by Stacey Lewis
“Actually,” she starts, sounding like I’m the one changing things at the last minute instead of her. “I need you to keep the kids until Friday.”
I love the way she says it like it’s no big deal. She doesn’t bother to ask if she’s inconveniencing me because she doesn’t give a shit if she is or not, she never has. Plus, she knows I won’t refuse because she’ll make it out like I don’t want Ben and Evie around and that’s the opposite of the truth.
“Fine.” Part of me wants to ask why, but I know that’s what she wants so I refrain. She watches me for a few minutes, eyes narrowing when I don't rise to the bait and I can tell it’s killing her that I’m not asking questions.
Telling them goodbye and leaving without looking back is something she’s able to do so easily. I don’t understand it, but I don’t have time right now to think about it either. Now that I have them for an extra two days, I need to get them home and figure out what to feed them.
I keep trying to get Ben to talk about his teachers and the classes he’s taking in seventh grade, but all I get from him on the way to my truck is one-word answers. Getting this kid to engage with me is like pulling teeth. Luckily, Evie has no problem telling us both all about “Ms. Lucas” and all the things she’s going to do this year.
After making sure both kids are in the truck and buckled, I turn to start the car and freeze when I see her getting into her car. So much for trying to talk to her tonight. She doesn’t look at me, but the way her shoulders are hunched slightly forward tells me she can feel my gaze on her. Knowing she’s still just as affected by me as I am her makes me grin as I start the truck.
“Daddy, can we have hamburgers for dinner?” Evie isn’t asking for burgers made at home. She wants a kids' meal with a toy and crappy drive-through burgers.
It will piss Tabitha off when she finds out, but burgers sound good to me, even if the ones I make on the grill taste ten times better than anything we’ll get at a fast food place. Fast food is easy though, and it means I don’t have to stop at a grocery store on the way home. “Sure, sweetheart.” I don’t ask Ben because I know he’ll go along with whatever Evie wants, and he won’t answer me anyway.
We’re just pulling into the parking lot of the apartment I rented after the divorce when I see the same car from the school parking lot. Is she here visiting someone?
My luck fucking sucks. I can’t go say anything to her tonight, and I don’t know when I’ll see her again without my kids.
Mine are racing each other up the stairs, leaving me to carry in all the food when I see her heading up the stairs to the building next to mine holding hands with a boy who looks to be a few years younger than Evie. I can’t see him well because both their backs are to me, but her head is turned towards him and the love on her face is clear.
As much as I want to follow her and see where she’s going, to force her to talk to me, to hear what I have to say, I don’t. I head for my apartment and my kids. Making things clear to Hailey will just have to wait.
Chapter 10
Hailey
When I get to my mom’s to pick up Connor, she has dinner ready and waiting for me to eat. I’m not about to complain because after talking to all the parents and kids I am starving and was so not looking forward to having to figure out what to eat that Connor will agree to.
The smell of mom’s chicken and rice casserole fills the kitchen and as soon as I smell it my stomach growls like I haven’t eaten in a week instead of just a few hours. Mom’s standing at the stove when I walk in and she starts to laugh when she hears the noise my belly is making.
“Hungry much?” she asks, turning to face me and holding two plates in her hands.
I reach over and grab them from her. “Definitely. Spending two hours explaining my teaching methods to parents takes a lot of energy.” Of course, seeing and trying to avoid the man who makes my body, heart, and brain pull in different directions is probably the real reason my energy level is zero. Mom doesn’t need to know that though.
“I’m sure,” she agrees just as my dad walks into the room with Connor on his shoulders. “Eric! Put that child down before he smacks his head on the ceiling fan.”
Dad chuckles and Connor lets loose a belly laugh. “Like I’d let that happen, right Con?” My son continues to laugh, bending forward with my dad so he can pull him off his shoulders and put him on a chair. At first, he acts like he’s going to try to sit him down headfirst which just makes Connor laugh harder.
My heart squeezes at the sight and I wish he had this type of relationship with his dad. Seth hasn’t seen him since the day I left. He hasn’t even attempted to. If it wasn’t for the child support getting deposited every other week I’d wonder if he disappeared off the face of the earth.
Passing me on his way to his chair, dad stops to drop a kiss on the top of my head and wrap an arm around my shoulders to give me a quick hug. “Hey, honey.”
Connor doesn’t even acknowledge my presence when he sees the plate of food in front of him. He’s a picky eater, but the stuff he will eat he scarfs down like he’s just as starved as my stomach sounded a few minutes ago.
While we eat, mom asks about the students I’ll have in my class this year and I try to keep my explanations vague when I mention Evie. Mom doesn’t know about Mitchell or what happened last year. I’m not sure why I didn’t tell her, because I usually tell her everything, but I kept all of that drama to myself. She’s never going to meet him, so it wouldn’t have mattered.
Even my mind doesn’t believe me when I say there won’t be a meeting between Mitchell and my family. The man needs to get the hell out of my head. I’ve already spent so many months mourning what wasn’t meant to be and I’ve moved on from thinking about him in any way. Why did he have to show back up now?
