by Sammie Joyce
“I have to go,” I finally managed to stutter and Kendra nodded.
“Thank you for all your help,” she said earnestly. “You’re the only healer that bothers to show herself during our migration.”
Her kind words gave me a modicum of happiness although I was slightly disgruntled to hear that.
“We’re all part of the same tribe. It’s my duty to protect you.”
Kendra shrugged.
“Not everyone feels the same way. It seems that most are selfish these days, doesn’t it?”
I didn’t know how to respond. I was so far removed from everything that was happening beyond my world. I knew that the shifters I oversaw cared deeply for one another but I couldn’t speak to other herds and packs.
“Well I’m not everyone.” Kendra smiled at my response.
“Let me get you some food and water for your journey back. Even if the weather holds, it’s a walk.”
I didn’t refuse her offer and while she and the other cows foraged for me, I helped the bulls collect dry firewood for the caves.
We regrouped and I thanked her, slinging my pack around my neck again before morphing into my deer form and heading back toward my home, but not without a final look around for Ruben.
Again, I was left with no sight of the bull who had turned me into this strange version of myself.
Why is it that the return home is always faster than the journey there? Is it the anticipation of what you might find on your destination that makes it seem so much longer on the way in? Whatever the reason, I felt like coming home was done in half the time, even with my heavy tread.
Happily, I didn’t chance upon anyone I knew as I entered my shifters’ territory. I wasn’t sure I’d have it in me to chat up anyone that day. I wanted nothing more than to make it back to the sanctuary of my cottage, run a hot bath and get a proper sleep before tackling my duties for the shifters. It was spring again, the time for broken bones and cuts. Everyone was out of hibernation now and would be demanding so much more of my time.
I hoped that no one had been looking for me during the past week. I hadn’t exactly left word that I was going; my impulse to find Ruben overriding my sense of duty.
It’s probably for the best that you didn’t find him, I thought, shaking my head at the realization. He’s already distracting you from your work. What if he was here in front of your face?
I clung to that, deciding that it was a good thing that Ruben had escaped me, even though I didn’t entirely believe it. Even the spirits hadn’t given me any answers. The universe was telling me that we weren’t meant to be together after all.
Up through the woods, down a beaten path I galloped, stretching my legs one last time in a run as I neared my home. Despite my tiredness, it felt incredible to experience the rush of fresh wind across my fur, the smell of good air flowing through me.
As my cottage came into view, I froze in my tracks. The hairs on the back of my graceful neck rose in apprehension although I wasn’t sure what it was that had struck me at first.
My nose raised into the air and cautiously, I stepped forward, sensing that something was amiss, but what? What was bothering me?
It wasn’t until I stood on my property line, hoof lifted to bolt at the first sign of danger, that I saw the front door was slightly ajar.
My brow furrowed. I had no doubt that I’d closed it before I’d left. There had never been a lock on the cottage—there had been no need. Even though the shifters in the compound knew where I lived, I had the utmost faith in all of them. I couldn’t imagine anyone stepping foot into my home uninvited, not even Flint who sometimes liked to surprise me with an arrival. Even he had enough respect to stay away if I wasn’t there.
But someone had been in my home, among my delicate potions and concoctions, among my well-preserved and painstakingly picked herbs. The question was, were they still there?
My immediate thought was Kea Mahelona, the woman that Flint had warned me about before I’d left to find Ruben. Had she somehow found me, despite Flint’s assurances that he wouldn’t tell?
Swallowing a thick knot of concern in my throat, I inched forward, gently lowering my hooves until I stood at my porch. I had a decision to make—to stay in my animal body or shift into my human form. If I shifted back, I could easily throw a shroud of protection around myself if someone was inside but in my caribou frame, I wouldn’t be able to. Not only that but my deer body was much heavier than my delicate mortal shape. I would sound like a herd of elephants if I walked on the wooden porch, thereby alarming anyone else who might be inside. On the other hand, I could run away much faster as a deer.
I waited again, sniffing wildly at the air again for a clue as to who might be inside but I was getting nothing but mounting anxiety.
You can’t sit out here all day, I hissed at myself. Make a decision!
It was enough of a pep talk to get me to shift and grabbing a shawl from the coat rack inside the front door, I crept into my house as silently as possible. My heart was pounding and dizziness overcame me. I couldn’t think of the last time I’d been afraid. I had to force myself to breathe normally, knowing that having a panic attack wasn’t going to help matters in the least.
To my relief, no one was in the kitchen or living room. I saw no remnants of a break in or any disruption to my belongings. I gently closed the door in my wake, turning to wrap the thin material over my body as I tried to make sense of what I was seeing.
Had I merely left the door open in my haste to leave?
The idea filled me with embarrassment, but judging by the untouched nature of my house, I had no reason to believe that anyone had genuinely been there.
“Foolish,” I muttered to myself, finally feeling my pulse slowing as I accepted that I had scared myself. I moved toward the bathroom, remembering the bath that had been calling my name for days. My legs were aching and I was insurmountably tired, two facts that probably hadn’t helped my paranoid thoughts. In the bathroom, I turned on the faucets, waiting for the hot water to run before turning toward my small bedroom for fresh clothes.
