Looking down the aisle, he didn't see Jordan either. They had to be running late. If they didn't get on the bus soon, they'd learn the hard way that Stan didn't wait for anyone. It was a fact Jude learned plenty of times on tour with Silverlight.
As he settled into his seat, he heard loud voices he didn't recognize boarding the bus. Ross and Mark threw their duffel bags on a couple of seats. The men were interchangeable with their college boy, clean-cut look. Both wore jeans and striped polos, the only difference being that Ross's was sky blue while Mark's was pale green.
Jude saw guys like them around all the female musicians. He never liked it. To him, male and female fans were completely different. The women seemed to genuinely care about the band and musician they were following. The guy groupies were looking for something different.
They wanted more than just a sexual relationship, they wanted a piece of the pie. He'd seen it too many times before. The male followers wanted a little bit of that stardom for themselves.
He didn't trust Ross and Mark. Jude recognized weasels when he saw them. He only wished he could say something to protect Lucky without appearing jealous. Then again, why couldn't he? He was Jude Morrison. He could do whatever the hell he wanted.
"Get off the bus," he growled at them as he approached.
"Hey Jude! Dude, I've been dying to meet you," Ross said.
"Get. Off. The. Bus."
"Jude dude, relax. Lucky invited us. She wants us here."
"I'll make this easy on you. Leave now and never bother her again, or I will personally throw you off the bus myself."
"Hey guys!" Kat said as she entered the bus. "So glad you could make it."
Jude felt his anger burn even more. Grabbing Kat by the arm, he pulled her out of earshot from Ross and Mark.
"You should know better. I know Olivia wouldn't have invited those pricks along unless someone else pushed her to."
"Olivia? Oh, you mean Lucky. I think those loud drums have done something to your brain. She wants them here. It was her idea. I think she's into Ross. Can you blame her? He’s dreamy and he's always ready for a good time."
"Stay away from her," Jude said. "She's dealing with enough right now. She doesn't need a bad influence."
"What are you talking about? I'm a great influence. She's a big girl, Jude. I didn't realize you were here to babysit her."
Kat walked away and sat near Ross and his friend before Jude could say anything else. Furious, Jude sat in his seat quietly growling as he wondered how he could protect Lucky from whatever those guys had in store for her. His only choice was to convince her to send them home.
Once Lucky and Jordan arrived, he kept his eye on Lucky. Her long light brown hair was loose and wild except for two braids like a crown on her head. She spoke excitedly to Jordan and he wondered if it was about him. He hoped it was.
He had to stop that. He had a bad habit of falling in love on tour. Sometimes every single night. He couldn't help it. He loved women. If he had to list his vices, women definitely topped the list. He simply couldn't resist them. There were a lot of reasons why he needed to stay away from Lucky, and not knowing whether he was falling into his old habits was one of them.
Dylan, alone with Jordan's attention being held by Lucky, sauntered towards the back of the bus. Jude remembered being that young and on tour. Dylan reminded him a lot of himself.
"Hey man, can I join you?" Dylan asked.
"Sure, I don't own these seats. Sit wherever you like."
"Thanks. Listen, I just wanted to say it’s amazing to play with you. Like dream come true amazing," Dylan said.
"Well, I have to admit I'm having a good time. I didn't expect to."
"Why are you here? I mean it’s awesome for us, but what do you get out of it?"
"Freedom," Jude said. "Whatever you decide to do, either stay as a touring musician or join a band, make sure you always have an out."
"Is that why you left Silverlight?"
"Yes and no," Jude said with a shrug. "Silverlight was great. We were the biggest band in the world, who wouldn't love that? But the band didn't work right anymore. Was I to blame for their split? Yeah, in a way. But only because I didn't have the freedom to do what I wanted to. A lot of factors were at play."
Plenty of people called those factors many things--ego, stupidity, ambition. Jude called them Donna. Just thinking about her was enough for him to rebuild the wall around his heart.
