The 'Ohana Tree

by Rebecca Addison

  "No," I said, "we have to wait because once I have you, I know I'm going to need you. And waiting two weeks to see you again would probably kill me."

  "That would be sad," she said running her fingertips over my ribs.

  "I'd have to be buried on Lana'i. Here lies Kailano Iokua Onakea. Died after a short, but courageously fought battle with blue balls."

  "Aloha, Dipper," Garrett said glancing up from his newspaper when we walked through the door later that night. He took his glasses off, resting them on the coffee table. "How are you, Kai?

  Tessa sat down next to him on the sofa and he swung an arm over her shoulder.

  "Seven across is Lima."

  He frowned. "No, it isn't. It starts with an H."

  "That's because that one is wrong."

  The corner of his mouth lifted in amusement as he folded the paper and threw it on the floor. "So, tell me what you two got up to this weekend.”

  I sat down in the chair opposite and Tess looked at me, her face flushing.

  "What do you mean?"

  Garret stood up, yawning and rubbing at his eyes. "This is a small island. I think I'd heard the story ten times before I'd even left the airport."

  "Hilarious," Tess said in a strained voice. "But what are you talking about?" Her eyes moved to me as she said it, and Garrett grinned.

  "Don't play dumb, Dipper. I've raised four girls, remember? Now, I may only see them every few weeks but I'm not that rusty.”

  “Should I go?” I said. Tessa widened her eyes at me and mouthed ‘No’ and Garrett snorted when he caught it.

  “Everyone is talking about the way you practically dragged Dipper out of Pete's last night,” he said in my direction. “In fact, I believe I heard Kiki from the gas station say to Michelle from the real estate agent office that it was the hottest thing she had ever seen."

  Garret and I laughed.

  "Can't anything be private here?" Tess mumbled, lifting a cushion over her face.

  "Nope," Garrett said, standing up. "Want a drink?"

  "Water, thanks."

  “Dip?”

  The cushion shook its head.

  As soon as Garrett was in the kitchen I crossed the room and sat down next to her, gently pulling the pillow back down to her lap. She hugged it to her chest. “He’s horrible sometimes.”

  “He’s only teasing you.”

  “I go red when I’m embarrassed. And then that embarrasses me and it makes me go even redder.”

  “You’re not red,” I said, reaching between our laps to hold her hand. She was, though. I felt the heat coming off her face.

  Garrett returned with a tray full of glasses and a jug of water and mint. He passed the drinks around and then sat on the armchair I’d just vacated.

  “I used to be better at minding my own business,” he said, sipping his water and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

  “No, you didn’t.”

  He raised an eyebrow. “This is the last thing I'll say. Tonight, anyway. I want you to think about staying. I miss you, kid, I never get to see you. And you know you always have a home here with me.” He put his glass down on the tray and fixed me with a long, cool stare. “Kai, or no Kai."

  She took a long drink of her water. "Thank you."

  We both waited for her to say something else, but she clamped her lips shut and rested her glass on her leg, beads of moisture sliding down it until there was a wet ring on the fabric of her jeans.

  Garrett looked at me briefly. "Why don’t you just try sticking around? What are you afraid of? Being happy?"

  "I love you, Garrett," she said, standing up. "I love just about everything about you, even the way you leave your horrible, sandy towels on the bathroom floor and those super weird chants you do on the lanai right outside my bedroom at 5 am every morning. But you don't know everything about me.” She dumped her glass on the table and walked toward the door. “I’m going to take a shower. Do you want to stay for dinner, Kai?”

  I checked my watch. “I’ve got to go. I’m playing at Pete’s tonight. Do you want to come down?”

  "She'll go," Garrett said.

  Behind him, Tess glared at him in exasperation. "I'm not fifteen. You can't tell me what to do."

  He turned in his chair, leaning his arm on the back and looked over his shoulder. "We both know you're going. And I think I know where you're sleeping tonight, too."

  "Garrett!"

