Journey to the Unknown

by Jacqueline Francis

  “Her mouth runs on a motor,” Kevin continued, “just on and on and on. I can’t stand her! She’s driving me fucking insane. I’m ready to strangle myself. So she took us on a like…a hundred thousand mile detour and instead of this trip taking a few days, it’s gonna take weeks. Weeks, Max! Fucking weeks alone with this girl, day in and day out. I won’t survive—” He stopped midsentence when the door opened again. “Hang on a second, Max.”

  “Sure.”

  “Jazz, where are you going?”

  “To the store,” she replied.

  Again with this shit, he thought. “You can’t walk alone at night.” And it felt like he was explaining common sense to her for the hundredth time. “I’ll come with you.”

  “Kevin, it’s just across the parking lot,” she said, pointing to the small store about fifty feet away. “You can watch me walk there from here. Besides, black belt in tae-kwon-do, remember? Anyone comes at me and I turn into a swirling storm of death. Kick, quick jab and—”

  “Yeah. Yeah,” Kevin said, brushing her off. “I get it. Go on with your bad self.” He waited until she was out of earshot before resuming the conversation with his brother. “See what I mean, Max? Fucking bat-shit crazy!”

  His brother chuckled. “You’re gonna stand outside until she gets back, aren’t you?”

  “Yep.”

  “For someone who can’t stand her, you sure are protective.”

  “Shut up, Max! She’s not street-smart, all right? Black belt, my ass. Give her waffles and ice cream and even aliens could abduct her without much of a fight.”

  “Whatever you say, Kev. Enjoy the rest of your birthday.”

  Kevin exhaled an exaggerated breath. “Yeah, I’ll try. Thanks again for the call.”

  He hung up, watching Jasmin as she disappeared into the store. He was expecting another call right about now. This time from his sister. Jordan and Max couldn’t handle emotional situations very well. They weren’t the best at offering comfort, though Max was a lot better than Jordan. Today was an emotional day for him. It was his first birthday in fifteen years without Perry. Kevin was glad that he wasn’t at home because today would have been unbearable. He would have sat staring out the window for hours, waiting for his best friend to come by, wondering what sentimental shit he would have done this year.

  His siblings knew how he felt and it was obvious that they were trying to avoid him. But the day was almost over and Max’s call proved that they couldn’t avoid him much longer. They’d probably had a bet as to who would call first, a bet that Max had obviously lost.

  He stared at his phone, waiting. “And three…two…” His phone rang and Jordan’s number flashed on his screen. They were so predictable. He smiled to himself and answered. “Let me guess. You beat Max this time.”

  “What are you talking about?” she replied, feigning shock. “I didn’t even talk to Max.”

  “Very clever wording, Jo, but I see right through you. It’s been my birthday the whole day and you call me at night…directly after Max…so there was at least a text involved. Next time don’t make it so obvious.”

  He heard a slight giggle. “We’ll try harder to keep you in the dark next time. But anyway, happy birthday, Bink.”

  He hated that nickname, but she insisted on using it, always telling him that he was the only one in the family who didn’t have a stupid middle name, so he deserved it. “Thanks.”

  “When mom called me earlier, she said you’re not at home. Everything okay?”

  Kevin sighed. Why was his mother telling everyone in the whole goddamn family? He kept his response short this time, not wanting to rehash it all over again. “I’m driving down to Florida. There’s something I need to do.”

  “You’re going all that way by yourself?”

  “No. I’m…I’m with…someone.” He was scarce on the details with her, because, unlike Max, Jordan would keep questioning until he snapped. It was the reason why she had nineteen nails in her log and Max had none. Max knew when to back off.

  Jasmin was only a few feet away now and he hoped that she would just walk quietly back into the room, because if Jordan heard her, there would be more questions.

  But…it was Jasmin. She didn’t do quiet. “See? I’m back,” she announced like it wasn’t obvious. “That walk across the parking lot was very scary, but I made it back in one piece. And all on my own. Admit it. You’re proud.”

  He rolled his eyes. “You’re a jackass.”

