She looked up into his blue eyes. She would always love him, but lately, if she was honest with herself, she’d felt the shift from being in love with him to simply loving him. Especially when, every day, she could see the difference between him and Jesse from what she’d had with Leo.
Leo had given up so much to stay with her. He tried so hard. Even though she sometimes still struggled with anger over the whole thing, it was gradually getting easier to admit Leo was right to leave. She couldn’t expect him to live his life trying to fix her when only she could do that.
And as long as Leo had been there, carrying the weight of not only their relationship, but trying to buffer her from the world, she’d had no reason to change or chip away at the concrete cocoon she’d attempted to encase her painful past in.
“What if he thinks I’m batcrap crazy and decides he doesn’t want anything to do with me and it messes up you seeing him for treatments?”
“Whoa.” He stepped back and caught her hands and held them against his chest. “Stop. Do not let your thoughts go there, for starters. Don’t set yourself up to fail just because you expect you will. Secondly, you let me deal with my relationship with him. If on the off chance he decides that, well, there are other people out there who practice acupuncture. I honestly don’t think he’s like that. It would shock me greatly if he let a personal relationship get in the way of a professional relationship. Not after everything I’ve heard about him.”
She finally nodded.
He kissed her forehead. “Get going, sweetheart. You’ll be late.”
Jesse sat at the dining room table with Laurel. He was helping her with her math homework.
“You look pretty, Mommy,” she said.
“Thank you.”
“You going out on a date?”
Eva felt her face heat even as the two men shared a knowing smile. “I’m having dinner with some friends,” she said, leaning in to hug Laurel. It wasn’t a lie, it just wasn’t the full truth.
“Okay. Have fun.”
“I might not be back before you go to bed, so good-night. Love you.”
“Love you, too. Good-night.”
Leo walked her out to her car and gave her a final hug. “You’ve got this. It’s a baby step. No expectations, remember? Good or bad. Just go have dinner with friends.”
“Yeah. Dinner with friends.”
As she approached the restaurant fifteen minutes later, she kept repeating that mantra.
Dinner with friends…dinner with friends…
Yes, she’d gone out a couple of times with guys after Leo left her. The truth was, she’d never slept with any of them and never had any intention of doing so. They were more experiments than anything, for her to see if she was so horrible that no man wanted her.
Then Leo’s accident happened, and Jesse had forced her to take a cold, hard look at herself in a way she never had before.
She hadn’t liked what she saw there. Because she realized that she couldn’t hold on to righteous indignation and keep a moral high ground when she’d spent over twelve years using Leo as her emotional life preserver.
Literally.
June, Scrye, and Nate were standing outside the restaurant when she arrived. Scrye held one of those beepers they handed out to let people know their table was ready.
“Hey,” June said, offering her a big smile and a strong hug. “You’re right on time.”
“Good to see you again,” Scrye said, engulfing her in his embrace. Probably the only man she’d ever hugged who could make Leo’s hugs feel tiny by comparison.
“Thanks for coming to dinner with us.” Nate offered her a warm smile and she initiated the hug instead of making him try to figure it out.
It felt good hugging him. “Thanks for putting up with Tilly’s interference,” she said.
He laughed. “If I didn’t know her—and Eliza and June and Marcia—it might have been awkward. I sort of feel honored to know I’ve passed their muster. Like I’ve been admitted to Hogwarts or something.”
The beeper in Scrye’s hand started blinking. “Oh, we’re up. Excellent.”
They ended up in a large booth. Eva opted to slide inside first and fought the urge to snuggle against Nate.
Now with him, his calm, soothing nature drew her in. As she studied the menu, she had to fight to keep her focus on that and not on him sitting right next to her.
When the waitress came to take their drink orders, Nate automatically told her that Eva was on his check.
It was a stupid little detail but it still sent a warm shiver through her. “Thank you,” she said when the waitress left. “You didn’t have to do that, but I appreciate it.”
“Hey, my treat. I’m glad I could have dinner with you.”
“I feel like I should be buying you dinner because you had to run the gauntlet.”
“It’s all right. Besides, it allowed me to get one over on my little sister for a change.”
“Cherise?”
“Yeah.”
“Still, I’ll buy the next one.”
“Maybe another time. It’s okay. I prefer to buy the first dinner, anyway.”
“Why?”
He smiled. “Because that way, if I make a total ass out of myself and you hate me, at least I can feel better that I paid for dinner.”
Scrye laughed. “You are a wise man.”
“Hey, I raised a little sister. I’m no idiot.”
* * * *
Yes, Nate could tell Eva felt far more nervous about tonight than he did. Did he hope it went well? Of course. He got the impression, however, that this date was a personal test of sorts for her. Maybe even in a way Tilly and the others didn’t know.
In fact, if he were a betting man, he would wager good money on Eva having a whopper of a secret vault inside her, holding something really bad that few people even saw.
