But what if I did want more?
Me: Benjamin?
Ben: Yes?
Me: You’re desirable, too. In fact, I think you might be the sexiest man I’ve ever seen.
Ben: I’m a little bit speechless.
Me: You are. So sexy. So handsome and strong. Can I tell you something else?
Ben: Oh my darling, please do.
Me: I imagine it sometimes… what it would feel like to kiss you.
Ben: Tell me.
Me: I imagine the way your beard would feel on my face. And what it would be like to have your arms around me. Your hands touching me.
Ben: Believe me, I’ve imagined the same things. And more.
Me: I’ve imagined more, too. Is this really happening? Are we…?
Ben: Yes. How does that make you feel?
I took a few breaths of the cool night air. My cheeks were warm, my body lighting up in ways I hadn’t experienced in a long time. How did this make me feel?
Me: Honestly? A little bit scared.
Ben: That’s okay. We don’t have to rush. But the next time I see you, I am going to kiss you.
I thought about telling him to come over and kiss me now. But I stopped before I typed the words. I did want Ben’s kiss—and so much more. But it was easy to imagine while I sat here alone in the dark. It was quite another thing to invite him here in the middle of the night.
I wasn’t sure I was ready for that. Not because I was innocent or naive. I had different reasons for hesitating—reasons that were no less real.
It felt like opening a book I’d thought I’d lost long ago. Still familiar, but I needed to keep turning the pages to reacquaint myself with the story before I was ready for the climax.
Me: If you do, maybe I’ll kiss you back.
Ben: Maybe? Not sure about those odds, but I’ll have to take my chances.
Me: You never know until you try.
Ben: Isn’t that the truth.
Me: It’s getting late. I should probably go to bed.
Ben: Me, too.
Me: Goodnight, Benjamin. I’ll see you tomorrow.
Ben: Goodnight, beautiful. You most certainly will.
Nine
Ben
I wasn’t sure if a weekend was long enough to bring Shannon around to the idea of dating. But by Monday morning—and especially after texting with her last night—my ability to hold back was at its breaking point. I still had another little surprise up my sleeve—and it was important that I give it to her. But I’d been a very patient man for a long time. Come what may, I was going to make my move. Today.
I drove down to Salishan early, so I’d be sure to see her before the day got away from both of us. But the first time I caught sight of her, she was in one of the utility vehicles with Cooper, about to head to the vineyards. Our eyes met and she smiled. I couldn’t be sure from this distance, but she might have even blushed.
Yep. I was going for it. I just needed a chance to get her alone.
I still had work to do, so I filled my morning with tasks that needed doing. She and Cooper came back around noon, but he followed her into the Big House. A few minutes later, Leo called, asking if I could help him test the security system.
These boys really needed to get out of my way.
It was mid-afternoon before I made my way back to the Big House. I found Shannon in the main tasting room chatting with a few guests. Her hair was down today—she usually wore it back—and she was dressed in a dark blue shirt and beige pants.
Beautiful, as always.
Leaning one shoulder against the doorway, I met her eyes. Her face lit up with a smile and she held up a finger, asking me to wait.
Don’t worry, Shannon. I’ve been waiting a long time for this. A few more minutes won’t matter.
She finished talking to the guests and tucked her hair behind her ear as she walked over.
“Hi,” she said, her voice soft.
With very few exceptions, I’d always stopped myself from touching her, no matter how strong the urge. Not today. I reached out and brushed her hair back behind her shoulder.
“Hi. You look beautiful today.”
Her lips only twitched, but her smile lit up her eyes. “Thank you.”
“Do you have a minute?”
She glanced over her shoulder. Brynn smiled at us from behind the bar.
“Sure,” she said.
I loved this woman’s kids as much as I loved her, but they were really cramping my style lately. I nodded to Brynn, then gently took Shannon’s elbow.
