Az

by A A Bavar

  “My Lord, if I have found favor in your sight, pass not by without rest and food, I pray you,” he said.

  I glanced at Gabriel – who was the one most likely to accept the offer, and shook my head, then turned my attention back to Abraham who was still on his knees and looking at the ground. Father had once again burdened me with the task of punishing humanity, and I felt harried and distraught. Actually, I was pissed and didn’t understand why we had to visit Abraham at all, let alone waste time with pleasantries. I knew what was coming. I would destroy the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah and then face Lucifer and listen to him gloat about being right; there was no way out, humanity had screwed me again. I opened my mouth to answer, but before I could say anything, Gabriel responded.

  “My brother, Abraham, cease your obeisance. We shall do as you please,” said Gabriel, touching Abraham’s shoulder.

  I took a deep breath and turned to Gabriel. There were no need for words, for my despondent stare said it all. Abraham stood and looked at us one by one, stopping on me. All in black, scythe in hand, long hair, stubble and a bad temper; I was indeed a frightful sight befitting the incongruent image that people had created of me. His eyes were kind but sharp, and I felt them searching mine for hints as to the tenor of our visit. It was obvious that we were there to talk to him, but about what he could not start to imagine. I wonder if he would have been as patient if he knew I had come to destroy his people. Or maybe he knew, because I could see the sadness in his smile.

  “Let a little water be fetched to wash the dust from your feet and hands, and rest yourselves under the shade of the oak,” he said as he motioned towards the trees by the stream. “And I will fetch a morsel of food to comfort your hearts before you tell me what it is that you seek.” With this, he turned and headed for the tent.

  Almost immediately, Hagar, a young Egyptian maiden wearing a white gown with red details on the waist and shoulders and carrying a large bundle of cloth under her arm, came from the tent and walked past us to a shaded spot by the stream. Her skin was fair and her hair, black as the night, fell loosely over her shoulders. She did not look at us even once, but immediately put the bundle on the ground and quickly cleared the stones and fallen branches from the area under the oak. She then unfolded the bundle and spread a flowery cloth on the ground. On it, she placed beautifully woven pillows and several ornate bowls with nuts and dried fruit before returning to the tent.

  Our meal wasn’t a king’s feast, but I have to admit that it was delicious and helped calm me down and slightly dampen my feelings of anger and frustration. Sarah, Abraham’s wife, prepared fresh bread on the hearth – which we ate with cheese, herbs and milk, while Abraham had one of the servants prepare a young calf over the fire. I ate quietly and kept to myself, hoping to find an opportune moment to tell Abraham why we were there. Sarah’s presence, however, made that impossible. Michael, as usual, more interested in food and not much of a talker, ate like there was no tomorrow. So, Gabriel – with his well-mannered ways, was left with the task of engaging in cordial conversation. The small talk went on for over an hour when, finally, with the sky glowing red and the sun beginning to set behind the hills, we were ready to address the true purpose of our visit. We got up and started to walk at a leisurely pace toward the hill opposite from where we had come. I still wasn’t listening and was lost in my own thoughts about the inevitable encounter with Lucifer when Gabriel stopped walking and turned back to face Sarah and Hagar. They were busy clearing the dishes and what was left of the food, but stopped when they noticed Gabriel looking at them.

  Addressing Sarah in a low and reflective tone, Gabriel said, “My dear woman, I will return to these lands in the future and see you with son.”

  I was surprised by Gabriel’s comment, but it was obvious that Sarah was even more so. She stood there momentarily transfixed with wide, open eyes and then, regaining herself, giggled with amusement and responded, “Surely not, my Lord. I am aged and had not the pleasure even in youth. How can it be now, with my lord being old also?”

  “Why do you laugh? Do you doubt your Lord?” asked Gabriel. “Is anything too hard for the Lord?” he affirmed, and as he turned to leave, continued, “I will return to these lands and surely see you with son.”

