by D Gourlay
“Magic.” I laugh and stroke her hair absentmindedly. “You know this is just how we get to the honeymoon, it’s not supposed to be the best part?”
“Well, you’d better have something pretty spectacular up your sleeve! If you told me we were going straight home I’d be happy enough to be honest.”
A few hours later, we are sitting in the back of a yellow cab, being driven from the airport to our hotel. Rachel is practically glued to the window, trying to look at everything.
The cab pulls up outside of the Four Seasons and a concierge opens the door and helps Rachel out. I pay the cab driver before joining Rachel in front of the wide doors going into the hotel.
“It’s huge!” She gasps, looking up.
“Why, thank you.” I smirk and she nudges me. The concierge takes our cases and we follow him inside. We have barely made it a few feet inside when Rachel stops and turns in a circle.
“Wow.”
I laugh softly at her. “Come on you, reception is this way.”
Our footsteps echo around us as we climb the stone stairs towards reception and are greeted by two women behind the desk.
“Mr and Mrs Turner?” One of the women asks. I see Rachel’s face light up from next to me.
“Yes that’s us.” I smile and Rachel grabs my hand.
“Welcome to the Four Seasons, and congratulations on your marriage.” She says with a thick New York accent. “You’re staying in the Ty Warner Penthouse, which is located right at the top of the building, on the fifty second floor. My name is Paula, please don’t hesitate to call down if there’s anything you need. Enjoy your stay.” She hands over the keycard and we follow the concierge over to the lift.
Rachel is practically bouncing with excitement by the time we walk into the suite. She hurries over to a huge window, and looks down at the lit up city beneath us.
“Woah Tad this is just-” She turns and catches sight of the grand piano on the other side of the room. “Oh my…” She sits on the stool and turns to look out of another oversized window, showing an entirely different view of New York.
I tip the concierge and slowly walk over to Rach when he has left. I sit beside her on the stool and her fingers absentmindedly tinkle over a few of the keys.
“Do you play?” I ask casually.
“I used to. Haven’t done in years though.” She turns and slides her fingers over the keys, positioning them ready to play. Her fingers start to move and the room is filled with a beautiful melody. I find myself in absolute awe of this woman, and I can feel pride, bubbling away in my stomach, that she is mine.
Her fingers move so fast along the keys that I can’t keep up, the song she is playing is not one I’ve heard before. It’s elegant, and sends goosebumps over my skin. I sit and listen until she eventually slows and stops.
“I can’t believe I remembered how to play that.” She says, sounding genuinely pleased with herself.
“That was incredible. I can’t believe I didn’t know you played.”
“Woman of many hidden talents obviously.” She shrugs, smiling.
“Obviously.” I agree with her and lean my forehead into hers. “When was the last time you played?”
“Years, not since before Ami was born. I had a beautiful piano at Mum and Dad’s. They got it for me when I was twelve. But certain people thought it was annoying, so I sold it before I left home.” She rolls her eyes and goes back to delicately fingering the keys, creating the most relaxing sounds.
I show her around the suite, and her smile doesn’t falter once.
When I take her out onto the balcony, I find the heater has been turned on, waiting for us. There is a bench, covered with plump looking cushions, and a thick blanket folded at one end. We sit and I wrap the blanket around both of us, before I pour us both a glass of champagne, which has been left on the table in a bucket of ice.
We sit in comfortable silence for a while, until I catch Rach looking contemplative.
“You okay?” I squeeze her leg a little and she smiles at me.
“Amazing.” She leans in closer to me. “You know, that even if you’d booked some shitty little hotel with rats and cockroaches, I’d still have been this happy, don’t you?”
I laugh. “You might have been, but I’m not sure how happy I’d be with cockroaches buzzing around us!” I kiss her cheek and she gives me a look.
“You know what I mean. It’s just, this is nice. No, this is amazing, but I’m here for you. Not your money. I’d love you even if you were broke and living in a box.”
“Where’s all this come from?” I ask, a little concerned.
She shuffles up and looks at me. “Well, I’m just guessing here, as I didn’t hear very much. But I’m assuming you telling your mother to leave the wedding had something to do with me, and probably something to do with money.” She nervously chews her bottom lip and I use my thumb to pull her lip from between her teeth.
“Rach, my mother is a horrible, bitter person. She has always been obsessed with money and material things, and it got in the way of everything growing up. I don’t know why, but my Dad loved the bones off her and would have done anything for her. He worked his arse off day in and day out to make sure she had enough money to live her lifestyle. It made neither of them happy, and in the end the distance between her and her own children became irreversible.
“Yes, I have money, and I’ve worked hard for it, and yes I guess I’m used to it now. So it’s not a big deal to me. I enjoy splashing out on you, I enjoy making you feel special, and appreciated. And if ever, God forbid, you decided to leave me, I’d happily give you anything and everything, because frankly my life would be meaningless without you anyway and money wouldn’t fix it.”
“Tad, I can tell you, from the very bottom of my heart, that the chances of me ever wanting to leave you are so small, there isn’t even a percentage for it. Is that what she was worried about? That I was just marrying you for your money?” She asks softly.
