His Reckless Heart (The Montgomery Boys Book 1)

by Jessica Mills

  “Holy shit,” I said. “A horse hoof to the hip is no joke. He’s not going to be bouncing back from that anytime soon.”

  Cassidy shrugged. “Probably not. He’s been out for a while, though, and they say he’s making strides.”

  “Maybe not the best choice of words, considering the man is still trying to learn to walk again,” Clayton pointed out.

  “Anyway,” Cassidy said with a glare, “he’ll be back as soon as the ranch hand is in shape again.”

  I ate a few bites of the thick, meaty chili and chased the biting spice down with mouthfuls of the buttery cornbread. I tried to concentrate on the flavors rather than the thoughts rushing through my head and the horrific images the injury brought to mind.

  “Colt is out competing in the rodeo circuit,” Clayton said as if he could sense my descent into the darkness of my thoughts. “He’s been doing pretty well out there.”

  “Really?” I asked. “That’s great. I know he’s been working hard to get up there.”

  Even as I said it, the words didn’t feel genuine. I didn’t really know that, not like my other brothers who had actually experienced him going through the training and preparations knew. All I knew was what was in the letters I got every few weeks while I was away.

  Colt talked about getting ready for competition and the goals he had for himself. They were lofty, but he could get them. He chased things hard and I knew he had it in him to topple every aspiration he put in front of himself.

  My brothers exchanged glances.

  “He already is up there,” Cassidy said. “He’s one of the top competitors and has been making a big name for himself. Everybody around here knows him.”

  The answer felt like a kick to the stomach as I realized I hadn’t paid attention to how long ago I’d gotten those letters. I’d missed everything.

  “Is Garrett with him?” I asked, trying to push past the sinking feeling in my stomach.

  “Who the hell knows?”

  I looked over at Wade. It was his one contribution to the conversation and the way he said it then went right back to eating from his giant bowl of chili was dry but hilarious. It was also probably the most accurate way he could have answered.

  Garrett was known as the bad boy of the eight of us. Everything he did was unpredictable, and it was no surprise none of the rest of them knew where he’d gone or what he was up to. That was just Garrett. Eventually, he’d find his way home. He always did.

  I guessed we all did.

  Chapter 6

  Shannon

  Our outing Sunday evening gave Beau a taste for adventure and he was already sitting expectantly by the door to my apartment when I woke up Monday morning.

  “You want to go to work with me today, buddy?” I asked.

  He tilted his head at me and wagged his tail, thumping it against the floor again.

  “I’ll take that as a yes,” I told him. “Just give me a few minutes to get ready and we’ll head out.”

  I tugged on a pair of jeans and dropped one of my favorite old T-shirts down over my head before brushing my hair back into a ponytail. A quick coat of sunscreen finished me off and prepared me in case that day’s work found me out in the blazing sun more than in the garage.

  When I was ready, I hooked Beau up to his leash and brought him out to the truck. He leapt up into the passenger seat and plopped right down. I secured his leash to the seatbelt to make sure he didn’t take a flying leap out of the window while we were driving. He’d never tried do anything like that before, and I was pretty sure his heft would stop him from getting all the way out, but I didn’t like worrying about him.

  Almost as soon as we got to the mechanic shop, he walked out into the middle of the driveway and slumped down onto the ground. I had to reach under him to disconnect his leash and it was all he could do to give a half-hearted smack of his lips and close his eyes.

  Sunbathing in the middle of the driveway was a pretty challenging responsibility, and I didn’t know if I could compete with it, but there were cars to fix, and I needed to get on them fast if I was going to have any chance of finishing them up that day. That also meant I was going to need more than just hope and determination to get me through.

  I went into the shop building attached to the garage and got a pot of strong coffee brewing. That coffee pot was one of the things I liked to tease my father about. When his trusty old percolator that looked like it dated back to the Model T finally gave up and brewed its last cup, he upgraded to a sleek machine that could either brew a single cup or an entire carafe. He said it added a bit of class to the shop.

  We quickly learned the single cup feature was all but futile. Neither one of us wanted to stand around while the other one brewed a single cup of coffee. Our speed of caffeine consumption in the morning was almost too much for the full carafe to handle. But Dad still insisted on keeping a supply of fancy, flavored coffee pods sitting around just in case somebody came through the shop and suddenly found themselves with a hankering for almond-biscotti-flavored breakfast roast.

  By the time I’d taken down two cups of coffee and had the shop open, Dad pulled into the driveway. Beau didn’t even bother to get out of his way.

  “Morning, Dad,” I said when he got out of the car and came toward me in the garage. “Can I get you a cup of coffee?”

  “Morning, honey. No thanks. I appreciate it, but I’m only dipping in and out. I just need to make a list of all the parts we need. I’m heading over to Crystal Lake to pick them up this morning.”

  Trips over to the neighboring town to pick up parts from their well-stocked auto-supply shop was always preferable to ordering parts online. Clicking through a screen might have been convenient, but it would take longer to have the parts delivered, and sometimes, nothing was a stand-in for actually looking at the parts and making decisions. Besides, Dad liked the drive. It gave him a chance to get out and interact with other people.

