Witches in Wonderland

by J. D. Winters

  She had definitely warmed to her subject. “You see, in most haven towns, ghosts are kept under strict lock and key. They’re closely confined, essentially prisoners.” She looked at me assessingly. “You’re Gran Ana’s granddaughter, aren’t you?” she said, obviously evaluating how much I would be expected to understand. “Well, Rennie had a new idea. Her general philosophy is that monsters are people too. You may be aware of her programs for gremlins and such in the outer lands. She read a paper I did on treatment of ghosts and drafted me into helping her. We put our heads together and developed this plan where we make it possible to let ghosts go out and haunt and be basically healthy spirits. I’d observed that ghosts that don’t get their regular dose of haunting end up generally psychologically starved and pretty much insane, and as a consequence, can do very bad things. A ghost can kill a human being if it is desperate or angry enough. Which is why most havens don’t let them run around. I wrote my Master’s thesis on this very subject.”

  My mouth went dry. This was what I was afraid of, only I was pretty sure the ghosts in this house weren’t responding to the lax rules in quite the way Rosy and Rennie had expected. I had to ask her straight out.

  “Do you think one of your ghosts who belong here might have murdered Kenny?”

  Her face registered shock. “Oh no! Of course not. How can you even….?”

  Quickly, I told her about the huge ghost who had knocked me down.

  “Does that sound like one of the ghosts who belong here?” I asked, after I’d told her about it.

  She stared at me and I could tell she didn’t want to have this conversation anymore. Her fingers began to shred the edge of the papers on her clipboard.

  “Okay, listen,” she said at last. “That sounds like Hector. If he’s escaped, I’m in trouble. That means more will be gone. Let me make my inventory and we’ll talk.”

  She went into an empty room and closed the door, but she was back in less than five minutes, looking shaken.

  “They’re all gone,” she said, her eyes a little wild. “What am I going to do?”

  “Who’s all gone?”

  Rennie and Clarissa were walking into the room behind us. Rosy gasped and gave me a warning look. I took the hint and tried to cover.

  “Uh…nothing. All the crew. The filmaking people. I was wondering where they were.”

  So Rosy didn’t want Clarissa—or more likely Rennie—to know the ghosts were missing. I stayed quiet and listened, wondering how this was going to shake out.

  “Don’t worry about the crew,” Rennie was saying. “We’re in the process of moving them all into another house over on Pepper Lane. They are going to be quarantined there for the time being. We need to keep them where we can watch them. Sheriff’s orders.” She looked at me pointedly. “And it would be best if we tried to keep the press away. At least for now.”

  “It will all come out eventually,” Clarissa said gloomily, sounding like the voice of doom. “Things always do.”

  Rennie choked, then cleared her throat. “Uh…maybe we can try hard to keep things on the down-low. Okay?”

  Clarissa laughed derisively. Rennie shot daggers at her, then tossed her reddish hair back and looked harried. “Listen, has anyone seen my cell phone? I can’t find it. Having a phone is crucial right now. I’m desperately trying to find out where Gordon went.”

  “Sorry, Ren,” I said. “I’ll keep my eyes open for it.”

  She nodded, looking about as worried as she sounded. “That reminds me. I’ve got to talk to Shane.” And she was off, hurrying toward the front room where Shane was doing paperwork.

  “I’ve got things to do also,” said Rosy, trying to look chipper, and she hurried off as well, but in the opposite direction.

  I looked at Clarissa. She looked at me.

  “It’s the ghosts, isn’t it?” she said. “I haven’t been able to find one still here. They’re gone, aren’t they?”

  I shrugged. “That seems to be the case.”

  She sighed. “I’m always dealing with incompetence,” she muttered, then looked up and addressed me directly. “I’m going to have to get my stuff moved over to the new house. And subject myself to a session of questioning by that Sheriff’s Deputy.” Her eyes narrowed speculatively. “And then you and I can get busy. You’re spirit sensitive, aren’t you?”

  “I…I guess so. If you mean, can I see ghosts, I’d say yes. At least sometimes.”

