by B. B. Reid
I hung my head even as my fists balled. I was at war with myself. All my fault. Slowly, my fingers uncurled. I had no right to be angry.
I felt Jamie’s lips at my ear in an instant. “You see love, you break love. That’s what you do.”
My head felt heavy when I finally lifted it, but I pushed past my sorrow. “We weren’t in love, Jamie. It was summer, and you were fun. Get over yourself.”
I tried to walk around him, but he pulled me back with a hand on my arm.
Tilting my chin, he held my gaze. “I still am,” he whispered. “A hell of a lot more than when we were kids.”
The hand holding my chin slid down my side slowly. As if I hadn’t been humiliated enough, the asshole began groping me in front of the entire school.
“We both love unrequited,” he continued while caressing my ass, “that’s the answer to the riddle. My cousin clearly just made his choice. Have some fun with me.”
“If I’m ever in the market for an STD, I’ll let you know.” Jamie didn’t stop me this time when I pushed him away, but I should have known he’d never let me leave with my head held high.
“Let’s give it up for Four, everyone. The better bachelorette got the rose.” Jamie started clapping again, but this time, he wasn’t alone. Slowly, the crowd that had remained to witness the Jamie Freak Show joined him, and they didn’t stop there. I could still hear them chanting Four’s name when I rushed through the door and out onto the front lawn. I wanted to run, but I realized as I looked around that there was nowhere to go. Ever was the last person I could turn to, and I’d pushed him too far.
I see love, I break love. That’s what I do.
I’d gone to bed last night happy to finally put the disastrous day behind me until I realized my nightmare was only beginning. Tonight was prom night, and my parents were fully expecting me to attend on my fiancé’s arm.
I started the morning pretending to be sick, but by the end of the day, it hadn’t mattered to my parents. I was going to prom. They saw tonight as an opportunity for me to warm Ever’s cold feet.
Just wait until they heard the rumors.
I could tell them myself, but I had a better idea. I could run.
Who needed a high school diploma, anyway? I’d taken my final exam on Monday and knew that I’d passed. Without a social life, the only thing I had to occupy my time was my studies. I’d studied hard and made straight A’s, knowing that college would never be an option. I never got the chance to dream, anyway. I didn’t know if I wanted to be a doctor or an astronaut or a reality TV star. It’s not too late to find out.
“Now, Barbette, tonight is very important,” my mother said, chasing away the hope warming my chest. She handed me a pair of gold heels that were cruel to my poor, helpless feet. They hadn’t asked for any of this. As I slipped the heels on, I winced thinking about the night ahead that I had in them. “Whatever is going on with Ever, I trust you’ll help him see things your way.”
“Should I sleep with him, Mother?”
“That’s enough, Barbette! This is serious!”
“Regardless, proper ladies never raise their voice,” I chastised as she had done me so many times before.
She paused before patting her bun and smoothing the wrinkles from her dress. “We need you to understand what’s at risk. Without the McNamara’s money, your father and I will be ruined.”
“What about me? Do you even care what happens to me?”
“Ever will be good to you.”
“And if he doesn’t marry me? Would you really let Father marry me to some geezer with a limp penis and a handful of Viagra? Don’t you care what people will say then?”
“Don’t be dramatic, Barbette. He won’t be old.”
“But he might be cruel.”
“Your father has many friends with young, handsome sons who can give you the life you deserve.”
“I deserve to be unhappy?”
“You deserve to have all the finer things in life.”
As I looked away, my gaze landed on the pair of scissors resting on my vanity. Like I had when I was twelve-years-old, I longed to cut away my tresses until there was nothing left. Now I knew it would never be enough. Rather than urge me to nourish the good I held inside, my parents carved it out until I was left with nothing to offer except my skin—the beauty they valued above all else.
I was hollow, empty, and now that Ever had finally chosen the only girl who should matter, I was on my own. The reality of my situation sinking in felt like the key sliding into a lock and turning. The door opened, and I waited on its threshold for despair and panic to take hold and devour me.
