Forsaken (Vampire Awakenings, Book 10)

by Brenda K. Davies

  “It is an original,” she said.

  “I agree.”

  “Would you like to see more of the artist’s works?”

  “If you’re going to show them to me.”

  Aida forced herself to smile; this was her job, and she usually loved talking with people, but she wouldn’t like it if Julian was talking with some woman who was openly flirting with him. However, she didn’t have much choice. She would have to make it clear she wasn’t interested without annoying him.

  “Of course I will,” she said.

  He smiled as he extended his hand to her. “I’m Gerald.”

  His hand was warm and firm when she clasped it. “I’m Aida. Please, come with me.”

  As she led him around the gallery, she answered any questions he had as they strolled from one painting to the next. He didn’t try to flirt with her again, and as they walked, she found she enjoyed his questions and comments. Many of them were probing and insightful.

  They were halfway down the last hallway when a waiter approached her with a problem. “I’ll be right there,” Aida told him.

  The waiter nodded and hurried away. “I have to take care of this,” she said to Gerald.

  When she started to turn away, he rested his hand on her arm to halt her. Aida’s first instinct was to deck him, but she somehow kept her hand from flying. He didn’t seem to realize this as his smile remained in place and his eyes twinkled.

  “Would you like to grab dinner with me after this?” he asked.

  Taking a deep breath, she made herself relax. He wasn’t going to toss her over his shoulder and kidnap her. He was just looking for a date, which was something she’d experienced a hundred times before.

  “Thank you,” she said with a smile. “But I’m seeing someone.”

  “Ah.” He released her arm and smiled ruefully. “He’s a lucky man.”

  “He is,” she agreed, and Gerald chuckled.

  She slipped away from him and rushed to help the caterers. An hour later, she spotted Gerald speaking with Nicolette and Owen before losing sight of him. It was almost eight o’clock when the door opened again and Julian stepped inside.

  Aida couldn’t help grinning like a fool; she felt like a kid all over again as her heart fluttered in her chest, and she had to restrain herself from running into his arms. He looked better than chocolate cake in jeans and a black shirt that emphasized the startling blue of his eyes.

  Her body reacted as if his hands were already on it, his beard scraping her skin as she tasted his salty flesh. She tried to clear her head of the erotic images filling it as she strode over to him. Resting her hand on his arm, she led him into a shadowed corner of the gallery.

  “I know I shouldn’t be here, but I wanted to say hi,” he said.

  “I’m glad you’re here.” She rose on her toes to give him a quick kiss. Nicolette was probably fuming, but her wrath was worth seeing him again. “Did you get your laundry done?”

  “I did.” He hated every second of being away from her and worried about her the entire time, but he couldn’t hang out at her work. “I have this for you.”

  When he held his hand out to her, Aida couldn’t make out the white thing he held until he lifted it before her. Aida’s mouth parted, and then her heart swelled with love when he revealed the origami swan he held.

  Laughing, Aida took it from him and cradled it carefully in her hand. After one of the many times she fled her house after a nightmare, Julian brought her a swan just like this. At first, it was one of the nights where she couldn’t talk, but when he handed her the swan, something inside her broke.

  The tears streaking her face were no longer ones of anguish, but joy. At the time, everything seemed so bleak to her, but somehow the swan became a beacon of hope in her damaged world.

  It was the first time she told him some of what happened to her in the basement; the first time she revealed the true depth of her despair. Instead of running away, like she’d feared he would, he drew her into his arms and held her while they talked and watched the sunrise.

  “Did you make this?” she asked.

  “Just like last time,” he said.

  It had been difficult to imagine the boy carefully folding the paper into a delicate swan; it was doubly difficult to imagine the man doing so. Her heart swelled with love as she held the swan against her chest.

  “I still have the first one you made me,” she told him.

  Julian brushed the hair back from her face as he cupped her cheek and bent to kiss her. He shouldn’t be here, this was her life and her job, but staying away was more difficult than he anticipated.

  He’d known having sex with her would only amplify his need to complete the bond, but he hadn’t anticipated how much it would accelerate it and how much he would loathe being separated from her for any length of time. It was his fault. He’d stayed away from her for so long that he was pushing the boundaries of his restraint before having sex with her, and now it was only a matter of time before he lost control.

  “I’ll let you get back to work,” he said. “What time will you be done?”

  “Around ten.”

  “I’ll come back to walk you home.”

  “I’ll see you then.”

  He kissed her and squeezed her hand before releasing her and walking away. A small hole opened in Aida’s heart as he opened the door and stepped outside. He shoved his hands in his pockets as he strode past the plate glass windows and toward Addy’s.

  Aida slipped into the storage room and set the swan on her purse before returning to the gallery. She plastered on a smile when a woman approached to ask her about one of Owen’s paintings.

  • • •

  “There are only a couple of paintings left,” Owen said as he examined the walls with a smile and his hands clasped behind his back. He deserved the cat-that-ate-the-canary look on his face; he’d proven his talent with this showing.

  “Gerald bought two of them,” Nicolette said.

