Arena

by Logan Jacobs

  “I’m sorry, did you say ratings?” I asked. I felt like the night couldn’t get more surreal, yet, here I was asking an alien about my ratings.

  “Yeah,” Paul answered as if I was an idiot, “the whole thing is broadcasted on all networks. I just happened to catch you on the alternate feed as I was setting up for the night. Most folks don’t watch any of the minor trials.”

  “So, it’s like some intergalactic reality show?” I asked incredulously.

  “Pretty much,” Paul admitted. “Hey, isn’t that your lady friend over there?”

  He pointed over near the bathrooms where Artemis was in a rather heated discussion with a bipedal humanoid alien that stood roughly my height but had pink, hairless skin that looked like an in utero shot of an unborn baby and was covered in a layer of clear slime. The alien had no eyebrows, big, bulbous, milky white eyes, no lips, and two small holes where a nose should have been. It wore a kind of space suit looking outfit that helped keep the slime from leaking everywhere. It was one of the most disgusting things I’d seen so far.

  The alien stood in front of Artemis and kept her from moving past. I got up from my stool and walked over.

  “Be nice, Marc. Be nice,” I whispered to myself as I walked.

  “Get out of my way, you Pustularian cretin!” I heard Artemis shout as I got within earshot.

  “Hey, come on, chipie,” the Pustularian sneered, its voice like bubbling oatmeal. “I’ve never mated with a human before. The Simians do tell some wonderfully lurid stories though.”

  “Ah, but you know how the Simians are,” I said as I reached them and put my arm around Artemis’ shoulders as a not so subtle ‘she’s with me, pal’ gesture. “Always puttin’ their damn dirty ape paws on things they shouldn’t.”

  “Listen here, pal,” the overgrown slimy baby alien said, “the lady was mine to talk to.”

  “One, I’m not your pal,” I started, my voice as calm and low as I could manage, “And two, she ain’t anybody's but her own. Why don’t you talk a walk, okay?

  I started to turn around, but the Pustularian grabbed me by the shoulder and spun us back around.

  “I am Flemgar of Mukustry, and I take what I want!” Flemgar roared.

  “Is Flemgar a family name, or did your parents just hate you?” I laughed.

  He twisted and started to throw a punch, but he telegraphed it from a mile away, and I shoved him hard in the chest. It knocked him back into one of the booths that lined the wall. Drinks spilled everywhere, and the tavern got instantly quiet.

  Something uttered an annoyed growl from the dark shadows at the back of the booth. The creature stood and moved forward from the shadow. I could feel myself gulp hard, my mouth suddenly very dry.

  It stood six and a half feet tall and was covered in black scales for skin that shifted like thick motor oil as the creature moved. It had overly long but heavily muscled arms that ended in plate-sized hands with four fingers and a thumb, all tipped with black, bone-like claws. Its shoulders were incredibly broad and muscled and led to a thick neck that bulged with coiled tendons. The head that sat atop the neck was as if someone took a Cro-Magnon skull and smashed it together with the head of an iguana, topped it with short spikes, and filled it with dozens of razor-sharp teeth. Red, reptilian eyes glared out from beneath a heavy ridged brow as if they wanted to destroy everything they saw.

  The creature wore a floor-length, sleeveless duster type coat that was made from some kind of thick hide, a form-fitting black compression shirt, and military-style pants. On its right leg was a low-slung holster that held a massive hand cannon.

  It stared down with its red eyes as it appraised every inch of me. It was all I could do to meet its gaze. My legs wanted to turn and high-tail it out of there, but I knew that would be a huge mistake.

  Artemis had moved beside and slightly behind me, and I could feel her take my left hand in hers.

  “Marc, we should really go now,” she whispered with life-threatening urgency, “that is a Baal Kaali. They make the Predator look like a Muppet.”

  Flemgar literally started to shake, gobs of slime flew off his exposed skin as he picked himself off the table.

  “I am so sorry, Tyyraxx, sir,” he stammered to the Baal Kaali. “Would you like to rip the human dog limb from limb?”