Something else entirely emerged.
“Would you still believe that if I were no longer beautiful?” Picking up the scissors, I held the sharp end to my face near my temple. The sad, lonely wind swirling inside my shell ceased the moment Ever walked away from me yesterday. I assumed I’d finally broken. I didn’t know until this moment that it had only been the quiet before the storm. The tempest I’d fought so hard to protect was no longer content to wait in her tower. She wanted out, and she was done asking permission. “Tell me, Mother. Would you?”
Seeing the wrath brewing in my eyes, she took a step back but her horror when I dug the scissors into my skin kept her from taking another. I kept pressing, relieved that I could still feel pain, and then I dragged them down…
I didn’t get far before my mother broke free of her shock and wrangled the scissors from my hand. I watched her toss them across the room.
“Look what you’ve done!” Rushing into the en suite, she returned seconds later with a first aid kit. I stared at myself in the mirror, unfazed by the blood running down my perfectly made-up face. “You better hope your father doesn’t find out what you’ve done.”
I scoffed because my father had given me wounds far worse than this. Besides, Elliot Montgomery barely noticed anything when it came to me. I’d been a daughter when he wanted a son, so he had no interest in me, and before realizing my beauty could garner him millions, he had no use for me, either.
After cleaning and bandaging my cut that was barely more than a scratch, she fixed my makeup before rearranging my hair so that the wound wouldn’t show.
Once done, she stood back, searching for imperfections. Finding none, she scooped the scissors from the floor. “You won’t be getting these back.”
I was silent as I watched her go. The moment the door closed, I stood and crossed the room until I reached my nightstand. For the millionth time today, I picked up my phone, but after a few minutes of staring at the blank screen, I set it back down. Maybe there was nothing I could say to make things right. I was probably the last person Four wanted to hear from, anyway.
Tossing my phone into the small gold clutch that my mother loaned me, I headed downstairs. Time to face the music.
There would be no Prince Charming ringing my doorbell tonight and no carriage ride to the ball. I joined my parents in the parlor room, where they waited for Ever to arrive.
My mother glided over to me, a graceful smile spreading her painted lips as if nothing had happened. “Doesn’t she look beautiful, Elliot?”
My father barely glanced at me before nodding. “She’ll suffice.”
I almost longed for the days when there was someone around to impress. It was the only time my father treated me like a human being. Elliot Montgomery couldn’t have his friends and business partners thinking he was mentally and emotionally abusive toward his daughter.
At least he doesn’t beat me anymore.
During those early days spent turning me into this shell, I’d been the most resistant. It wasn’t until my father learned how easily I bruised on the outside that he stopped. They hadn’t cared about the scars they’d left behind on the inside.
My mother rejoined my father at his side, and I took a seat on the sofa across from them, getting comfortable before pulling my phone from my clutch.
I was so close to finally beating level ni
nety-seven of Candy Crush. And let’s face it, I had all night.
“What time did Ever say he’d be picking you up?” my father questioned. “It’s after nine.”
“He didn’t say,” I answered without looking away from my game. Sensing my father’s anger, I smiled only to curse under my breath when I ran out of moves.
“Barbette, you’ll show your father respect,” my mother chastised.
“Why? I have as much respect for him as he does for me.” My father angrily shoved to his feet, so I finally gave him my full attention. “Are you going to beat me?” I mocked. “Send me to prom all broken and bruised? What will people think?”
“Oh, don’t you worry, daughter. I’ll make sure they won’t see a damn thing under that dress.”
He took a threatening step forward, and although my breath had gotten caught in my throat, I stood, too, inching toward the lamp on the side table. I was no longer the thirteen-year-old girl who’d been too terrified of her father to fight back.
Just as he raised his hand to slap me down, and I dove for the lamp, the doorbell rang. My father and I froze with less than two feet separating us.
“Oh, dear, that must be Ever,” my mother announced.