  Abraham hesitantly, apprehensively looked at Gabriel. I could tell that he was worried that Gabriel might be offended by Sarah’s remark, but he didn’t know Gabriel. Gabriel’s calm and unperturbed manner, however, made him relax and once again we resumed our walk up the path to the hill that led to the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah. It was an easy and pleasurable walk, but I had already lost my somewhat relaxed after-dinner state and felt anxious to get things going. I wanted to dive headfirst into the storm and didn’t care much about the consequences, so I hastened my pace and forced everyone to keep up with me. I only stopped when we reached the top of the hill and turned to find only Abraham and Gabriel close behind me. Michael, being Michael, had slowed his pace and stayed behind, not wanting to get involved. He was content with his role as warrior guardian, and this meeting was more about diplomacy. I was the executioner who had his orders and had to get things done, while Gabriel was there for damage control and to negotiate the terms of the contract before the inevitable slap. But you see, there was no negotiation this time, just the courtesy of information and the slap would be more like a kick in the crotch. I nodded for Gabriel to start.

  Gabriel looked at Abraham, smiled and said in a caring tone, “Great prophet Abraham, commander and shepherd of your people, Father has sent us forth to investigate the cry of grievous sin that reaches the heavens from the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah, and it wouldn’t be proper to hide from you that which must be done.”

  Abraham didn’t respond immediately or show any signs of surprise, instead he stroked his beard in thought. I could tell that he knew what we were there for, after all, it wasn’t the first time that Man had to be punished. What worried him was not the result of the investigation, but rather the actions that would be taken as rectification. “And if it is true? And if Sodom and Gomorrah are truly cities of sin, what will my Lord do?”

  Gabriel put his hand on Abraham’s shoulder and smiled, his eyes betraying the sorrow that he felt in his heart, and replied, “Dear Abraham, Father would never do anything that He would deem as unjust. Everything that He does is for the good of Man.”

  Abraham bowed in acknowledgment, but his concern and love for his people did not allow him to concede just yet. “Yes, of course. But my Lord, I must know what you will do? Surely, not another flood?”

  Gabriel sighed. “No, not a flood. But for Father to create, he must first destroy.”

  “But how? I do not understand.”

  It was one thing to be courteous, or as Gabriel put it, diplomatic, and inform the prophet of our mission, but this was getting us nowhere so I stepped forward with a loud, “Stop!” Both men turned to me simultaneously as I continued, “We’re going to invite everyone and have a barbeque, of course. And, oh yes, I almost forgot; we’re also going to burn the cities to the ground and end the Godlessness and promiscuity.” Then, in a more serious tone, “Father wants you to come with us and witness His wrath so that you can recount it for generations to come, and let Man know what happens when he disobeys God’s will. Fear always supersedes love when obedience is concerned.”

  Abraham looked baffled, and for the first time I realized that maybe he was not quite onboard with us. I guess too much diplomacy and useless repartee had clouded the message, but isn’t that the rule of politics; eat, mingle, talk and screw around but never say anything concrete? I smirked. Abraham, still unsure of what I meant, turned from me to Gabriel and said, “Forgive me, my Lord, but how will burning the cities to the ground end Godlessness and sin? It does not make sense. Wickedness and promiscuity have infested Man and must be purged from the soul. The people of these towns need to be cleansed of their sins, not turned into homeless beggars.”

  Gabriel exhaled and lowered his gaze.
It’s never easy to look someone in the eye and tell them a truth that you know will hurt them. “I’m afraid you didn’t understand, Abraham. The people will burn with the cities.”

  Abraham stumbled backward and would have fallen if I hadn’t grabbed him by the arm. It was clear that although he expected some kind of punishment, this was far more drastic than what he had imagined. “Our Father in heaven, this cannot be. What about the faithful? Will you also destroy the righteous with the wicked?” Abraham paused and stared at Gabriel, not daring to blink.

  Gabriel knew the truth, we all did, so the response wasn’t difficult or compromising, “If there are righteous people in the city, then we will spare them and the cities.”

