Raze (The Completionist Chronicles Book 4)

by Dakota Krout

  A new skill! How long had it been since he got one? Only a few days, actually. Still, he seemed to be getting fewer recently. Then again, he had been branching out less as well. The fights resumed, with the creatures winning the next three battles in a row. This meant no auction, but that was fine with Joe.

  The next few hours passed swiftly, and Joe dutifully purchased goods and items. Then… then something appeared that he really wanted.

  “Ladies and Gentlemen!” the announcer, the Ringleader, spoke to the crowd. “We have just gained a new item, an Injection! For those of you in the know, this is a Legendary-ranked potion, one rank below a Concoction! Now, this Injection has been appraised to provide a fifteen-point boost to intelligence!”

  There were appreciative murmurs from the crowd, but the next words stopped them. “This particular injection does have a few side-effects that may seem unpleasant, but a day or two of seclusion is no matter for such a distinguished crowd! Firstly, the injection creates in the user a nearly irrepressible urge to hug whoever or whatever they see. This will last a full day and isn't normally an issue.”

  A pause. “The other side effect is a twelve-hour-long loss of bowel control. As I am sure you all realize, this particular combination has unfortunate possible repercussions. We will start the bidding at ten platinum.”

  Joe couldn't believe what he was hearing. So what if there was a messy consequence? Why was no one bidding? …Noble Pride! Yes! Everyone knew that whoever bought this would have no bowel control, and so would everyone else! Joe bid on the Injection and waited.

  Every time someone else bid on it, the price only raised a small increment. Joe waited until the Ringleader started to count down and raised the bid. He was given a Legendary potion for just under sixteen platinum. Joe couldn’t even believe that had just happened. The small bottle arrived in his room, and Joe shook his head.

  “Well, butler, I think we are done here. Can you call for my cart? With this, I am out of money, and we are nearing the end of the evening anyway.” Joe held the bottle and pretended to try and put it in his ring. “Oh right, can't store this. Well, I’d hate to lose it… better drink it then.”

  He popped the top and swallowed the small mouthful that was in it even as the butler tried to stop him. “Sir! I… you could have gotten your ring back…”

  The cart stopped in front of the room, and Joe sat down in it. This made the butler wince as he put the ring on Joe’s hand, but the potion hadn't taken effect yet. When it did, the effect was instant.

  Intelligence +15! You have gained a debuff: Seep and Squeeze! For 24 hours, the urge to hug things and people around you becomes nearly unbearable! You have no bowel control for 12 hours! Anything in there? Let’s find out!

  “I don't… feel so well.” Joe stated as his stomach released an ominous rumble. Then his eyes rolled up into his head, and he collapsed on the cart. The butler hissed in annoyance.

  “Go, go! Ugh!”

  Joe thrashed twice, and his eyes re-opened. They held a new clarity, and the world around him seemed so much easier to understand. He had reached the next threshold of intelligence. As the cart started to move, a shadow snaked out of the cart and into the room he had just vacated, connecting to a dark patch on the other side of his balcony. The shadows became firm, and as the cart was hurried out of the building… a dark line followed them.

  Chapter Fifty

  Joe pretended to be unconscious, and his stomach continued to rumble and twitch violently. To pass the time as they moved, he looked at his updated stat page.

  Name: Joe ‘Tatum’s Chosen Legend’ Class: Jumplomancer (Actual: Rituarchitect)

  Profession: Tenured Scholar (Actual: Arcanologist)

  Character Level: 15 Exp: 134,813 Exp to next level: 1,187

  Rituarchitect Level: 3 Exp: 4,640 Exp to next level: 1,360

  Hit Points: 330/330

  Mana: 1,590/1,590

  Mana regen: 30.3/sec (Base 27.55/sec increased by gear)

  Stamina: 295/295

  Stamina regen: 5.67/sec

  Characteristic: Raw score (Modifier)

  Strength: 31 (1.31)

  Dexterity: 40 (1.40)

  Constitution: 38 (1.38)

  Intelligence: 106 (3.06)

  Wisdom: 76 (2.26)

  Charisma: 31 (1.31)

  Perception: 60 (2.10)

  Luck: 30 (1.30)

  Karmic Luck: 0

  The first thing he saw was the ‘three’ in his intelligence modifier. If he went with the direct translation, that is, the average IQ being one-ten back on earth, did this mean that he would have an IQ of three-thirty-six point six? His brain was on fire, and his thoughts were zipping along at a rapid pace. Now, he didn't feel smarter, but he was able to clearly think about multiple things concurrently and process them at the same time.