  Tyyraxx seemed to smile, the edges of its wide, reptilian mouth curled back ever so slightly.

  “No,” Tyyraxx hissed, his voice like dry, crumpled snakeskin. “This one is insignificant. I shan't demean myself.”

  He walked out from behind the table, and the room took a collective gasp. Then the scary dragon-man and a few of his bruiser entourage walked to the back. Just before he disappeared through the back exit, he turned to where we still stood.

  “By all means, you may savage him however you wish,” Tyyraxx gloated with a chuckle of pure malevolence, turned, and was gone.

  I could feel the tension leave the room in one big rush.

  Flemgar turned back to us and was about to say something when my right fist smashed into his face hole and knocked him off his feet.

  “Time to not be nice,” I said as I moved over him. I was assaulted with the smell of gasoline, which I thought was pretty damn strange, but I didn’t get to dwell on it as a massive bar fight broke out.

  Fists, paws, tentacles, and every other appendage flew as aliens started to fight with each other. Glasses broke. I saw a statuesque female alien, of human descent, with orange skin and dark auburn hair tied in a warrior’s knot at the back of her head, clad in futuristic segmented azure armor, grab an overgrown Ewok alien in each hand, lift them off the ground, and smash them together. She laughed as if this were an amusement park.

  I was about to reach down and grab the Pustularian so I could not be nice to him again when I was yanked unceremoniously off my feet and into the air. I had the wind knocked out of me as I was thrown onto a very hard surface that was warm to the touch.

  “I am so sorry to have to do this to you, Champion Havak,” Brek’Taup yelled apologetically, “but you started a fight, I have to ask you to leave.”

  I had a very witty one-liner ready to go, but it got lost as Brek tossed me through the front doors, and I landed on the street with a thud.

  I had just started to pick myself up when three of the Flemgar’s buddies came out the door. They spotted me pretty quickly, since I was right in front of them, and began to advance on me. One pulled a baton out of his jacket pocket, gave it a flick, and it extended out into a nasty looking club. Another slipped a pair of electrified taser-knuckles on to his hands. The third pulled off his belt which turned out to be a length of black, square chain that trailed sparks as he let it drag on the ground.

  Life was about to get real interesting.

  “Okay, maybe we got off on the wrong foot, fellas,” I said in as charming a tone as I could muster. I got myself up into a crouch and tensed all my muscles as tight as I could. I was probably only going to have one chance at getting as big a blow as I could in first, and I wanted to make it count.

  I was just about to launch myself at the goons when Artemis cartwheeled out the doors and did a flawless back handspring that landed her on the baton goon’s shoulders. She wrapped her legs around his torso and whipped herself forward in a bad-ass Black Widow move that flung the goon to the ground where she punched him in the face in rapid succession.

  Chain goon spun on her which gave me the opening I had been hoping for. I launched from the coiled crouch like an Olympic sprinter coming off the blocks and caught chain goon’s arm as he was in a massive backswing. His forward momentum flung us both forward as he twisted to try to shake me off, which is what I had been hoping for. I let his momentum swing me off his arm and shoulder and rolled onto one knee right next to Artemis as she was pummeling baton goon’s face.

  Chain goon smiled for a second but then realized what I’d done. He hadn’t seen Taser-knuckle goon approach from the other side, hands held out in front him, crackling with el
ectricity. In the act of shaking me off, he had whipped his chain out and wrapped it around taser-knuckle’s hands. Blue electricity traveled down the metal links and into chain goon. Every muscle in his body tensed, he let out a Wilhelm scream, and passed out. Once again, the smell of gasoline assaulted my nostrils.

  Taser-knuckles, his namesake weapon sparking and smoking from overloading, didn’t like the odds anymore, because he flung the broken Taser-knuckles off his hands and began backing away. He didn’t get too far. I saw the doors open behind him as Brek tossed another patron out. Said patron collided with Taser-knuckles with bone-crunching force. Neither one made any move to get up.

  I turned to Artemis, and she gave the baton goon one last punch.

  “Thanks for the assist, but I could have taken all three of these pink pukes,” I said with an exhausted, cocky grin.