  Dad hunched over the counter in the shop, making notes on a piece of paper as he scanned the computer screen.

  I kissed him on the cheek and took my third cup of coffee out of the carafe. “Drive safe.”

  “Always do,” he said.

  Smiling, I headed into the garage to start working. Dad had left, but I hadn’t been working too long when I heard Beau growling in the drive. He wasn’t the type of dog to growl or bark at just anybody. If he had been, there’d be no way I could bring him to work with me. With his size and the deep boom of his bark, if he made a fuss every time somebody got around, he’d scare off all my customers.

  But that told me someone had arrived who he didn’t want anything to do with.

  I walked out of the garage and saw the sheriff’s deputy climbing out of his cruiser. He glared at Beau.

  “You be quiet,” I called to my dog.

  He put his head back down on his front paws, but his eyes stayed locked on Deputy Roy Hayes. I went back into the garage, not feeling like being bothered by him right at that moment.

  “Good morning, Shannon,” Deputy Hayes said as he stepped up into the shade of the garage with me. He tucked his thumbs into his belt and rocked on the heels of his boots, looking around the garage like he’d never seen it before.

  “Deputy,” I said by way of acknowledging him and went back to working on the part sitting on the counter.

  He started a slow walk around the garage, looking at things and making a big show out of checking everything out. “I’m just here to make sure business is going well,” he said. “Checking in on you to make sure you’re okay. Anything you need?”

  I did my best to hold back the face I wanted to make toward him. I knew he wasn’t there on a welfare check for the auto shop. He might genuinely be inquiring about how business was going, but it wasn’t because he had a magnanimous interest in local business.

  In this case, I knew it was more about the business owner. Or more accurately, the business owner’s daughter.

  The deputy has always had a thing for me. It st
arted way back when we were just teenagers and he was never shy about making it obvious. Being with Jesse at the time meant it was easy to duck the attention, but Hayes never completely let up. In fact, after Jesse left me in his rearview mirror, Deputy Hayes tried to convince me to date him. He saw it as the perfect opportunity.

  Which was unfortunate for him because I never saw Roy Hayes as anything other than an absolute ass.

  It definitely didn’t help that he and his family had always gone out of their way to make life hard for the Montgomery boys. I couldn’t bring myself to trust him. There was always something just a little bit off about him that made me uncomfortable being around him. And Beau, who was a very good judge of character, seemed to agree.

  “Well, Deputy, as you can see, business is going very well. I’m tired, and I’m pretty busy today, so I really should be concentrating on my work. But thank you for thinking about us and coming by to check.”

  The deputy seemed to pick up on my not-so-subtle hint that I wasn’t in the mood to talk. Whatever his intention for coming by the shop, he seemed to decide it wasn’t worth continuing to push and turned to leave. He’d taken a few steps when he stopped and turned back around to face me.

  “Have you heard the new rumor in town?” he asked.

  My stomach rolled over, but I didn’t let the expression on my face change. He wanted me to react in some way, to give him the satisfaction of seeing my emotions, and I wasn’t going to do that for him.

  “I try not to listen to the petty gossip in this town,” I said. “It spreads faster than ignorance.”

  Deputy Hayes chuckled. “Well, you aren’t wrong. But still, I thought it might interest you to know word on the street is Jesse Montgomery is back in town.”

  It was a strange dynamic, having him tell me about Jesse as if he was doing me some sort of favor. I still wasn’t going to offer him any particular reaction.

  I shrugged. “Good for him.”

  The deputy’s eyes narrowed just slightly as he evaluated my response. He clearly wanted something more from me. A stronger reaction. Questions. Anything that might tell him how I was feeling about Jesse’s arrival. That was when I realized he wasn’t just telling me about Jesse showing back up in town so he could see how I was going to react. He wanted me to be upset and even heartbroken again so he could be the one to sweep in and comfort me. That definitely wasn’t going to happen.

  “Boys like Jesse are trouble on a good day,” he said. “And after all that time he spent in the service? I doubt he’s the same man he was when he left.”

  There was a suggestive, nudging note in the words. It was almost like he was trying to push me into recognizing something about Jesse, like he was still in competition even though there was no real rivalry between the two men. I kept working even while feeling the Deputy’s eyes burning a hole in me while he watched.

  “I suppose that happens sometimes,” I said.

  “For a lot of those men, you can’t even really trust them anymore when they get back. All that time in the war, fighting and everything, they can’t really be depended on.”

  I glared at Roy and he had the good sense to get out of the conversation while he was still ahead. And by still ahead, I meant I hadn’t yet brained him with a wrench and gone on about my day.

  I hated to admit how much it was getting to me that Jesse was back in town. Evidently, everybody had their own ideas about how it would impact me and if I should know. I almost felt like I was performing. No matter how I reacted to him being there or what I did if I happened to run into him, it would seem like I was just feeding into what other people were expecting of me.

  I walked out into the driveway as the deputy drove off and asked Beau to show me his tummy. He promptly rolled over on his back and let his legs flop open as much as possible. I leaned down and rubbed a belly warm from the driveway.