  “Good.” She poked me on the arm with her long index finger. Everything about her was long and sinuous and elegant. “We’re going to find the missing ghosts, you and I.”

  No! Not me!

  I braced myself to hold back ridiculous hysteria, but I still sounded breathless when I said, “We are?”

  “Yes. We’ll figure out where they went and get them back.” She rattled the series of long gold chains mixed in with scarves around her neck. Grabbing one of the chains, she pulled out a lovely delicate gold watch and held it up to the light. “Meet me at the stone bench in front of the Sheriff’s Station at noon. I’ll have more information then.”

  Why would I do that? What possible reason would I have to want to spend time with this woman? And yet…I nodded and said, “Okay,” as though I were in a trance and ready to do anything she ordered me to do. Crazy.

  I headed home, connected with Krissy, ate a delicious cinnamon bun she had just pulled out of the oven—suffused with sparkling cinnamon, drenched in sugar icing, drowning in butter. Heaven must be like a cinnamon bun. The ecstasy…

  But I digress.

  I told her a sketchy version of what was going on at “my house” and she listened intently, shaking her head and then telling me things she remembered about the place.

  “It’s such a gorgeous old relic,” she said. “I hope none of this brings it to any harm. I used to love that place.”

  I hesitated, then asked her about Mandy. “How’s that working out?”

  “Gavin adores her. She has a way of joining in his games as though she was about four herself. And she still manages to maintain her adult vibe through all that and keep control of him. I’m super glad she walked in here yesterday. I’m feeling so much less stressed with Gavin looked after properly.”

  “Do you know anything much about her background?”

  Krissy thought for a minute, then shook her head. “Not really. But I trust her. Don’t you?”

  Did I? I went back and forth on that one. I liked her. But did I trust her? Good question.

  “Sure,” I said quickly. “Sure.” Then I looked out the screen door at Mandy and Gavin building a castle in the sandbox and I had to admit, I felt drawn to her. Later on, I would ask about how she knew Derek and all the rest. Later on.

  Before I went out again, I decided I’d better go prepared. This was something I hadn’t done much with so far, but I might as well begin to learn how. Rennie had given me a sachet of Witches’ Powder—basically ground astral, all-spice berries, ashes of a burned black bat, and a few other things, all ground fine and mixed together and put in a little pouch in case of need. What need, you ask? Well, that’s hard to say. She advised me to have it handy in case I needed to throw out some powder to help boost a spell or a command. Or just to look cool. Whatever. Psychology is always half the battle, isn’t it? So I was going to be going in armed. Kind of.

  But the morning was slipping away and I had a murder to deal with. I grabbed my little dog Toto, and took off walking toward Bentley’s. Talking to him always helped me organize my thoughts and I had a lot of thoughts swirling around in my head.

  There was a bright red sports car parked out front. It looked like Bentley must be dealing with a pretty flashy client. I gave it a look as I walked past, then turned in to go through the maze—made it through in no time. I could do it in my sleep by now. Even when Bentley moved a few plants to change up the challenge, I never failed, even though the bushes had rapidly grown pretty tall and difficult to maneuver around. Hooray! At least I had one thing to be pr
oud of.

  I walked into his front office and put Toto down before I said hello to his legal assistant, Sherrie.

  “You can’t bring that mutt in here,” she said sharply before I even had a chance to be pleasant. I tried anyway.

  “Oh, hi Sherrie. Nice to see you.” I picked Toto up and held him in my arms, trying to appease her a bit.

  “Take him out,” she ordered, glaring at me. “No dogs allowed in the attorney’s offices. Mr. St. Ames is busy anyway. He’s not seeing walk-ins today.”

  “Toto won’t hurt anything. I’ll hold him. I just wanted to say hi to Bentley and…”

  “No dogs allowed in the law office,” she repeated, looking smug, as though that really settled everything.

  Like a fool, I took the bait and let my annoyance grow. “Why not?”

  “Muddy feet. Allergy-provoking fur all over the place. Smells.”

  “But I’m holding him. His feet are against me….”

  “Out!” she ordered, pointing toward the door we’d come in through. “Out.”

