Autumn's Rage

by Mary Stone

  Winter clasped her friend’s hand tighter. “I’ll use better judgment from here on out. I’m not going to get caught up in his lies and manipulations. I promise you.”

  She meant that promise. Losing others was too easy. Her parents and her brother had been stolen from her in the blink of an eye when she was only thirteen. She refused to lose herself as well.

  “You’ll have to be sure and tell him that I’m sorry for missing our appointment again.” Autumn smacked her palm to her forehead. “I’ll reschedule as soon as I’m able. Barring more elevator zombies and kidnappings, I should actually make it to our appointment this time.”

  “Don’t beat yourself up. I’m not the only one who’s hard on myself,” Winter admonished, sitting on Autumn’s bed near her feet. “I’m just glad that you’ll be working with him. He needs to know that there are people in this world who refuse to bend over backward for him but are still there for him. People who won’t run away no matter how hard he pushes.”

  “I don’t think I’m running anywhere anytime soon, really.” Autumn’s eyes fluttered shut for a moment. The woman needed, and deserved, some sleep. “I know you can do this, Winter. I know you can love Justin and still keep your wits about you. You’re strong and you’re smart.”

  “Ha. Keep that list going. I kind of like it.” Winter laughed at her own humor. “You’re exhausted. We all know you didn’t just return from a lounge chair in the Bahamas. You can admit you’re spent.”

  Autumn cringed. “Admitting defeat is the worst, but I’m still a bit shaken by everything. That’s natural. At least I’m in one piece, right?”

  “Exactly.” Winter nodded vehemently. “And you need to stay that way. The team needs you, Justin needs you, and I need you. I do.”

  “We don’t always see eye to eye, but you have to know I’m never going to let you down. Never,” Autumn repeated, her eyes glassy with emotion.

  Winter knew this was true. She pulled Autumn into a gentle hug. “Right back atcha, Doc.”

  “I wonder if anyone will be there for Albert. His family is gone.” Autumn frowned, biting her lip as her eyes welled with fresh tears.

  Winter pulled back, her finger wagging in Autumn’s face. “Please tell me you’re not considering visiting Albert Rice in prison.”

  Autumn slapped the finger away. “That’s not what I meant, although I do hope he receives some quality treatment. He spoke a lot about his sister while Philip and I were trapped at that house. More than anything, the man is just heartbroken.” Autumn’s voice cracked with empathy.

  Winter hurt for her friend. Autumn’s heart was so big and so open. That quality made Autumn who she was, and Winter loved that person dearly.

  But she couldn’t deny the quiet fear that rested on her shoulders regarding her sweet friend. Big, open hearts were a wonderful phenomenon.

  But just by being herself, Autumn left a door slightly ajar for danger.

  Winter intended to be the guard dog stationed at that door. Forever, if necessary.

  She hugged her again, firmer this time. “You rest up, okay? That is your official assignment for right now.”

  Autumn waved a hand in the air. “Psh. You’re not my boss.”

  Laughing again, Winter stood and prepared to leave. “I love you.”

  Autumn’s eyes grew shiny with tears again. “Love you too. And Winter…”

  Winter tensed from the change in Autumn’s tone. “What?”

  “That little talk we just had? You need to have the same talk with Noah, and you know I’m right.” Autumn crossed her arms and stared at her, waiting for the statement to be challenged.

  And the award for best Judge Judy impersonation goes to…

  Winter wrinkled her nose in protest but nodded reluctantly as she walked toward the door. “Doctor’s orders, right?”

  “Yep. You have to be transparent with the man you love,” Autumn declared in a haughty, professor-like voice. “Relationships 101.”

  “Says the single invalid on the hospital bed.” Winter pressed her lips together, fighting off the laughter.

  Autumn whistled. “Ouch. Low blow, Black.”

  They met eyes, and the laughter nearly doubled them both over this time.

  “Okay, okay. I have to go now.” Winter attempted to pull herself together. “But I have to admit that I have a really good feeling about the future. For all of us.”

