll give you the chance to tell me yes.”
“Thank you,” I rasped before he kissed me again.
“I need to go. I have to meet with some of my associates. I’ll see you later.” He pulled away, and I nodded. “Remember, we’re seeing my dad tomorrow.” He kissed me again and backed to my door, giving me a wink. “I look forward to all of this, Rosalie. I’m not as bad as you think I am. Just give me a chance.”
I offered him a tight smile before he departed.
It was well after nine before I made it to Ethan’s. He met me outside and directed me into the garage where he closed the door. The moment I was out of my seat, his arms were around me, his lips on mine.
“I missed you,” he murmured between kisses.
“Mm, show me how much,” I answered as he kissed me once more then led me inside.
He chuckled, giving my hand a squeeze. When we got inside, he urged me to the couch where we sank down, our lips molding to one another’s again.
“I got you flowers and chocolate,” he whispered against my lips. “They’re on the counter.”
I giggled and tugged him closer. “Let me show you my appreciation then.”
“You haven’t seen them yet.” He chuckled back.
“I don’t need to. They’re from you, so I already love them.” My fingers were already in the waistband of his pajama bottoms.