  I thought the answer was quite clear; righteous people… spared city! But Abraham wasn’t convinced, or wasn’t willing to accept the fact that there was no hope. “What if there are only fifty?” he asked.

  “The cities shall be spared.”

  “And twenty?” continued Abraham.

  “Assuredly, Father will spare the cities,” responded Gabriel, patiently.

  I moved a couple of steps away from them and glanced at Michael. Michael looked at me and shrugged; this was Gabriel’s territory. But I wasn’t quite sure that Gabriel had it in him to deliver the final blow. He was stalling, going along with this pointless banter knowing well that I had been against it the whole time. The delay was making me impatient, and nothing good ever came from me losing my patience. I ran my fingers through my hair and glanced at Abraham.

  “And ten?”

  Goddamn it – exactly what we were there for, the damning of souls – was he going to countdown one by one to zero? “Enough!” I cut in, “If you really have to know, I will burn everything and everyone. If Father ordained it, then there are no righteous men, not even one.” I caught Gabriel’s alarmed look, but was past the point to care. “But tell you what, if there happen to be a few deserving wretches among these infidels, I will expel them so they can die in the desert heat. Satisfied?”

  Even Michael was stunned by my outburst and quickly walked up to my side. He gently but firmly put his hand on my shoulder.

  “Azrail, have you lost your mind? This is Abraham that you’re talking to.” Gabriel’s admonition was calm but strict.

  I placed my thumb and forefinger over my eyes and slowly pinched the bridge of my nose. As my hand moved down my face I felt the week-old stubble on my cheeks and neck; what the hell was I doing? I think I was the first bipolar angel. “I beg your forgiveness, Abraham, but my responsibilities towards humanity have caused me great sorrow and distress. I don’t understand how Man can so readily forget his bounty and break the laws that even animals don’t dare break.” I paused, but not because I expected an answer. There was no answer to be given. Tempt man long enough and he will sin; Lucifer’s motto – but he did much more than come up with a catchy slogan, he was there, always there, and ready at every turn to make sure it would happen. I felt a new wave of revolt and quiet frustration engulf me. “And yet, here I am once again about to make an example of Man for misguided and uncontrolled use of free will – carrying the burden of these condemned souls while Lucifer, my dear brother Lucifer, sits back and receives the spoils.” I stopped and stared at the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah glowing in the night horizon and shouted, “Thousands handed to him on a silver platter by me!”

  Abraham was not shocked or upset by my outburst. To the contrary, he simply looked at me and I could see the kindness in his eyes. “Then, I will accompany you and aid you with this unbearable task.”

  I didn’t know how to react to that kindness. Empathy and altruism had been shoved deep into the recesses of my being while I was completely consumed in a battle between myself and Lucifer; but ever so more with myself. “Oh, but you misunderstand. I feel no remorse in taking the lives of the wretched. It’s Lucifer receiving their souls that revolts me.”

  Abraham lowered his gaze and turned away. He stood humbly with his hands folded in front of him lost in his own thoughts. To my eyes, he suddenly looked much older, much more feeble. Gabriel hesitated, but then took a few steps in his direction, stopping just short of his back. In a quiet voice, almost as if he didn’t want to be heard at all, he said, “Sorry, Abraham, but it may be best that you not accompany us. But, rest assured that we will take care of your nephew, Lot, and his family.”

  I looked at Gabriel in disgust and rolled my eyes. Damn, why did Gabriel always have to complicate things? Abraham didn’t ask for anything! All we – actually I, had to do was destroy the cities and get out. But no, that wasn’t enough. Because now, I also had to offer my babysitting services to Lot and his family. As I was about to object, it hit me. This was a good thing.