Thankfully, mom doesn’t ask any deep questions about my kids. She’s pretty familiar with the school though because she was the librarian there for many years. In fact, she’s the reason I got the job teaching there. Mom and the principal are good friends, and I know she hired me as a favor to mom. It got my foot in the door so I’m not complaining. I’m going to do everything I can to show them both hiring me was a good decision.
Once we’re finished eating and mom has packed up the leftovers for me to take home it’s time for us to go. Connor’s bedtime is soon and he still needs a bath and some time to chill out. Plus, I want to spend time with just him. He’s been here all day and I’m sure my mom needs a break, even if she’ll never say it. She’s been a godsend since I moved back, keeping Connor until I could find a daycare I was comfortable leaving him at and letting us stay here much longer than I originally planned.
We’ve only been in our new apartment for two weeks. I wanted to move into my own place with enough time to get Connor acclimated before the school year started and things change for him again. He doesn’t do well with change and he’s had so much of it in the past two years.
“Are you sure you don’t want to just spend the night here?”
Mom’s voice is full of concern and I almost relent just to make her feel better. “No, that’s okay. Connor needs to get used to sleeping at our place instead of yours before preschool starts next week.” And I need time alone so I can think about ways to avoid the “conversation” Mitchell wants to have. There can’t possibly be anything he can say I’ll want to hear.
“Okay.” Mom doesn’t sound very sure about my decision, but that’s because she’ll always see me as the little girl running after her brother and coming home with her knees all skinned up instead of a woman who knows her own thoughts and feelings.
Connor chatters all the way across town to our apartment and doesn’t stop until we’re in the living room and he’s been told to get his bath stuff together. He loves playing with toys in the tub still, and he knows if he forgets something he’ll be out of luck.
I let him spend more time in the bath than I normally would, loving the sound of him enjoying himself, and we watch two episodes
of his favorite show before he finally starts yawning and rubbing his sleepy eyes.
The minute he’s in bed and asleep I head for the kitchen and pour the biggest glass of wine I can find before opening my phone to my text app and sending a message to my best friend Riley.
Me: You’ll never guess who I saw at school tonight
Riley: Who???
Me: Mitchell
Not even five minutes go by before there’s a loud knock on my door. She doesn’t stop banging on it until I pull it open and glare. “Are you trying to wake up Connor?”
“Sorry.” She doesn’t sound it all when she breezes past me straight into the kitchen to grab her own full glass of wine. She makes herself comfortable on the couch and waits for me to do the same before she starts her interrogation. “Where did you see him?”
I tell her all about seeing him in my classroom and how I’m going to be teaching his daughter and a big grin lifts her full lips the more I talk. “This is fantastic.”
“Out of everything I said, that’s all you’ve got to say? What part of this mess is fantastic?” I don’t give her the chance to answer before I do it for her. “None of it, that’s what.”
Riley rolls her eyes. “Bullshit. You’ve been mooning over this guy for months. I think you should hear what he has to say.”
My mouth gapes open with shock. “Seriously? You think I should hear what some guy who almost kissed me while he was married has to say? Who are you and what did you do with my best friend?”
I can’t believe she thinks I should listen to anything he has to say. Shouldn’t my best friend have my interests at heart? It seems like she’s on his side, and that thought hurts.
“You never know,” she says with a shrug. “It’s been a year, things could’ve changed a lot since the last time you saw him.”
Who cares if they have? “Even if something has changed, he’s still a cheater.”
Now she rolls her eyes. “Hails, is he really? I mean, you didn’t actually do anything, right? He backed off… and he told you he was married. A scumbag slimeball would have taken advantage of the situation and you, but he didn’t. Doesn’t that at least buy you listening to him say whatever it is he needs to? If nothing else, it will give you some closure.”
I glare at her, mad that she’s making sense when I wanted her to tell me I’m right and I should ignore him forever if possible. “I don’t like you.”
“No, you don’t like when I’m right.” My glare deepens, but she just laughs. “Look, I’m just saying, maybe you should talk to him. Let him say whatever it is he wants to say and then make a decision. Maybe after you’ll at least be able to teach his kid without wanting to throw up every time you see him.”
Ugh. “Damn you and your logic.” She doesn’t reply, just stares at me with one eyebrow raised and a knowing look in her eyes. “Fine, you win. I’ll talk to him, but I don’t think it’s going to solve anything. Nothing can change the fact that he was married when I first met him, but maybe whatever he has to tell me will make me feel better about everything.”
Riley smiles triumphantly and bounces out of her seat with an amount of glee I don’t understand, but I don’t get to ask because after giving me a quick kiss on the cheek she’s gone, leaving me sitting in the living room of my new apartment and contemplating the possibility that maybe I was wrong about Mitchell to begin with… and not in a bad way.
Chapter 11
Mitchell
I’ve tossed and turned all night, so when my alarm goes off I feel like absolute dog shit and all I want is to go back to sleep for eight more hours. Unfortunately, being the boss means I can’t do that, so once my mom shows up to stay with kids I head for the shop to get my day started.
