Crazy With You

by E. H. Lyon

  She enjoys my remark. Harper throws her dress on over her body. “Show me the rest of the house?”

  I nod and lead her back into the house as she walks barefoot. Walking into the open kitchen, my arms come out and I start my spiel.

  “Kitchen has been updated a year ago. Stainless-steel appliances. It is quite small, but practical.”

  “I don’t cook. So, location is key. Need to be near takeout. Not all of us have someone waiting at home cooking for them like you do.” She smiles as her fingers glide along the counter.

  “Hmm surprises me, you strike me as a home baker type of person, and I don’t have anybody waiting to cook for me, as you figured out last night.” My eyes are certainly piercing in on her.

  A satisfied grin flashes across her face. “Oh yeah, true, you asked for my number last night.” An eyebrow raises. Something tells me she enjoys stating that fact. “Besides, I am more the ‘make your own cocktail’ type of person than baking.”

  My face lights up. “Really? You’re into mixology?”

  She nods yes, and I am in heaven. Making cocktails is my hobby, it’s my jam. For years, I have been getting friends buzzed on Max’s Manifesto, my signature cocktail.

  We walk farther along the pristine white hall. She should be following me, but I can’t help but follow her as she struts slowly through the hall towards the bedroom like she already owns the place.

  Eye on the game, man, not her hard nipples that I can see through her clingy dress.

  I clear my throat. “Two bedrooms, master has its own bath with rain shower.”

  She stops as she enters the master bedroom. “So how many houses will you and I be seeing together?” It rolls off her tongue and it’s sensual. This can’t be my ears.

  I bite my inner cheek to keep me in check. “I guess as many as it takes.”

  Her face forms a smile. “Sounds like this will be a fun adventure,” she tells me.

  I can’t help but let a chortle escape me. “If jumping into pools when I open a door is any indication, then yeah, sounds like I’m in for a real treat.”

  I watch her as she circles the room slowly, eyeing the bed.

  Neutral topic, Max, neutral topic.

  “Should we check out the garage?” I manage.

  She smiles to herself. “Sure.”

  After showing her the rest of the house, we’re on the driveway staring at each other. It’s a hot summer day and the sun is shining fully.

  “What did you think of the house?” I ask as I throw my sunglasses on.

  Harper looks at the front of the house. “I mean, it’s nice, good layout, and right size. Just didn’t feel a connection.”

  “A connection?” I’m now wondering if her eccentric personality is going to spit out some voodoo bullshit of why the feng-shui of the house was all wrong.

  “Yeah, you know, when two things or people seem to click. Have a magnetic pull.” Harper says these words and they float in the air as she eyes me up and down.

  Looking away, I can’t help but smile at this woman who has been dropped into my life.

  “Okay, Harper, I guess then we will see another house tomorrow.”

  Harper leans against her forest-green Jeep Wrangler. This chick seems to have a lot of confidence.

  “Right. As many as it takes,” she reminds me of what I said earlier, and something tells me she’s now playing a game.

  I bite my lip and wonder where to take this.

  “There are two houses we can see tomorrow, is that okay?” Just keep it professional.

  “Yeah, sounds good. Promise I won’t jump into any pools. I’ll be on my best behavior,” Harper informs me as she opens her car door.

  I grab her door, “Lucky me,” then close it for her. Standing there as she drives off.

  How I survived that appointment, I do not know. I haven’t had to try and focus that hard since prepping for my Bar Mitzvah and that was twenty years ago.

  I get into my car, and when I’m on my way, I say “Two” into my car phone system. Because, well, speed dial one is reserved for my mom, obviously. Two is Jess, my work wife if you will, business partner and friend. Purely that.

  “Jess, where did you find this chick? She is batshit crazy,” I speak in my car as I drive with an amused look slapped across my face. The speakerphone is on as I focus on the road. Because, you know, safety first.

  “Harper? Nah. She’s just free-spirited,” Jess explains. I can imagine she’s sitting on the other end twisting some of her dark red hair with a puzzled look.