  “Oh, I have every faith in the world that you were going to, Marc,” she concurred. “But if any permanent harm should come to you outside of the Crucible, I could never forgive myself, and I would more than likely be erased.”

  She grabbed my hand, and we ran off down the street. Artemis tapped a few buttons on a small screen embedded in the forearm of her jumpsuit, and a moment later, a hover-taxi came to a halt in front of us. Its suicide doors opened, and we hopped in.

  She tapped a few more buttons, and the driverless taxi ascended back into the sky to merge into traffic.

  Both of us sat in the back of the taxi, out of breath, as we sucked in lungfuls of air-conditioned oxygen. Neither one of us said a word. Then I started to laugh at the utter ridiculousness of the entire night. It started small but soon grew into great big belly laughs.

  Artemis was confused at first, but then her human biology took over and she couldn’t help herself, she began laughing too. We laughed like idiots for a good thirty seconds until the giggles finally petered out.

  I looked over at her. Her hair was a total mess, strands had been flung all over the place, and she had a few beads of sweat still on her upper lip. Her cheeks were still flushed with color as the adrenaline rush started to fade. Her eyes sparkled with the kind of life you only get when you realize you just barely got out of a spot that you more than likely should have gotten really hurt in.

  At that moment, she was the sexiest woman I had ever seen.

  We sat for a long beat, silent, as we locked eyes. Then, in unison, we both grabbed each other and kissed furiously.

  The next ten minutes passed in a blur of heated hormones as we made out in the back of a taxi that flew three hundred feet off the ground.

  Her lips were soft, and tasted slightly of sweat, as she pressed them into mine. I felt her tongue dart out hesitantly, I could tell she was nervous to lick the edge of my lips. In response, I ran my hands through her hair, tilted her head back slightly as my tongue met hers. Her body stiffened in surprise as her eyes shot open like I’d given her an electric shock. Our eyes met again, this time only inches apart, and I gave her a wicked little wink. I felt her lips pull back into a smile as she winked back, pressed her body into mine, and pushed me back against the seat. She kissed me hard, wet, and long as I had one hand balled with her hair at the back of her head, and another grabbed on to her ass, and I pulled her closer.

  I had just started to kiss her slender neck, a moan of pleasure rushed from her lips when the taxi came to a shuddering halt. The door popped open as an electronic voice said, “You have reached your destination.”

  The shock of the abrupt interruption knocked us out of the moment. Slightly embarrassed, we both tried to straighten our clothes as I got out of the taxi. I had to rearrange my jumpsuit hastily to avoid any uncouth protrusion before I turned back to her.

  We stared at each other for another long moment. The taxi beeped at us, annoyed we were not leaving. Artemis brushed a few strands of hair back behind her ears and opened her mouth to say something like, “Here you go, sleep well, see you in the morning.”

  I didn’t give her the chance.

  I grabbed her hand, yanked her out of the taxi, pulled her body close to mine and kissed her in front of the entrance to a small apartment building. I dipped her ever so slightly, and she reached up to grab onto the back of my neck and head. It was the most perfect movie kiss that had never been in a movie.

  I pulled her back up, and she grabbed my hand before dragging me into the apartment building.

  I caught a few glimpses of the simple lobby as we ran through it and got on the elevator at the far end. A robotic front desk agent had time to raise its hand in a confused wave before the elevator door closed, and Artemis and I attacked each other with teenage enthusiasm.

  When the elevator doors opened we nearly fell out onto the floor. Still kissing, we managed to make our way down a narrow hallway, her fingers unzipped the front of my jumpsuit as I undid the belt buckle that was around her tight stomach until we reached what I hoped was the door to my apartment.

  Artemis pressed her hand to a panel on the door which beeped once, turned green, and slid open.

  This time we did fall to the floor. From my upside down vantage point, I could make out that it was a really nice, completely furnished studio apartment. There was a small kitchenette with a fridge and stove. A little living room area with a loveseat couch that faced a flat screen monitor embedded in the wall, and a small, but very comfy looking full-size mattress under a large bay window that looked out over the lights of the city sat along the wall.