I pushed open the door and gasped, reeling back in shock as I saw the outline of someone lying in my bed. From where I stood, the slight rays of sun poking through the drawn window, I saw a scruffy stranger, one leg falling off the bed, his arm tucked under a pillow as he snored.
Oh Goldilocks, I thought, terrified. Someone’s been sleeping in your bed.
Before I could stop myself, I opened my mouth and screamed loudly enough to shatter the crystal palaces in London.
6
Rueben
My eyes flew open at the horrific sound, the first real noise I’d heard in days. Without stopping to think, I was out of the bed, growling in preparation of a fight but as the fuzz cleared, I realized that I was the one at fault. Uncomprehendingly, I saw Larissa standing in the doorway of the bedroom, her jaw slacked as she continued to howl in indignation. Instinctively, I reached out toward her, in my mind a semblance of comfort, in hers, an even bigger threat. Even before I could form a word from my own lips, however, she whirled around, a chant falling from her lips as she sprinted forward but I finally found my voice and yelled out for her to stop. I knew she was trying to cast a spell to ward me off and that was really the last thing I wanted. All I wanted was to be closer to her. That’s what I’d been hoping for all week.
At first, I’d tried to ignore the overwhelming desire I’d had for her, but as the days passed and I continued on with the other bulls, I realized that I wasn’t going to be able to dismiss the feelings I had for Larissa even as I tried to pursue my calling. I knew I wouldn’t be able to concentrate until I saw her again. Simply being away from her had done something to me that I didn’t understand. I’d never felt the need to be so close to someone before.
But there she was, trying to cast me back with magic.
“Wait!” I cried, realizing how close she was to succeeding at what she was doing. “You don’t need to do that! I’m not
here to hurt you!”
Her step faltered but she continued to chant, not trusting my words—not that I could blame her. After all, I was half naked, in her bed. I would be more than slightly alarmed if the roles were reversed. It hadn’t been my intention to be asleep when she returned, but it had been so boring waiting around for her. If I’d know where she’d gone, I would have headed out after her. I figured her home would be the safest place to find her again.
“I’ve been waiting for you, Larissa,” I told her when she still didn’t cease with her spell. With those words, she finally stopped the ancient chant and whipped her head around, eyes narrowed in suspicion. A combination of consternation and uncertainty filled her eyes.
“How do you know my name?” she demanded furiously. “Who the hell are you and why are you in my house?”
Even as she spoke, I saw her eyes trailing over my shirtless chest, taking in my muscular body as she struggled to understand what was happening. The feel of her eyes on me send a fission of warmth through my body. The feeling I’d had when I’d first seen her was still as strong—no, actually, it was stronger now that I was in my mortal form somehow, maybe because I was speaking openly with her. As her gaze traveled along my bare chest and across my abs, back up toward my face, I thought I saw a glimmer of recognition in her eyes.
“I’m Ruben. Ruben Soto-Rivera.”
She gasped but there was less surprise in her face that I had expected.
“We met at—” I continued but she cut me off, nodding almost eagerly.
“I know who you are,” she breathed, her shoulders sagging slightly. “I thought I recognized you but I wasn’t sure.”
I gave her a half-smile and reached toward her again.
“I know now that we’re fated to be together,” I told her, extending my arms to embrace her. To my utter shock, she backed away, holding up her hands, the smile fading from her lips.
“Stay back,” she barked.
I blinked, my own pleasure short-lived as I scowled slightly.
“Why? You know I’m right. I know you felt the connection between us. I read it on your face.”
She scoffed slightly, folding her arms over her chest.
“And you thought that gave you the right to break into my house?” she retorted. My mouth parted but no words came out as I stared at her. She sighed, again giving me a once-over, barely able to hide the desire in her eyes.
Why is she fighting me?
“I told you—I’m here looking for you,” I replied slowly, wondering if she somehow missed what I was telling her. “I came here for you.”
“You broke in,” she reminded me. I grunted, my own arms finding their way across my own chest to match her stance.
“You have nothing to fear from me,” I assured her. “I just want to get to know you.”
Her eyebrows raised almost to her hairline as she studied me, this time her gaze firmly on my face like she was trying to gauge the sincerity of my words. I found myself getting protective, my eyes becoming slits too. For a long moment, we stared at one another. Abruptly, she sauntered toward me, digging through her closet as she pulled out a couple items. Turning back to me, she handed me a robe and a pair of linen pants. I didn’t know what to say.
“Are you hungry?” she asked unexpectedly. “I’ll make some tea and something to eat.”
Again, she was moving, this time back toward the door. It was only then that I heard the sound of water rushing and I realized that she had been running a bath before finding me there.
I really did catch her off guard, I thought with some regret, but I still couldn’t understand her reaction. It seemed to me that she should be happier to see me. I started to deny that I wanted anything but she moved further down the hall, leaving me no choice but to dress and follow after her.
I quickly threw on the pants and cinched the robe at my waist, running my hand through the mop of dark hair that desperately needed a brushing. If I’d known she’d be home that day, I would have showered in anticipation.