"I'm still trying to figure out what I want," Dylan said. "I thought I'd keep touring until I found the right band. Every band I've been in, we just ended up fighting."
"That's how bands are. Eventually everyone thinks they're right."
"I've been touring non-stop since I was eighteen," Dylan said. "I didn't have a choice, I didn't have a place to live. My dad split when I was little. After that, Mom starting going out to parties and clubs. She'd leave me home alone and I'd take care of her. By the time I was eight, I was cooking, cleaning, and doing laundry."
Jude listened, not wanting to interrupt Dylan, but he wondered if family dysfunction was a prerequisite for a music career.
"My mom made some new friends and suddenly she was drinking more and doing drugs," Dylan said. "We lived in an old apartment development. You know the kind, the red brick buildings that faced a common court."
Jude nodded then stole a glance at Lucky, who was scribbling in her notebook. They had so much in common, but he knew he couldn't open up to her. It wasn't right, she needed time on her own. She needed to live.
"One of our neighbors realized how often I was alone and called Family Services," Dylan said. "I know he thought he was doing the right thing, but after that I spent my life in and out of foster care, moving whenever my mom got custody back and changing schools. I ended up with no friends, nothing.
"The only consistent thing was my music," Dylan said. "My dad had been a musician and when he left, he left behind one of his guitars. I always thought it was his way of giving me something. Of making sure I had something in my life. Maybe even a future.
"I taught myself how to play and when I turned eighteen and was on my own, I went to every audition I could find. I'd sleep on people's couches, stay the night in a shelter, I didn't care. I wanted to call the road my home."
"How'd you get into bass?" Jude asked.
"Less competition. Everybody wants to be a guitarist and get noticed. Not many appreciate the bottom end. So for three years now I've been touring. It's great. I have no complaints. But..."
"But what?"
"But Jordan," Dylan said, lowering his voice. He leaned into the aisle to get a glimpse of her as she took random photos. "She's it, man. She's the one. I knew it when I first set eyes on her. And now she's thinking of moving to LA, and I want to get off the road. I just want to be with her."
"Then what's the problem?"
"That wasn't the plan. I know I can get studio work, and maybe she can come on the road sometimes, but the fact that I'm thinking of all of this right now scares me."
"Don't think about it then," Jude said. "Sometimes you should listen to your heart and not your head."
Even as the words came out of his mouth, Jude recognized the irony. It had been a long time since his heart beat the way it did for Lucky. Then again, it had been a long time since he had been on tour.
As Lucky stood up and stretched by her seat, Jude found himself following the hem of her shirt, wishing it was shorter and he'd get a small flash of skin. He thought about how soft her skin was, how good it felt to hold her so close. Closing his eyes for a moment, he smelled the coconut of her shampoo.
"Jude!"
"What? Oh sorry, Dylan, I thought you were done. I didn't get much sleep last night."
"Oh yeah? Wild night? I've seen you leaving with some pretty hot chicks after the shows."
"Yeah, the one last night was the hottest. I could get used to waking up to her every morning," Jude said as he thought about Lucky.
"You don't get tired of it
?"
"Nah, it’s the lifestyle. It’s why we're in rock ‘n’ roll, right?"
Jude was tired of the same old line and he realized he was becoming less convincing, too. Unfortunately, it was a role he felt he had to play. He didn't want the world to know about his personal life, that was messed up enough as it was. It was easier to play the dog, as a lot of women called him, than to risk the truth making the news.
"Gimme a break, Jude," Dylan said, shaking his head. "You think we're blind? You think none of us see how you look at her? You keep saying you don't want to be here, but you sit in the back of the bus instead of hiding away in that room. I bet you sit back here so you can watch her without being too obvious."
"You don't know what you're talking about."
"I don't? I didn't come back here to whine about my life story. I came back here because I know you're going through the same thing." Dylan shifted a little in his seat to get a better look at Jordan. "And also because Jordan was busy talking to Lucky and this was the best place I could find to stare at her without looking like a fucking stalker."