Knowing that it couldn’t be, I clutched the lamp tighter, preparing to strike if my father so much as blinked at me wrong.
“Barbette, please put that down,” my mother urged. “Someone might see.”
“Tell your husband to back off.”
To my surprise, he did just that, though the threat in his eyes was still there. “We’ll revisit this conversation later.”
“Looking forward to it.” I had no idea what had gotten into me. I just knew I refused to be their whipped dog any longer.
The doorbell rang again, and my mother rushed to answer the door. I kept my gaze on my father even after he was seated again and sipping his brandy with his legs crossed as if nothing had happened. Of course, he wouldn’t want Ever to know that he’d just been preparing to beat his fiancé.
“Barbette.” My mother’s soft voice carried from the foyer. Tossing the lamp on the sofa, I charged from the room. A man I didn’t recognize stood inside the foyer with his cap in his hand.
“Madam. I’m Oliver, your driver for the night.”
“Well, where is Ever?” my mother asked. “Shouldn’t he be here to escort you?”
“He’s probably still embarrassed over the interview.” Laying a comforting hand on her arm, I thanked God for not giving me sensibilities as delicate as my mother’s. “Give him some time.” Turning to the driver, I narrowed my gaze on him. “Ever did send you, right?”
Oliver simply smiled, although nervously, before extending his hand toward the open front door. I moved until I could see out the door and stared at the white stretch limo parked in the drive. The windows were too dark for me to see who waited inside.
Why had Ever come? He should have been on his knees, begging Four’s forgiveness. Hell, I should have been right beside him.
Angry with my best friend for being such a fucking, self-sacrificing idiot, I marched past the driver and out the front door without saying goodbye to my mother.
Oliver somehow managed to beat me to the limo, and I offered him a weak smile when he opened the door for me. The moment it closed behind me, I knew I’d been led into a trap. I saw the shadow of a hand reaching up before there was a click. Light now bathed the other end of the limo and the passenger sitting underneath the soft glow.
The moment Jamie flashed his teeth in a wolfish smile, I reached for the door. Surprisingly, Jamie didn’t try to stop me. A second later, I learned why when the door wouldn’t budge.
“Child locks,” he announced. “Man’s greatest invention.”
Huffing, I slammed my clutch on the leather bench. “Don’t you ever get enough?”
Jamie didn’t respond as he leaned over, lifted a bottle chilling on ice and two glass flutes, and began pouring. “You’ll be pleased to know that I’m insatiable.”
“Why would I care?”
“Because at the end of the night, I’m going to fuck you. Champagne?” He offered me the flute, and after the week I had, I was tempted to take it, but considering his claim and his confidence behind it, I figured it was best to keep my guard up. There was no part of me that believed Jamie would take advantage, but I wasn’t so sure I wouldn’t.
“No, thank you. How did you even get that?”
“I have my ways.”
“You stole it,” I said, reading between the lines.
“I have my ways,” he repeated. Leaning back, he sipped at his champagne as he admired me from head to toe. I plucked at the material of my gown and tried not to wonder what he thought since he’d chosen it for me. After yesterday, I shouldn’t care. “Come here.”
My lips parted for “No” to slip past them until I realized that one way or another, Jamie would have his way. Sliding over to make room for him, I lifted a brow and waited.
Grinning, he came to me, sitting close enough for our thighs to touch.
“Jamie, this bench is at least six feet long. Do you have to sit so close?”
“Six feet?” He turned his head back and forth as if measuring himself. “I’m six-four. It’ll be tight, but I’m sure we can make it work.” Resting his arm above my head, he leaned down to kiss me, and I pressed my fingers against his lips stopping him.
“You are not six-four.”
Jamie’s eyes sparkled as he grinned down at me. “All right, you got me. I’m six-two.” I pursed my lips while he held my gaze, trailing his fingers down my bare arm and leaving goose bumps in their wake. “I like seeing you like this.”
“Like what?”
“Vulnerable.”