  "I'll see you later, Tess," I said, heading for the door. "We're on from eight."

  She held up one hand to wave and then dropped it by her side, a tight smile on her face.

  I closed the door behind me and drove home, Garrett's words echoing in my ears. What are you afraid of?

  I wanted to ask her the same thing.

  Chapter Sixteen

  The band was on a break when Tess walked in the door and it took me a second to register that it was even her. She made her way through the crowd to where the band and I were standing at the bar and I looked her up and down. "Are you kidding?"

  She shrugged and slid onto the stool next to me, a small smile on her lips. "What?"

  "Couldn't you come in here in pajamas or an old muumuu or something?"

  "Why?"

  I moved behind the stool and pulled her back against my chest. Pete glanced up from where he drinking at the end of the bar and raised an eyebrow.

  "It's just a dress," she said unnecessarily, smiling at me over her shoulder. "Garrett was scandalized."

  I dipped my head and whispered in her ear. "I take back what I said before."

  She leaned her head back and I kissed her temple before sitting down on the stool next to her.

  "No, I think you were right," she said, smiling at the look on my face. "It's a good idea to wait."

  "In that case, I wish you'd reconsidered the dress. That's not fighting fair."

  "I wanted to look nice. I can't wear anything like this during the day because of the sun."

  "You always look beautiful," I said. "And I like it. Too much. It's the same color as your eyes."

  She rested her hand on my arm. "Kai, can we go somewhere and talk? How long do you have?"

  Pete was surrounded by a group of guys we went to school with and by the looks of it, he was in the middle of one of his 'big wave' surfing stories. "Pete's drunk. He's not going to remember that we're meant to be playing for a while. Come out on the deck."

  I took her hand and led her along the back wall, out of Pete's line of sight, until we were outside under a sky that was slowly changing from violet to black. We made our way to an empty spot on the deck at the far end and rested our elbows on the railing.

  "What's up?" I brushed her hair over her shoulder and she met my eyes. Something big, then.

  "I want you to do something for me while you're away. It's important."

  "Okay," I said slowly. "What is it?"

  "I want you to think about whether you want to get involved with me. I like you. I don't want you to get hurt when I leave. And I will leave one day. We're at the crossroads now, you can still back out, because Kai, I think that you might be looking for something that I can't give you."

  I watched her mouth move, not really listening to what she was saying. I was too busy wondering if I was that transparent with everyone, or if it was just with Tess.

  Below us, the water slapped against the wooden posts of the deck. I exhaled slowly through my mouth. "That's the strangest thing a girl has ever said to me."

  I knew there was no way I could be part of her world and then walk away at the end with my heart intact. I knew I was getting myself into something that would hurt me eventually. But it was worth it. To have her, even for a moment, was better than a lifetime without her.

  "Is this the only way it can be with you?"

  "Yes."

  "Then I don't need to think about it."

  "Kai," she whispered. "I still want you to take the two weeks."

  I placed a finger over her lips. "I'll think a
bout it."

  But I knew my mind was made up. We were already on some kind of runaway train together by then. There was no destination. And there was no getting off.

  “Now," I said, changing the subject. "I have a question for you. Do you want to dance?"

  While the band took a break, Pete had a playlist set up to keep people drinking and having a good time. The dance floor in front of the stage was packed with people. The usual holiday couples were groping each other, but I also saw a few locals dancing.

  "Are they doing the hula?" she asked as I led her out into the middle of the crowd by the hand.

  "Yeah." I spun her around and then pulled her against my side. "Want to try it?"

  "Umm.."

  "Come on," I said, moving behind her and placing a hand on each of her hips. I pulled her back against me and said into her ear, "It's easy. You just move like this.."

  My hands locked around her pelvis as I swayed her hips back and forth against me. Despite the loud music and all of the people around us, the room was suddenly quiet and still. There was heat where the bare skin of her back touched my chest and I was aware of my every heartbeat, the blood thick and drunk as it made its way around my body. Clunk, clunk, clunk. She grew heavy against me, leaning back as if she couldn't hold herself up anymore. I knew what I was doing to her. She was doing the same thing to me.

