Tilly.
AREN’T YOU HOME YET????????
Leo smiled. “Let me guess, Tilly wants a report.”
“Yeah. I’d better give it to her.”
“Good-night,” Leo said. “See you in the morning.”
When she heard their bedroom door close behind them, she walked out onto the lanai and sat in one of the chairs there and called Tilly.
Her friend answered immediately. “’Bout damn time.”
“Sorry. I was talking to Leo and Jesse.”
“Sooo?”
Eva gave her the quick recap. When she finished, Tilly sounded satisfied. “I won’t be at the club Friday. I’m going to be in LA still. But I’ll call Marcia and—”
“No,” she gently said. “It’s okay. I want to try this one solo.”
Tilly went quiet. “You sure?”
“It’s at the club. I feel safe at the club, and I’ll know enough people there that if I don’t feel safe, I can grab someone. Please, you don’t need to chaperone it. Or arrange for a chaperone.”
Tilly didn’t respond at first. “Any time you want one—ask.”
“I will. I promise. I just had this talk with the guys. Sort of. I won’t jump into something. I’ll take things slow.”
“Okay. Good.”
By the time Eva got off the phone with her it was nearly eleven. As she stood and headed back into the house, she couldn’t help but think about how different—in a good way—hugging Nate had felt.
Chapter Seven
Nate took his run Thursday morning, just before dawn. It was another comfortably cool, albeit muggy morning. A warm patch this time of year, even by Florida winter standards.
Hard to believe it was nearly the end of the first week of December already.
Although every year he said that.
Damn, I feel old.
Last night, he fell asleep thinking about Eva. Not wild sexual fantasies of her, but idle suppositions regarding the depths and contents of her emotional pool. An apparently calm surface, but still waters running deep and all that bullshit.
Or was there a hidden intake pipe somewhere at the bottom of that pool, ready to suck him in and spit him through crushing turbines before dumping him out on the other side of her stalwart emotional dam?
He didn’t know, but the more he thought about it, the more he realized maybe he would be willing to take a chance on her.
Not something he thought he’d be saying anytime soon.
Maybe it’s the time of year making me feel melancholy.
Growing up, Christmas in their home had always been filled with cheer, friends, the smell of their mom baking, the tree decorated to the ceiling, and love.
Lots of love.
He’d done his best when Cherise was younger to keep that spirit alive as much as possible, including cooking holiday dinners and inviting as many friends over as he could to fill the seats with bodies and the house with noise.
But they were always alone at the end of the evening. Just the two of them.
When she was eighteen, she finally sat Nate down and explained the facts of life to him. That she appreciated him doing it, but he didn’t have to do it for her.
They still decorated the tree—they had last year, even though she’d moved out—but their holiday dinners were now quiet affairs, always the two of them and whoever either of them might be dating, and sometimes a stray friend or two who didn’t have anyone to spend the day with.
Nate had always tried to hold to the philosophy that what he needed would enter his life at the right time. Maybe that was why Eva had entered his life now. Or perhaps the converse was true—that he was entering her life at the right time. Mutual rightness.
He couldn’t focus on anything but her this morning, it seemed. Yes, he found himself physically attracted to Eva, but that was low on his list. Her personality, her intellect, her energy were what really drew him.
The obvious love she had for her daughter, her family.
That all those traits were contained within a beautiful wrapper only made it that much sweeter.
From what Nate could tell, Eva wasn’t looking for any of the three big red flags that always put him off—a sugar daddy, a quick fuck, or a Dominant/Master.
If anything, it seemed he’d finally met someone nearly as cautious as he was in terms of getting involved.
That was a refreshing change.
Maybe he was strange, but the few times he’d had a woman throw herself at him at the club after working with her one time, that was a turn-off, not a turn-on. How could she even know she’d like to have a conversation with him when she’d barely talked to him? How could less than an hour of mostly one-sided communication specifically relating to what they were doing lead someone to want to jump into bed?
Of course he believed in strong, instant attraction. He was cautious, not stupid. Maybe he was the oddball exception. Cherise had joked about it enough.
In that way, he envied his sister. She could meet someone, talk with them, and start playing with them that very same night. As a Top, not as a bottom, but she was freer in that way.
Just like he sometimes envied the men who could be service Tops and pick up play partners for the evening.
He saw what he did as different. Yes, he could put someone on his table at the club after talking to them for a few minutes, but he could also pull his professional wall into place without hesitation and do good without draining himself in the process. If he felt a connection with someone, he could engage a little more deeply and draw more energy from the interaction, but it was…different.
Not that he could put it into words, because he’d tried on several occasions to do just that while talking with Cherise.
Back home, he got his shower and was working on his first cup of coffee and breakfast when his cell phone rang.
Cherise. “Hey. Can you pick me up on your way in?”
“What happened?”
“Wade’s battery died and I let him take my car. He’s going to get a new battery today at lunch.”
“Sure.”
She hesitated. “Soo?”
“We can talk in the car.”
“Bad? Good? Don’t keep me hanging.”