  Aida turned off the lights as she walked around the room. “I think the rest will sell tomorrow.”

  When the door opened, she looked up as Julian entered. “I’ll be outside,” he told her before retreating.

  “If you decide to give him up, I’m sure Gerald would be more than happy to take his place,” Nicolette said. “He was quite taken with you.”

  Owen scowled at this.

  “Who?” Aida asked; she was too focused on Julian to follow the conversation.

  “The handsome man in a sports coat,” Nicolette said. “You spent a good deal of time showing him around.”

  It took Aida a minute to recall who she was talking about, and then she said, “Oh, yes, I remember him.”

  “He seemed like a pompous asshole to me,” Owen said.

  “That pompous asshole bought two of your paintings,” Nicolette reminded him.

  “I didn’t say he was an asshole with bad taste.”

  Aida chuckled while Nicolette turned off the last light. Owen held the door and waited for them to exit as Nicolette set the alarm. When Nicolette was outside, Aida locked the door and put her keys in her purse.

  “Good night,” she said to them before linking her arm through Julian’s and leaning against his side. She didn’t look back at them, but she could feel them watching as she and Julian strolled away.

  “How was your night?” he asked.

  “Good. I think we’ll sell the rest of the paintings tomorrow. It’s been a successful showing. How was your night?”

  “It’s a lot better now,” he said as he kissed the top of her head.

  “It really is.”

  They didn’t speak while they walked the rest of the way to her apartment. Though her feet ached and she kept yawning, her pulse accelerated with every step they took toward her home. Once they were inside, she planned to leisurely peel the clothes from his body and run her tongue over every inch of him.

  By the time they reached her apartment, she was so aroused she could barely
breathe as her fingers slid beneath his shirt.

  CHAPTER 30

  When the gallery finally closed at eight the next night, Aida practically skipped up to Julian before throwing her arms around his neck. He lifted her off the ground as he crushed her against him. She had the next two days off, and she was looking forward to every minute of them.

  Normally, she booked some headshot work on Mondays and Tuesdays, but after the hectic craziness of a showing, she usually gave herself a couple of days off. For the first time, she was thankful Julian’s arrival coincided with the busyness of Owen’s showing.

  The gallery was supposed to have closed at five, but things ran longer than Nicolette anticipated. The steady flow of people still attending kept them from leaving, and in the end, they sold all of Owen’s paintings.

  “I’m sorry work ran so late,” she said. Last night he’d told her that since she was getting off early, he would plan something for them.

  “Don’t apologize,” he told her as he set her down.

  “I hope you didn’t have anything special planned,” she said.

  “Nothing that couldn’t be changed.”

  He pulled her against his side as they walked back toward her apartment. Her stomach rumbled and she was starving, but she didn’t have it in her to go to the bar tonight. She’d order some Chinese food when she got home and stuff herself. Maybe she could talk Julian into a foot rub.

  When they arrived at her building, she let them in and leaned against his side as they trudged up the stairs. When they arrived at the third floor, he didn’t lead her to her apartment but continued up the stairs.

  “Where are we going?” she asked.

  “To the change of plans,” he said.

  Aida frowned at him, but the mischievous smile he gave her melted her heart and made her aching feet a little more bearable. Julian pulled her closer when they stopped outside the door to the roof. Pushing against the metal bar, he shoved the door open, and they walked outside together.

  When the chilly air hit her, Aida shivered, and he held her closer. It was a good thing he’d planned for the cold.

  Aida was excited to see what the change of plans was, but she hoped they involved some heat as she huddled deeper into her jacket. She couldn’t get any closer to his side if she tried. The door clicked shut behind them, and he led her around the back of it to reveal a white tent. Her mouth parted as she gazed from him to the tent and back again.

  “I know it’s not until Wednesday, but I thought we could celebrate your birthday a little early,” he said. “This way, I could surprise you.”

  “You remembered my birthday?” They were the same age, but they never celebrated their birthdays together, and she only ever mentioned it to him once before. She remembered his birthday, but that’s because it was easy; he was an April Fool’s Day baby.

  “Of course. It’s April twenty-third.”

  Aida didn’t know what to make of that as she gazed from him to the tent and back again while they walked toward it. It stood over six feet tall and was solid white, like a banquet tent but smaller. He stopped to lift the flap of the tent, and when he pulled it back, a blast of heat drifted out to warm her skin.

  She was practically bouncing on her toes when she walked into the tent. She had no idea where he had gotten it, but the small heater in the corner made the space toasty warm. The checkered blanket covering the roof had a plate and two wine glasses on it. A tin package sat on the plate, and the scent of marinara sauce wafted from it. The bucket of ice next to the blanket held a bottle of champagne.

  Julian took her hand and led her over to the blanket. “If I recall, chicken parmesan was your favorite.”

  Her eyebrows shot up at the revelation he recalled this trivial detail. “How did you remember that?”

  “I spent the past four and a half years recalling every detail about you so I wouldn’t forget anything.”

  Tears bloomed in her eyes before she threw herself into his arms. At one time, she didn’t think she’d ever forgive him for walking out of her life, but he’d hurt himself a lot when he did it. She loved him more for his selflessness.