She let me lead her into the hallway. Lindsey was at the front desk. That was no good. I heard noise coming from the kitchen. That wouldn’t work. I didn’t bother with the event room. People were always coming and going in there.
I pulled her down the hall and into the storeroom next to the kitchen.
“What are we—”
Instead of letting her finish her question—or answering it—I shut the door with my foot, pushed her up against the wall, and kissed her.
Finally. Oh my god, finally.
Bracing myself with one hand on the wall, I twined my fingers through her silky hair as her mouth softened against mine. I pressed my lips to hers, letting us both sink into the kiss. Felt her body relax.
With a soft exhale, she slid her hands around my waist, drawing me closer. I sucked on her lower lip, savoring my first taste of her. She was everything I’d imagined she’d be. Smooth and delicate. Delicious.
She parted her lips and I felt the tip of her tongue. A low growl rumbled in my throat as I delved into her mouth, letting my tongue slide against hers. She tilted her head and her hands moved up my chest. I craved her touch like a man starved. Her fingers found skin as she drew her hands around to the back of my neck.
All I could think was more. I needed more of her. More contact. More of her taste. I picked her up, pressing her back to the wall. Her legs hooked around my waist. Holding her ass in my hands, I kept kissing her. Deep and hungry. Long drags of my tongue against hers.
I’d meant to kiss her softly. Be a gentleman. But there was nothing gentlemanly about the way I was growling into her mouth. Squeezing her ass in my hands. There were decades of pent-up desire in this kiss, and I was done keeping it all inside.
I felt it in her, too. She kissed me back, just as passionately. Her arms wound tight around me, her fingers sliding through my hair.
Losing all sense of time, I kept kissing her. Reveled in this moment. I’d waited so damn long for this. Imagined it so many times. And the reality of kissing Shannon was better than anything I’d dare let myself dream.
This woman was everything.
In the back of my mind, I was aware of footsteps in the hallway outside. But I didn’t care. The threat of interruption wasn’t enough to make me stop. Not when I finally had her. When I could touch her and taste her lips. Kissing her was bliss.
Besides, I’d promised to kiss her breathless. And I was nothing if not a man of my word.
We made out in the storeroom for goodness knew how long. I wasn’t exactly a young man anymore, but I was strong—holding her up was easy. And feeling her pressed against the wall with her legs around me was unbelievable.
Finally, I pulled away, just a little. Rested my forehead against hers. She was breathing hard, her arms still holding me tight. I let her legs down, slowly lowering her to the floor.
Her hands moved back to my chest and I kept my forehead to hers. Let us both catch our breath.
“You weren’t kidding when you said you’d kiss me,” she said, her voice soft.
I brushed her hair back from her face. “I always keep my promises.”
“What happens now?”
That was a very good question. There was a part of me—a very insistent part—that wanted to drag her home right now and make love to her. But I knew she wasn’t quite ready for that. Soon. But not yet.
“Will you have dinner with me?”
There was a hint of relief in
her smile. “Yes, I’d love that.”
“Are you free tonight?”
“I am.”
“Can I pick you up at seven?”
She nodded. “Seven is good.”
“Then it’s a date.”
Her eyes moved to my mouth and she slid one hand up to trace her fingers through my beard. I leaned in to kiss her again—gently this time.
“I suppose I have to let you get back to work,” I said.
“Yeah, I suppose so. And I have to get ready. I have a date tonight.”
“A date? He’s a lucky man.”
Her soft laugh was music to my ears. “I’m a lucky woman.”
“It’s about time, don’t you think?”
“About time we get lucky?” she asked.
I groaned. “Dear god, Shannon, don’t start talking like that. We’re at work. You’re going to get me in trouble.”
She laughed again, then nibbled on her bottom lip while she touched my beard again. “I’ll see you at seven.”
“I’ll be there.”
She slipped out the storeroom door, glancing back at me over her shoulder before she left. I turned and leaned against the wall. Closed my eyes and let out a long breath.