  “I don’t know what you’re up to, but I know Sam doesn’t have chicken pox, so why did you tell Harper that I needed to fill in for you? She was supposed to be your appointment.” I am a little steamy, because I now have to test my restraint power which may be a challenge.

  An almost evil laugh comes through the speaker. “Because, Max, you need to lighten up and have a little fun.”

  Is she kidding me now? I am a barrel of fun. Out of everyone in our friend group, I still have people coming up to me about the parties I threw at my house when we were in our twenties.

  “Jess, really?” It comes out mundane.

  “Come on, Max. I just mean, you have been a little slow in the romance department lately. Harper seemed like she would be a good match.”

  “Except I don’t date clients and you know that,” I remind her.

  A hmm escapes her. “Then find her a house ASAP. I sent you all her information.”

  “Right. All I know is she’s into yoga, swims in pools, and wears black lace like a second skin,” I speak aloud.

  “Say what? How do you know that?” Jess asks, intrigued.

  “She jumped into the swimming pool of the house on Pine Lane.” There is disdain in my voice, because, although fun, it’s a little crazy.

  Jess now laughs hysterically. “Oh, this is great.”

  “Anyhow, Jess. I need to get to my next appointment. Can you arrange two viewings for me tomorrow? Probably Mills Lane and Second Street. They seem like they would fit the bill for a chick into yoga,” I explain as I turn into the driveway of my next appointment.

  “Sure. But you do realize that Harper does more than yoga, right?”

  “I don’t, actually. Never got to ask her what she actually does,” I mention as I park my car.

  “She’s a kindergarten teacher.”

  Fuck me senseless.

  Not only is Harper my princess fantasy come true, she’s also a sexy schoolteacher? What magical mystical being created all my fantasies rolled into one? This is too damn good to be true.

  I groan through clenched teeth.

  “Also, please treat her as VIP. Her father owns that IT company that is looking to move their offices here. If that’s the case, then my guess is we’ll have a lot of clients that may need a house,” Jess adds.

  “Great.” I don’t at all mean it.

  Ending the call, I let out a deep exhale.

  I’m going to need a giant Max’s Manifesto when I get home. Not only is Harper a client, but she hasn’t left my mind in the 22 minutes and 37 seconds since I saw her.

  Repeat, Max. Do not sleep with your client.

  Chapter Two

  Harper

  I throw a red gummy bear into my mouth as I hold my phone in my other hand and look at the screen.

  “You are 27 and still eat kiddy vitamins?” my brother Josh asks on the other end of the screen. He looks like he’s sitting in his office with perfect hair and collared shirt.

  “It is the breakfast of heroes. So, yes,” I reply, as the vitamins are a must in my profession. I quickly look around my apartment. The coffee table is covered with popsicle sticks, glitter, and little craft eyeballs. I was trying to make little creatures for my adorable monsters who will start in my kindergarten class in a few weeks for the new school year.

  “When should I plan my visit? I can swing in for a weekend or maybe stop by on my way back from California.” My brother lives in Chicago and is t
he golden child of our family. He has a successful marketing firm, while I went into teaching.

  Teaching is an honorable profession, and while I may not make enough money to go first-class on a trip to Aruba, I can’t complain. My parents find my profession “cute” as they call it and paid for my college and are now willing to help me buy a house.

  I shrug, “I guess next month. Hopefully, I have my new place by then. This rental is charming, but not suitable for guests. Although you tend to stay at hotels anyways, so it doesn’t matter. Just come when you want.”

  “I will check with my PA then plan something. How is the house search?”

  I gently laugh to myself. “Entertaining.” Oh boy is it ever. I’m luckier than the leprechaun on the Lucky Charms cereal box. My real estate agent is eye candy and I want to have him for breakfast instead of my gummy bear vitamin.

  My brother must pick up on my change of face. “Care to explain?”

  “The real estate agent… well, he is… interesting.”