  “What would you have done if you returned to find me married with kids?” she asked. “Or engaged or simply with someone else I loved?”

  Julian’s arms tightened around her. It could have happened, and it would have been his fault. “I would have left you alone to enjoy your life.”

  “But if I’m your mate, then what would have become of you? What would it have done to you?”

  Julian clasped her hand and led her over to the blanket. He helped her settle into place before bending to pull the plastic top off the container of food. Aida watched his graceful fingers, setting the food before her. She tried to peer up at him, but he kept his head turned away from her as he turned toward the bucket of ice.

  A hollow pit opened in her stomach when she realized he was trying to avoid her questions. “Julian, what aren’t you telling me?”

  Julian removed the champagne from the bucket and uncorked it. “I’d hoped because we’d done nothing more than kiss, I could continue without you after I reached maturity.”

  “But…?” she prodded when he stopped speaking.

  “But after six months, I realized that wasn’t going to happen. It became increasingly difficult to stay away from you, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to maintain my control. Something had to give.”

  “You told me you came back to see your family.”

  “I did come back to see them.”

  Aida’s stomach protested when she lowered her fork instead of plunging it into the chicken parm. “Why did you come back to see them?”

  Julian finished pouring the champagne and set a glass beside her on the roof while he sipped his. Tilting his head back, he examined the clear plastic only an inch over his head. He’d specially ordered the tent so they could see the night sky. The stars weren’t anywhere near as vivid here as they were in Maine, but a few of them shone in the sky.

  “To say goodbye,” he said as he sat on the blanket across from her.

  Aida’s hand clenched around her fork. “What do you mean goodbye?” She suspected his answer, but she needed to hear him confirm it.

  “I was getting to a point where I was dangerous around humans,” he said. “There were only a few choices left to me.”

  “And those choices were?”

  “Death, to be locked away, or to turn Savage. And I far prefer death to becoming a Savage or being locked away.”

  Aida’s hand flew to her mouth to cover her cry of dismay. “There are other options!”

  “Not for me. Once I stopped aging, I started rapidly losing control. Being in public became a constant struggle, and I wanted to slaughter every human who came near me.”

  He couldn’t meet her gaze as he admitted this, so he stared at the wall. He hated that she’d seen the darkness inside him in the alley; he’d hoped to keep that worst piece of himself hidden from her.

  “There are purebred vampires who live for centuries without turning into a Savage,” she said.

  “But they haven’t found their mates and given them up. It was different for me, Aida. When I left, I knew that, without you, my life was never going to be a long one. Even if I could make it another fifty years, once you died, that would have been the end of me. And I wasn’t going to make it another fifty years.”

  “You would have rather died than tell me this?”

  “If I came back to find you happily married with children, yes.”

  “You would have died for me?”

  “I would never hesitate to give my life for yours.”

  Tears spilled down her face as she pushed aside her chicken parm and crawled across the blanket to him. Kneeling before him, she draped her arms over his shoulders and kissed him. Julian had planned to wine and dine her before making love to her, but when her body melted against his, all plans for their romantic evening vanished.

  Aida played with t
he hair on his nape while she deepened the kiss. She considered herself in love with him before, but now she was sure of it. He’d given up so much for her and planned to die without her ever knowing how much he loved her. There wasn’t anything she wouldn’t do for this wonderful man.

  Her fingers worked the buttons on his shirt free before pushing it open so she could flatten her palms against his chest. She relished the beat of his heart beneath her palm as his fingers threaded through her hair while he kissed her breathless.

  Julian had taken her as often as possible over the past couple of days, but his desire for her continued to increase. With every touch, every kiss, and every sigh, he found himself falling more in love with her. They hadn’t broached the subject of changing her yet, mainly because he didn’t know how to bring it up.

  After everything she endured with her captors, he didn’t know how well she would take the idea of becoming a vampire. She had accepted she was his mate with ease and knew what followed, but he would give her more time to adjust to the idea.

  Before he returned to the States, he was hanging on by a thread, but holding her and knowing she was his, made it easier to maintain his control. However, he didn’t know how much longer that would last. Still, he managed to keep his fangs restrained every time they were together.

  When she pushed his shirt back on his shoulders, he shrugged it off before unbuttoning the high-necked, black blouse she wore. He stripped the shirt off and smiled when he saw the lacy, black bra he’d told her was a favorite of his.

  He ran his fingers around the edge of it before tracing the edge of her dusky areola. “Did you wear this for me?”

  “Who else would I wear it for?” she teased.

  “No one,” he growled, and for a second, the demon part of him broke through as it sought to claim her. “Ever.”

  Barely leashed violence simmered beneath his surface when he lifted his reddened eyes to hers. Always so careful to keep the vampire part of him chained when they were alone, it astonished her to see it so clearly visible now.

  Their relationship was wading into treacherous waters, and they would have to deal with the next step soon, but she wasn’t ready yet. She wouldn’t turn him away; she loved him too much not to join him. She just needed more time to get used to the idea of becoming a vampire and drinking blood.