Jesse and Leo knew it, most likely. It wasn’t just parental responsibilities and an unfortunate accident that kept the two men living with Eva. There was more there, far more. A deep, protective energy the men had for her. He could feel it when around all three of them at the club.
And it had to be a huge, dark emotional matter for Jesse, the new one in the dynamic, to feel as strongly about protecting her as Leo did.
Nate also knew Tilly was good about doing her research. She wouldn’t have fixed him up with a total train wreck. There might be things Tilly didn’t know about Eva, but unless Tilly thought the overall odds were heavily in favor of success, she wouldn’t stick her neck on the line and risk friendships pairing people up she thought would implode.
Everyone had their quirks and issues and emotional baggage. Some more than others, but it didn’t usually keep them from being a functional human being.
Whether or not the baggage Eva lugged around with her would be too much for Nate to deal with remained to be seen. The only expectation he had for tonight was a pleasant dinner and conversation with friends.
Nothing else.
Was he attracted to Eva? Yes. Physically and mentally.
Whether he’d allow that to develop into more…
He wouldn’t venture to guess.
He felt Eva relax as the evening went on. She had what she labeled a terminally dull job as a claims rep at a call center for an insurance company, but she seemed satisfied enough with it.
Her daughter, however, was another topic entirely.
She could talk forever about Laurel. With June and Scrye also swapping parental stories, at least in this way he didn’t feel left out. He’d shifted roles from being Cherise’s big brother to being her dad in an instant.
To this day, he felt grateful he’d been there with her at the air show, and shuddered to think what might have happened if he hadn’t.
How the outcome could have been far more tragic—and perhaps his life could have taken a completely different and infinitely worse course—had he stayed home that day instead of dragging himself out of bed to go with them at Cherise’s request.
“I bet you see an interesting cross-section of clientele,” June said to him.
“I do. It’s never boring. Even if I have a string of appointments of clients all coming in for the same issue, they’re all different. Different causes. Different treatment modes. I have to custom tailor what I do.”
“How did you get into that, anyway?” Scrye asked.
“My step-dad had back pain,” Nate explained. “One of my mom’s friends, her husband was a DO and doctor of Chinese medicine and offered to do acupuncture on him. He only went through with it to humor my mom. It actually helped him, where the base doctors just wanted to prescribe him meds and told him to lose weight, which he really didn’t need to do. When I saw that, how it really helped him when he was a skeptic, I realized it was something I wanted to be able to do. Fortunately, it was an easier course of studies than full-on medical school would have been once I had custody of Cherise. I would have had to drop out of school if I was a med student.”
“You and your sister seem very close,” June said.
“We are. I know this might sound weird, but I think of her more as my daughter than my sister in some ways.”
“No, it makes perfect sense,” Scrye said. “You didn’t have any other family who could take her?”
“Not close family. No one she would have known. I couldn’t have done that to her anyway. I helped raise her. Mom and Ken were still active duty when she was born. Well, Ken was. Mom went back after maternity leave and I did a lot of babysitting, changed a lot of diapers.”
“That must have been difficult for you as a kid,” Eva said.
He smiled. “No, because we were stationed in England then. Actually, because I was an American, and ‘different,’ there were a few girls who were attracted to me because they automatically thought I was a bad boy. Their parents loved that I was a doting big brother and brought Cherise everywhere with me when she was a kid. Once they realized she was my sister and not my daughter.”
“Sort of like the American girls loving your British accent?” Eva teased.
“Guilty. Hey, I was a teenage boy but I wasn’t the garden-variety stupid.”
* * * *
The more Eva talked with Nate, the more relaxed she felt. Yes, he understood parental responsibilities, one of Eva’s sticking points about any potential relationship.
She respected him even more for that.
There would be no problems with him understanding that family—especially Laurel—would always come first.
By the time the evening ended it was after ten o’clock and the restaurant was nearly empty.
With cell numbers exchanged and the checks paid, June and Scrye bid them good-night and left while Nate walked her to her car.
She wondered if he’d ask her to follow him home, or suggest going home with her, but he pleasantly surprised her.
Although, she knew it shouldn’t have been a surprise.
“Thank you for tonight,” he said, kissing her hand. “This was really nice. I had fun.”
“Me, too. Thank you again for buying me dinner. I wasn’t expecting that.”
The smile he gave her as she looked up into his eyes started something simmering deep inside her. Not even sexually. Just…different.
Alive.
Like he could see inside her in ways the average person couldn’t, and she felt safe letting him in.
“Well, I named the restaurant,” he said. “And I can afford it. Not that I’m trying to flaunt anything…Jesus, sorry. I did so well through dinner, and now I’m a bloody idiot.”
She smiled. “You’re not an idiot. I get what you meant.”
“Good, because Cherise says sometimes I swallow my foot all the way to my bollocks.”
“That’s quite a feat.”
“Yeah, nothing like a little sister to point out every flaw.” But his tone was filled with love as he said it.