  “Me too.” Autumn clasped her hands together with a satisfied sigh.

  “I’m going to head to the hospital and check on Justin. I’ll let him know you’ll be meeting with him soon. Assuming you can enter that building and not walk straight into some freakishly horrible situation that deters you.” Winter winked at Autumn and grasped the doorknob. “Again.”

  Autumn shot her a bird. “Catch ya soon, Agent Black.”

  “Absolutely, Dr. Trent.” She flashed one last affectionate smile at her friend and entered the ER hallway.

  She did have an overwhelmingly positive premonition about the things to come. In fact, Winter couldn’t remember a single time throughout the whole of her life when she’d felt this optimistic.

  She was going to make the best of what life had given her and be the absolute best sister that she could possibly be, regardless of Justin’s ever-changing reactions and attacks. She wouldn’t hide her head in the sand, either. She would simply be there for him, insanity and all.

  The one thing that she knew for sure was Justin couldn’t say or do anything now that would shock her or send her running. They’d already reached rock bottom as far as sibling interactions went. The only direction their relationship could go was up.

  Winter made a silent plea to any god who might be listening that Justin didn’t prove her wrong.

  35

  Autumn gripped her hospital discharge papers and pulled her bag over her shoulder. The doctors had released her, with explicit instructions to do nothing but rest for the next seventy-two hours.

  Peach and Toad were going to love the quality cuddle time.

  Janice, the cheerful nurse on shift who was tasked with wheeling her to the front doors, had agreed to first wheel her down the hall toward a different door.

  Before Autumn could leave, she wanted to check on Philip Baldwin. The man had been dragged through absolute hell over the last few days.

  And he had saved her life.

  He’d been transferred to a regular inpatient room on the same floor she’d been moved to from the ER and listed as stable, but he wouldn’t be going anywhere for a day or so.

  At least, that was the update she’d been given by Janice, who was more than happy to check at the nurse’s station for her.

  Autumn felt ridiculous being wheeled around, regardless of what she’d experienced that day. She was excited to step foot outside the hospital and be in charge of herself once again. Bedrest or not, she certainly wasn’t an invalid.

  And three hours in the hospital was three hours too many.

  As they reached the numbered doorway of the room Philip was assigned to, she breathed deeply and squared her shoulders. Checking on Philip was the right thing to do, but that didn’t make the undertaking enjoyable.

  “Could you knock please? I wouldn’t want to disturb him.” Autumn gestured toward the door.

  She was damn sure getting permission before entering this time.

  Her upbeat nurse gave two taps and waited.

  “Come in,” Philip responded, his voice gruff and weak.

  “I’ll only be a minute,” she told Janice quietly, opting to stand and enter on her own, sans the wheelchair. Janice nodded her nurse’s consent, but Autumn could tell the woman wasn’t moving an inch until she’d come back out of the room.

  As she pushed the door open and entered, she wasn’t sure of what to expect. Up until this morning, Philip had seemingly hated the very sight of her.

  To be fair, she harbored no particular fondness for him either.

  But today, her regard for Philip had shifted into a m
uch softer light. After what they’d been through together, she figured he couldn’t help but to at least not hate her quite as much as he had when he woke up that morning.

  Philip was sitting up, but angled backward, supported by the adjusted hospital bed. His wavy hair sat in rebellious disarray. Autumn guessed he was also none too pleased to be sporting the light blue hospital gown that was much more exposé than his usual tailored suits.

  “What do you want?” he grumbled, eyeing her warily.

  Autumn approached his bedside. “I had to come by and thank you. You saved my life.”

  Philip snorted. “Don’t seem so shocked. I’ve insisted I wasn’t a killer since the moment you people arrived.”

  “And if you’ll remember, Dr. Baldwin, I told you that I believed in your innocence on more than one occasion.” Autumn offered him a pleasant smile and waited for his typical argumentative response.