  “What?” Jordan asked, sounding confused.

  “Not you, Jo.”

  “Thanks for waiting outside for me, Kevin.”

  “I wasn’t waiting for you. Now if you don’t mind, I’m on the phone.”

  She walked back inside without another word and closed the door.

  “Fuck, she’s so goddamn annoying!” Kevin said.

  “What’s her name?”

  He tried not to groan at the commencement of her questioning. “Jazz…Jasmin.”

  “That’s a pretty name. Is she pretty?”

  More questions, but he took some time to answer this one, trying to think of the right words. There wasn’t a simple way to describe Jasmin, but simple words were all he had. “She’s beautiful…” he whispered, “…in the most unconventional way…I just wish she’d shut up once in a while.” He opened the door and walked back inside, changing the topic of conversation to put an end to the interrogation. “So I hear you got a boyfriend.”

  “Where’d you hear that?” she asked, a bit surprised. “Mom?”

  “Nope.”

  “Shane?”

  He didn’t want to reveal that Kay was actually his secret source. “Just answer the question, Jo.”

  “Yes. I have a boyfriend and he’s great.” She sounded like a lovesick puppy. Tyler must be really something to get his snarky sister all girly like that. He wasn’t fully convinced, though. Her track record with men hadn’t been the greatest.

  “Well, when you’ve been with the likes of Billy Mason and that douche, anyone else is—” He stopped, stunned into silence by the sight before him.

  “Bink? You there?”

  “Jazz…” Her name caught in his throat. “What are you…uh…Jo-jo, I gotta go.”

  “Wait, Bink. What’s—”

  He hung up and walked across the small room to Jasmin. She was sitting cross-legged on the floor with two small tubs of vanilla ice cream in front of her. However, one of them was topped with five lit candles.

  “What’s this?” he asked, sitting down beside her.

  “It’s your birthday, right?”

  “How do you know it’s my birthday?”

  “Your phone has been ringing off the hook today. I already knew you were a Scorpio, so it was easy to figure out. And I also figured out that you have four siblings. Three brothers and a sister. Shane called in the car, then there was Dom, Max and…Jo-jo?”

  It was pointless trying to keep his personal life a complete secret. “It’s Jordan,” he corrected, “but all of us call her Jo-jo.”

  “It must be nice…having a big family, so many people who care about you.”

  She looked at him with so much longing, he didn’t have the heart to tell her that he took them for granted every day. “It’s great.”

  She accepted his short response and didn’t push for more information. Instead, she slid the ice cream towards him. “Well, make a wish and blow out your candles.”

  He’d never believed in that tradition, and a wish wouldn’t undo the past, so he just blew out the candles. She reached behind her for a bottle of chocolate sauce and somehow seeing it took him back to his birthday three years ago. The contrast was astonishing. His eighteen-year old self was excited about life, about the future. The possibility to do great things was right at his fingertips. He’d never been diligent in high school. His siblings were all nerds and he’d tried his best to rebel against it. However, the family gene finally caught up with him in college and Perry’s little speech had been the
source of more motivation. He’d worked damn hard, not just for the promise of money and success; he genuinely loved what he was studying and he’d pushed himself to do better, be better.

  But now his twenty-one-year old self was a college dropout drowning in guilt, a bum going nowhere. Money, success—it meant nothing to him now. He didn’t even deserve to wear the chain anymore, but he couldn’t bring himself to take it off. Possibility had been replaced with emptiness. Perry had told him to forget about Hope, and in the last three months he’d used that advice in an entirely different context. He knew at that moment that he would never feel whole again.

  “Are you okay?” she asked.

  He slowly shook his head. Filled with so much disappointment, he couldn’t even find the will to lie. “No.”

  “Did I do something wrong?”

  “No,” he whispered. “This is…Thank you, Jazz.”

  A wide smile lit up her face and she handed him the chocolate sauce. “You’re welcome.”

  It took less than a minute before she reached over and dipped her spoon into his tub. “Really?” he asked. “We’re eating the same thing.”