“It wasn’t unpleasant. And that’s all you’ll get from me until I get there.” He hung up, smiling, knowing she’d practically bounce out to his car when he pulled into the driveway of their rented duplex apartment.
Sure enough, that’s exactly what she did, looking a little like an excited puppy. “Okay, so spill it,” she ordered as she buckled her seatbelt. “How’d it go?”
He recounted the evening, leaving out his suppositions regarding Eva’s potential emotional baggage. “We’re going to meet at the club Friday night and talk some more.”
Her eyes widened. “Really? That’s…that’s great!”
“Why do you seem so surprised?”
“Fucking seriously? Duh.” She poked him in the shoulder. “A second date like that for you is nearly unheard of anymore.”
“That’s not true.”
“Name the last time you went out on an actual second date-date with someone. I don’t mean going out with a group of friends, either. It’s been a couple of years, hasn’t it?”
He started to protest that she was wrong before his jaw snapped shut.
“Uh-huh,” she said. “Exactly.” She sipped coffee from her travel mug.
“Piss off,” he muttered.
She burst out laughing, almost choking on her coffee. “Oh. My. God. I’m right. You really like her.”
“What if I do?”
She let out one of those “bless your heart” kind of little-sister sighs she used on him when she had to explain something to him. “That’s not a bad thing. It’s a good thing. It means she must be a special person. And you went Brit on me there for a minute. That means I know I’m right because you know I’m right.”
He couldn’t help it that his formative years learning swear words were spent in England. Compared to
American profanity, they had some bloody brilliant turns of phrase.
Unfortunately, it was an apparent tell he had that Cherise had picked up on as a kid. He sometimes reverted to the comforting feel of those original blasphemies when she’d pinned him down.
He rode the rest of the way to the office in silence while Cherise wore a smug smile and sipped her coffee.
* * * *
Today and tomorrow were work days for Eva. She would take Laurel to school before heading to work, and Jesse and Leo would pick her up.
Laurel was her usual chatty morning self all the way in to school. Eva’s normal routine was to sip her coffee and nod at the appropriate times. She was not a morning person despite her child’s proclivities.
In that way, yes, Laurel was definitely Daddy’s girl.
Eva and Jesse both had in common the desire to sleep late.
This morning, however, instead of just tuning Laurel out, Eva was thinking about last night.
About Nate.
She’d even dreamed about him. And not the longing, sexy kind of dreams she’d had about Leo since he’d left, either.
These had been vague, gauzy dreams, nothing she could hold onto in the light of day, but they’d left her feeling calm and soothed.
Much like the man in real life.
I am sooo not jumping into another relationship right now.
Friendship, however, she would not refuse.
When she took a long, hard look at her life, yes, she had friends. Friends she’d made while married to Leo. And yes, they were still there…but in all honesty, if it hadn’t been for Leo, they wouldn’t have been her friends in the first place. She likely never would have met them.
She really didn’t have any friends of her own. Even her new Suncoast Society friends were friends because of Leo and Jesse.
Not that she was complaining, because she felt beyond grateful for their love and support over the past three months.
But it would be nice to have a friend who was…hers. Just hers. Well, not just hers, but someone she initiated a friendship with and kept up her side of that exchange.
From the conversation last night, she knew Nate wasn’t looking for a quick fling, either. He seemed stable, solid, calm, and without any ulterior motives.
And she found him to be a genuinely nice guy.
It might disappoint Tilly all to hell if Eva didn’t get into a romantic relationship with the man, but Eva didn’t want to make another big mistake. Especially not with Laurel in the picture.
If things were meant to progress with Nate, they would. She wouldn’t rush them, would fight tooth and nail to not engage in wishful or magic thinking about the situation, and she would take her time and closely question herself honestly about her motivations.
She’d also bounce things off Leo and Jesse, knowing they would give her complete honesty.
She’d held back some last night. Although she trusted June and Scrye, she hadn’t wanted to get right to the source of her hesitation in front of others. She wouldn’t even tell Nate the full story yet. He didn’t need to know it. Not unless or until she let him into her life.
But she also wanted to clarify her position with him. Make sure she didn’t lead him on. Wanted him to know he shouldn’t have any expectations of her other than friendship.
Maybe it would mean risking he met someone else, but she couldn’t live her life in fear. Not anymore. She married Leo out of fear. Not fear of him—fear of everything else, seeking safety and solace in his solid, firm presence.
Look where that had gotten them. He’d been afraid to reveal the truth to her, and she’d been tightly—futilely—clinging to him until he couldn’t ignore it any longer.
None of that had been good for Laurel.
Eva still felt a lot of shame over the way she’d treated Leo during the divorce, trying to use Laurel as a bargaining chip against him to keep him there, to coax him back.
Fortunately, he’d been the bigger of the two of them and hadn’t played tit-for-tat with her. And he’d managed to shield Laurel from Eva’s idiocy.
Another reason she would be forever grateful to her ex-husband.