  "Kai," she said, putting her hands on my wrists.

  I leaned down and spoke into her ear, "Relax your hips."

  We kept moving, the back of her head against my chest and my hands rocking her from side to side. After a while, she loosened up and then she was doing it on her own.

  I bent forward and kissed the side of her neck, sucking it gently and not caring who saw me do it. She dug her nails into my wrists.

  "Your arms have to be like the waves," I said, taking my hands from her hips. I put my arms over hers, threading our fingers together, then lifted them, mimicking the movements of a woman in her sixties who was dancing the hula in front of us. The song came to an end and people drifted off the dance floor in the direction of the bar. I slowly lowered her arms, crossing them in front of her waist and pulled her hard against me.

  "I'm back on," I said, kissing her again on the side of her neck. "Do you want to stick around?"

  She didn't move.

  "Want me to help you into a chair?"

  She spun around in my arms and stared up into my face.

  "That, Kai Onakea, was not fighting fair."

  The guys and I played the rest of the set and unlike some nights, it was a good time. The crowd had great energy and it helped that for once, I had someone in the audience to sing to. Tess was sitting next to Pete at the bar and he was talking in the way that he did when he was drunk, mouth moving too slowly and his gestures way too big. Tess was leaning in, trying to hear what he was saying and every few minutes she’d look around, trying to find my face. Pete reached back behind the bar, passing Tess a beer. When she next caught my eye, she raised her bottle and winked.

  "What's up with you, man?" I said to Pete when we'd unplugged and I'd made my way to the bar. "Aren't you meant to be the boss here?"

  He glanced up from his drink, something harder this time, and shook his head. "No, you're the boss Kailano. You're always the fucking boss."

  "Okay, Pete."

  He lifted his head slowly, turning to me with a snarl. "Why don't you stop being such a fucking hero, man? She doesn't care. She's already begging for it. They all are."

  I leaned down, resting my elbows on the bar and moved my face close to his. "Watch it. When you're back to being a nice guy in the morning, you're going to regret saying that."

  He lurched to the side, grabbing my shoulder when he lost his balance. "You think you're such hot -"

  "Ah, fuck it." I walked behind him and wrapped my arms around his chest, lifting him off the stool in one swift movement. He made a grunt of protest and stumbled when I got him to his feet, but he knew there was no point in fighting. "There's a room out the back with a sofa," I said to Tess as I pulled him backward. "He can sleep it off out there."

  'Which way is it?" I pointed down the corridor past the kitchen. "I'll go and get it set up for him."

  I watched her carefully make her way around groups of people talking and the tables that were dotted around the room. It was dark and I knew she probably couldn't see much, but she kept her head up and made her way confidently across the room. The only sign that she couldn't see well was her left hand, which she held slightly in front and away from her as she walked. Getting Pete to the sofa wasn't as effortless. He bumped into people, tipped over chairs and made a woman spill her drink down her dress. Finally, I got him to the doorway and saw that Tess had found a blanket and an empty wastepaper bin, which she'd strategically placed at the head of the sofa.

  "You're an asshole," Pete slurred as I lowered him down and his head hit the armrest. I covered him with the blanket and positioned him on his side.

  "Go to sleep.” I stacked the pillows behind his back so that he couldn't roll over and choke if he was sick. "I'll come and see you before I leave for Lana'i."

  "Fuck off, Kai," he growled, squeezing his eyes shut tight.

  Tess cut her eyes to mine and made her way to the doorway. After a second, I switched on a lamp, flicked off the main light, and shut the door. Pete was already snoring on the other side.

  "Are you okay?" she said as soon as I shut the door. "You looked like you wanted to punch him back there."

  "Nah," I said, trying not to smile. "That's not really my style. Although I did think about tripping him up."

