Brave Love

by Allyson Simonian

“You could say that, I guess.”

  She looked down at her paperwork. “Well, I can tell you it’s been listed for over a month. No offers yet, to my knowledge. Great neighborhood, but the state of the house seems to be scaring people away. It’s already priced well, but you could probably offer even lower.”

  The woman leveled an appraising gaze on him as he looked around again. “You got a girlfriend who’s going to move in here with you?”

  “No.”

  She raised her brow in surprise. “Really? Handsome guy like yourself?”

  He met her gaze. This agent was good and had come highly recommended by a fellow officer. But Ethan recognized the gleam in her eye. He could just imagine her trying to fix him up with one of the single daughters she’d mentioned as they’d walked the property.

  Ethan had been set up a few times in the past, and each situation had been awkward, to say the least. He wasn’t looking for a long-term relationship. And while he was open to something casual and short-term, he wasn’t eager for another blind date.

  Steering the conversation back to the house, he said, “I’d like to take a couple of days to think about it.”

  The agent handed him a packet of disclosure forms, suggesting he call her sooner rather than later, then drove away with a wave. After taking one last look at the house, Ethan got inside his truck.

  Once home, he sat down at his kitchen table with the stack of paperwork he’d been given. He’d barely made it through the first few pages when he pinched the bridge of his nose. The words had become a familiar blur, appearing to move about the page.

  Determined, he picked up the paperwork again. If there was one thing he needed to look at, it was the inspection report. Shuffling through, he found what he needed and forced himself to focus, employing the coping techniques he’d been taught in school.

  Twenty minutes later, he stood, figuring he’d gleaned as much as he could from the report. It sounded as if nothing major was wrong with the house. It would need a new roof in the foreseeable future and there was some minor termite damage, but he was otherwise encouraged.

  As he left his kitchen, Ethan paused to frown at his living room. A short stack of cardboard boxes containing electronic equipment still sat against one of the walls, yet to be unpacked although he’d lived here for five years. A leather couch and an entertainment console holding a flat-screen TV were the room’s only furniture. In all the time he’d lived in this apartment, he’d never bothered to shop for or hang pictures on the stark white walls. The place was more impersonal than a hotel room, and definitely not the type of home he wanted.

  All his life, he’d enjoyed fixing things up and restoring them. It was a relaxing hobby, and something he looked forward to on his days off. Since he hadn’t had a place of his own to fix up, he’d focused his efforts on volunteer work. As rewarding as that was, he’d enjoy rehabbing his own property even more.

  Ethan glanced back at the paperwork on the kitchen table, considering. In the city, all he’d be able to afford was a condo. If he bought the place in Arden Hills, his commute wouldn’t be bad. Even with traffic, it shouldn’t take more than twenty minutes to get to the station. He loved living in the city, but the Craftsman in the suburbs would give him a chance to work on a property as well as a house.

  For months now, he’d been looking at houses. Apparently, so had a lot of others. Two homes he’d been interested in had been lost to bidding wars. This one was in his price range—well within—which would leave him money to fix it up.

  Deciding to make an offer, Ethan picked up his phone.

  Chapter 4

  “How’s your dad doing? I haven’t talked to him in a while.”

  Paige smiled at her boss as they sat in his office. David Nelson had been her father’s best friend for decades. Their families had been incredibly close as Paige grew up, sharing many vacations and holidays together. When David and his wife, Laura, had moved to Bennington, Paige’s parents had been disappointed. And soon afterward, when David had extended an offer for Paige to join his company, they’d been even less enthusiastic.

  “Better. Mom said he’s back at work now.”

  A hint of emotion crossed David’s face before he smiled. “That’s fantastic. I’ll have to give him a call.”

  Paige nodded, wondering if David was thinking about Laura. His wife had worked for Pinnacle Pharmaceutical, the company responsible for the drug that Paige’s father had prescribed. He’d learned about it from Laura and thought it was promising, but then tragedy had struck.

  In an effort to change the subject, Paige steered the conversation toward one of their clients. “I was thinking that we could add a simulation to the training program for Cox Wellness.”

  “A simulation?”

  David sat back in his chair and listened as Paige explained the idea that had come to her the night before. They could offer a new smartphone or another electronic prize to whoever scored the highest.

  When she’d finished, he nodded and said, “Let me know what their media rep says after you bring it up with her.”

  “I will. I’ll call Karen today.” She uncrossed her legs and gathered up her notepad, then headed for the door.

  “Paige?”

  She turned back around.

  “I’m not sure I say it often enough, but you’re doing a great job.”

  She smiled. “You do say it enough, but thank you, Uncle David.”

  Paige had never had a doubt that he appreciated her. Working for a longtime family friend had worked out well for her. From what she knew from listening to her college friends, she was lucky as far as the corporate world went.

  David’s company had always produced training videos. For years, he’d worked exclusively on airline safety videos, the kind passengers were shown on planes. Over the last few years, he’d expanded into digital media.

  When David had first approached Paige about working for Nelson Media, she’d been in desperate need of a change. Still, it had been a difficult decision. He’d relocated his company by then, and taking the job meant moving to Oregon, thousands of miles away from her parents.