He grinned at Jude, who started laughing. "Then welcome to stalker central," Jude said. "But let’s keep this between us."
Jude hadn't been on the road since Silverlight and hoped he would never return. There were too many women in the world and it seemed like every time one walked past, he found someone new to love.
He couldn't do that to Lucky. If there was ever going to be something between them, he needed to be sure he wasn't just looking for a warm body. He needed to listen to something other than his dick. Besides, she was young.
It wasn't her age, they were less than ten years apart. But Lucky was so sheltered and naive, he didn't want her to wake up one day and realize she missed out on life. She would resent him for that, he knew he would if it was him. His heart had been broken enough times. He didn't want to go through that pain again.
He had no choice but to keep Lucky at a distance. Even if that distance kept shrinking.
13
Lucky
Lucky quickly forgot about running for the bus once her eyes met Jude's as she slid into the seat next to Jordan. She grinned as she thought about peeking down the aisle at him but didn't want to embarrass herself in case he was looking. As Jordan made herself comfortable, she pulled out her camera and showed Lucky some shots she took of last night's show.
"You gonna tell me about you and Dylan or do I need to drag it out of you?" Lucky said.
"We made up, not much more to say," Jordan said then looked away.
"You're blushing! Mark this day folks, Jordan Blake actually blushes."
"Shut up!" Jordan hissed.
"I want details. I deserve to know. I spoke to him after I left you, you know."
"Yes, I know. He said he was just trying to make me jealous because I hurt him. He thought I didn't care about him. I guess what Jude said is true, things aren't always the way they appear."
"Wait, when did you talk to Jude?" Lucky asked.
"Last night, after the show while you were changing."
"What did he say? I mean how did that happen?"
"He wanted to talk to me about Dylan, that's all. I guess he felt bad for me," Jordan said with a shrug. "I must’ve looked pathetic."
"I can't believe he spoke to you," Lucky said, her brow wrinkling.
She wanted to say more and tell Jordan about what happened with Jude, but she wasn't sure what to say. She had so many questions about last night. Why was he alone? Why didn't he kiss her? But she couldn't ask. It was time for her to grow up and stop obsessing over childish questions.
Dylan had been at the back of the bus for a while with Jude. She wanted to get a glimpse of Jude, see his tattoos peeking out of his shirt, his choppy hair perfect in an unobvious way. As she tried to think of a way to get a peek, she realized she couldn't without risking being caught, but why should she care? Tired of acting so stupid around him all the time, she summoned her courage and went to the back of the bus hoping no one else could hear the loud thumping of her heart.
"Hey, there's my lucky girl," Ross said.
Forgetting that Ross and Mark were on the bus, Lucky ignored the comment, not thinking it was for her. Suddenly his hand closed around her arm, stopping her and forcing her to look at him.
"Oh Ross, I'm sorry, hi. I need to--" Lucky stammered, feeling uncomfortable.
"Jeez, now that you have me all to yourself, you're ignoring me?" Ross said.
Did I ever pay much attention to you to begin with? she thought. Unsure how to answer, she laughed and hoped he would let her go. Looking towards the back of the bus, she thought Jude looked angry.
"No, I just need to talk to Jude," she said as she tried to pull her arm away.
"You're not telling me something," Ross said. "I came all this way for you, followed you on your tour. You're into him, aren't you?"
"He's in my band and we need to talk about the set list. You wanted to come on the bus, I never invited you," she said. Her anger grew and bubbled over the longer he held onto her arm. "Now let go of me before I tell Stan you shouldn't be here."
"Everything okay, Lucky?" Stan asked with a serious look in his eye as he peered through the rearview mirror at them.
She yanked her arm away from Ross. "Everything's fine Stan, thank you," she said.
Breathing a sigh of relief, her anger quickly left her and she felt calm and at ease for the first time. Her shoulders felt lighter and she pushed them back, feeling proud of standing up for herself as she walked the rest of the way up the aisle.