  Josh looks at me entertained. “Uh oh.”

  “Well, I’m not complaining he’s the one showing me houses. Maybe I can convince him to buy me a drink.” I flash my eyes.

  Looking at the clock, I know I need to head outside in a minute. Max had texted asking if we could go in his car as it’s easier to go between houses with one vehicle.

  I head to the mirror near my front door of my small simple rental apartment. My fingers fluff my black hair and I straighten my blue summer dress that matches my nails.

  “Okay, big bro, I need to head. I will fill you in on the hopefully good gossip later,” I smile.

  “Fine. But don’t be too crazy. Not all guys dig that,” he reminds me before we hang up.

  I know some consider me a little eccentric at times, I prefer free-spirited. Some perceive it as crazy. I’m not crazy.

  I repeat, I am not crazy.

  No—I live life to the fullest. I was a handful for my parents, but they always respected my personality and accepted that I would be the one to liven up any boring family dinner.

  I’m unique.

  This philosophy is also why I am standing as a confident soul in the summer sun, smiling as Max pulls up in his car.

  Immediately, I walk to his car and open the front passenger door then slide in.

  “Good morning,” he greets me with a grin.

  “Morning,” I say and then hold a hand up. “Promise. Good behavior today.”

  He laughs gently as we drive away.

  Quickly, I scan his car. Clean, leather, and new. His music selection, I can’t figure out as it’s too quiet. Then my eyes land on him as he is focused on the road. I admire the deep features on his face; hazel eyes, chiseled nose, and clean shaven. His cologne is slightly overpowering, but I like when my senses are kept attuned. The turquoise short-sleeve button-down with a collar is gaining him points too.

  “So, I’m curious, Harper. Did you know who I was when we met at Matchbox?” The subtle slant of his mouth as he asks is delicious. Not quite a smile, but enough for me to know he’s entertained. My name rolling off his tongue sends a firework or two through me.

  “Actually no.” It’s true.

  “Hmm. Coincidence.” He grins, and it makes me smile softly.

  “But I guess you got my number in the end… like you wanted,” I taunt with a sly smile.

  He looks at me briefly and licks his lips, still grinning. “True.”

  My eyes look out the window to admire nature. High trees, winding road, a river down at the bottom of the banks. “You’re lucky to have grown up here,” I comment.

  He glances at me and his lips quirk. “I think so. Where are you from?”

  “I grew up in Connecticut. But I wanted something new. I thought about Oregon, maybe even Austin, but Sage Creek, Colorado won. Plus, the school systems around here are great. I love that the classes are small and parents seem involved.” And I needed to start fresh. Otherwise, I would have always been reminded of the mess I left behind. But Max doesn’t need to know that.

  “A kindergarten teacher, right?”

  “Yep. They are curious little creatures at that age, but a lot of work.”

  Max focuses as he parks the car and only then do I realize we pulled up to a small two-story house that is painted gray. He turns to me as he shuts the engine off, and his eyes feel like they’re studying me, or maybe he’s retracing my body as he already saw me half-naked.

  A great move on my part.

  “We’re here,” he mentions as our eyes meet. Our eyes hold and my body may have forgotten how to breathe.

  “Shall we look?” I manage to ask softly.

  Max clears his throat as he breaks our gaze. My guess is his body reacted the same as mine.

  And that reaction is a doozy.

  We both get out of the car and walk to the front door. I like the cozy feel of the house. A little porch outside with a bench, and when we step inside, a clean white finish to light wood floors.

  “Before you ask, yes, it’s real wood.” He smiles at me.

  “Nice. I also like the open staircase near the front door,” I comment as we walk farther into the house. I follow him and listen as he explains the features to various aspects of the house. The house was built in the 80s and was recently refurbished. A fireplace in the living room. The house isn’t too big and is just the right size for me.

  When we stand in the kitchen and look out the window to the back, I notice the green grass and patio.