  ELEVEN

  The sun had gone down and the sky was a deep blue with hundreds of brilliant stars swimming in its vastness. It was almost a heavenly sight, if not for one particularly bright, red star singled out like a hermit above the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah. Gabriel and I were standing in front of the main gate, staring at the stone walls that loomed high above us. I remember thinking, although quite a barrier for men, how idiotic they were for us. The gate was massive, made of solid oak and bolted with iron. Above it, positioned in the center of the supporting arc and protruding outward, was a large stone, phallic sculpture. Below it was written: Here Lives Happiness. I noticed that Gabriel looked away embarrassed, but his unamused look told me that if there was any doubt in his mind before, there was none now. I looked up at the lonely star and wondered how long after giving the signal Michael would start the assault, and how long before it was all over.

  We walked through the gate without a word and proceeded down a well-lit street that almost immediately opened into a wide, mostly empty, inner court. Houses, shops and small buildings surrounded it, their continuity only broken by a few narrow streets that led away to the inner city and the dwellings beyond. I was quite surprised at the cleanliness and charm of the whole place and for an instant wanted to believe that we were mistaken; that’s when I saw it. Smack in the middle of the courtyard, a lavishly promiscuous fountain was making an unmistakable statement. The outside wall of the pool was covered with colorful square tiles, individually hand painted and portraying a myriad of sexual acts, while the main sculpture, made of marble, characterized a Herculean figure with a disproportionately large and erect organ shooting water into the pool below. I quickly glanced at Gabriel, but he had turned his back to the fountain and was looking around in disbelief. I followed his gaze and realized what we had walked into – the red lights were on and Roxanne was hard at work. There were men wearing nothing but loincloths and women in loose, flowing and semi-transparent gowns with nothing underneath standing in the shadows and doorways, who when approached by others – men, women or both – disappeared into the buildings behind them.

  In the past, I had chastised Man for all sorts of transgressions. In the beginning it had been difficult witnessing the depths of darkness to which humanity could plummet, but as it is with everything, past scars worked like a shield and made me more and more callous; just like a child who becomes insensitive to punishment, I had become indifferent to the immoralities of humanity. But this time it was different. I felt embarrassed that Gabriel was there; and protective. I was used to it, but seeing the shock and aversion on Gabriel’s face made me want to lash out and destroy indiscriminately; I had to prevent the scarring, I would not allow him to go down the same path as I. If I had to punish Man while protecting it from Lucifer, then so be it, but Gabriel had to stand beside Man and protect him from himself. Without thought about the promise we had made to Abraham, I looked up and was about to give the signal when, suddenly, a man hastily entered the court from the street closest to us. I stopped to look at him as he stood there gasping for air. He was obviously a wealthy man, wearing a purple undergarment of fine linen bound by a girdle, a colorful vesture, a head cloth, and leather sandals. He quickly glanced around the yard and, although quite out of br
eath, promptly headed toward us. As he reached Gabriel, who was a foot or two ahead of me, he bowed low and said, “My Lord, uncle sent word that you would be arriving tonight. Your presence here is an honor and a privilege.” The man stopped, took a breath and then continued, “Please allow me to offer you a place to eat and rest before you continue on your journey.” He paused, and although he was bent with his eyes cast downward, I could see him furtively look from door to door and absorb everything that he already knew was taking place in every dark corner. In an embarrassed but urgent tone, he said, “We should leave, my Lord. It’s not appropriate to be outside after dark. People may misunderstand.”

  I didn’t worry about Gabriel’s answer, his look of discomfort said it all, but I did wonder about Abraham’s sincerity since it was obvious that he had warned Lot even before our visit to him. I shrugged it off and turned to face the colossal limb that so defined that Trojan monument. To my surprise, and I’m not sure why it surprised me anymore, my calling card was already there impatiently hopping from side to side on the offensive structure. It was a confirmation. I had an important – and I’m not embarrassed to say – somewhat enjoyable task at hand. I winked at Bran, and it cawed and jumped up to watch from the statue’s head.

  Gabriel looked down at the man and said, “You must be Lot, Abraham’s nephew. We weren’t expecting to see you so soon.” He motioned for Lot to stand. “We thank you for your generosity, but I think that we will spend the night in town and get to know the people and their ways. From what I see, it’s quite evident that we will have business to tend to for Father before the night is done; and not a pleasant affair at that.”