God, that woman.
Tonight, I was going to give her the best date of her life.
Ten
Shannon
It was mid-afternoon, but I didn’t bother going back to work. I needed a little time to collect myself, so I went straight home.
The memory of Ben’s kiss was still hot on my lips. He hadn’t just kissed me. He’d consumed me. Never in my life had I been kissed like that. It had been thrilling and arousing. New and familiar all at once. It was Benjamin. My friend. The man who’d been a presence in my life for so long.
But this was a side of Ben I’d never known. A side of him I hadn’t dared hope to experience.
And now, for the first time in a very long time, I had a date.
I decided to calm my nerves with a glass of wine and a hot bath. I soaked for a while, luxuriating in the water and the memory of Ben’s beard against my skin. His lips on mine. It had felt better than I’d imagined.
And I realized how much I’d been missing that. The feeling of someone wanting me. Kissing and touching and connecting. I’d been missing intimacy for so long—since well before my marriage had ended. And the prospect of discovering it again was both exciting and a little scary.
After my bath, I dried off and slipped on my robe. I needed to decide what to wear tonight, so I stood in front of my closet, scrutinizing my choices.
I heard a knock downstairs, followed closely by someone calling my name.
“Shannon? You home?”
What was Zoe doing here?
“Upstairs,” I called out.
I hoped she didn’t need a babysitter. I was usually more than happy to watch Hudson, but tonight was another story.
“Oh good, you’re getting ready,” she said as she peeked through my partially-open door.
“What?”
Zoe came in, followed closely by Hannah and Amelia. Zoe had a garment bag hanging on her arm. Hannah had a small tote with a curling iron sticking out the top and Amelia carried an armful of makeup bags.
“What are you all doing here?” I asked.
“We’re here to help you get ready for your date,” Amelia said, her voice matter-of-fact.
“Help me… wait, how did you know I have a date?”
“Cooper saw you come out of the storeroom in the Big House and he said you looked all dreamy and weird and you walked right by him without saying anything,” Amelia said. “And then a minute later he saw Ben come out of the storeroom, so he figured you two were in there together, which must mean, you know. So he asked Ben, and Ben said he was taking you out on a date tonight.”
I shook my head. “If there’s a downside to a family business, it’s this.”
Zoe lifted her eyebrows and set the garment bag on my bed. “Wow, Shannon. Getting freaky in the Big House? I’m impressed.”
“We didn’t get freaky,” I said. “We just… kissed.”
They all gasped at once.
“He kissed you?”
“It finally happened?”
“Go, Ben.”
I held up my hands. “Okay, yes, he kissed me. And he asked me to dinner.”
“This is so romantic,” Hannah said. She swiped beneath her eyes and sniffed. “Sorry, I’m just a little emotional right now.”
“And Ben asking you to dinner leads us full circle,” Zoe said. “Let’s get you date-ready.”
“You’re not going to try to get me to wax, are you?” I asked.
Zoe waved a hand. “No, it’s too late for that. You need to give the skin a good twenty-four hours after waxing before someone gets in your lady bits.”
“I’m going to dinner, Zoe. It doesn’t have anything to do with my lady bits.”
“Sure.” Zoe’s tone left little doubt that she really meant yeah right.
I shook my head. There was no point in arguing with her.
“You did shave your legs, though, right?” Amelia asked. “Just in case, I mean. It’s always good to be prepared. Cooper’s always saying that Ben taught him that, and I think it’s a good lesson. And Ben burned his mattress already, so we all know what that means. Plus, smooth legs feel nice.”
“Hold on,” I said. “What did you say about Ben’s mattress? He burned it?”
“Yeah, not that long ago,” Amelia said. “I missed that one, which is such a bummer because the only time I got to go to a mattress burning was Leo’s. And I don’t know who else is going to do it, now. Maybe Grace will, I guess, but it seems like that might be stretching things, since she lives a little farther away. Man, if I’d known that was going to be my one and only mattress burning, I would have taken some pictures.”