  This was going to help his spellcasting tremendously; he could already tell. Now… they were getting near the exit. It was time to make his move. Joe lurched into a seated position, “Oh, lordy! I need… I need a bush right now!”

  “Sir, we are just about to teleport. No one is allowed to be in this area on foot,” the butler ground out through clenched teeth.

  “Well, alright. I guess I’ll just… sit in this as it comes.” A wet sound could be heard, and Joe started to sit.

  “No! Off, off, off!” The butler yanked Joe out of the cart and shoved him to the edge of the path they were on. As Joe stepped past the bush, he realized that only the path had ornamental plants along it; otherwise, the area was fully empty; just bare stone.

  “Oh…?” Joe hiked up his robe and let everything flow naturally. Time to work; no one was going to come bother him when he was making sounds like this. He pulled out his large Mana Battery and gave it a kiss, then did the same with the smaller one he had. He Cleansed himself and stood straight, holding both Cores in the air.

  He looked over at the arena, watching as the closing ceremony began. Spells, light show… he sent a pulse of mana along the shadowy path. His hope was rewarded an instant later.

  Would you like to activate the ritual ‘Raze’ on Bloodsport Arena? Yes / No.

  “Ye~ee~ess,” Joe grunted as a powerful spasm made him clench. He managed to stay upright, and a blue ritual circle appeared under him as well as under the Mana Batteries. For an instant, he was holding twin blue orbs of power as a ritual sprang into existence across the rocky plain. “See you, buddies.”

  Joe dropped one of the objects right behind him, into a bush, where it landed with a faint *splash*. Hoo-boy. He tossed the other as hard as he could and pulled a huge tube out of his codpiece. The shouting was starting as people around the area saw the active ritual. There was no way he could claim ignorance when the circle shining at his feet matched the one on the arena. “Activate ritual of the Ghostly Army.”

  The scroll he was holding vanished, and Joe flinched. No effect? He needed to–

  *Whump*

  A fog bank a hundred feet tall and half a mile long sprang into existence so quickly that it displaced the air and made soft thunder. One of the effects of the fog was that it distorted sound, so Joe felt like he had once again entered a new world. This was a world of dim light, poor vision, and soft, cloying motions in the air. Joe knew what he needed to do, though. He kept his hand on the bushes and started to walk. He followed the foliage, walking slowly until it started to curve out and away.

  “This has gotta be the teleportation landing point,” Joe spoke aloud and, even so, couldn't hear the words clearly. There were a… few things he was able to hear, however. There was a low, muted buzz that seemed to come from everywhere, a deep humming that was coming from somewhere near him, and high-pitched trills that seemed to be moving around.

  “Magical Synesthesia?” Joe took a step forward, following a moving trill. When it was right in front of him, a man appeared. No… a Jester! The man saw him at the same moment, and a curved dagger flicked out at Joe.

  He jumped to the side and started pulling ma
na into a thin Exquisite Shell. Oddly, the Jester didn't follow him, and Joe got a notification.

  Quest updated: Playing your fake role III. Avoid pursuit three times by jumping to an improbable location and escaping unseen. 1/3. Dodge ten attacks by jumping out of the way. 1/10. Finish destroying a structure while in mid-air. 0/1.

  Joe got the message: don't follow the trilling noises. It appeared that meant that there were… perhaps enchanted weapons? The low buzz was moving away, and Joe had to assume that was the ritual, as it was everywhere and moving at the pace of a marching army. What was the deep hum, then? Hopefully, what he was looking for.

  He crawled along the ground, leaving a dark trail for different reasons than earlier. Joe was just glad that he couldn't hear anything from back there. Feeling it was bad enough. His fingers started to feel regular lines on the ground, and he brought his face close enough that he could see them. Enchantment-style runes and lines! He could only hear a mass of sound and decided that it was time to use the last four skill points that he had been holding on to.