  Toto barked twice, just to show her he was on my side. The door to Bentley’s office opened and he poked his head out.

  “Hey, there’s my favorite canine,” he said, and Toto leaped out of my arms straight into his. Bentley grinned at me. “Come on in, Haley. I’ve got somebody in here you might want to meet.”

  I glanced over at Sherrie, trying hard to keep the triumph out of my face, but she was typing madly on her keyboard, pretending she didn’t notice a thing. Just as well I suppose.

  “You know that woman hates me, don’t you?” I whispered as I followed Bentley into his office.

  He laughed. “Sherrie hates everybody. But she’s also the best transcriber I’ve ever hired, and she can do paralegal things well too. I couldn’t do this without her. She’s worth her weight in gold to me.”

  He’d obviously made those last two comments in a voice that Sherrie was supposed to hear, and now he closed the door and whispered to me, “And don’t you dare do anything to encourage her to quit.”

  “Oh I won’t,” I said quickly. “It’s just annoying, that’s all.”

  He turned and gestured toward the woman sitting in the chair across from where he sat at his desk. “Haley Greco, meet Phyllis Sands, Kenny Sands’ ex-wife. I assume you’ve heard about the murder?”

  I nodded, looking at the woman with undisguised sympathy. “I’m so sorry,” I muttered, not sure what to say to her.

  She barely acknowledged me, but that was understandable. She had things on her mind. A frizzy blond with her hair piled on her head in an overflowing bun with two pencils stuck in it, as though she’d absent-mindedly left them there for later use, she looked like someone who had been pretty once, but had lost the knack somehow.

  “Yeah, well, I’ve got to admit I’ve sort of been hating on him for awhile now. I mean, I got him started in show biz; I helped him all along the way. I was his agent, you know? Manager, agent, I did it all. And then he finally gets some projects funded, catches the eye of some influential people, and all of a sudden I’m chopped liver as far as he’s concerned. It was ‘bye bye, hit the highway’, you know what I mean? No loyalty, no gratitude.”

  “You are no longer married to him then?” I knew that from the introduction but I wanted to hear how she was going to characterize it all.

  “Nope. We’ve been Splitsville for the last two years. And now someone got mad enough to off him.” She shrugged. “Play with fire and you’re bound to get burned. Karma’s a bitch, you know?”

  “Do you have any idea who….?”

  She didn’t even let me finish the sentence. “I don’t have any idea about much of anything, tell you the truth. I just heard he was going to be in town and I came in hopes that Bentley here would help me get him to pay some back alimony he owes me.”

  “Alimony?” That surprised me.

  “Well, that’s what I call it. It’s just money he owes me. He signed papers and everything and Bentley was going to file a complaint for me. I thought I finally had him where I wanted him. But now…” She sniffed and for a second I thought she might be close to tears. But she pulled out a handkerchief and blew her nose and it became obvious she just had a bit of a cold to deal with.

  “Now that’s not going to work. I’m going to have to find a way to make my claim. I want to get in there before all the vultures start to circle the body. Know what I mean? And Bentley is going to help me with that.”

  She rose and began gathering her things. “Okay then. I’m off to Gran Ana’s. Call me on my cell if you think of anything.”

  “Gran Ana’s?” I stared at her. “Uh…you know Gran Ana?”

  “Sure. She’s my Godmother. I’m staying with her tonight.” She started for the door, tottering on 4 inch sling-back heels. “I’ll be back later, honey,” she called over her shoulder as she left. “You get the legalese jargon pumped up and ready and we’ll let her fly. Okay? Later sweeties.”

  She disappeared out the door. I turned to Bentley, gob smacked and just about floored. “My grandmother is her Godmother?” I sort of shrieked at him. “Are you kidding me?”

  Bentley looked worried. “Hey, Haley. Calm down now. It’s not as bad as….”

  “Bad? It’s darn near impossible. My grandmother is a sorceress. How can she be a Godmother?”

  Bentley laughed shortly. “Come on Haley. Your grandmother can be anything she wants to be at any given time. You should know that by now.”