  She’d debated long and hard before finally accepting his offer, but almost immediately, she’d been glad she had. She fit in well with the direction of his business, especially with her background in digital media.

  The day she’d started, David had assigned her to work with him on Cox Wellness, a client in Pennsylvania, pointing out that she could visit her family whenever she met with them. Ironically, she had yet to meet Karen, Cox Wellness’s media rep, and the others in person. Most of the interaction she had with her clients took place over the phone or by video conference. Once she’d developed a relationship with the clients, David had stepped back. Now he only oversaw what she did.

  David shook a warning finger at her. “Don’t you dare let me catch you in here this weekend.”

  Paige gave him a wry smile in answer. They both knew she’d be in the office at some point this weekend, and so would he. Since Laura had passed away from cancer last year, David had little reason to spend time at home.

  • • •

  Later that evening, when Paige was sitting with Melissa at a table at PJ’s, Melissa nodded toward the bar.

  “Tom’s looking over here again.”

  Paige glanced at the attractive bartender. A few inches taller than her five-foot-seven frame, he was fit and athletic looking, and well liked by the customers. “Why do you assume it’s me he’s looking at?”

  Melissa snorted. “Um, because I’m old enough to be his aunt? Yours too, for that matter.”

  Paige shook her head. She was twenty-four and Melissa was in her midthirties. Their age difference had never been an issue; if anything, Melissa was more like a sister than an aunt. She and Paige even looked alike. Both had dark brown hair, brown eyes, and heart-shaped faces.

  “Face it, Paige. He likes you.”

  Looking down at her drink, Paige gave it a stir with her straw. “If that’s
true, then it’s flattering.”

  “But?”

  “But I’m not interested.”

  Melissa’s voice softened. “Come on, Paige. He seems like a nice enough guy.”

  Melissa and David were the only people in Bennington who knew she’d been kidnapped. And both knew better than to press her about dating. Or so she’d thought. Shaking her head, she took a sip of her drink and changed the subject.

  Instead of going to a restaurant as they’d planned, she and Melissa ended up ordering dinner at PJ’s. An hour and a half later, Melissa set down her finished drink.

  “Ready to go?” Paige asked.

  “Yeah, I’ll just use the restroom first.” Melissa’s chair scraped the floor as she stood.

  When the server dropped off their bill, Paige took out a credit card and tucked it into the leather case. Then she pulled out her iPhone.

  “Finished with this?”

  Startled, Paige looked up from her e-mail to see that Tom had picked up the bill. “Oh, yes. It’s ready.”

  “I’ll take care of it then.”

  Paige smiled and looked back down at her phone, but Tom didn’t move away.

  He ran a hand through his close-cropped sandy-blond hair as he said, “Listen, Paige. I was wondering if I could take you out to dinner next week.”

  She blinked hard. One Friday night a few months back, Tom had casually asked what she’d had planned for the weekend. She’d told him she was working. It wasn’t a lie by any means; she worked all the time. But the last thing she wanted was to go on a date, and she’d tried to politely steer him away in case that was where he was heading.

  This time, though, there was no mistaking it. He was clearly asking her on a date. And even though she had no interest in dating him—or anyone else, for that matter—she suddenly felt bad saying no. Especially when he was smiling down at her, his expression hopeful.

  So against her better judgment, Paige said yes.

  Chapter 5

  Late on a Sunday afternoon, Ethan and Mark pulled over a black BMW sedan they’d seen weaving on the last block.

  When the driver stepped out, Ethan immediately recognized the man. He was a state senator. A few months back, the senator had given a town hall meeting at the civic center, and Ethan had been on duty at the event.

  Even as he denied having had anything to drink, the senator slurred his words. Knowing that Mark would be administering a sobriety test, Ethan took the senator’s license and stepped a few feet away. Although DUIs happened more frequently on the night shift, Ethan had seen his fair share. He knew how easily a situation could escalate.

  Pressing the button on his radio, he said, “This is three-five-one. I need a check on an Oregon license.”

  “Go ahead, three-five-one.”

  Ethan read out the number and then repeated it. Early on, he’d learned to repeat whatever he communicated to dispatch. Not only did he not trust himself to read the numbers in the right order, but he’d been in the dispatch room quite a few times. He knew how static-filled and difficult to understand transmissions could be.

  He waited while the dispatcher ran the number through the system. Less than a minute later, she was back on the line.

  “Suspect has a protective order taken out by his ex-wife. She lives at 426 Lake Street.”

  “Copy that.”

  With determined steps, Ethan walked back to where Mark and the senator stood. The address the senator was supposed to stay away from—his ex-wife’s address—was only two blocks away from there.

  “He blew a one point five,” Mark said.

  Ethan shook his head; that was nearly double the legal limit of zero point eight. As Mark put the senator in handcuffs, the senator became belligerent.

  “I’m going to have both of your badges!”

  Ethan stepped in front of the man. “Where were you headed tonight, sir?”

  The senator’s face turned a shade of crimson. “Home, all right? I was headed home!”