“Yes, she was upset we hadn’t signed a pre-nup.” I roll my eyes at the memory.
“That’s ridiculous.” She sighs. “It’s not even as though pre-nups are legally enforceable anyway.” I narrow my eyes at her, questioning how she even knows that, and she shrugs. “I looked into it okay? I knew what people would think. I thought that if I signed something to state I wouldn’t ask for any money from you in the event of a divorce, then people might not be so judgy.” She takes a sip of her drink and I’m at a loss for words.
“Rach-”
“No, I know. It shouldn’t matter what people think. It doesn’t matter what people think. But the press talk about you as if you are some golden hero, beautiful, generous blah blah… And then there’s me. Divorced to a murderer, child in tow, who suddenly sweeps you off your feet the second the first husband is out of the picture.” She looks defeated and I wrap her in my arms and pull her on my lap.
“Let people think what they want to Rach. We know how we feel. Ami isn’t stupid enough to take any notice of the papers, and I’d like to think none of our friends and family are either. They are the only people you should be worried about. I love you more than I ever thought it possible to love anything. And I don’t doubt for one second how much you love me. So sod everyone else.” I feel her relax in my arms.
Our eyes scan the skyline and I begin to point out the various buildings we can see, making notes of where we should go while we are here. Before long, Rachel’s breathing becomes heavy and I realise she has fallen asleep in my arms. Carefully, I carry her into bed, where I crawl in next to her.
After a delicious breakfast in bed, we’ve decided to go exploring. We walk past a coffee shop, grab drinks and go for a walk through Central Park. Rach walks slowly, taking everything in, and we try to make a plan for the day.
We decide to head towards the Empire State Building, detouring through Times Square. Rachel hardly blinks as we walk, eyes wildly looking at all the screens, taking in all the sights around her. I laugh quietly
to myself as I wonder if I looked like that the first time I came to New York.
After almost an hour of walking, which really would have only been half as long if Rach hadn’t continuously stopped to show me various people or shops, we finally reach the entrance to the Empire State Building.
After taking the lift to the eighty sixth floor, Rach and I step out on to the observation deck, the wind is fierce up here. I pull my collar up around my neck and watch Rachel skip excitedly to the side. She peers through the bars and calls me over, when I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket. I look and don’t recognise the number. I let it go to voicemail, assuming if it’s important they can leave a message.
I join Rachel and start pointing out the various buildings I can see, when my phone rings again.
“It’s okay, you can take it.” Rach says as she looks through a set of binoculars.
Sighing, I press the answer button. “Hello?”
“Well, I hear congratulations are in order.” A gruff voice says from the other end of the phone.
“Sorry, who is this?” I ask, covering my other ear to try to hear better.
“You know who this is.” I suddenly feel the colour drain from my face as I realise just who is speaking to me. I step away from Rachel to make sure she can’t hear me.
“Kevin? How the fuck did you get this number?” I growl and he laughs.
“Oh, me getting hold of your phone number should be the last thing you concern yourself with.”
“I’m hanging up now, and I won’t be answering your calls again so don’t bother-”
“You will not be hanging up until I have said what I need to.” He interrupts, and something about the tone of his voice makes me keep listening. “You see I still have some friends outside of this place, and it’s funny the things people keep on their computers. Important things, things that should really be kept behind lock and key. Certain contracts, and the like.” I feel as though all of the breath has been knocked from me as I realise what he is talking about.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I try to say with as much conviction as I can manage.
“Oh come on now, don’t insult my intelligence.”
“Your intelligence?” I scoff, and he remains eerily quiet for a few seconds.
“I know all about your little affairs, your gagging orders to stop the world finding out what a despicable creature you are. You know it’s illegal to pay for sex, don’t you?” I hear the smirk in his voice and my stomach churns.
“And even if you told anybody, you’d then have to admit to yet another crime, and I doubt that will do anything good for your sentence, no matter what happens to me.”
He laughs out loud. “You really do think I’m stupid don’t you?! The information would be leaked anonymously, of course. And even if you did manage to worm your way out of prison time, I hardly think our dear Rachel would be particularly happy about what you’d been up to, would she?” My anger rises and I struggle to keep my voice quiet.
“Don’t you even mention her name.”
“What, your wife, my damaged goods? You know she came to visit me, don’t you?” I open my mouth but nothing comes out.
Rachel visited him? When? Why? “Oh, you didn’t know. Looks like both of you have secrets hey?” I try to say something, anything, but my brain is swimming with images of Rachel lying to me and going to visit him in prison.
“I have to go now, phone time is almost up. You will tell nobody about this conversation, do you understand. All it takes is one phone call from me and all your deepest darkest secrets will be splashed all over the front cover of every newspaper the next day. I’ll be seeing you soon Turner, very soon.”
“What do you mean seeing me soon? If you think I’m coming to visit you in prison then you can think again.” He just laughs and then I hear the line click before it goes dead.
I put my phone in my pocket, and my eyes travel back to Rachel. She is still peering through the binoculars, looking at the view.
The hurt I feel in that moment, the betrayal. Why would she go and visit him? And why the fuck did she do it behind my back?