  “You’re correct.” He winced and placed a cautious hand to his side. “Perhaps I shouldn’t have dismissed you so easily. But I still hold that there was an endless number of reasons for me to disbelieve you.”

  “Ribs?” Autumn tried not to picture Albert’s ruthless kicks to Philip’s body.

  “Four broken, two dislocated. Extensive internal bruising. Concussion.” Philip recited his injuries with flat indifference. “Lots of pain killers and bedrest are the apparent magical solution.”

  “Yikes. That’s rough. I was worried there might be internal bleeding. I’m very relieved that’s not the case.” Without invitation, Autumn pulled a padded plastic visitor’s chair toward the bed and sat.

  “Dear god, please tell me you aren’t planning on staying long.” Philip held his hands up in protest, but a slight grin revealed the man had a sense of humor after all.

  “Just a few minutes.” Autumn found herself smiling back. “I’m a little wobbly on my feet right now. I have no idea why that would be.”

  Philip lifted a shoulder a fraction. “Strange. A true mystery to me.”

  Autumn laughed, though what they’d endured was far from funny.

  Humor is paramount in this line of work.

  Philip sobered, his gaze dropping to his lap. “I can’t stop thinking about Colleen. I do remember her. She was so incredibly broken. I should have done better by her somehow…prevented that ending.”

  Autumn’s heart squeezed in sympathy. She wanted to save everyone too. “You couldn’t have predicted the choice she would make.” Her opposition to his self-criticism coated each adamant word that flew from her mouth. “You’re being too hard on yourself. She was very unstable, and there’s no magic wand or crystal ball in our profession.”

  Philip shifted in the bed and groaned. Autumn pitied his obvious discomfort and adjusted the multiple pillows behind him to better support his wounded body.

  “Thank you.” He glanced at her, his expression revealing how awkward and uncomfortable the current situation was to him. Autumn understood that Dr. Baldwin wasn’t used to being the patient. He probably struggled to ask anyone for even the slightest bit of help.

  “No big deal. I owe you. You handled yourself very well considering the danger we were in. Impressive.” Autumn hoped she wasn’t ego fluffing the already arrogant man. But he deserved to be told that he’d done something good, something brave, after all the hell they’d put him through with the murder accusations.

  Philip blushed deep red. He appeared to be much more accustomed to handling insults rather than compliments.

  “If you ever want to talk…” now that she’d started the invitation, Autumn wasn’t sure how to finish, so she just plowed on, “about your fear of confined spaces. I’d be more than willing to lend an ear.”

  Philip’s head whipped up sharply, his features contorted into a mask of absolute horror at the suggestion. “No. No, thank you. I have all that under control. I don’t need a shrink. I am a shrink.”

  Autumn was aware that she’d overstepped a boundary, and in doing so, had ended the moment of comradery between them. She sighed and stood from the chair. “Didn’t mean to offend, Dr. Baldwin. I’ll leave you to rest now.”

  He said nothing as she walked to the door. She should have known that Dr. Philip Baldwin could only be civil for so long.

  “Wait. Come back.” His usual deep voice was more of a quiet mumble.

  Surprised, Autumn made a prompt return to his bedside. “Yes?”

  He gazed up at her, his eyes beaming a silent apology. “I haven’t…I’ve just never talked to anyone about that before. Not once.”

  “I understand, Philip.” Her heart squeezed for the man as he trembled, his embarrassment visible. “The majority of people suffering phobias keep their fears to themselves for their entire lives. You know that as well as I do.”

  Philip closed his eyes. “My father had a habit of locking me in the coat closet when I misbehaved.”

  Autumn ached for him. She knew a thing or two about traumatic childhood experiences involving closets. Those memories were stored tight in a box marked “foster care nightmares” somewhere deep in her psyche. Most days, she felt that she’d processed those wounds pretty thoroughly before filing them away.

  But occasionally, a random mental souvenir reared its ugly head.