“Kids are good about doing that. They can bring out the best and worst in us sometimes.”
“That they can.”
They stood there for another moment. She didn’t want to pull her hand from his, and he was making no move to release it.
She took a chance. “Would you mind another hug?”
“Not at all.”
As his arms encircled her, she closed her eyes and rested her head against his chest. He was a couple of inches taller than Leo, and built different, slimmer, but still feeling sturdy to her. Leo was solid, like a lion. Nate was liquid power, like a cheetah.
It didn’t feel uncomfortable in the least. In fact, it felt a little too comfortable, like she could easily slip into a routine with him without thinking about it too hard.
That wasn’t something she could let herself do. She needed to be mindful of herself and the limitations of other people and not just fall into his arms and let him carry her the way she had done to Leo.
Finally, she let go of him and he immediately released her, as if he’d been waiting for the cue from her on when to end their hug. Looking up into his eyes was a different experience. She’d spent so long with Leo’s blue gaze the center of her world, and now Jesse was part of her life.
Nate’s brown eyes looked even darker in the shadows, but still thoughtful, as if processing everything.
“Can we do this again soon?” she asked.
“Absolutely. You let me know when. Feel free to text me anytime. If I’m with a client, I can’t respond right away, so don’t think I’m snubbing you.”
“Ditto. I can’t always respond when I’m at work.”
They stared at each other for a moment.
“Will you be at the club this Friday?” she asked.
“I can be.”
“Can we meet there and just…talk?”
“Sure. It doesn’t even have to be there. We can go to a restaurant or something, if you’d prefer.”
“I’d like to meet there, I think. Then we can talk without worrying about what people hear.”
“Ah. Now I’m tracking.” He opened her car door for her. “Then what time would you like to meet?”
“Eight. If that’s okay?”
“Eight’s fine. Would you like me to bring my kit and give you a treatment?”
“I wasn’t trying to get a freebie.”
“I know. But if it helps you, I’m happy to do it.”
“Okay. Thank you, yes.”
He waited to walk away until she had her seat belt fastened and got her car started. As she drove away, she glanced in the rearview mirror and spotted his tall form heading for his car.
I wish this night didn’t have to end.
Her phone beeped at her with an incoming text. At the next light, she looked and found a text from Tilly.
WELL???
June must have texted or called her.
In car. Will text when I get home. Went well.
Tilly texted her back almost immediately, and she waited for the next stoplight to look.
:)
Leo and Jesse were watching TV in the living room when she walked in. They could have just as easily been watching TV in bed.
They both looked at her, eyebrows arched.
She walked over and they parted so she could sit between them. “Well?” Leo asked.
“It went well. At least, I think it did.” She recapped the evening.
“Do you like him?” Jesse asked.
“I’d like to see him again,” she said. “And we’re going to meet at the club on Friday and talk. Maybe get a treatment.”
“We weren’t going to go on Friday,” Leo said. “Date night with Laurel.”
“I know,” she said. “That’s why I asked if he’d meet me there.”
“Ahh,” both men said.
“I figured it’d be easier that way,” she said. “And you know you’re going to go do sushi anyway, so I won’t have to lie and say I don’t feel like going out with you guys. I don’t see how you can eat the damn stuff. It’s bait.”
“Not when it’s on a be
d of rice and drenched in wasabi-infused soy sauce, it’s not,” Jesse said with a grin. “Then it’s fine dining.”
“Blech.”
“I’m glad you had fun, sweetheart,” Leo said. He kissed the top of her head before standing. “Now we can head to bed.”
“Ha. I knew it. You were waiting up for me.”
Instead of the playful smile she expected, he scowled as he turned back to her. “Of course we were. Had my phone ready, too. You don’t think I would have gone to bed until I knew you were home safe, do you?”
And here she’d assumed he just wanted to hear how it went. “Thank you,” she quietly said.
Jesse, who hadn’t stood yet, touched her shoulder to make her look at him. “What part of ‘under protection’ do you not get? If it wasn’t a school night for Laurel, we would have arranged a babysitter and gone out on the double-date with you.”
“You don’t think that would have scared him off?”
“If it had,” Leo said, “then he wouldn’t be good enough for you to start with.”
“You guys don’t need to arrange your lives around my dating schedule.” Not that she technically had a dating schedule.
“Eva, listen to us,” Jesse said. “We’re a pack. Not just a pack, but a package deal. This isn’t lip service to us. This is a serious commitment on our parts. To Laurel and to you. The strength of the pack is our bond with each other. We want you to be happy and safe. And that means this is the kind of stuff you can expect until someone meets or exceeds our standards and we feel we can back off a little.”
Jesse kissed her forehead before standing to join Leo. “The pack always comes first. This isn’t a burden. It’s just what we do, because we know you’d do whatever you had to do for us. You already do, every day, by sharing a home with us. We love you, and that won’t ever change.”
“Thanks.” Her phone buzzed in her hand.
The Strength of the Pack Page 5