  Skill increased: Magical Synesthesia (Novice VII). You can hear magic in the middle of a sound-distorting ritual, but you can't even listen to your body right now. You are very strange.

  Yes! He could make out individual noises now, just barely. Joe followed the deep hum, working hard to distinguish various lesser sounds mixed into the magical mental noise. Hah. A sense that worked even through his rituals. Something to remember.

  “That… that one is familiar.” Joe followed a small sound, and when he found it, he was overjoyed to realize that it was the exact sound that he heard in altars and various waypoints. All of this—the huge enchantment that acted as a landing pad—was all so that the Zoo could replicate the same ability the fast travel system had? Joe pricked his finger and touched it to the exact spot that the sound was emanating from.

  You have wrested control of an area enchantment from the previous owner! They have been notified of their loss! Current functions of area: teleport to Grand Zoo of Ardania, teleport to Ardania Main Square. Current people allowed to use this enchantment: Joe.

  Joe looked toward the Bloodsport Arena. It was really too bad that he couldn't collect the building material or at least see what was happening over there. Still… this was an area filled with assassins. Angry, vengeful, clown-like assassins who were in the process of losing their base. Probably better to get going. Joe stood up and formed a black barrel made of shadow. He made the bottom thin and pulled his staff out of his ring. To hold off his other current need, he got close and wrapped himself around his creation. Big hug for shadow barrel.

  “Acid Spray!” Joe channeled the spell, and after twenty seconds, the barrel was half-full and hissing. He gripped the shadows with his mind and took one last look toward the arena. The mist was thinning, which made him realize how exposed he was, but… it also let him see the sky. All the stars and such but somehow much closer than usual. “It's a projection? We’re underground!”

  Now it made sense why this place was nearly impossible to find. Joe looked at the enchantment at his feet and even recognized it. This was a massive version of the elevator enchantment he had once bribed Terra with! That meant… that meant they were under Ardania! But how far?

  “You!” A Jester appeared out of the thinning mist. “Who are you? What are you doing?”

  “Just watering my barrel,” Joe replied easily, continuing to channel acid. “Don’t mind me.”

  “Stop what you are doing this instant, and come with us! You are in a cart-restricted area. If you do anything besides follow my instructions, we will cut you down!”

  “I’m so sorry. I had no idea.” Joe continued filling the barrel.

  Skill increase: Acting (Novice IX).

  Skill increase: Channeling (Beginner V).

  “Come with me!”

  “Nah.” When Joe replied, the other Jesters surrounding the area attacked. Joe focused his mind and jumped. He vanished in a flash of light, and the blades *clanged* together in the air where he had stood. The dark barrel wavered for a moment, then the bottom disintegrated, followed by the rest of it. Potent acid washed over the etchings and lines of the elevator enchantment. The acid combined with a bonus five percent armor penetration managed to score and pit the strong enchantment so badly that it was unrecognizable within moments. In under ten seconds, the enchantment sputtered, flashed, and failed.

  Just like that, an Assassin’s Guild, a black market, and a collapsing arena full of Nobility and wealthy lawbreakers were trapped in the depths below Ardania.

  Epilogue

  Twelve hours after fleeing for his life from the Bloodsport Arena, Joe sat in the waiting room of the palace. He had jumped in place for as long as he could while the ritual circle remained around his feet, and he had gotten lucky enough to be in midair as the ritual finished. Then he had waited until the… first effect of the Injection had worn off, but he was still in an extra-huggy mood and so was trying not to push himself to see the King just yet. Cleanse had been a constant companion, but there had still been… mishaps on the way here.

  Joe shook off the thought and looked over the notifications he had gained. While he had the ability to go into the throne room if he pushed it, there was no need to rush. Better to wait until they were ready for him. He decided to look over the messages that had appeared over the last few hours, alternatively wincing and smiling.

  You have a characteristic that is two thresholds above others! Look at the full listing of debuffs that this places upon you here*.

  You have reached a hundred points in intelligence! Mana becomes more plentiful for you, and each point of intelligence is now worth fifteen points instead of twelve point five!