  “Yours has more chocolate sauce. Also, it felt like I was in a parallel universe. I thought you were being…nice and my brain couldn’t comprehend that, so I decided to bug you to restore some sense of normality.”

  He laughed and it was something he didn’t think would happen today. This girl. This crazy, thoughtful, annoying girl. She took the little she knew about him and turned it into a gift. He was trying to push her back, keep her at a distance, but she wouldn’t take a hint. He could feel it; slow and stealthy, she was getting under his skin. They fought all the time, but every now and then they had a moment like this, a moment where he completely forgot about the pain of the past and just submersed himself in the present. These moments were rare and fleeting, like a shooting star. And just like a shooting star, it showed him the wonderment of possibility again.

  November, 11

  Las Vegas, Nevada

  “VEGAAAAAAAAAAAS!” Jasmin screamed, pumping her fists in the air like she was Rocky at the top of the stairs. She was at top of the stairs, but there were only five and it was in front of a hotel. “Woohoo! We’re in Vegas, Kevin! Vegas!”

  Her excitement was gushing over. She rushed down the stairs, ran a few steps to the right, then turned back and ran in the other direction. She didn’t even know where to start. Everything was just so big and bright and beautiful.

  “I feel like I need to do something crazy, Kevin. I feel like the Vegas bug has bit me.”

  “We’ve been here all of three seconds.”

  “It’s a fast-acting bug.”

  He was still at the bottom of the stairs in front of the hotel and she walked back to him.

  “I feel like taking off all my clothes and running through that fountain over there.” She pointed to the massive fountain outside the Bellagio hotel. “I mean, there’s a reason why they call it the Strip.”

  “That’s…not the reason. And I’m not sure about the laws here, but I think public nudity is still a crime.”

  They slowly walked down the sidewalk lined with palm trees and neatly trimmed hedges, taking in all the fabulousness around them. It was ten in the morning and there was still a buzz. It could just be her, but there was definitely something electric in the air. Each building was more beautiful and extravagant than the last. It was like nothing she had ever seen before. Not a normal city, but a paradise. Each hotel had its own theme, which made her feel like she was in a hundred different places at once. New York. Egypt. France. Italy.

  “I want to see everything!” she shouted. “Like in Debbie does Dallas, but this will be Jasmintha does Vegas.”

  He stopped walking. “Jazz, have you…have you ever watched Debbie does Dallas?”

  “No, but I’ve heard the title a lot.”

  A sullen look came over his face. “Um…It’s…it’s not…” His tone was somber, like he was about to deliver the news that she had a life-threatening disease. “She…Debbie…” She didn’t know Debbie, but she felt like she should be worried. He took a deep breath, almost as if the reveal would be heart-wrenching. “Debbie didn’t go sightseeing, Jazz.”

  “Then what was she doing in Dallas?”

  He shook his head sympathetically. “She…she did a lot. She did a lot of things in Dallas, but…sightseeing wasn’t one of them.”

  Slowly, she pieced it together and the illusion that had been built up in her mind for years just crumbled. What a disappointment. Debbie was a dream-wrecker.

  They explored the Strip by foot, bouncing in and out of stores and hotels. It wasn’t just electric, it was magical. Gold plated staircases. Glass elevators. Crystal chandeliers. Colorful lights. Luxurious, extravagant beauty—an overload for her vision, but that Vegas bug had bitten her bad because she couldn’t stop herself. A lot of her visits were short because she was technically underage to go into a casino, but there was so much more to see. She went crazy with photos, taking selfies in front of every landmark and building. Kevin was also taken in by the exuberance, though he showed his excitement in a very low-key way—that being, he didn’t complain or argue.

  They eventually stumbled upon a casino/hotel that promised an amazing view of the Strip. They travelled up to the open rooftop and she was in awe. The cool breeze flitted through her hair. The aerial perspective added an entirely different view of Vegas, the expanse of urban entertainment mixed with dusty desert in the distance. The buildings and streets were pierced with streams of blue from hotel pools and fountains. It was gorgeous and only added to the anxious buzz zipping through her. She walked to the railing, leaning slightly over the edge to allow the wind to swirl around her. It was a breath of freedom.