Mattress burning was probably not a normal activity in most families. But this was the Miles family. My kids had burned mine first, after I’d kicked out my ex. Since then, it had become a symbol of casting off your old life, particularly when you were ready to move into a committed relationship.
But Ben had burned his mattress before we’d even been on a date? That meant two things, as far as I could tell. One, he wanted more than one date with me—perhaps more than just dating. And two, he was ready to welcome me into his bed.
A few days ago, that would have scared me. But everything was changing.
“You girls are so sweet to come over, but I’m fine,” I said. “I’m sure I have something I can wear.”
“Did you pick something already?” Hannah asked. “Can we see?”
I pulled a peach floral maxi dress out of my closet. “This is nice. And I’ve only worn it a few times.”
“Nope,” Zoe said.
“Why not?”
“Is he taking you to an Easter brunch?” she asked.
Amelia snickered and Hannah put her hand over her mouth.
“Come on, Shannon,” Zoe said. “This is a date. With Ben. This is a big night and you deserve to look like the foxy mama you are.”
“What do you suggest?” I asked, gesturing to my open closet.
“Keep an open mind.” Zoe unzipped the garment bag, revealing black fabric inside. “I bought this a month or so ago, but I’ve never worn it. And I think it would look amazing on you.”
She held up a sleeveless black dress. It had a V-neck that would dip far too low and a skirt that was far too short. It was gorgeous, but…
“I can’t wear that,” I said. “It’s beautiful, but no. I couldn’t.”
“Just try it on,” Zoe said, pushing it toward me.
“You really should,” Amelia said. “It would be so pretty on you.”
“I agree,” Hannah said. “At least give it a try.”
I took the dress from Zoe and held it out. It wasn’t something I’d have picked for myself. But it did look like a date dress. And that’s what this was. A date. So why not? I wasn’t positi
ve it would fit, but it wouldn’t hurt to try it on.
I slipped the dress on and Zoe helped me zip it up in back. Running my hands down my hips, I smoothed it down, then turned so the girls could see.
“Holy shit, Shannon,” Zoe said. “You’re smoking hot in that thing.”
“Yeah,” Amelia said, her voice awed. “It’s perfect.”
Hannah sniffed and wiped her eyes. “I agree. Sorry, I don’t know why I keep crying over everything lately.”
“That would be pregnancy,” Zoe said. “Shannon, I’m serious. You’re stunning. Go look.”
I moved to stand in front of my full-length mirror. I almost didn’t recognize the woman looking back at me. My hair was still up in a bun from taking a bath, leaving my neck bare. The V-shaped neckline dipped down provocatively, and the fabric hugged my waist and hips. It was short, but not uncomfortably so, coming almost to my knees.
“Wow,” I whispered.
“God, I can’t wait for him to see you in this,” Zoe said.
There was another knock on the door downstairs and all four of us gasped.
“He’s not here yet, is he?” Amelia asked.
Hannah made for the bedroom door. “I’ll stall him while you guys do makeup.”
“Mom?” Brynn’s voice called out from downstairs.
“Up here, Brynn,” Zoe said.
I let out a breath as my daughter walked in.
She stopped in the doorway and set something down, her eyes widening. “Mom? Holy crap, look at you.”
“She has a date with Ben,” Amelia said.
Brynn’s eyes grew even larger and she opened her mouth like she was going to say something. But nothing came out.
For a second, my heart sank. My kids all loved Ben, there was no question about that. But what if they didn’t love the idea of me being with him?
“Brynn—”
“I’m so excited and happy and I almost don’t know what to say so I guess I’m just going to wind up rambling like Amelia. This is so amazing, I can’t even…” She paused and took a breath. “You really have a date with Ben? Are you serious? Tonight?”
Gaining Miles: A Miles Family Novella (The Miles Family Book 5) Page 6