Unless she didn’t. I mean, it’s not like Kevin is the most reliable person. Maybe he is just trying to cause trouble. But- Oh fuck. The non-disclosures. I can’t risk saying anything to Rachel.
She turns to look at me, and her eyes narrow as they meet mine. I give myself a little shake, try to soften my face and walk over to her.
“What’s wrong?” She grabs my arm, and half of me wants to move away from her touch.
“Nothing, just a work thing. I’m sure Scott will be able to handle it.” I curve my lips into a fake smile, and she seems happy enough with that.
We sit in silence in the cab on the way to the restaurant we have dinner reservations at. My mind is racing and I’m not sure what to think. I catch Rachel staring sadly out of the window and something clicks.
This is our honeymoon. We will only ever get one honeymoon and I need to put a pin in everything else for now. Yes, Kevin has the files, and I have no idea what he wants with them, but worrying about it now is going to do nobody any good. I can call Thane as soon as we are back and make a plan.
As for Rachel visiting him in prison, it just doesn’t make any sense. What does make sense is that Kevin is a liar and chances are he is lying about this. For what reason I’m not sure, but that sure as hell makes more sense to me than Rachel sneaking off to meet him.
I pull her in close to me and kiss her softly while I desperately try to temporarily forget everything Kevin said.
Rachel
The day started off so well, but Tad seems to have been preoccupied since his phone call this afternoon. I’m not sure what’s happened. He said it wasn’t important, but he’s been so quiet since then.
We’ve spent the afternoon walking around the city, stopping at a few little tourist type places, but as it starts to get dark it becomes obvious Tad’s not here at all. We’re stood outside of a beautiful steak house, and I’ve been trying to get Tad’s attention so we can go inside, but he is staring into space, seemingly a million miles away.
“Come on, let’s go back to the hotel.” I snap and he suddenly looks at me.
“Oh, but we’ve got reservations.” He says.
“Cancel them. We’ll go another night. Your head clearly isn’t here today.” I smile softly at him. His job is stressful, I get it.
He sighs heavily. “Sorry Rach.” He grabs my hand and smiles. “Let’s go back and have dinner at the hotel. Then we’ll have an early night and try again tomorrow.”
I squeeze his hand and let him hail a cab. I haven’t walked as much as I have today in ages, if ever, and my legs are on fire.
Tad is sleeping soundly next to me and I find myself unable to relax. I sneak out of bed and sit next to one of the huge windows, looking down over Central Park. I wish he would tell me what’s going on. He said it’s just work and not to worry, but he’s been so absent today. I sigh into my hands and watch the hustle and bustle of the city that never sleeps underneath us.
I work out it’s about three in the morning back home. Far too early to be calling anyone. So I send quick texts to Ami and Mum to let them know what I’ve done today.
I lean back into the cosy arm chair, and pull a blanket around me. Before long my eyes become heavy and I struggle to keep them open.
Tad and I are being pushed and pulled in every direction. The crowd around us is huge and dense and my fingertips cling to his in a desperate attempt to keep us together. With a final push from the people around us, our fingers separate, leaving me alone and lost in this vast crowd of strangers. I’m being pulled along, while desperately trying to find Tad, but my shouts make almost no sound over the voices of everyone around me.
Eventually the crowd thins, and I find myself in a dark alley. The people have disappeared and I am suddenly alone. My ears strain to hear anything, any small sound, but they are just greeted with intense silence. I start tr
ying to find my way back, but the alley way seems never ending. The walls start to close in on me, the farther I walk, so I turn in the other direction, only for the walls to widen and then being to move closer again.
My heart starts beating rapidly as I realise I’m trapped. But then I hear footsteps.
“Tad?” I call out, hopeful.
The footsteps stop. Tad looks at me, no, through me and then continues walking. He walks past me and I’m aware of a second set of footsteps coming from in front of me.
Another figure stops in the shadows in front of Tad. I’m shouting and screaming, but no noise escapes my mouth. Suddenly the shadowed figure produces a knife and drives it straight into Tad’s chest.
That laugh.
That laugh.
I wake suddenly. Crazed laughter still ringing in my ears, the sunlight streaming through the window straight into my eyes. I try to catch my breath and realise I must have fallen asleep in the chair.
I lift my head and feel a searing pain in my neck from where I have slept at such an awkward angle. Slowly I turn my head left and right and roll my shoulders. I glance at my phone and see it’s only just six.
Slowly and quietly, I creep back into bed next to Tad and shuffle as close as I can to him without waking him.
He breathes deeply and turns into me, hand brushing mine, I lace my fingers in between his.
“Hmm morning beautiful.” He sighs and kisses my shoulder.
“Morning, how did you sleep?”
“Like a log. You?”
My nightmare flashes through my mind again. “Good thanks.” I lie and kiss the top of his head.
His fingers start stroking up and down my stomach and I try to push all thoughts of the dream out of my mind.
“I’m starving.” He says and lifts himself to kiss me on the lips.
“Let’s go get breakfast then.” I mumble into his lips.
“Hmm. Maybe in a little while.” He murmurs into my mouth as he kisses me fervently. I smile and feel the stress of yesterday melt away with every flick of his tongue.