I’ve only been at work an hour when Nick comes into the office with a pissed off look on his face. “There’s someone here to see you.” The attitude he has about has me intrigued.
“Who is it?”
He just shakes his head and leaves, letting the person walk in as he does and I stare at her in shock. Before she can say anything, I stand and walk around my desk to stand in front of her, almost unable to believe she’s standing here.
“Hailey?”
Looking uncomfortable, her eyes dart around my office, focusing on anything but me. I want to grab her and force her to look at me, wanting to see her eyes when she tells me why she’s here, and I have to shove my hands in my pockets to keep from doing it.
“Hey,” she says softly, tucking her hair behind one ear so it won’t fall in her face.
She still hasn’t looked at me, so I lean back on my desk, hoping the pose is casual enough to alleviate some of her nervousness. Towering over her definitely isn’t going to help.
A few minutes go by and the quietness in the room starts to become stifling. I want to give her whatever time she needs, but I can’t stand the awkward silence anymore.
“What are you doing here? Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy you’re here… I just don’t know why you’re here.”
As soon as I say the words I want to kick myself for sounding like a desperate idiot. Why can’t I keep my mouth shut around her?
Her voice is barely audible when she replies. “You said you wanted to explain, so I’m here to listen.”
I can’t disguise my shock. Yesterday she was adamant she wasn’t interested in anything I had to say. Now she’s here telling me to explain things to her. I guess I shouldn’t question it, but I sort of want to. It seems too good to be true.
“Hailey,” I say her name, not sure where I want to start. I didn’t anticipate having this conversation, and if I’m honest I don’t want to have it here. This room is so small, and there’s an entire building full of my employees on the other side of it. There’s almost no privacy either.
“This isn’t the right place for this,” I finally tell her. She looks up at me questioningly, and I try to explain my reasoning. “I’d rather have this conversation somewhere we have at least a semblance of privacy.” Throwing out a hand, I gesture to the room outside my office. “The chances of someone eavesdropping at the door over there are high, and I don’t think either of us want that to happen.”
She looks shocked like she can’t believe she didn’t think of that herself, and a blush heats her face. There’s no reason for her to be embarrassed, but she doesn’t give me the chance to tell her that.
“You’re right. Sorry, I-I shouldn’t have come.”
She turns, fumbling with the closed door and I rush to stop her, putting a hand on the door and holding it closed. My chest is right up against her back and I feel her shiver when we touch. Knowing she’s still affected by me has me pressing closer, loving the feel of her against me.
“You absolutely should’ve come. I just don’t want to talk here. Let me take you somewhere.” I feel her stiffen, but after a few seconds, her body relaxes and she sighs, nodding her head just enough for me to see her agreement before she drops her hand from the doorknob so I can pull the door open.
I want to put my hand on her back to lead her to my truck, but I’m afraid that might be pushing my luck too far. It’s not necessary anyway because she heads straight for my truck, stopping at the passenger side and waiting for me to let her in. I could just beep the locks and let her do it herself, but I’m suddenly desperate for any touch of hers I can get so I reach around her to open the door. It doesn’t hurt that it allows me to inhale the scent of her perfume either.
Once we’re in my truck, I freeze, not knowing where to take her, but she saves me with an offer. “We can go to my place if you want.”
“Sure.” She’ll probably feel more comfortable there anyway. “How do I get there?”
Hailey starts giving me directions and I realize the stairs she was going up last night must be to her apartment, not a friend’s. How is it possible we live in the same complex and in all this time I haven’t seen her? I should probably tell her I live there too, but I don’t. Waiting until after we have our talk would probabl
y be better.
The rest of the trip to her apartment is silent, and the closer we get the more she starts to fidget. I want to reassure her, but I don’t know what to say to make her feel better. Thankfully, the trip isn’t long, so the silence doesn’t last too long, but the moment I put the truck in park she’s got the door open and she’s jumping down, leaving me to do the same because I’m afraid she’s going to run from me. Something spooked her in the ride over and I need to find out what it was.
Chapter 12
Hailey
Why did I go to his garage? I feel like an idiot, and the longer I sit here in his truck beside him the worse the feeling becomes. The second he parks, I jerk open the door and jump down, needing to get away from him, from the smell of his cologne that assaulted my senses all the way here. I can’t think straight around him.
What was I thinking offering to let him come here? Now he’ll know where I live and how to find me. What a dumb idea that was.
I’m so far in my head I don’t notice him come over to stand beside me until he takes my hand in his.
“Breathe, Hailey.” His voice is pitched low and soothing and I suck in a large breath. God, why am I acting like this? I need to chill out. “We don’t have to do this if it’s too hard. I can wait.”
His voice is so gentle, but I can hear the underlying sadness. He wants to explain things to me, and after talking to Riley last night I feel like I owe him the chance to do so. Even if all it does is give me closure so I can move on from thoughts of him. It’s been a year since that day in his waiting room, but the pain is just as fresh now as it was then.
I take a moment to gather my courage and straighten my spine. “No, it’s fine. Let’s get this over with.” His flinch is small, but I still see it out of the corner of my eye and instantly want to apologize. I swallow the words. He deserves that and so much more from me.