  She laughed. Which was, of course, the point.

  Outside, the clouds were low and the air felt clean and metallic. I was pretty sure a storm was coming. I scanned the sky and grabbed her hand, walking her quickly across the bridge and car park. We made it to the street just as I felt the first drop of rain.

  "He's going to feel like absolute ass tomorrow," she said as we stepped up onto the sidewalk.

  "He won't remember any of it."

  The occasional drops that had been falling since we left the club had turned to rain, but it wasn't heavy enough yet to make us want to pick up our pace. When we reached the shops, there was a sudden boom and the sky lit up with a flash.

  "Why is he angry with you?" she said, stopping so that I had to stop, too.

  I pulled her back under the awning of a shop and gripped the back of my head with my hands. "I got offered a record deal."

  "Are you serious?" she screamed, clapping a hand over her mouth, her eyes wide with excitement. "That's amazing!" When I didn't say anything, she wrapped her arms around my waist and pressed her cheek to my chest. "Wait, why is he mad about that?"

  "Pete's my manager," I said, walking us both backward, further out of the rain. "I never asked him to be. He just decided one day that he was. Anyway, he'll get over it. He's just drinking away all the stuff he was buying in his head with all the money he thought I'd be making."

  She lifted her face away and squirmed out of my arms, then backed up two steps until she was under a torrent of water. The crazy girl acted like she didn't even notice. "Wait, you're turning it down?"

  "I can't leave Akamu or my dad," I shouted over the sound of the rain. "A condition of the contract is that I record the album with one of their producers in L.A."

  "But Kai," she said slowly, searching my face. She didn't say anything after that. She just stood there, her blue dress sticking to her skin and her face bright with raindrops.

  "I know."

  I saw her mouth moving but I could no longer hear the words. I thought she said, "It's not fair."

  "It is what it is," I shouted. "Will you get out of the rain? I don't want to be the guy who brings you home to Garrett dying of pneumonia. That guy may be small, but I reckon he could kick my ass."

  She smiled at that, but her eyes remained sad. After a beat, she stepped forward under the shelter of the awning and clutched at her ar
ms.

  "See, now you're cold."

  "I'm fine."

  I raised my eyebrows. Her teeth were just about rattling out of her head. "I live ten minutes away. Take off your shoes and we'll make a run for it."

  She lifted a leg at a time, pulling off her silver heels and dumped them in a nearby garbage bin. "Race you."

  "Get in there," I laughed, throwing open my front door and pushing her through. We'd just run through the middle of town in the pouring rain like two lunatics. Mud splattered our legs and our clothes were plastered to our bodies. I was cold and wet and I hadn't laughed that hard in years.

  "Oh my God," she panted, plucking the fabric of her dress away from her breasts. "This was the absolute worst dress to wear tonight."

  I disagreed.

  She saw the thought cross my face and caught my eye. "Do you want the first shower?" I didn't. I wanted to shower with her.

  "You go first," I managed at last, and she met my eyes with a grin. I had a feeling that she saw right through me. Like she always did.

  I showed her where the bathroom was and passed her a towel. "There's shampoo under the sink and a new bar of soap in the drawer."

  She hovered in the doorway, and I felt her eyes traveling over my chest, up my neck, along my jaw to my mouth. "Have you got something I can change into?"

  I disappeared into my bedroom and found her a t-shirt that I knew would come down to her knees. "Will this work?"

  She took it from me and glanced over her shoulder into the bathroom before closing the door.

  I leaned against the wall and waited until I heard the water turn on. And I tried hard not to imagine her on the other side of that door, peeling the dress away and sliding her underwear down her legs.

  By the time I made it out of the shower she was in my kitchen making grilled cheese sandwiches. My t-shirt gaped at her neck, slipping over a bare shoulder when she leaned down to butter the bread. It didn't come down to her knees. I wished that it would.

  "Hi!" she said brightly. "I got hungry. Sorry. I thought I'd made us a snack while my dress dries."