  “No pool. Guess I won’t be getting that kind of wet today,” I tell him casually as my eyes roll to him, and he draws in a breath as it catches him off guard.

  He bites his inner cheek, and his dimples appear as he tries not to show me his smile. But I hope his mind is spinning with thoughts on how he could make me wet today.

  I’m not shy for stating the obvious or saying what I want. This man maybe needs to be eased into the idea, because I really want to sink my teeth into him.

  Max moves us swiftly on and we continue on the tour. I ask him about his family.

  “I’m close with my mother. We talk almost daily. My father passed a few years back.”

  My hand reaches out to softly touch his arm out of instinct. “Oh. I’m sorry.”

  “It’s okay. It’s life. But I have a great group of friends and life is good now.”

  I don’t move my hand as his arm feels warm and hard. He doesn’t strike me as the workout type, but he has some muscle happening.

  “Just no girlfriend?”

  He looks at my hand. “Not yet.” It comes out low and soft. I hope it was a subtle hint that I am a contender, because there is something about this guy that is a spark that I’ve never experienced.

  Our eyes flick up to settle on one another again.

  “So… the house. Like it?”

  I don’t not like it, but I don’t want to wrap this day up. “You mentioned another property?”

  “Yes. We can see a property not far from Matchbox, actually. But they could only schedule us in for a little later.”

  “I would like to see it.”

  His lips tug. “Okay. What about we grab some lunch until it’s time?”

  My droll smile is failing me in my calm and confident approach. “You have some great ideas, Maximus Katz.” I have no clue what Max is short for, but I hope to find out.

  It makes him smile and we head out.

  We’re sitting at Smokey Java’s, a great little gem of a bakery and café combined into one. It was just refurbished a few weeks ago with a fresh floor and hanging plants. Industrial vibes, yet the place feels quaint due to the impressive display of cakes and cookies.

  “Thanks for taking me here. I love their brownies,” I say right before biting into a piece of chocolate heaven, and I seem to have an audience of one.

  “I like your salad and brownie approach. I normally don’t eat too many sweets,” Max comments as he bites into his own brownie.

  My hands slam onto
the table for theatrics. “I can’t talk to you anymore. What kind of soul doesn’t like sweets? Cookies literally make the world go round.”

  His mouth slants into a half-smile. “Hey, you’re already convincing me to head over to the dark side, so relax,” he assures me.

  “Phew. Besides, cookies and salad are called balance.” I look at him and enjoy looking at him.

  Over salad, I learned he has an older sister who lives out east. He isn’t into sports but will watch hockey. His mother sends him home with lots of meals every time he visits her. And he is close with his friends.

  But I want to unravel more. What does his habitat look like? What does he look for in a mate? And yes, I realize I am looking at him like an animal, but I want to do wild things to him, and I hope he can do wild things to me.

  “I really appreciate that you’re showing me the houses. Jess mentioned that you normally work on the selling side.” I take a sip of my water.

  He adjusts his position and a charming smile spreads across his face. “No problem. My pleasure, really. It’s not every day I get to show a beautiful woman around.”

  Immediately, my eyes look up at him and a smile forms on my face. He realizes what he just said, and I can see his mind is trying to catch up with his words. I love that I’m making him struggle with his ability to speak.

  My confidence is restored, and I lean back in my chair, deciding to throw on my flirtatious voice. “It’s not every day that I get to have a handsome man showing me around.”

  He looks at me and gently shakes his head at my reply. We look at each other and I think we both know that we’re in trouble.

  There’s a long pause.

  Max takes a deep breath. “Uh, tell me about what you want in a house?” He’s trying to change the topic.

  “Shouldn’t you have asked that before we looked at houses?” I tease him with a smirk.

  “True. But I feel like I need to sail us to safer waters,” he says honestly as his eyes land on mine again and that suave grin of his doesn’t fade.

  “Nah, I’m okay. I enjoy sharks and waves.”

  “Wait.” He leans over the table and his finger reaches out to my collarbone.