  Ethan doubted that. Then again, the protective order hadn’t been violated. What they did have him on—without any doubt—was a DUI. The senator continued making threats while Mark read his rights and put him into the patrol car.

  By the time the senator’s car had been impounded and they’d brought him down to lockup, Ethan and Mark’s shift had been over for half an hour. They walked into the station and Ethan sat down at an empty desk.

  Twenty minutes later, he was still staring at the screen in front of him. The words he’d written were a familiar jumble, and he could feel a pounding in the back of his head. Reading and writing were difficult enough without the added pressure of a potentially sticky situation. This report was going to get a lot of attention, and needed to be perfect.

  There were police departments across the country where officers dictated their reports, without the need to write a single word. In some agencies, officers even called in reports. Neither was the case in Bennington, where a limited budget necessitated doing reports the old-fashioned way.

  While Ethan’s dyslexia hadn’t ruled out any jobs, it certainly added a challenge to daily life. Being an officer required a great deal of writing. When Ethan wasn’t on patrol, he was writing reports. And a report on a high-profile person like this created additional pressure.

  As a rookie, he’d been sure his reports were going to get kicked back. With Jonathan’s help, though, all of his reports had been accepted. No one in the DA’s office had ever complained.

  It had been third grade before he’d been tested for dyslexia. Before that, his teachers had thought it was just taking him longer to learn to read. Over time and with help, he’d learned to compensate on the reading. He was able to get the gist of things, even though the words often jumbled, and the sentences morphed into a single long word.

  What was especially hard was writing—getting the words down to the point where they were accurate and professional looking, and in the right order. At times it felt impossible.

  Ethan had never considered college and was only too happy to get into a profession where he wasn’t at a desk all day. But he hadn’t realized how much writing police work required. It wasn’t as if he was the only one who dreaded that aspect of the job; many of his fellow officers did. At the end of the day, though, things took him longer.

  He glanced at Mark who was seated a few desks away. While the thought of sharing this shouldn’t be embarrassing, it wasn’t anything Ethan was eager to do. Let them get to know each other a little better first.

  At any rate, what he had down was nearly finished. He just needed another pair of eyes. He looked to the captain’s office and saw that the lights were still on. Standing, he headed over.

  Chapter 6

  The following Wednesday was Tom’s night off, and Paige had agreed to meet him at a restaurant by the lake. The restaurant Tom had chosen was an elegant one. It was obvious he’d put some thought into planning their date, which made Paige feel guilty. For the past week, she’d been second-guessing having agreed to this date. And now that she and Tom had been seated together for the last hour, things were no better.

  What she didn’t understand was why. There was no question that Tom was attractive. Other women certainly found him appealing, which was evident by the interested glances their waitress had been giving him all through dinner. And Tom was interesting and funny; the stories he’d been telling her about the bar were entertaining. But she just didn’t feel anything.

  And that was the heart of the problem. Her first date in a couple of years, and she still felt dead inside. Ever since the kidnapping, it was as if a part of her—the happy-go-lucky part—had vanished. What remained was an anxious woman. The times she didn’t feel nervous, she felt numb. Her self-defense mechanism after the kidnapping had been to shut down her emotions, numbing herself to the anxiety provoked by the memories. But turning those emotions back on was more difficult than she’d imagined, and when they did slip through, it was often with unintended consequences. Like p
anic attacks.

  Yes, she functioned well at work. She did her job and even enjoyed it. But having a relationship was more than she felt equipped to handle. And it was unfair to Tom to prolong this any further.

  When the waitress finally dropped off their bill, Paige felt a sense of relief. As they walked to her car a few minutes later, Tom asked if she’d like to see a local band that was playing that night.

  Paige stopped at her car and turned to him, avoiding his eyes as she dug in her purse for her keys. “I’m sorry,” she murmured, “but I need to get home.”

  “What about next week?” he asked, but she shook her head.

  “I have a project due at work, so I’ll be working late most nights.” An excuse, but one she hoped he’d accept.

  Tom frowned at her words. “I thought we had a good time tonight.”

  “We did. I just . . .” God, did she really have to do this now? She swallowed hard.

  Yes, she did. Tom was a nice guy who deserved the truth. She needed to be straight with him, and better now rather than later over the phone or by text.

  “I’m sorry,” she said. “I should never have agreed to go out on a date—with you or anyone else.”

  When he didn’t say anything, it became clear he was waiting for an additional explanation. With no intention of sharing details about her past, her mind spun as she tried to find the right words to let him down gently.

  Unable to come up with something better, Paige clutched her keys tightly and looked up into his eyes. “It’s just where I am.”

  “Where you are,” he repeated, his brows drawing together as he stared down at her.

  She bit her lip and nodded.

  Tom stood there for a few more seconds until he finally gave a snort. Then he turned and walked away. By the time Paige had started her SUV, his car was already roaring out of the parking lot.

  Chapter 7

  The smell of stale beer hit Ethan when he opened the door to the dimly lit bar. He paused for a moment, giving his eyes time to adjust, then spotted his buddy James with his fiancée, and headed over. James and Denise had just gotten engaged, and a group of their friends and coworkers had been invited out to Tony’s Bar and Grille to celebrate.