by Kendall Ryan
Before I met Lacey, I had thought I was taking life easy. But it wasn’t really an easy life if I had to work so hard to maintain it—building my walls high, suspicious of any surprise, shunning any connection that might demand too much. Like living as a guest in my own home, afraid to touch or peer too deeply into anything.
Lacey had shown me how good it felt to drop those inhibitions. To be caught off guard, to lose control, to let life wash over me with all its messy entanglements and contradictions. Being with her, I realized what home was supposed to feel like.
She held out her hand and I slipped the ring onto her finger. I wasn’t much of a jewelry guy, but the sparkly rock on her slim finger was stunning. Even more so because of what it signified. She was going to be mine forever.
Then I kissed her again tenderly, taking my time and luxuriating in her warmth. Whatever this life threw at us next, I couldn’t wait to share it with Lacey—my biggest surprise, my best contradiction, my brightest light.
She’d been the one running, but somehow she’d chased away all my demons and forced me to see what was right in front of me. We’d saved each other in the process, and now she was mine. And I was hers. A thought that didn’t scare me, but instead made me feel whole.
“I love you,” I whispered, bringing her mouth to mine to steal one more kiss.
Author’s Note
This story is unconventional, and that was intentional on my part. Thousands of romance novels are published every year, and many follow the same formula. As a reader, I always get excited when an author takes a risk and writes something outside the box, or reimagines an old concept, breathing fresh life into it. My hope is that you enjoyed this story and that it was a unique experience for you. I am happy that I got to tell it.
While writing this book, I experienced my own traumatic life-threatening event. I haven’t talked about it with many people, but I’m ready to share it now with you. One afternoon last fall, I was followed, stalked, and threatened by a man who—the only way I can say it—went crazy and came after me. I had to call 911, and I honestly feared for my life.
I like to think of myself as a tough cookie, but in that moment, while trying to get away from him in my car, I was also trying to explain to the 911 operator what was going on, give her my name, a description of the man, etc. My voice was wavering and my heart was beating a million miles a minute. I did get away safely, after about a ten-minute ordeal, and the man took off and left before the police arrived.
It was only later, when I was safe at home with my husband, that I reflected on this incident. This book, which was about ninety percent done at the time, popped into my mind, and the correlation was easy to make. I honestly felt like I was Lacey and my husband was Nolan. He was my protector, and I felt safer in his arms than anywhere else. He’d kick anyone’s ass for me and would never let any harm come my way. Instead of just writing about heart-pumping adrenaline and fight or flight response, I had lived it that day.
Lacey arguably makes some strange choices, but those became clearer to me too. When you feel threatened, common sense is overshadowed by something more primal. You might make different choices than you anticipate.
After this event happened, I considered posting about it on social media, as I do with most major events in my life. I’m a writer; it’s what I do. Putting words down to explain exactly what happened sounded therapeutic in some ways, plus I enjoy keeping my readers updated with my life.
But this felt too personal. Too, I don’t know . . . delicate. So I chose not to say anything at all.
I will tell you it’s changed me in some ways. I don’t take things for granted, I hug my babies tighter at night, I check the locks on my doors more often. But I promise you, I am okay. Many people—some of you reading this, I’m sure—have dealt with much worse. My heart goes out to you. (That’s another reason I didn’t want to say anything; I didn’t want to sound like a drama queen or a whiner.)
Thank you for reading. And thank you for being there for me. I’m learning to appreciate every little thing, and one that’s most dear to me is you, my readers.
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Coming Soon in the Alphas Undone Series
Slow & Steady
When former Navy SEAL Greyson Archer tosses a twenty on the stage of a strip club, the last thing he expects to see is a pair of familiar haunted green eyes staring at him. Finley should be home raising her infant daughter and baking cookies, not tucking singles into her G-string and giving lap dances.
Greyson can’t deny that he’d like his own private show, but there’s not a chance in hell of that happening. The last time he saw her she was dressed in black, holding a folded flag and sobbing that it was all his fault—and he’d agreed with every single word. He couldn’t do anything to help her then, but he can now.
Finley deserves better than this dingy club, and when an obsessed customer crosses the line, Greyson leads the rescue and will do whatever it takes to make amends for their broken past.
He never expected to want to settle down, but with Finley, everything is different. For the first time ever, he can breathe. But Greyson will have to fight for what he wants in order to keep the woman with the green eyes he’s dreamed about so often.
Acknowledgments
To my developmental editor, Angela Smith, wow. You read some pretty crappy first drafts of this book and you still believed in it, which is pretty dang amazing. Thank you.
To Alexandra, your help was both superb and timely. Thank you for everything!
Melissa K., thank you for beta reading an early version of this story and helping to point out the weak spots.
And Pam Berehulke, as always, you rock my world, lady. Editor extraordinaire.
My very own Nolan, you might not be an ex-SEAL, but you’re my hero all the same.
About the Author
A New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and USA TODAY best-selling author of more than twenty titles, Kendall Ryan has sold more than a million e-books, and her books have been translated into several languages in countries around the world. She’s a traditionally published author with Simon & Schuster and Harper Collins UK, as well as an independently published author.
Since she first began self-publishing in 2012, she’s appeared at #1 on Barnes & Noble and iBooks charts around the world. Her books have also appeared on the New York Times and USA TODAY best-seller list more than two dozen times. Ryan has been featured in such publications as USA TODAY, Newsweek, and In Touch Weekly.
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Other Books by Kendall Ryan
Unravel Me Series:
Unravel Me
Make Me Yours
Love by Design Series:
Working It
Craving Him
All or Nothing
When I Break Series:
When I Break
When I Surrender
When We Fall
When I Break (complete series)
Filthy Beautiful Lies Series:
Filthy Beautiful Lies
Filthy Beautiful Love
Filthy Beautiful Lust
Filthy Beautiful Forever
Lessons with the Dom Series:
The Gentleman Mentor
Sinfully Mine
Stand-alone Novels:
Hard to Love
Reckless Love
Resisting Her
The Impact of You
Screwed
Monster Prick
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