  “Thank you for trying to warn me Deputy Hayes had shown up,” I told him. “We don’t like having him around, do we?”

  Beau’s tongue unfurled out of the corner of his mouth and I decided I’d take that as a sign of solidarity. Rubbing his tummy for a few more seconds, I headed back into the garage to keep focusing on the work I had in front of me. It was fairly daunting, but I could handle it.

  If nothing else, it would give me something to think about so I didn’t let my mind get completely wrapped around Jesse’s return to Green Valley.

  Chapter 7

  Jesse

  With all the buildup in anticipation of finally being able to climb into bed at the end of the evening, I thought I was in for a fantastic night of sleep. With how exhausted I was and the adrenaline of the trip draining out of me, I thought I’d sleep straight through the night and maybe even halfway through the morning. It turned out the assumption of not getting up until halfway through the morning ended up being correct. But by the time I rolled out of bed at ten on Monday, I had only clocked three or four actual hours of sleep.

  When I first got into bed, I relaxed into the comfortable mattress and crisp clean sheets. But a few minutes later, I realized my brain was still running at full speed and I couldn’t relax.

  I tossed and turned, changing positions, tucking my head under my pillow. I did everything I could to try to convince myself to go to sleep. I even went old school and imagined sheep leaping over my bed so I could count them and hopefully lull myself into oblivion. The herd of imaginary sheep cluttered up the room and numbered in the hundreds by the time I gave up on that.

  It wasn’t until the very early hours in the morning that I finally passed out. Those few hours of rest weren’t nearly enough, but I was up now, and there wasn’t anything to do about it. I couldn’t just spend the rest of the day tossing around in bed hoping to eventually get enough sleep. Maybe I just needed to get used to being home again, used to the different surroundings.

  I threw on a pair of jeans and a white T-shirt before heading downstairs barefoot with a laser focus on finding a cup of coffee and something to eat. The entire house was quiet as I walked down the steps and headed into the kitchen. It was obvious nobody was there. That wasn’t much of a surprise. By that time in the morning, my brothers would have all been gone for several hours and be well into their work for the day. Ranch animals didn’t wait around for anybody.

  Even knowing where they were, I still felt strange roaming around in the empty house. In the back of my mind, I knew that was ridiculous. This house was just as much my home as it was theirs. Even though I’d been away for years and they kept occupying its space, I was just like them. I grew up here and knew it as well as they did. There was no reason I should feel uncomfortable or like I needed them to be there as I figured out life here again.

  Not having my brothers in the house when I woke up did have one distinct benefit. Without them there, they couldn’t say anything to me about taking my breakfast and plopping down on the living-room couch to eat and watch TV.

  It was absolutely my intention to lounge around and do next to nothing for as long as I could get away with it. Not that that was going to be very long. I highly doubted I was even going to be able to get away with being a lazy blob for the rest of the day.

  I wasn’t delusional about the realities of me choosing to come back home. I knew what I was getting myself into and that there were going to be certain expectations I was going to have to live up to. That meant having to get back out on the ranch and help out until I got my footing and figured out where I wanted to go next.

  That by itself was a lot to wrap my head around. When I joined the military, it was with the assumption I was choosing the path for the rest of my life. I believed I would work my way up through the ranks until it was time to retire. But it didn’t work out that way.

  Now, far younger than I ever could have imagined, I was back at the beginning. Life had tossed me backward and I had to start thinking about my future in a completely different way. I had to figure out who I was again. What I was going to do and what I wanted out of life. On tha
t first morning, I had no idea.

  By the time I finished eating and got enough coffee in me to feel awake, I realized I couldn’t just sit around all day. That wasn’t me. I might enjoy being lazy every now and then, but I was hardwired to work and be active. So I washed my breakfast dishes and put them away, then put on my socks and boots before heading outside. I paused on the small covered front porch for a few moments, looking out over the ranch. Then I stepped out into the full late morning sun.

  My first impression as soon as it hit me was it was hot. Very hot. But it was nothing like Afghanistan. That was a kind of heat that seemed like it would melt your bones. The kind of heat that made you want to peel off your skin because it might drop the temperature just a little. It never let up.

  This was the kind I remembered loving as a kid. When I was much younger, I started every morning by getting on the back of a horse and riding across the hills herding cattle. By the time I reached the creek that cut through those hills, the sun was burning down and it was hot enough for me to strip naked and dive into the crystal-clear water to cool off. It was a simple pleasure that brought a few moments of bliss.

  Those were the days.

  I walked around the ranch slowly, taking it all in. Of course, some things had to change in the time I’d been away, but most of it looked familiar. I knew this place like it was part of me, like it was born into me as much as the instinct to walk or breathe.

  When I didn’t find anybody close at the house or in the nearest barns, I went back inside and grabbed a set of keys from the wooden board that hung beside the back door like it always had. I brought them to the garage and found a truck. With the exception of one other car, the rest of the space was empty, coordinating with the empty pegs on the board beside the door.

  I drove the truck up the long dirt drive toward the front of the property and found Clayton there working on a part of the old fence. He stood up and wiped the back of his arm over his forehead as I climbed out of the truck.