  Artemis and I shimmied our bodies inside so that the door could slide closed. We got to our feet somehow, our lips still locked in a heated kiss, and stumbled over to the bed. I managed to flop down first, the mattress just the right amount of soft and firm, and looked up at Artemis who stood at the foot of the bed.

  She was bathed in the multicolor lights of the city as it shined in through the window. She smiled down at me seductively as she unzipped her jumpsuit the rest of the way and slowly peeled it from her shoulders. She wiggled her hips slightly and inched the jumpsuit over the curves of her hips until gravity finally took hold and it fell to the floor.

  I felt my breath leave my body as I looked at her. She wore a purple lace bra that accentuated her already ample breasts, and a matching purple pair of skin-tight lace boy shorts. She reached up languidly with her arms and ran her hands through her hair, her body swayed and arched with the motion, and I felt a tight, all-consuming yearning start at the base of my stomach and work its way down.

  I reached up and took her hand in mine as I pulled her down to the bed. My hands moved over her body as if they wanted to devour her. Our kissing had become frantic, impatient. I felt her hands scramble as they unzipped my jumpsuit all the way and pulled the fabric from my body.

  Her breasts filled my hands, and I could feel the tight nubs of her nipples as they hardened between my fingers. She gasped in pleasure and grabbed on to me tighter. Before I knew it, I felt her legs wrap around the back of my thighs. We locked eyes one more time as her hand guided me to her.

  Time seemed to stop as a wave of pleasure flowed through my body unlike any other I had ever felt. Both of us took in sharp breaths, as the shock of ecstasy rolled through us, then we kissed again, and our bodies began to move in rhythm. Our hands still explored as our moans became more urgent. Her hips bucked against mine as if they begged for more. I didn’t hold back.

  Soon we reached a lust-filled pace, our bodies writhed as one, as the crescendo approached. Her hands pulled me deep as I buried my face in the crook of her neck, her lips inches from my ear. She cried “yes, yes, yes,” until the crescendo broke for us both.

  When the final reverberation of the climax had washed away, we lay side by side in the bed under the window. Sweat cooled our bodies. Artemis’ head lay snugly on my chest as she snuggled her body into mine.

  “Welcome to the Forge of Heroes, Marc Havak,” she purred as she drifted off to sleep.

  I stared up at the ceiling and lost myself in the bright mosaic lights of the city coming in thr
ough the great bay windows.

  That was the end of my first day as Marc Havak, Champion of Earth, Warrior in the Crucible of Carnage.

  It was the best damn birthday that I’d ever had.

  Chapter Nine

  I woke with the memory of the night before swirling through my mind like lazy cigarette smoke on a humid day. I could feel the sunrise, or moonrise, or whatever passed for morning light here, warm on my face as I rolled over in the bed. I was expecting to find a sexy warm body next to me, but all I rolled onto was empty sheets and a few disheveled pillows. Which wasn’t so bad either. They were comfy and still smelled vaguely of Artemis’ skin.

  I hadn’t opened my eyes yet as I enjoyed the last few remnants of the amazing sleep I’d gotten, and I could hear Artemis making noises in the kitchen area. It sounded like there may have been coffee brewing which was confirmed when the aroma of some very strong, darkly roasted beans wafted over tantalizingly.

  “That smells amazing, babe,” I murmured as I stretched out into a long yawn. My muscles were a little sore, but not nearly as bad as they should have been considering the tremendous amount of strain they’d been put under the day before. The spot on my back where I’d been clawed had completely healed over. It was tender to the touch but otherwise good as new.

  There was some clatter from the kitchen area, and a few moments later, I heard a cup as it was set down on the small nightstand next to the bed. I rolled back over, sheet half draped across my body, and propped myself up on one elbow, my eyes still closed, into what I thought would be a slightly goofy yet still sexy pose.

  “Hey, sexy face, why don’t you bring that amazing ass back to bed before we have to go meet grumpy Grizz?” I said as rakishly as I could muster.

  “Because I am already here, human,” Grizz’s voice replied about an inch from my face. “And my behind is spectacularly amazing. Thank you for noticing.”