Maybe that’s her problem—you’re a mess.
This was not going how I had expected at all. Given the way we’d first met, the way she’d looked at me, I had envisioned a much different first encounter, one that had been fueled by the primitive desire that had driven me to seek out her cottage and wait for days on end for her return. Any other female—shifter or otherwise—would have thrown themselves at me, I’m sure, if they’d been in her position, but Larissa was acting…what? Defensive? Annoyed?
She had already lit a fire by the time I joined her in the living room, a feat that I had admit impressed me. It was clear that she’d been on her own for a long while and used to doing things by herself.
She didn’t say a word as she busied herself in the small cottage kitchen, chopping vegetables and pulling out pans to create a meal. I hadn’t even realized I was hungry until I could smell olive oil on the hot skillet and my stomach churned dangerously. For days, I had resorted to foraging in the woods, not wanting to help myself to her stuff, but I hadn’t eaten very well, my nerves blocking me somewhat.
Larissa nodded toward the sofa, indicating for me to sit down. For a minute, I thought about refusing, about standing my ground, but I knew that would just create more friction between us.
“Where are you from, Ruben?” she asked, finally breaking the uncomfortable silence between us.
“Northwestern Canada. The Yukon,” I explained. Her expression registered surprise.
“They were right then,” she muttered, more I thought, to herself than me.
“Who was?”
“The herd you traveled with,” she replied, turning her attention back to the food. It smelled delicious, the aromas filling the small cabin in no time and it took me everything I had not to lick my lips openly. I couldn’t wait to see what she was making.
How long has it been since I’ve had a home cooked meal?
For months, I’d lived off the staples of migration, a diet that wasn’t entirely suiting me. I’d lost ten pounds already, and while it didn’t make me skinny, I missed the extra meat on my body.
“I don’t usually come with the herd,” I told her, settling back as she took the kettle off the fire.
“I know you don’t,” Larissa replied, surprising me. She caught my expression and gave me a hasty smile. “I greet the herds every spring. I would have remembered you.”
I gave her a charming grin of my own.
“Anyway, this is a first for me. It was a long trip.”
“Why would you do it? You have everything you need up there,” she asked pouring the steaming water into a teapot. “I’ve never seen a shifter migrate from so far away.”
The smell of jasmine and honey wafted up and I wondered if she made the tea herself. The mere scent of it was calming and it was unlike anything I’d ever smelled before.
Looking around the quaint house, I suspected that Larissa was a woman of many talents, tea-making the least of which.
“I have a message,” I replied slowly. “One that I need to share with the other shifters.”
If the enigma of my words startled her, Larissa didn’t show it on her face. Her focus was on the tea and then on the meal in the kitchen.
“What sort of message?” she asked, almost sounding bored. For some reason, her tone bothered me, like she was dismissing me without even knowing how important my words were.
“Tell me about what you’re doing out here by yourself. Never mind me.”
A grimace formed on her mouth.
“What?”
I’d managed to irritate her again. I could already tell but I had no idea how.
Maybe I’m wrong about her. Maybe she’s not my mate. I’m starting to get the impression she doesn’t even like me very much.
Slowly, I enunciated the words.
“Tell…me…about…you,” I said deliberately. Her eyes flashed and she grunted.
“No, I heard you demanding to know about me,” she countered. “I
just thought maybe you’d want to rephrase that as a less intrusive question rather than an order.”
I almost laughed but I realized I was getting angry. For some reason, she was making me jump through hoops to get to know.
Did I really waste all this time here waiting for her? I could have been spreading my warning to by now instead of hanging out here.
I swallowed my reservations and tried again.
“Why don’t you tell me about yourself, Larissa?” I choked, forcing myself to sound lighthearted even though I wanted to snap at her. She didn’t look impressed by my rewording, but to her credit, she ambled toward the small kitchen table, two full plates in hand. She nodded toward the chair, dictating that our meal was ready.
I rose from my spot on the couch and made my way to where she’d laid out a plate, my eyes widening in appreciation.
The meal looked as amazing as it smelled, the rosemary seasoned vegetables and glazed carrots steaming as I sat. She placed a plate of freshly baked rolls at the center of the table next to a slab of pure butter.
“All locally sourced,” she told me as she watched me take in the feast. This time, I didn’t hold back running my tongue over my lower lip as I reached for a fork.
“Well?” I asked after taking in a forkful of mouth-watering potatoes. I don’t know how she had infused them with cheese but I was sure I’d never tasted anything so divine in my life. It was positively otherworldly.
I could get used to this.
“Well what?” Larissa asked, her brows knitting in confusion.
“I asked nicely. Will you please tell me about yourself?” The edge that I’d been feeling lifted slightly, the warm food in my belly tempering my feelings somewhat. Maybe that’s why I’d been so grumpy in the first place—I’d been hungry.
Larissa was quiet, her eyes shadowing slightly as she chewed. Before she answered me, she pushed a wooden bowl of salad toward me and I eagerly took it. I wasn’t sure she’d made enough. I was sure I was going to eat everything in sight.