  An area enchantment you control has been destroyed! Outgoing teleportation functionality damaged beyond repair.

  Your reputation with the Grand Zoo of Ardania has decreased by 10,000! New reputation: -11,300 (Blood Feud). All members of this faction will attempt to kill you on sight!

  Quest updated: Playing your fake role III. Avoid pursuit three times by jumping to an improbable location and escaping unseen. 1/3. Dodge ten attacks by jumping out of the way. 1/10. Finish destroying a structure while in mid-air. 1/1.

  Class experience +500!

  The positive messages made him happy, but Joe had serious misgivings about each of the negative ones. He took a deep breath and started with the listing of debuffs. Reading over it, he deflated and realized that this must be the way the game punished unbalanced characters and that he would need to start putting in more effort to increase his stats.

  Intelligence is two thresholds above charisma! Debuff added: Hammerwords. Does this dress make my butt look big? ‘Yes. Go Up a size. It does not fit.’ Effect: Blunt objectivity at the cost of some subtleness. Usually all of it. 5% Chance to decrease reputation by a full rank during conversation.

  Intelligence is two thresholds above constitution! Debuff added: Not a chance. No, I'm not doing it. That's going to be terrible for me. Get someone else or actually pay attention so we can do this smartly. Effect: When planning something, there is a 5% chance that you will realize that it is a terrible idea beyond redemption.

  Intelligence is two thresholds above dexterity! Debuff added: Risk Assessment. Based on my knowledge of candelabras and swing ropes… you are an idiot, and I'm not doing this. Effect: 10% chance of not making dexterous decisions when there might be an easier option.

  Intelligence is two thresholds above luck! Debuff added: I Know Better! Little Joey would soon learn that he did not, in fact, know better. Effect: 1% chance to make a terrible decision.

  Intelligence is two thresholds above strength! Debuff added: Calculation Drain. Overthinking so much that you've determined that while you can hit and do damage, you missed your chance to do so. Less chance of making an attack, rather than missing one. Effect: -10% speed of action decision.

  “Yeesh.” Joe looked over the various things that he had going against him right now
and gulped. “Right… I need to get everything under the threshold of fifty above it before I get wisdom to one hundred. I bet that would add a whole slew of additional debuffs.”

  Wisdom +1!

  “Ahh! My stats are trying to kill me!” Joe yelped, jumping to his feet. At that moment, the door to the waiting room opened, and a Royal Guard stepped in.

  “They are ready for you.”

  No other words were spoken on the subject, and none were needed. The guard looked down at Joe, somehow managing to tolerate the arms that were wrapped around his waist. “Sorry, I have a debuff on that makes me want to hug.”

  “I knew there was a reason they sent me in.” The huge guard sighed and listened intently. Indeed, he could hear light snickering. “Resist it. Shape up. The Royal Court are waiting.”

  Joe pulled back, somehow managing to resist the compulsion. “I’m good. Let’s go.”

  They walked into the throne room, which had as many people as when Joe was here on trial. The place was packed. Joe was guided to the open dais, and the guard pulled him along to make sure he didn't stop and hug everyone. By being held in place, he managed to look at the Royal couple without charging at them for a hug. That just… wouldn't go well.

  “Joe, Tatum’s Chosen Legend.” The King’s voice rocked the room, leaving everyone slightly dazed. “You were given a mission by the Crown to infiltrate a dark cesspool of danger and villainy. In doing so, you may have provided a great service to the Kingdom.”

  Quest complete: Black to Purple. After finding the unique building, you managed to 1) Create a blueprint for the Kingdom to use. 2) Destroy the building. But failed to 3) Secure a way to and from the location without outside assistance.

  Rewards: Two objectives completed. Rewards: 1) Record remains clean, previous wrongdoing expunged. 2) Act of Nobility recorded.

  “Tell us what happened in as much detail as you are able,” the King ordered. Joe launched into his story, and as he spoke, the tension in the room mounted, reaching dangerous levels. “I see… you say that this place was constantly frequented by the Nobility? Interesting. Also, you failed to secure a way to and from the location but did manage to make the trip one-way. In so doing, you may have managed to capture even more lawbreakers. Interesting indeed.”