Maybe Laurel would never know how she’d tried to manipulate Leo into reconciling.
She could only hope.
“Mommy?”
Laurel’s voice snapped Eva back into the present. “Yes, sweetie?”
“Did you have fun at dinner last night?”
“Yes, I did. Thank you for asking. Aunt June and Uncle Scrye say hello.”
Laurel brightened. “Oh. Why couldn’t I go?”
“Because sometimes adults need to have child-free conversations. Daddy and Poppa go out with their friends, sometimes, and you stay home with me. It’s no different.”
Eva still had to get used to calling Jesse “Poppa.” Laurel had dictated that since Leo and Jesse had gotten married, he couldn’t be her “uncle” anymore and she had decided what she would call him.
None of them would argue.
Eva felt grateful to Jesse for being there in the first place. If Laurel wanted to call him the Almighty Fluffy Bunny Potentate, Eva would be fine with that, too.
Eva pulled up to the student drop-off. Laurel managed her seat belt without Eva’s help. Jesse and Leo had been working with her on that, getting her more independent. It wouldn’t be much longer before she was tall enough not to need the booster at all.
She leaned between the front seats and kissed Eva on the cheek. “Have a good day, Mommy.”
“You, too, sweetheart.”
And like that, Laurel was out the passenger side and headed into the school.
Eva watched for just a moment before pulling away. Her daughter was growing up, becoming independent.
Now it was time for her to follow suit and get her act together once and for all.
Chapter Eight
Eva and Nate texted back and forth a few times before Friday evening. Eva decided to drive herself to the club and said that outright rather than dancing around the issue.
It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Nate, because she did.
But…
She didn’t trust herself. If something happened, or she decided she needed to leave, it was better if she had her own transportation.
She wouldn’t deny she was looking forward to spending time with Nate. Yes, she could have scheduled an appointment for another treatment with him. This was…different.
Alone with him, but not alone with him.
She pulled into the club’s parking lot a few minutes after eight, as he was just getting out of his car.
“Perfect timing,” he joked.
Her heart thrummed a little at his smile. With his long hair loose, just past his shoulders, he almost looked younger than his forty-one years, even with the grey. Tonight he wore jeans and a black button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up below his elbows. He carried a small pack in his hand, a plastic organizer about the size of a book.
“What’s that?”
“Travel kit,” he said. “I meant it when I said I’d do a treatment for you, if you want.”
She felt herself blush as they walked toward the office, him matching her strides. “I feel a little bad about that.”
“Why? I offered.” He stopped her, making her turn to face him, staring down at her. “I’m an adult. I’m perfectly able to decide if I want to do something. I could see it helped you the other night. I like helping people. That’s part of why I do this at the club.”
“Okay. Thank you.”
He opened the door to the office and held it for her. “You’re very welcome.”
Jenny was manning the desk tonight. “Hey, Crawford. I didn’t know you were coming tonight.”
He set the travel kit on the counter and fished out his wallet. “Two, please.” He handed over cash.
Jenny stared at the money for a moment before taking it from him. “Um…we comp you.”
“Not tonight. I’m not here to do a demo.”
“Oh. You sure? I don’t want Marcia chewing me out for charging you.”
He leaned his long, lithe body against the counter. “You send her my way, I’ll set her straight.” He locked gazes with Eva and she felt her throat dry up.
Okay, yes, he was an easy-going kind of guy, normally. But she sensed the Dom she’d seen hints of the night of Leo and Jesse’s collaring. As far as she knew—well, for as long as she’d known him—he was single and didn’t do the same kind of play she’d seen others, including Leo, engage in.
But yes, there was that beast, curled beneath the surface.
She’d spent enough time around the Suncoast Society folks to sense a commonality amongst the Doms and Dommes who were held highest in terms of respect by their peers. They all had a very quiet, watchful way about them in some regards. They observed. They took mental notes. They contemplated. Even Tilly, who had an apparently irascible nature when it came to being protective of her friends, the few times Eva had seen the woman scene, it was like a different person stepped into Tilly’s shoes. She was deliberate, unflappable.
Nate had that something, too.
“Thank you,” she said to him. “I wasn’t expecting you to pay my way in tonight.”
“You’re welcome, and I know.” He arched an eyebrow at her. “And that’s why I did it.” He signed them both in and after they’d received wristbands, Nate picked up his travel pack and led the way inside.
There weren’t a lot of people there yet. One of the rope clubs was finishing up a workshop and there were people in various states of undress—and various stages of rope bondage—scattered throughout the space.
He led her to the far side of the social area and sat at one of the tables, setting his pack on the table next to him. His smile warmed her, touched her soul in places. Leo and Jesse smiled at her, but they were…
Well, they belonged to each other. It was nice having a smile meant for her, one she didn’t have to share with another recipient.
Wait—danger thinking!
She took a deep breath. “Thank you for the other night. And for tonight. I really appreciate it.”
He shrugged. “If it was a hardship, I wouldn’t do it. I had fun the other night.”
The Strength of the Pack Page 6