  I tried hard to avoid hyperventilating. “A Godmother. I don’t know…”

  “Never mind that. Poor Phyllis has been through enough today. Give her the benefit of the doubt, can’t you?”

  I looked at him. He was so sincere. “I’ll try,” I promised. “Really I will.”

  Bentley sighed, shifting Toto to his other arm. “I feel bad for her, but I’m not sure she’s going to be able to get blood from a stone.”

  I frowned. “Do you know her? Before this, I mean.”

  He hesitated, then nodded. “I guess I might as well tell you. I know her and I knew Kenny and Derek too. I did some work down in Hollywood one year, and they lived in the same condo complex where I was staying. We were friendly for awhile.”

  I gazed at him, bemused. “You were in Hollywood?” I shook my head. “So, was everyone in this town living in Hollywood at one time or another? I feel left out.”

  He grinned. “I guess we all get the acting bug when it hits us, don’t we? I mean, how fun to make your living striking poses and speaking clever lines someone else writes for you.”

  “Were you in any movies?”

  He shook his head. “That’s a long story. I’ll tell you all about it some day. But right now, we’ve got murder on our plate, don’t we?”

  I nodded. He was right. “I guess so.”

  “So who did it?”

  “I don’t know. Do you?”

  “Come on. You usually have a pretty good instinct about these things. And you’ve been through the drill a few times already. Give me your first guess.”

  I looked around the room at the hanging speaker system and the likely hiding areas. Bentley might trust Sherrie but I didn’t.

  “Hey, let’s go outside,” I suggested. “I think Toto needs to run a little anyway. We can walk around the chess board and talk.”

  He gave me a look and I knew he understood exactly what I was doing, but he didn’t complain.

  “Sure,” he said, and in a minute we were out there, Toto running free and the two of us making jumps from one large grass square on his huge chessboard layout to another. It was fun, but we had come out there to talk, so we settled into pacing along the outer margin of the “board”.

  “So I guess Rennie’s plan to fill the city coffers with gold from all the touristy people wanting the haunted house experience has come a cropper, hey?” Bentley grinned at me.

  “You might say that.”

  “So lay it on me, babe,” he said as we walked. “What was the sit
uation when you arrived at the house?”

  I thought back. Now that I was here, I wasn’t so sure I ought to tell him everything I knew. And I wasn’t ready to describe the ghost Rosy had called Hector and what he’d done. So I started off telling him about Rennie calling me and why she was there in the first place.

  “As far as I know, the people who were there after midnight included Derek and the cameraman, Mario. Both of them were drinking and then lying about in a stupor, from what I was told. There was Clarissa, who was injured. She says a rampaging ghost did it. Does that seem credible to you?”

  I looked at him quickly, hoping to get a candid response. He gave me his best skeptical look and I nodded in agreement. I still wasn’t sure just what to think of Hector.

  “Me either. I don’t really know what to make of that. But Shane found her unconscious when he went upstairs.”

  “And that’s when he found the other two men konked out as well?”

  “By drink or something else of a recreational nature. Yeah. But they didn’t have injuries like Clarissa does.”

  “Interesting. Just what were her injuries?”

  “Hmm.” To tell the truth, I never noticed anything concrete. “Anyway, Rennie’s brother Gordon may have been there for awhile, but he was gone by the time I got there this morning.”

  “All the others on the crew were gone?”

  “Except for Lilah, the key grip. But she says she didn’t see or hear anything. Rennie said some of the crew had gone to stay in a hotel. They didn’t crave the haunting experience the way Kenny did.”

  “And that was it?”

  I hesitated, thinking about my grandmother and how I’d seen her arriving. But that was earlier. And besides, I wasn’t going to rat out my own grandmother. Was I?

  I glanced over at Bentley, wondering if he could read minds. I’d never wondered that about him before, but then, I’d never been trying to hide something from him before. Was that what I was doing now, trying to hide my grandmother’s possible involvement? Wow. I didn’t like that, but I wasn’t ready to spill it all either. Let it be. I would think it through later.

  Besides, there was no way Gran Ana stuck a knife in Kenny’s chest. Still, I knew in the world she lived in, there were many ways to effect an action without actually doing it yourself.