  “I’m on top of the world!” she screamed, quite unexpectedly.

  A few people turned to look at them, but Kevin didn’t seem embarrassed by the attention. He was definitely adjusting to the shameful discomfort that came along with her.

  “I’m gonna do something crazy,” she said, turning to him.

  “Please don’t jump off.”

  “I’m gonna do it.”

  He looked a little worried. “Do what?”

  She practiced it in her head a few times before she actually said it. “Fuck!” That was surprisingly liberating. “Fuck! There. I said it. Not so bad. Fuck!”

  “Something is not right with you.”

  “I can’t believe I said it. But I’m in Vegas! Fuck! Fuck it. What a cool word. I see why you like it so much. I think I’m gonna play around with it a bit…like…like all Mafia. What the fuck, Luigi?”

  He shook his head. “You’re disturbed.”

  “And like a stoner. Fuuuuck, dude. Old English. Well, Basil, I believe this tea is fucking shite. Or…” Her eyes widened when the idea struck her. “Or like Snoop Dogg. Foshizzle mynizzle, motherfucker. I think cursing suits me, Kevin. It goes very nicely with my rapper shlong.”

  “Rappers would never use the word shlong.”

  She ignored that statement. What did he know about rappers? “Okay, give me something. I can do it. Throw any cuss word at me.”

  He was fairly amused. “Shit.”

  “Pffft! That’s not even a challenge. Shit. Fuck that shit. Did you see what I did there? Combo cuss. You can’t touch this.”

  “All right. Bitch.”

  “Bitch, please. I am on a roll today.”

  A small smile flickered on his face, but didn’t quite materialize. “Cock.”

  “I can…” She gave an exaggerated snort. “I can say that. Of course I can…say…that. C—” She cleared her throat. “C…co…I mean, it’s so easy. Co…cock.” Her face scrunched, because the word actually tasted bitter. “See? C-cock.” She smiled at him then. “Cock. There you go. Now you do something crazy.”

  “You’re crazy enough for the both of us.”

  “Aw, c’mon. Lighten up! We’re in Vegas.”

  “I know, Jazz. I c
ouldn’t possibly forget. You remind me every five seconds.”

  She reached into her knapsack, took out her cellphone and tapped the icon for the camera. “For real. Just do something out of your comfort zone.”

  His shoulders slumped. “Like what?”

  “I don’t know. Something crazy. Something you wouldn’t ordinarily do. Oh! I know. You could smile. Huh? Wouldn’t that just be insane? Show off your cute little dimples. Or…better yet, you can pretend that you’re actually having a good time. What a stretch of the imagination, Kevin.”

  Despite the fact that his face had hardened with irritability, he rose to the challenge. “Okay. Something crazy?”

  “Yeah.”

  “You want some jazz hands and shit?”

  “Would you do that? That would be amazing.” She moved to stand next to him, lifting her phone to take a picture of the two of them. She wanted proof of this. “Go all out.”

  She couldn’t take the picture just yet, because he was busy prepping himself for it.

  “I’m gonna do it,” he said, bouncing on his toes like a boxer before a match. He even snapped his neck from left to right, loosening himself up for this moment.

  He had a playful side and she kinda liked it. She was glad she’d decided to do this. He was cute when he let his guard down a bit.

  He smiled, flashing those dimples and her anticipation built. “Okay,” he said. “I’m ready. Are you ready?”

  “I’m so ready!”

  “Good.” His smile disappeared. “Take the picture.” He cupped her face with both hands and before she even had a chance to think, his lips were on hers.

  Her eyes widened, then fluttered closed. The hand holding her phone fell to her side as she soaked it all in. It wasn’t brief. He stayed there with his mouth pressed to hers for what felt like forever. He pulled away slightly, his breaths coming out in short, soft pants on her lips. She remained frozen, staring at him, too lost in the what-the-fuckness of it all to do anything more.