"Hey Olivia, glad you came back here. I wanted to talk to you," Jude said.
She still couldn't believe he was calling her Olivia. Even Jordan didn't call her that, and she knew she didn't care for Lucky. Olivia felt like a foreign name to her since no one used it, but she loved hearing his deep, husky voice when he said it. He made her name feel like something that only her and Jude shared.
"Since you're back here, I'm going to sit with my girl," Dylan said as he stood up. "See you guys later."
"You wanted to talk to me?" Lucky said as she watched Dylan slide into the seat next to Jordan.
"Yeah, about those guys," Jude said, nodding towards Ross and his friend. "Take a seat."
"You saw that?" she asked, feeling embarrassed.
"I wanted to talk to you about them before something like that happened. They shouldn't be on the bus."
"And I'm sure you never brought groupies along on your tour bus."
"It's different."
"How? Because I'm a girl? Are you saying that because I'm a girl I shouldn't have any fun? Maybe I should just stay at home and wait for Prince Charming while knitting a sweater."
Lucky couldn't help but think about how her parents sheltered her. She knew things would have been different if she was a boy, and it made her more sensitive.
"No, that's not what I meant," Jude said.
"Then what?"
"They're just bad news, okay? I've seen guys like that. They're parasites."
"Well, they're my friends."
"Didn't look like that," he said.
"Well…I..."
She didn't know what to say, but she didn't like that he was trying to control what she did. In her mind, if she was a guy, Jude would've patted her on the back or given her a high five, not scolded her.
"Just be careful, Liv."
He got up and disappeared through the back door into the bedroom. She almost followed him in, ready to argue some more, but she didn't know what she was fighting about. Having Ross and Mark on the bus was the last thing she wanted. Lucky had to get them off the bus. How Ross treated her before was reason enough, she just didn't know how to do it.
The sun was setting as the bus turned towards their hotel in Dallas. Surprised to see a bellhop standing outside in uniform, she wondered if they were at the right place.
"Stan, is this right?" Lucky whispered over Stan's shoulder as the bus hissed to a stop.
"Home?" She turned around and looked down the rows of seats as she tried to see if anyone looked more excited than usual. "Who's from Dallas?"
"Me, and I'm happy to be back. I think depending on the route, I might be from Chicago next time. Really nice hotels there." Stan winked at her as he opened the bus door.
Entering the hotel through the powered revolving door, Lucky couldn't believe how large and glamorous it was. She never traveled much before since her parents didn't have a lot of money, so she wasn't used to seeing this kind of elegance.
The lobby was several stories high with glistening white marble floors, tall columns, and huge crystal chandeliers. In one corner, a black baby grand piano sat in the middle of a lounge with several thickly upholstered chairs.
As Ross and Mark entered the hotel, Mark let out a low whistle. Kat bumped into Lucky as she came through the revolving door.
"Oops, sorry Lucky, you're supposed to keep walking after you exit the doors," Kat said sarcastically.
Lucky looked at her in surprise. She couldn't believe Kat would talk to her that way. Before she could say anything back, Kat had caught up to Ross and Mark as they headed to the bar.
"Fine, they're on the bus, but they're not staying here, are they?" Jordan asked, looping her arm through Lucky's to move her out of the way.
"No, no way. I really don't know what they're doing here, but I didn't think about that when I let them come on the bus. The label isn't paying for them, and I sure as hell won't let them in our room."
"Umm…about our room," Jordan said as she looked away. "Well, this is only if you're okay with it, but I was thinking of spending the night with Dylan. It's just…geez Lucky, look at this place. We'd never be able to afford anything like this on our own and well..."
"You don't have to tell me, I get it," Lucky said with a smile.
Hearing the sound of Jude's boots thudding on the marble floor echo throughout the lobby, she turned to watch him walk by. The muscles on his one arm bulged as he carried his duffel bag past them. Just like every time she saw him, her heart skipped a beat.
Lucky: A Rockstar Romance Two Book Boxed Set Page 9