  “The abuse never went further than that. He never hit me, but I don’t think I’ve ever fully come to terms with the trauma those punishments caused. I’m a grown man…” Philip twiddled his thumbs together, appearing more like a little boy than he may have thought possible. “How silly to be so afraid of something so juvenile.”

  Autumn grabbed his hand, her sympathetic nature making it impossible to not follow through on the impulse to comfort the man. “Not silly. You were mistreated, Philip. Memories of abuse don’t disappear when we turn eighteen, and neither do their effects.”

  Currents of goodness and fragility flowed from Philip’s hand. She sensed the noble heart that had been on display when he came to her rescue. No amount of grumpy Dr. Baldwin-isms could change what she knew to be true of him. Not now.

  “Did you have a happy childhood, Dr. Trent?” The boldness of the question surprised her. In fact, it seemed to have surprised them both.

  A troublesome flash reel of memories played through Autumn’s mind as she struggled to reply. “There were happy parts.”

  Philip cocked his head. “That’s a bit telling. You know, my door is always open should you need to talk.” He followed the offer with what Autumn interpreted as a smartass yet genuine grin.

  “I’ll keep that in mind, Dr. Baldwin. My offer still stands as well.”

  Philip nodded. “Duly noted.”

  “I’ll let you rest,” she proposed for a second time. “I can’t ever thank you enough for what you did. Not ever.”

  Philip met her gaze, his green eyes shadowed and worn. “And I can’t ever thank you enough for helping me clear my name. Albeit in a rather roundabout, haphazard way that nearly got us both killed but…”

  He smiled, and Autumn joined him.

  What a day we’ve had, Dr. Baldwin.

  Autumn headed for the door, remembering that she, technically, was also supposed to be in bed and resting up.

  “Dr. Trent?” Philip called out to her as she opened the door. “You should know that I got a call from the board of Virginia State Hospital. They’re giving me my job back.”

  Autumn processed that for a moment. She had resented Baldwin’s way of running the hospital so much. Was she glad that he was given the chance to be the hateful dictator she first met?

  She decided it didn’t matter. One thing she knew for sure was that she’d never want to be in that position.

  Autumn gave him a firm nod of approval. She had been more than a little worried about what Philip would do without the job he was so invested in. “Congratulations.”

  He rubbed the tip of his nose. “They’re working on the video equipment installation as we speak.”

  Autumn held up a finger and grinned. “Audio too?”
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  He gave his eyes a dramatic roll. “Of course. What idiot would forget audio?”

  “Good point, Dr. Baldwin. I’ll be meeting with Justin Black soon. Maybe I’ll run into you at your hospital.” The thought wasn’t nearly as revolting as it had been less than twelve hours ago.

  “Do you think you can actually enter my hospital without bringing a dust cloud of chaos along?” Philip’s comment was snarky but somewhat fair.

  “I’d like to answer your question to the affirmative, but I’m not sure I could promise you that. I have a way of walking into absurd situations.” She winked at him and left the room.

  She wasn’t even sure she could get out of this hospital before the bells of madness tolled once again.

  36

  Justin Black had envisioned killing Victor Goren so many times that he was becoming bored with the daydream. In all honesty, Victor wasn’t even worth the level of creativity that Justin was capable of.

  Killing is art. Victor is a fart.

  Justin sputtered out uncontrolled, high-pitched giggles.

  Victor stopped whatever mind-numbing, monotonous sentence he had been stumbling through and peered at Justin with caution from his safe distance across their table in the common area. “Did I miss something?”

  He enjoyed the instant hint of fear in his public defender’s voice. Was there anything more lovely in the entire world than a human’s blatant terror?

  He didn’t believe so.

  The rush of adrenaline, which usually played prologue to some of his most intricate kill fantasies, coursed through him. Such a wonderful sensation.

  He wished he were in his room so he could daydream in peace.

  But no. He was sitting like an obedient little lamb at a table in Virginia State Hospital’s common area, letting Goren babble on and on and on about the hospital murders.

  They’d caught the killer…blah blah blah. Baldwin wasn’t losing his job after all…blah blah blah.