I curled my lip. “You mean weak.”
“Yes,” he replied unapologetically. “I know how strong you are, Bee. I’ve seen it for myself, but knowing you’re as powerless against me as I am for you gets my dick hard, too.”
“And who says I want you hard?”
His crooked smile was barely visible in the dark. “Neither of us has much choice in that aspect, I’m afraid.”
I didn’t have anything to say that wouldn’t damn us both, so I let my head fall back against the seat and said nothing. I felt safe in the cocoon Jamie provided.
“We’re bad for each other,” I reminded him.
His lids lowered as he bit his bottom lip. He looked ready to eat me alive, and I felt ready to let him. “That’s what makes it so exciting.”
“And when the excitement wears off?”
He didn’t respond as he slowly lowered his head. My breaths came hard and fast when he pressed his lips to the top of my breasts spilling out of my gown. How did we get here? Yesterday, we were enemies.
You still are.
My pussy didn’t seem to care, and if it weren’t for the thick volume of the ball gown, proof would have soaked the leather seats by now. Each of his soft kisses burned hotter than the last.
Jamie started making his way up my neck, and it felt as if he was leaving no part of me untouched. “It’s been five years,” he reminded between kisses. “Are you feeling less enthused about us yet?”
“Lust and love are not the same thing.”
“Thank God,” he agreed with a groan. “The human race would never survive.”
“Do you really think we can make love without trust?”
He stiffened before lifting his head to meet my gaze. “Make love?” he echoed incredulously before shoving his fingers through his hair and ruining the gel he’d used to style it. “Jesus fuck, you really are a virgin.”
“That’s your opinion.” I looked away to stare out the window.
Gripping my chin, he turned my face toward him. “Then tell me who was stupid enough to touch what’s mine, because it sure as fuck wasn’t my cousin.”
“Does it matter?”
“You were a virgin when I left you,” he said, gripping my chin harder. “You should have stayed that way.�
�
“Did you?” I asked, knowing very well he hadn’t. He’d flaunted his escapades in my face since he’d come back nearly a year ago. And there were the rumors…
“I wasn’t waiting around for someone who preferred my cousin.”
“And now you know that’s not true.”
“I don’t know shit,” he spat, nostrils flaring. “All I know is that my cousin no longer wants you.”
Once again reminded of my dismal future, I pushed him away, and he didn’t fight me. A moment later, a newspaper appeared in his hand bearing yesterday’s date. I stared at the front page with disdain. How could I let them do that to Four and Ever? This time, it wasn’t my parents who’d been the villain. They truly believed Ever and I were engaged. No, this one was all on me.
I should have called off the interview, made some excuse. It should have never gone that far.
“‘A Fairy Tale to Remember,’” Jamie mused. “I wonder who came up with that.”
Unconsciously, I tightened my grip on the dress he’d handpicked just for me. I’d even followed his bold instructions not to wear anything underneath. I was sure the full skirt of the ball gown would keep my secret. He’d never have to know.
At the moment, his full attention was on the newspaper strangled in his tattooed fist. Anyone would think that the announcement of my engagement to his cousin was news to him, but I knew exactly the cause of his displeasure.
“Believe me,” I said, ignoring the heavy feeling in my chest, “it wasn’t me.”
He snorted because his arrogance wouldn’t allow him to believe anything else. “Do the people at the Blackwood Tribune know that you plagiarized the story you gave them?”
“I didn’t plagiarize anything.”
“Yeah?” he challenged, teeth bared. “Well, that story sure as fuck wasn’t about you and Ever, so what would you call it?”
“It was about me, actually.”
“And me.”
I gave up the battle to appear unbothered and turned my gaze away. I watched the town pass by through the limousine window, but I didn’t see any of it. “Get lost, Jameson.”
“I am lost, Bette.” His voice held a desperate note, pleading for me to understand, to let him make it right. No way did my heart just skip a beat. Foolish thing. “You promised to light the way.”
